The Difference Love Makes
by myLink'sLady
Summary: Sequel to my Wishes of the Soul. Will Inuyasha and Kagome be able to mend their fences?
1. Chapter 1

The Difference Love Makes

Two days after Kagome returned home and the well sealed behind her, Mama was sitting quietly on her own with a cup of tea and an opened letter in front of her. The children were at school and her father-in-law was at a friend's house; so for the first time Mama could indulge in tears. She grieved for the loss of a young man she considered as a son and who had died five hundred years in the past.

Technically she had been assured that Inuyasha had not died, but this made no difference with the well sealed; she would never see her son again and she worried still about how his life had turned out. Mama had developed a special rapport with the irascible young man who hid his kind and loving heart behind a brittle persona with which he tried to hide his self doubt and hatred from everyone.

His brash and coarse behaviour and language worked well for the most part, but it was easy for a mother to see through it to the often shy and frightened child beneath. Over the years, Inuyasha had come to accept her somewhat, in the place of his own much missed mother and trusted her with his thoughts and feelings knowing that she would not betray him.

Often when Kagome and Souta left for school; Mama would sit with him and just listen if he wished to speak, or just be there if he was silent or brooding, her presence was enough to comfort him and make him feel safe. Mama understood better than her daughter did about the 'Kikyou' situation and did not berate him for his loyalties to his first love, whilst she recognised the love he now had for her daughter.

Inuyasha was nothing if not complicated, but his word and his honour were all that he had had in his life and he held true to them. Once he had promised to aid and protect Kikyou, there had been no other option open to him, even at the risk of causing of pain to his friends and himself. But Mama had no doubt that Inuyasha would have been released by the tragic Kikyou in the end; love was always stronger than hate in the long run.

But now, all that opportunity was lost; Kagome and Inuyasha were separated not only by the closure of the well but also by the girl's foolish behaviour with a puppet Sesshoumaru. Her 'crush' had devastated the hanyou and time had been against the couple to repair the damage. This was the most damaging legacy of Naraku as far as Mama was concerned; this final separation of her children.

Since Kagome had come home so distressed and unable to fully explain to Mama all that had happened yet, Mama had been needed to comfort and she had only gleaned that Inuyasha had been returned to his brother's care as a child. This needed further clarification but Kagome had been unable to give it; hopefully getting back to school routine would settle her down and she'd be able to accept what could not be changed.

Strangely Kagome had been most eager to return to school on that Monday morning but had not divulged any particular reason for this and Mama was only too happy to see the girl without the tears falling down her cheeks to question her too closely. But now Mama was the one shedding tears in private for the boy who had always had to fight for his right to exist, let alone be happy.

A knock at the door brought Mama out of her despondency and she found out with a shock that she had been moping for longer than she had realised and the time for the appointment that had been made with her for that morning had arrived. Hastily wiping her eyes, she scanned the letter again for the name of her visitor before going to open the door.

A middle aged, bespectacled man a bit taller and older than Mrs Higurashi stood outside holding a briefcase and accompanied by a lovely young woman. Mama's eyes filled again as she saw the girl who looked very similar in colouring to the human Inuyasha, especially as she had such long hair. Violet eyes as well were after all, unusual. She blinked quickly and forced a large smile which did not fool the man.

He glanced at her shrewdly before asking if she would rather they returned on another day, but Mama said she was fine and as the meeting was about Kagome's education, she would rather not leave it any longer. At his nod, Mama invited the couple in and offered tea which was gladly accepted and then it was time to get down to business. Mr Shiroinu looked to his daughter, who was also his colleague and she got out her laptop and had soon pulled up Kagome's school records.

Mama was trying to not get concerned at the glaring gaps and false excuses all listed down on the computer for the last two years. Was she going to find herself in deep trouble after this visit because of the obvious truancy of her daughter to which she had conspired? Her nervousness was noticed by Mr Shiroinu who smiled reassuringly at her;

"Do not be concerned about the past; we are here to see if we can help Kagome make up some of the learning that she needs to enter college. As Director of Education it is my responsibility to make sure that all willing students achieve their potential."

"I...I don't understand, how can Kagome fully catch up on all she has lost?"

"Your daughter can have special tutors in maths, geography and science as a start, she is coping with her other subjects with perhaps a little extra help at times."

"That would be wonderful, but I'm afraid that we couldn't possibly afford such tutors. Is there no way she can catch up using computer work?"

"The method is not as efficient as when there is a tutor who can correct misunderstandings before they become entrenched ideas. You need have no concerns about the finances; the institute I direct can offer tutors in exceptional cases. Your daughter falls into this category." Before he had finished speaking there was an exasperated sound from the violet eyed daughter;

"Feh! My battery has gone flat, sorry do you think I can use one of your..?" Miss Shiroinu had stopped in dismay and looked to her father before going to Mama's side. The familiar exclamation coupled with the girl's looks, were too much and Mama had put her hand to her mouth with a stricken sob. Immediately, the girl put her arms round Mama's shoulders;

"Keh! I know it's a lot to take in an' all that but please there is no need to cry."

"Or perhaps something else causes your distress Madam Higurashi? You seemed upset when we first arrived. Can we help in anyway?" Mr Shiroinu was calm, his voice concerned.

"No, I'm sorry; it's only that your daughter reminds me greatly of someone who was very dear to me and the family."

"You talk as if the person is in the past; I'm sorry for your loss." Miss Shiroinu was gentle and encouraged Mama to talk to her, while her father made another pot of tea.

"Yes, he has recently died; a dear boy whom I considered as a son. He was a neglected child; an orphan and despite his tough guy exterior, he was a gentle and loving boy. We used to talk a great deal and even though no one could replace his mother in his heart, he came to trust me in her stead."

Mr Shiroinu placed steaming tea and a plate of sweet biscuits in front of them all and sat down studying Mama closely.

"I was not aware of any child who has died in any of the children's homes locally. Perhaps the boy had family somewhere and had gone to live with them. Will Kagome require time to take off for the funeral?"

"No, he died far away. He had an older brother who I hope eventually took care of him."

"You think his brother would not care for the younger boy? Perhaps I can find out for you, I have many contacts."

"Thank you, you are very kind; but it is not necessary. There were hard feelings between the boys and I can only hope that my son was finally happy. One of his greatest wishes and the one that caused him the bitterest tears was the estrangement with his brother whom he admired and loved above anyone else."

More tears accompanied this confession as she remembered holding Inuyasha to her in comfort; when he felt that he could only let his guard down and anguish out when nobody who was relying on him for being strong and not weak was around. Eventually Mama dried her eyes and smiled, apologising for bothering her guest with her problems.

Neither of her visitors had been put out however and went back to the business of arranging tutors for Kagome after Mr Shiroinu remembered that he had a spare battery for the laptop in his car. If Kagome was prepared to give up her Saturday mornings and an extra hour each evening besides giving up the idea of a small job in her spare time, she could attain college level within the year.

Mama agreed that Kagome would indeed be happy to do this in exchange for the schooling and her first lesson was set for the following Saturday with Miss Shiroinu who was a Mathematics Teacher. She would also be the tutor for geography and Mama was pleased to have already been introduced. The pair then packed up to leave after making sure that Mama was calm, Miss Shiroinu reminding her that she would see her again on Saturday.

She was interrupted from the washing up by another knock at the door and opened it to a young man who so closely resembled Miss Shiroinu that he could have been her brother. Taking a chance she said.

"Mr Shiroinu?" On receiving his brief nod she carried on. "How can I help you; has your father left something behind? Please come in, are you going to be one of Kagome's extra tutors?"

"No, well not as such; I will be taking up a teaching post at her school in the next term."

"Does Mr Shiroinu have more children in education?"

"Sort of, one of his other sons is the one who will tutor your daughter in Science."

"Quite the family business, that's nice and I really am most grateful to you all. Did you find what you were looking for?" Mama had turned back to her sink when she felt someone behind her enclose her in a familiar embrace, leaning his head on her back. She stiffened at the contact before she heard him say;

"Mama, it's me."

"Inuyasha, it's truly you?" Mama whispered and reached back to feel for his ears before turning to see him. He looked his normal human self and yet she could feel his ears and realised that he was wearing a concealment charm of some sort. "Let me see you properly, please my son; I need to see that you are well."

"Inuyasha removed a ring from his finger and the flowing raven hair turned white and the glistening violet eyes changed to gold. Mama reached to caress the puppy ears that once again were visible on his head. But he had changed, his clothing was modern, smart dress trousers and a shirt left open at the throat and he was now smiling, relaxed and happy. Mama crushed him to her and let him return the favour as he snuffled at her hair and sighed; his eyes watering from the old memories.

Eventually Mama made another pot of tea and he had some ramen for old time's sake; remembering that for her, it had been only days since she'd said farewell to a distraught young hanyou. Fondly watching the boy eat and his overall demeanour gave Mama a great deal of pleasure; he was more confident and assured than she had ever seen him before even when he was putting on his act, because this was natural.

Once over her pleasant shock and her maternal need to feed and cherish had been fulfilled for a while, Mama's need for answers came to the fore.

"Inuyasha, you share the same surname with Mr Shiroinu and his daughter; were you adopted by them."

"He is my father, she my sister; well to all intents and purposes. Really it is my brother Sesshoumaru and my niece Shami. Would you like me to introduce you to them now you know who they really are? "

Mama certainly would be interested in meeting the famed Sesshoumaru in person and seeing how such a short middle aged man had at one point captured her daughter's interest. She knew there was some illusion but Inuyasha was not greatly changed, however she had understood Sesshoumaru to be taller. Perhaps to children, the very real and dangerous personage of Inuyasha's brother had made him seem bigger in some way.

Inuyasha went to the door and called gently to his brother and once again Mr Shiroinu came in and sat down, this time with an amused smile visible around his lips. Mama made yet more tea and asked if Miss Shiroinu wanted to come in as well, only to be told that she had gone back to work.

"Please take off the concealment Sesshpapa; let Mama see how you really are." Inuyasha's intense look at his brother strongly reminded her of a much smaller child proudly showing off his parent. But when Mr Shiroinu removed his spectacles and the tall elegant Sesshoumaru was revealed, Mama fully understood how Kagome had been led astray; the youkai was staggeringly beautiful. Not that that was any excuse.

Mama was amazed at the sheer presence of the creature before her and was even more taken aback when he bowed his head to her and offered her his sincere thanks for her care of his little brother at a time when he himself had fallen short. Mama was gracious and did not demean the Lord's thanks by denying them; instead she too bowed saying,

"You have more than made up the lack My Lord. Inuyasha looks very well on your care for which I too am grateful; as I love this boy as a son."

"I am sorry that I did not realise how much the not knowing, would mean to you." Sesshoumaru now glanced at his red faced and horribly embarrassed brother, who just folded his arms and said _'Feh!'_ making them both laugh gently at him. Some things obviously hadn't changed.

"Kagome is going to be so pleased to see you Inuyasha not to mention, Souta and Grandpa."

"No, Mama. I don't want Kagome to know that I am here yet; please don't tell her."

TBC


	2. The Shiroinu Family

Chapter Two The Shiroinu Family

"You don't want Kagome to know that you are safe and well Inuyasha? That seems a bit harsh; she is very upset, the well closed two days ago and she has hardly said anything about what happened. The only time she brightened up was when she was going to school. Perhaps she knows something."

"Maybe Mama and I don't want to cause her any more distress than I have too, but..." Inuyasha was halted by an elegant clawed hand on his wrist.

"Lady Higurashi, would you please join us for dinner this evening. There is much to discuss; you will have many questions you need answered I am sure. We also need to agree on what to tell Kagome when Inuyasha starts to take her history class."

"She will recognise him. I will _not_ see Kagome hurt anymore for a stupid growing up mistake Inuyasha. You know my daughter; you know she truly loves you and only you."

"I know and I don't want to cause her pain."

"Please Lady Higurashi, accept dinner with us and we can discuss this further. My car will pick you up for seven if that is alright with you?"

"_Please_ Mama, it's important." Inuyasha made her smile with his big puppy eyes expression and Sesshoumaru sighed.

"That will not work Inuyasha; you are no longer a small pup."

"I'll let it work this once Lord Sesshoumaru, I will of course be happy to accept your invitation." Inuyasha just grinned at his brother before whispering to Mama;

"It still works on him too." And he ducked out of the way of Sesshoumaru's hand which was aimed to give him a clip round the ear. Mama was pleased and relieved to see the affectionate by-play between them.

"Obnoxious pup." Sesshoumaru grumbled fondly; as this time he successfully made contact with the ear earning him a satisfactory yelp from Inuyasha. As they left down the shrine steps, Mama watched as Inuyasha pranced around his brother trying to annoy and get his attention while Sesshoumaru just as steadfastly ignored him.

Mama found herself getting quite excited at the prospect of going out to dinner. It was not something that happened a lot to a woman with two growing children and an elderly relative who still relied on her presence. She spent the next couple of hours in preparing the evening meal so that she would only have to cook it later, thereby giving herself time to get ready and even pamper herself a bit.

Her father-in-law had returned from his visit and fully endorsed her evening out, although she didn't tell him who Mr Shiroinu really was. First she needed to get things clear in her own mind before she spoke to anyone else, however closely they were involved. Grandpa though was imagining romance already, which caused Mama to blush; before she firmly denied the fact, stating that the gentleman in question was married. Grandpa heaved a frustrated sigh before chuckling to himself; maybe Mr Shiroinu had a friend...

As it was when Kagome came home from school, Mama found that she was needed again. The girl just headed for her bedroom in the familiar despondency that used to signify an argument with Inuyasha. This time however Mama insisted on knowing what it was that was troubling her daughter and she also wanted to know what had happened on that last day, on the other side of the well.

So it was that she finally heard the full version of that day when Midoriko appeared and the jewel was finally laid to rest. Kagome spoke of her sadness when she thought of Sango and Miroku being long dead now in the past and of not knowing whether or not they had the large family they both wanted.

She was saddened by the fact that Shippou was left behind to grieve that she had been taken away; he'd already lost his real mother and now his adopted one was gone as well. But more than anything else she was devastated that Inuyasha had left with his brother having forgotten who she was. He had waved goodbye and gone off to his new life along with Shippou and Rin, not caring that she was leaving forever.

She could still feel the infant Inuyasha's warm small body in her arms when he had given her a hug and rested his head against her neck; showing great trust but knowing that his brother would not allow any human to harm him again. But she was nothing special to him; his memories had been wiped clean and locked away so that he could grow up as a loved child without all the psychological baggage, which was all he had ever really wanted.

Of course Kagome was happy for him and the way things had turned out, her hanyou deserved all that Sesshoumaru could do for him by his care; but it left Kagome empty for herself until she realised what Midoriko was telling her. So Kagome had hurried to school that day; hoping to see the new history teacher, only to find that there was no new teacher at all. It had taken all of Kagome's self control not to run straight back home.

She burst into tears at last with the memory of Inuyasha clutched tightly in Sesshoumaru's arms walking away from her and waving, firmly etched on her brain. All Mama could do was hold the girl, she could not say yet that she was meeting with the hanyou and his brother that evening or Kagome would insist on going with her, which would defeat the whole object.

Mama knew that Inuyasha was a different boy now to the brash urchin he had been in the days past and for both their sakes, Mama had to listen to what he wanted before he met Kagome again; or he might completely shy away. As Kagome calmed down Mama petted her, and although she knew that Kagome only wanted the rough boy who would try frantically to stop her tears with his ill considered words; she also knew that life would have been unfair to him to grant it.

Kagome's temper was still volatile and the girl although seventeen now was still quite immature emotionally; having not developed surrounded by others, all growing up together. Yet her eyes were much older and more intense than a young girl's should be. Mama reconsidered; what Kagome really wanted was stability and normality in her life and now the well was closed, she would make sure that her daughter got it.

Mama waited until Kagome had pulled herself together and felt hungry before mentioning that she had a meeting that evening to discuss extra tutoring for her; it may have seemed an irrelevancy but it would give the girl something else to think about. She was pleased to see the sparkle return, one of the girl's worries was that she would now be left behind in her own era as well, away from her friends in both worlds. Extra tuition had seemed like an impossibility given the cost; so this seemed like a minor miracle as far as Kagome was concerned.

It also took Kagome further into the realm of a normal life as she helped her mother to get ready for the evening. For Mama too this was almost overwhelming as they shared the mother/daughter relationship that had for the main been denied for so long. Having Kagome to help her choose what to wear and how to do her hair and make-up was good for both of them and they enjoyed themselves immensely.

Finally ten minutes before the car was due, Kagome pronounced her mother fit enough to go anywhere and the compliments were echoed by both Souta and Grandpa. Mama was relieved to see that all her family looked contented at the moment and felt that she could leave them all with a clear conscience and enjoy her evening out.

Sure enough promptly at seven o'clock the chauffeur arrived; causing Mama to smile to herself, she had already worked out that Sesshoumaru was a being that liked precision and accurate timing in any of the efficient aspects of his life. Then she wondered what it must have been like for him to have his routines disturbed as would surely have been inevitable with a small Inuyasha around; this thought actually making her laugh.

When Mama saw the lovely mansion that had been carefully hidden by gardens and a long drive behind a low wall and iron gates she was glad that she had made the effort to dress more formally. The house was low and built in a traditional style and although it was mainly white, it was neither stark nor unwelcoming. Lights shone everywhere throwing their gentle glow onto all the surfaces and into the gardens, illuminating and highlighting tasteful shrubs and statuary.

Inuyasha was waiting at the door to greet her and he too was dressed formally yet still managed to look comfortable; which made Mama feel nostalgic for when he found modern dress intolerable and had to wear a baseball cap to hide his ears. No such problem existed in his own home of course and he was stunning with his silver hair loose and draped over the midnight blue suit.

His ears were perked as she remembered and she cheekily reached up to give them a loving tweak to which he responded with a low growl and buried his head in her shoulder to give her better access. The almost seductive growl against her collar bone and his devastatingly good looks made Mama suddenly realise that Inuyasha had now become a mature male and was no longer the timid boy she had known and with that realisation came the need to protect.

She was now the mother who had suddenly seen with a shock that her son had become a man and she as a woman couldn't help but rejoice in Inuyasha's sheer masculinity; or feeling how good it was to be held in strong male arms again. When he had embraced her that morning she had not been aware of him so much, he had just been her boy returned.

Kagome though was now much younger than the hanyou and Mama knew without a shadow of a doubt that it was right not to encourage her to think romantically about him yet. Inuyasha stood up to look at Mama, although knowing he had not aroused her to desire him in any sexual way, he had noticed her increased heart rate and knew she understood. He spoke wryly and with a hint of sadness.

"Feh! I suppose you won't want to give me a hug anymore now that I'm all grown up."

"All children grow up Inuyasha; but they will always need a mother's love and care, even if they have become strong and handsome adults."

"Do not let the whelp fool you Lady Higurashi; he is only just becoming an adult in youkai terms but he is mature in human ones. Inuyasha is about the physical equivalent of a twenty five year old human; mentally though he is still younger." He smirked when he received a familiar glare for that insult.

"Lord Sesshoumaru, thank you for inviting me; you have a lovely home." Mama said before Inuyasha could make a dubious verbal reply to his brother's taunt.

"Perhaps you would like a tour after dinner? Inuyasha can show you around."

They all walked indoors and Sesshoumaru introduced Mama to his mate Hanataba. She of course, was also a beauty; another inuyoukai whose silver hair shone with a highlighting of rainbow colours in the light. She had a natural stripe of violet banding from the back of her neck that disappeared into her décolletage as well as over her eyes. She was also obviously pregnant; but Hanataba was gracious and came forward with a genuine smile.

"How nice to meet you at last Lady Higurashi, I have heard much from Inuyasha about you and your kindness to him. You have my thanks for all your care and concern for I too consider him as my son."

"I do not intend to tread on your toes where Inuyasha is concerned Lady Hanataba."

"Feh! Hanamama understands, Mama. Strange how things work out; I was inconsolable when I lost my real Mama, but now I have you two in her place. You both are very dear to me." Inuyasha said defusing a situation before it could develop. Both ladies smiled indulgently at him and then laughed together as each reached for his ears at the same time causing him to yelp loudly, about interfering women who wouldn't leave him alone.

"That was nicely done Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru praised quietly, as he caught up with his brother. Inuyasha sighed and leaned back on his brother's shoulder, then whispered;

"I hate jealousy Sesshpapa; it plagued my footsteps in my first lifetime, I don't want it to start to upset us in this one." His answer was a strong embrace and kiss from his brother which was as always reassuring to the pup. Soon they were at a spacious living area decorated in cream with warm accents of red and umber. Here, Shami was waiting and Mama could see how like Inuyasha she looked even in her unconcealed state.

Shami approached with a smile of welcome and took Mama's hands in her own and chuckled when Mama commented about her striking likeness to Inuyasha.

"I am the only one out of all of us that does look like Inuyasha, all the others have various facial markings and some have different shades of hair and eyes. The only thing he has that is different, are those lovely ears." She then made a grab for them as well, only to be batted out of the way by Inuyasha before he made a leap for one of the settees well away from female fingers.

"How many children do you and Lord Sesshoumaru have, Lady Hanataba; if it's not impolite to ask?"

"We have nine and this one on the way; six boys including Inuyasha and three girls. This one is also a girl."

"And to think I thought two was quite a handful."

"Well I must admit, we thought at first that one was going to be more than sufficient." She smiled at Mama's knowing grin;

" I can imagine what he was like as a young child; how old was he when you took him in?"

"About eight and that is the same whether youkai or human; he was at the age where he had not long been orphaned previously."

"I can hear you; for your information I was a model child, I'll have you know." Inuyasha sounded sulky but he was smiling, until he heard a _'humph' _from his brother which required him to launch himself at Sesshoumaru, pointlessly; as the youkai was far faster than him. While he was trying to catch Sesshoumaru, dinner was announced.

TBC


	3. An Evening Meal

Chapter Three An Evening Meal

Inuyasha escorted Mama into dinner as Sesshoumaru did Hanataba; Shami on the other hand was yanked towards the table by identical twin boys, her very slightly older brothers. She was rescued from being torn in two by an older Inu with hair like Hanataba. Inuyasha introduced him when he came over as his Uncle Kyouko; Hanamama's brother.

Kyouko bowed and went to settle the twins down for dinner with a swat to each behind before plonking them down in their chairs. It was the first time Mama had come across the reality of the difference between human and youkai development. The twins were obviously younger than Inuyasha although not by much, but in actual years they were all centuries older than she; even though they seemed much younger.

"My elder sons have joined us because despite actions to the contrary, they can behave in adult fashion and they will be sharing the teaching of Kagome's extra science lessons. Boys when you have quite finished; Lady Higurashi would be more impressed to leave her daughter's education in your hands, if you proved yourselves more responsible than you are doing at present."

Sesshoumaru's tone held reproof, a warning that the boys knew of old was not to be ignored and they immediately turned to Mama apologetically and introduced themselves as Kenshiki the firstborn and Koumyou his twin. Mama was laughing at them however, her eyes twinkling; she didn't mind their play as long as it didn't interfere with her daughter's education.

Dinner was exquisite without being made up of unfamiliar dishes and there was plenty of interesting talk before they settled down to discuss the true purpose of Mama's visit. The twins amused her very much as they often spoke as one person or finished off each other's sentences. Mama had heard of this happening before but never seen it in action; however this was their normal behaviour for every one else.

Soon it was time for information though and Sesshoumaru asked if Mama had any questions or worries about his offspring tutoring her daughter. Mama did not have any concerns per se but she did wish to know if it mattered to them that Kagome should know that they would be Inuyasha's siblings. They would all have the same surname and in any case she would probably be able to tell that they were youkai if she was in close proximity to them.

"To Kagome, my litter mates would appear as one person only and their auras are so similar that even Sesshpapa has a job telling them apart." Shami explained as Mama looked to her host smiling and bemused. He had a very wry smile.

"As my physical offspring naturally followed the adoption of my brother, they too picked up on his names for Hanataba and me."

"I think it good Lord Sesshoumaru that you allowed it and did not cause differences between your children; you must have a united family and great strength because of this."

"It has worked out that way indeed. My children all love and protect each other even if they do squabble at times."

"What siblings do not?" Mama laughed.

"But to address your question, it will not matter that they are found to be youkai, however perhaps if they used their mother's family name it would be better. The boys do not look so much like Inuyasha as does Shami."

"That may be as well, what shall we be calling you then?"

"They will be named Nishisaka for our purposes."

"May I see what you look like in your human forms? I find it so interesting."

No sooner were the words out of her mouth when the boys changed. They too had rings like Inuyasha which they wore and by turning the stone they could activate the charm. Now two human seeming twins stood before her; their hair was black as ebony, but completely short and straight. Inuyasha and Shami had a wave to theirs and where they had violet eyes; the twin's were dark chocolate in colour.

Then they changed again to blonde haired boys with blue eyes and they laughed at Mama's expression. Shami too became a blonde, her hair cascading down her back in waves and her eyes an intense blue. They explained that they could choose two different concealments because they were tied to their inherited youki, whereas Inuyasha had one as he had only one youkai parent. It was better for him to keep his own natural look as it disguised his time of vulnerability well.

"If I had to make a choice I would rather keep your natural youkai looks anyway, but other than that I prefer the dark version." Mama said, her eyes twinkling with good humour which was reciprocated by all around her. "So my daughter's tutors will be Miss Shiroinu, sister to Mr Shiroinu her soon to be history teacher and one of the Mr Nishisakas."

Mama shook her head, she was very concerned that Kagome would find out and accuse her mother of duplicity, trying to fool her and this was something that Mama would not do.

"I think you're worrying too much Mama. She will see me at school and so what if she knows who Shami is. They can talk as friends, I don't want to be a secret from her; but I can't be the Inuyasha she knew, not at the moment. For one thing I am older and will be her teacher, plus there are ethics to consider; no so called student/teacher relations allowed."

"I think we all feel that it's best if Kagome is allowed to grow up normally now Lady Higurashi. I remember all the time your daughter travelled with Inuyasha, I observed many of their interactions and just as Inuyasha needed and has had time to mature, so Kagome too has that same right."

"I will not lie to her."

"No, there will be no cause and besides soon she will be too busy to pine after one arrogant young pup."

"Oy, I don't seem to remember _I_ was the arrogant one."

"Then your memories are debatable Inuyasha. All we can do is see how things go for now."

This was the only solution and secretly Mama was pleased; Kagome would finish school well and perhaps even be able to go to college, a dream that had seemed to be getting further away from them.

"Inuyasha would you like to take Lady Higurashi on a tour of the estate; she may wish to speak to you privately." Sesshoumaru said so quietly that only his brother could hear him. The hanyou nodded and went to offer Mama the tour. For a while they were both silent as they walked around but it was comfortable and there was plenty for Mama to admire; not least the young man walking with her. Eventually when they reached the gardens Mama put her hand on his arm and made him turn to her.

"You are different Inuyasha; you are happy and well adjusted. I am very happy that it worked out for you; no one deserved their true wish on the jewel more than you did my son. But I want to ask you; this thing with your memories, do you truly remember or do you think them dreams?"

There was no immediate answer to her question; but once they came across a garden house full of hot house plants and a seat, Inuyasha let her sit and then kneeled in front of her taking both her hands in his own. Mama stared at his golden and expressive eyes as Inuyasha stared back, then she ran her hand gently down his head and smiled lovingly at him. He looked down and then back before saying;

"The memories are now back as they would be had I not been returned to childhood. All that is missing is the memory of pain. The anguish Sesshoumaru and Naraku caused me in my life does not hurt, although I remember; neither does any other hatred or discrimination I suffered. They are greatly muted because of my new life.

"The wish Midoriko granted me did not turn back the clock, my life had still been lived; but I just had the chance of knowing what it would be to have a loved childhood. Only I was changed and was given the physical body of an eight year old again, my memory locked until I had others to be prominent and take away the pain of the originals."

"I understand Inuyasha, but can I ask you a personal question?"

"Keh!"

"Do you remember your love of Kagome as a feeling anymore or just as a fact?" She sounded wistful and Inuyasha glanced askance at her, aware that she was not only asking about his feelings for Kagome. He gave her a dazzling smile and leaned forward to kiss her cheek.

"When I saw you again, my feelings were real; they came alive and I am not a liar, Sesshpapa would have my hide. I am still the same personality, just not so crude and insecure. But Kagome is still a young girl to me at the moment. I know that I loved her back then and I know that I hurt almost to death when she fell for Sesshoumaru, but I am now old enough to understand her better.

"I now know why her education was so important, I never used to understand back then; I was always afraid that she would go home and never come back to me. Her education was my bitter enemy and I never helped her with it or took her seriously. We'd argue all the time over the stupid books she brought; I was such a pup and so is she. No wonder my learned older brother seemed to be a knight in shining armour to her and was able to turn her head." He laughed self deprecatingly.

"But our personalities are right for each other or they will be given time; yes I still love her, but it's different now and I will wait till she is at least a woman before I make any overtures to her. Hell, she will probably find someone else anyway now she is back at school and I will have to let her."

"I don't think you will have worries on that score Inuyasha, but I'm afraid she is going to have a rough time of it until you deem her old enough."

"Mama, we will have to start again anyway if it is to work, besides Midoriko said that the true wish of Kagome's soul was to finish her education; as far as I am concerned she is entitled to that, just as I was to have my brother love and care for me." He did not mention that Sesshoumaru had already told him in no uncertain terms that he would be monitoring any relationship closely; no girl however much loved in the past, would cause his pup any more tears. Sesshpapa would have the final say and Inuyasha would heed his advice and abide by his 'father's' decision; but Mama need not know this.

"Thank you Inuyasha, you have grown wise as well as even more handsome." Mama enjoyed his furious blush and knew that her young hanyou was still very much the Inuyasha she'd known. Her hopes rose again that perhaps somewhere down the line, she would still get her puppy eared grandchildren.

"So what is happening right now in the past Inuyasha, do you remember?"

"Not much, it's a long time ago for me; nearly all my new life."

"Perhaps I might be able to elucidate for you My Lady. I was there when my nephew arrived, snoring in the arms of my future brother-in-law to their home in the West." It was Kyouko; who had just entered the garden room and he offered Mama the bloom of hibiscus he had plucked, appreciating the flush on her cheeks.

"Why, thank-you Lord Kyouko."

"I am no Lord, I'm just Kyouko. You on the other hand are the honourable mother of the Miko of legend; worthy of the title Lady." The flattery deepened her blush and his smile widened when Inuyasha butted in;

"I do not snore Uncle."

"We could not even see you as Sesshoumaru had you wrapped up in his tail, but we could all hear you. Now don't interrupt pup."

"Feh!"

"Now as I was saying, everyone was pleased to have their Lord come home even with his strange little group of Rin and Jaken, who everyone knew and the kitsune. Lord Inuyasha was not seen at first. But when the pup awoke everyone knew he was there; he started wailing in fear and wouldn't calm down until Sesshoumaru got his fangs round Inuyasha's neck."

"How does that reassure, I would think it would have the opposite effect?"

"Not for Inus, Sesshoumaru's growls made the pup feel safe. Inuyasha of course at that time was acting as if he was in the same mortal danger that he had been in when he was living at the Palace with his mother. Sesshoumaru announced to all that his brother was now to be considered his son; the pup was really only the subject of curiosity but he was overwhelmed and fearful nonetheless for a few weeks."

"Feh! Do you blame me?"

"No one blamed you Inuyasha, it was time for your brother to make amends and make sure you had the love you deserved. For the first week Sesshoumaru wouldn't put you down except to let you play in your own room or with Rin and Shippou and then the second week _you_ wouldn't let him put you down. Sesshoumaru had to stay until you were asleep and even then you would wake if he left and would wander round searching for him.

"Guards sent left and right looking for you because you didn't know your way around, although why Sesshoumaru was really worried when we could all hear you crying for him at the top of your voice. Secretly My Lady, it amused everyone to see Sesshoumaru going about his business as Lord with his tail permanently wrapped around Inuyasha awake or asleep on his shoulder."

"This isn't fair Uncle: I don't remember any of this."

"I think you do pup." Kyouko said gently. "The first time you slept without your Sesshpapa was when the first litter was born and you joined them and even then you fussed that your brother had left you and he felt just as bad."

"Telling all our family secrets Kyouko?" Asked a vastly amused, Sesshoumaru.

"Lady Higurashi was just wondering what was happening five hundred years ago."

"My life completely changed and my brother came home. I was able to right a terrible injustice and gain forgiveness, something I have never taken for granted since." His words were blatantly sincere and Mama felt privileged to hear him; she remembered all too clearly the despair of Inuyasha when he felt so hated by his only family.

To see him so happy and a part of the loving relationships surrounding him, watch as his brother embraced him, holding him close made her eyes water. Of course this was sensed by all her companions and Sesshoumaru recognising the cause changed tack.

"Mind you he was a nuisance a lot of the time; courting Hanataba with a small pup in tow was not the easiest thing to do. Inuyasha found it difficult, torn between jealousy over the time I spent with her or the fact that he already loved her as a Mama himself. Hanataba was extremely patient with us both and had always loved us both; she is a remarkable mate."

"Always loved you both...?"

"Yes Hanataba and Kyouto were part of the court in my father's days, there were many children of the Nobles at court as of course was I. She was most grieved when Inuyasha was sent away; she had helped Izayoi often with the pup until then. But enough of those times, the days are past and we are here to make the most of the future and the best outcome for both of our children."

With a final squeeze to his pup, Sesshoumaru offered his arm to Mama to take her back for a final cup of coffee before she went home. Mama left after thanking Hanataba once again for being the parent Inuyasha had needed and for the wonderful evening. Then she asked Inuyasha in a whisper whether or not she would see him again; they all missed him, not just Kagome. He assured her that he would visit.

Once again Sesshoumaru provided his car for her but this time, Kyouko offered to personally escort her to make sure she reached home safely. Mama gratefully accepted and smiled all the way home; her hibiscus blossom wrapped carefully in some moist tissue and foil, so that it should not spoil until she reached home.

TBC


	4. New Friends

Chapter Four New Friends

The next morning after Kagome and Souta had left for school, a large bouquet of flowers arrived for Mama. It was large but the blends were subtle and not ostentatious, and there were many hibiscus flowers to set the tone for the other blooms. A note attached simply said; _'Thank you for making the_ _evening more beautiful.' _Mama blushed like a school girl; she knew who had to have sent the flowers and the message, which although it sounded corny was she understood, genuinely meant.

Grandpa was thrilled that Mama had an admirer; but she just said that the flowers were from a fellow guest who only meant them as a thank you and because he was a gentleman. Mama didn't convince the old man however and he chuckled at her every time he saw the vase and bouquet; making her cheeks pink.

Of course when Kagome came back from school she saw the exotic blooms and stood staring starry eyed at her mother; her imagination just as lively as her Grandfather's. Mama explained once again that they were just a kindly token from an old fashioned, but proper gentleman. Nevertheless, for the rest of the week, Mama couldn't help but look at them and remember a handsome man with deep amber eyes and silver rainbow highlighted hair.

The week passed by quite quickly and Kagome was soon back into her routine at school and feeling more hopeful because of her promised extra lessons. This impetus made it seem more worthwhile to put the effort into all of her other topics and her teachers began to hope that Kagome had turned the corner in her health and could perhaps achieve something of her potential.

On Saturday morning, Kagome was up bright and early; Mama had got her a new desk and another chair so that she and her tutor would have room to work together. She had also invested in a laptop for her daughter and Kagome was aware of the expense; determined that she would not waste her mother's hard earned money by shirking.

When the doorbell rang she was ready, dressed smartly casual and with everything she could think of ready on her new desk. Kagome was nervous at meeting her tutor; apprehensive that the woman would think her such a dunce for her lack of knowledge. Mama opened the door to both Mr and Miss Shiroinu to her surprise, but she recovered quickly and offered tea to the guests.

Like Mama before her, Kagome was shocked at how like the human Inuyasha, Miss Shiroinu appeared; even though this time Shami had lifted her hair in a high braided plait. She was also going to be careful not to use her brother's favourite expressions 'Feh' and 'Keh'. The last thing she wanted to do was cause further distress in her pupil. Kagome took Shami up to the little study room that Mama had prepared for them while Sesshoumaru stayed downstairs with Mama to explain.

"It became evident to me that Kagome might also have questions that only I should answer Lady Higurashi. I apologise for my added intrusion."

"Please don't, it is no trouble to have you here and of course you are right; she will have questions once she feels the... youki, isn't it?"

"Correct." He then smiled slightly at her and said;"Kyouko is quite the keen gardener and has many cultivars to his credit. It is a civilised skill which gives pleasure to millions does it not?" He was pleased to see the blush; the more usual and disdainful smirk of his younger days replaced far more often now by a mischievous one. Having pups and watching their antics closely had made him understand his father much more.

It was not just Inuyasha who had the chance to know love by means of Midoriko's gift; Sesshoumaru had found it too, through his care of the boy and his own offspring. He had found aiding and abetting his pups throughout their lives to cause a general nuisance was wonderfully fulfilling; although he was never obviously so and was quite sneaky at times. Now he knew for certain that his father had done the same with him, something he had forgotten when he'd become so bitter.

"I didn't know how to send my Thank you." Mama said, her voice breaking through Sesshoumaru's thoughts.

"I do not mind taking a message." He smiled again at Mama's nod of thanks and watched her as she wrote a few lines on a pretty piece of paper. It was ironic, he thought; that he actually had more power than ever before since he had started to protect and not destroy. His increase in energy and youki surged if any of his own were in danger; father was right as always and he had just been an arrogant 'know it all' pup.

They both heard the girls coming back and Mama made her ubiquitous tea, the first of the visit; a plate of various assorted biscuits looking attractive and inviting adorned the table, alongside the cups and saucers. As they all sat to share the snack, Kagome looked puzzled and uncertain and as Sesshoumaru knew that her Miko abilities could detect the charms, he asked her about her concerns.

"I'm sorry, but you are really the Director for Education?"

"Yes Miss Higurashi. I have been responsible for the education and welfare of _all_ the children of this area for quite some number of years."

"Why do I get all this help then, how am I entitled to it? I know this seems strange but I can sense things and something feels wrong."

"What can you sense that is wrong."

"I am the Miko for this shrine Mr Shiroinu and I can tell you have a barrier around yourself and Miss Shiroinu. Please... are you youkai?"

"We are, is that a problem to you?"

"No certainly not...I knew some youkai once, can I see your youkai forms?"

"It would not be wise at this time; as for your other concern, your story is known to the higher youkai and we know of the real reasons for your lack of attendance at school. It was one of my duties to stop any investigations into your apparent lack of health."

"I often wondered about that and why no one seemed to check up on the doctors or someone."

"Because of your sacrifices of the time it was considered only fair that you should have help, if you ever returned permanently to your normal life." He watched her as she swallowed the tears that his words had brought close to the surface.

"Your aura is not completely clear to me but it does seem familiar; do I know you from my travels, have we met?"

"I am sure I would remember if I had ever come across you in the past Miss Higurashi; your little group had quite a notorious reputation and I believe your school uniform caused many comments." Sesshoumaru congratulated himself on the evasion, certain it had worked by turning her attention back on herself.

Kagome was satisfied with Mr Shiroinu's answers and relaxed, it made sense to her that youkai were still around, they lived long lives and the fact that they had disguises also made sense.

"Do you know and can you tell me about some of my friends from back then Mr Shiroinu; I would love to know if they are still alive and where and how they are and what they are doing?"

"As youkai are so long lived and relatively few in number, it has been beneficial to know one another. I know many youkai personally of course and now that it is known you are back here to stay I would think any of those whom you knew, would know too that they could visit you."

"Do you know Inuyasha, an inu-hanyou? Is he well?"

"Inuyasha, you mean the son of Lord Sesshoumaru; you travelled with his group of course?"

"They are brothers really."

"He is considered his son Miss Higurashi, by everyone who knows them; yes I know him and he is very well."

He had said the right thing, and Kagome's face brightened considerably as she thought of who else might still be around that she knew. Once they had chatted for a bit it was time for Kagome's first lesson and the two girls went upstairs leaving Mama and Sesshoumaru alone again. When he was certain nobody else was around, he gave her a small note.

It was from Kyouko and he was asking if she would like to go with him to a concert the following Saturday. He had two tickets but usually went unaccompanied to such places, this time he wondered if she would like to go with him. There was a phone number should she wish to take time to decide or she could let Sesshoumaru know.

"I feel quite the messenger boy at the moment."

"I'm sorry, that is hardly one of your duties as Lord of the West is it? I will phone him."

"I was jesting Lady Higurashi; it is no trouble to hand over a note or two. Kyouko is a good Inu, loyal to a fault and yet able to say what he thinks without fear. In my court he has always been a valuable asset and friend.

"He has no wife or...mate?"

"No one has caught his eye so far and he has never found the miss of companionship. But a word of warning; he will not play with your feelings as humans have a tendency to do, Inu are serious about their friendships however they end up. He says what he means with no hidden agenda; he would just like your company and has a spare ticket."

"That is reassuring; I would enjoy an evening out with a friend."

"It would be my pleasure to let him know you accept Lady Higurashi."

Kagome found that Miss Shiroinu had prepared the exact lessons that she had missed while in the past and the youkai was a patient and good teacher. Kagome learned more in a couple of hours one to one, than she would have learned in a class all day. This pleased her greatly and she began to truly hope that she could catch up by the end of the year.

Sesshoumaru was pleased at her work ethic; it was obvious that although Kagome had been greatly excited about the fact that he and Shami were youkai who knew her friends, she did not waste the time given and was able to get her priorities in the right order. To be fair to the girl, she always had worked hard on both sides of the well; he had seen her light on many nights far too late for a child of her years.

No one else knew that he had sometimes kept his sharp eyes on the Higurashi shrine; it was his private business. He had made sure it was protected down through the centuries by always owning the land it was built on and he knew the day that Kagome had first fallen down the well and freed his brother. He had watched the young couple and their tumultuous relationship develop away from the dangers of the past, and had seen Inuyasha's awkward ways; feeling regret all over again that the boy had been so insecure.

They had been such young pups; of course Kagome still was but Inuyasha wasn't really that much older even now, but still the difference was far more obvious in him. Sesshoumaru sighed; it was evident that their chemistry was matched, they had needed each other back in the past and they would need each other in the future.

Inuyasha had not yet been re- awakened to his feelings of the memories he carried of Kagome; but that would change once he started to talk and interact with the girl. Sesshoumaru shook his head gently; he could not see the path ahead of course but he could make an educated guess, that should mother and daughter be courting at the same time, the mother's relationship would be more conventional and smooth.

However those were days a parent had to be prepared for, the days of pups growing up and reaching out on their own. It was part of a parent's duty and responsibility to be around to mop up the spilled tears and hand out advice, however old the pup. Apart from all the usual milestones of childhood development, several of his pups had taken the first steps of adulthood; the older ones all had good careers and were trustworthy, accomplished and well thought of in their communities.

Inuyasha was no exception to this; he had worked hard and had a natural talent for teaching and inspiring his pupils, being popular but not tolerating misbehaviour. He was lively and interesting and nobody wished to be turned away from his lessons and he was well used to young ladies finding him attractive. He knew how to deal with unwanted attention.

Now Sesshoumaru thought of how his first litter of pups was going to help the girl who had sacrificed a lot of herself for a cause she only stumbled into; but that would for ever make him grateful, because she had indirectly united him with his brother and helped him to understand his father. The Daiyoukai could even admit to finding her remarkable considering how very young she was at the time.

Not that that would have any bearing on his decisions if she started to upset his pup again, Inuyasha may not have remembered all the details yet of his previous lifetime but Sesshoumaru's memory had never been altered. He still recalled with loathing the time he'd found Inuyasha baring his throat in submission to him when the pup thought that Kagome had chosen his brother.

Seeing Inuyasha give in and with no fight left had shocked Sesshoumaru to the core and shown him his brother's weakness more fully than anything else ever had. He remembered causing his brother great pain and suffering during his lifetime, he had seen the pup often in tears of his and others causing; but he had never been defeated in spirit even if beaten in body.

Betrayal was his downfall; each time was a direct blow to his heart, causing him to doubt himself and his ability to judge and leaving him wide open to believing all the hateful things said to him. His active mind was always able to supply the reasons why nobody could ever care for him; supplied from the extensive vocabulary he had acquired from those who despised him or his existence.

Betrayal of death by his parents, of blood by his brother and of love by his Mikos; in Inuyasha's short life it was enough for him to wish for oblivion and he had been willing to let Sesshoumaru take it. But the Youkai had been appalled at the idea; it would have been murder and at no time had he ever considered killing his brother by those means, a fair fight was different.

But now such thought at all made Sesshoumaru blanch, he had realised how precious his brother's life was and had nurtured him through their second chance together and anyone causing deliberate pain to Inuyasha or any of his siblings would face the severe consequences. This brought him back to his original thought though, and he knew there would be ups and downs in adjustment for both Inuyasha and Kagome if they were to ever have a future together.

During the week, Kagome met Mr Nishisaka and Miss Shiroinu for her evening lessons as well as the ones on Saturday; she enjoyed the lessons and they in turn found her a pleasure to teach. Shami started to like the girl for herself and not just her history and possible importance to her brother; she was fun and polite but not boring, but she had missed out on many girl things. Shami asked Sesshoumaru whether or not it would be wise to make her a friend.

He saw no harm in it; after all they were not trying to hide from the Miko and she would soon enough be meeting Inuyasha, but Shami was concerned that things might move too fast. However they could not cover every aspect and life would have to fall in place eventually; being friends with an old boyfriend's sister was something girls had to deal with every day.

Kagome of course had not yet seen Shami unconcealed but that didn't matter too much and it had been nice to go to the mall on Saturday afternoon with the youkai and have fun buying makeup and clothes. Kagome was still getting used to having time to consistently be with her old friends as well, but she found that she had grown away from them slightly so it was nice to have Shami who bridged the gap between them and the need for more mature company.

Fighting for her life had left an indelible impression on the young girl and her knowledge that she hadn't imagined all of her time through the well and that youkai existed was personified in Shami at the moment and was a closer link than she knew to her hanyou. At the moment they were looking for a present to give to Mama; Kagome favoured a necklace to go with the dress that she was going to wear to the concert with Kyouko.

Kagome was also determined to sit her mother down on Sunday and find out everything about the mysterious Kyouko. All that Mama had said was that he was a gentleman and very pleasant to talk to that she had met around at Mr Shiroinu's house the other evening. This had set Kagome's mind working overtime; was Kyouko human or youkai? Mama had just smiled at her enigmatically and refused to say anymore.

Mama looked lovely for her evening out and she introduced Kyouko to her family when he came to collect her. Obviously Kagome could tell that the middle aged, slightly grey and tall man was a youkai in disguise as she could pick up the barrier; but his twinkling eyes were full of amusement as she tried unsuccessfully to guess what he really looked like. Kyouko then offered Mama a corsage of a single Hibiscus in a shade of white she had never seen, but that reminded her of his true colouring.

Mama's blush made Kagome smile and more determined to find out more the next day; but her plans were thwarted when after breakfast, she had a special visitor herself. Although she couldn't see through the concealment, the young man who stood at the door was very familiar to her; his eyes filled with tears as he took her in his arms and whimpered 'Kagome' as he snuffled her hair.

TBC


	5. First Visitors

Chapter 5 First Visitors

Deactivating his charm the youkai revealed his aura and changed to the being Kagome knew so well;

"Shippou" she said softly as she put her arms around the shaking kitsune. Shippou soon pulled himself together and stood in front of her smiling. He had changed very little really, he was obviously much taller but she would never mistake those emerald eyes with any others. He was very handsome now; his long hair and tail a rich russet shot through with crimson and gold. Shippou wiped his eyes, and turned to his other companion.

He smiled and beckoned the girl forward and with another squeal, Kagome recognised Rin; they were delighted to see each other and soon Mama came to invite the couple to dinner. With the arrival of these two friends from the past, Kagome quite forgot the interrogation of her mother for which Mama was grateful. She had had a wonderful evening, Kyouko had taken her to a meal before the concert and was very good company.

He had not overwhelmed her in any way, but had made it clear that she too was very pleasant to be with and he would like to see her again. Mama had not hesitated to say yes; she would be able to make sure that nothing happened too fast, Kyouko was just as Sesshoumaru described although she would have to find out more about Inuyoukai to make sure she didn't lead_ him_ astray.

Meanwhile Kagome had dragged her guests into the living room and was asking questions so quickly that it was impossible to answer her; so they waited until she ran out of breath. How young she seemed to them now, even Shippou; especially Shippou, who remembered her just like this but who was now older in mind and body than Inuyasha if only by a relatively few years.

But those years rolled back the longer she spoke and she was the same girl that he had waited so long to see. She made him smile again and feel great love for her; so much so that he hugged her tightly and asked her to listen to them if she wanted any answers. Rin was grinning at the reunion and then Shippou fully introduced her as his mate. That shocked Kagome; not only was Shippou, her baby, old enough to have a mate but that Sesshoumaru had agreed to him having Rin.

Once they had all calmed down and been introduced to Mama properly, Kagome and her mother wished to hear of life after the well closed. Kagome especially wanted to know of Sango and Miroku and Kaede before she started on Shippou and Inuyasha. Where to start, when there was so much to say? Rin suggested the beginning was a good place making Mama smile at her wisdom and then blush when she realised that Rin although human was a good deal older than her.

"How's Inuyasha, Shippou? Was Sesshoumaru kind to him; did he treat him like his little brother properly? You'll tell me the truth won't you?" The seriousness with which she asked the question stopped any flippancy from the kitsune. At one time Rin would have been angry at the hidden slur on her beloved Lord, but she remembered that it was Sesshoumaru of five hundred years ago that Kagome had known for the last couple of years.

"Sesshoumaru was kind to him and all of us Kagome, but you will be able to ask Inuyasha yourself soon; I think he is going to come and visit this week. Sesshoumaru thought it better that you met before you see him in the classroom." Shippou was a bit vague and Kagome was left wondering why it seemed so clandestine; did Inuyasha have to ask permission to visit her, was Sesshoumaru keeping his brother subdued and having to be obedient in order to keep his home? One thing was for certain, she would get to the bottom of the mystery.

She put the feeling of great excitement at the thought of seeing her hanyou to the back of her mind for the moment, because she wanted to give all her attention to Shippou for now. For the rest of the afternoon, Shippou and Rin told them as much as they could about Miroku and Sango and the villages.

The couple were fairly frequent visitors to the West as although they were celebrities and intent on restoring the slayer's village; they didn't want to lose their contact with Inuyasha and Shippou. The little hanyou may not have recognised that he knew them; but he did come to know Aunt Sango and Uncle Miroku who came and told such great stories on rainy afternoons.

Inuyasha liked to play with their children but wouldn't go near them when they were babies as he'd had a bad fright. One time he had gone in to the nursery and looked at the baby asleep and patted its hair thinking it was so tiny and soft, but the child had awoken and started to yell. Sango and Miroku had gone to settle their son again only to find Inuyasha curled up in the corner of the room with his arms over his head, shaking in fear.

Sango gave the baby to his father and went over to the frightened pup who was whimpering that he hadn't hurt the baby over and over. As she reached to touch him though, Inuyasha flinched back and down even further and Sango realised with sadness that the child was expecting a blow or worse. Miroku came over carrying the baby and knelt down next to Inuyasha and spoke in his low gentle voice telling him that the baby was fine; he had just awoken needing a change.

But Inuyasha did not even notice them; he kept up the whimpering until Hanataba lifted him into her arms and nipped at his nose to make him stop, but it had taken several minutes before he could be made to look round and see that nobody was angry or going to hurt him. Inuyasha had been brought back to smiles but he wouldn't go near any babies on his own again.

That brought questions from Kagome about who Hanataba was and the explanation that she was Sesshoumaru's mate. Was she nice and kind, or did she too hate hanyou and just put up with Inuyasha? Shippou assured her that she had been just like a mother to her mate's young brother and that Inuyasha loved her.

They, including Sesshoumaru also frequented Kaede's village; giving the area protection by just the visits and leaving their scent in the area was enough to deter any who might wish to take advantage. As Inuyasha was no longer able to do this on his own and in gratitude for Kaede's kindnesses to his brother; Sesshoumaru gave her village and the slayer's village his patronage.

Kaede's had been a source of happiness for the three small children for a long time until she died; they loved the freedom of running around and playing in the forest and the elderly lady herself always had a few treats tucked away somewhere for after dinnertime. Inuyasha often fell asleep in her arms, as she had a soft spot for the pup and never minded his fascination with her eye patch. She even let him try it out sometimes.

Kaede too was human and smelt vaguely familiar; like his mother, in a way that was soothing and she had a pleasant way of humming pup songs when he was tired. Sesshoumaru or Hanataba would eventually take the sleeping children back home after having had a welcome break from the three whilst they were visiting Kaede.

Sango and Miroku had both lived well into their eighties and had been healthy for most of those years. They had left many descendents who populated the local area before spreading out and who were ancestors to both of Kagome's parents and therefore to Kagome and Souta. Shippou had seen them all and had also kept an eye on the youngsters as they grew on the shrine; he too had been there on the day that Kagome fell down the well; rejoicing that it would not be long before he would see her properly again.

Shippou and Rin stayed for dinner that evening, Souta and Grandpa too were amazed to see these friends of Kagome from the past. Tales of those days were told and Mama found out just how much Kagome had done and how much danger she had been in all that time; making her very grateful that her child had come home and was finished with all that now.

Kagome though also wanted to know about Shippou's life at the Western Palace; she could see that he was well adjusted and happy along with Rin so he must have been cared for. She wanted to know all that he could tell her and the next round of stories was all about his life in the lands of Inuyoukai.

He had all but been adopted by the kitsune clan that worked in the Palace; with permission from Sesshoumaru, the clan had taken over responsibility for Shippou, training him in his natural arts. But he also was given a tutor alongside Rin and Inuyasha and so much of his day was spent with people he knew and because the class was only the three of them, they all prospered.

Mama hinted that with those three she was sure that mischief was never far away, and she couldn't help but smile at the identical grins she got back from the couple. Of course they had been playful and enjoyed pranking everyone that they could and yes, they suffered the consequences more than once but it never stopped them for long. In other words they had a normal childhood; Shippou said smugly.

Had Inuyasha joined in? Kagome could imagine he was a right pest, disrupting the classes or carrying on a joke too far; she suspected, knowing him that he was an unruly boy, probably making Sesshoumaru pull his hair out which would serve him right she thought nastily. Shippou watched her knowingly and smirked.

"Actually he was very good; toddling around after us, don't forget he was younger than either Rin or me. He looked so innocent too, that he was great for causing problems. We'd ask him to do something but not tell him why and no one believed that he was up to no good. Do you remember the peaches Rin?"

"How could I forget? We asked Inuyasha to jump us into a huge peach tree where all three of us dropped ripe peaches on passersby. Not all the time mind you, one or two direct hits; every now and then over a week. It took Sesshoumaru ages to work out that it was us and that was mainly because Jaken seemed to get it the most."

"It was the only time we did it though."

"Yes, that was the only time Sesshoumaru ever punished me himself and I never wanted a repeat; I couldn't sit down all afternoon." Rin still looked saddened by the memory but Kagome jumped to the wrong conclusion.

"He whipped you all; for peaches?" She said aghast.

"No, we got a spanking that's all; but usually our nurse was the one to punish us...I felt that I had really let Sesshoumaru down and that was worse than the physical pain."

"Oh, I don't know; he has a heavy hand Rin." Shippou remembered ruefully. "Not only that, he did it where everyone could see, right under the tree; me first, then Rin."

"Not Inuyasha?"

"No, the little weed was already crying and shaking watching us get it; besides Sesshoumaru said that Inuyasha obviously appreciated the reason why what we had done was wrong."

"You see Kagome, the tree was planted by the Inu no Taisho and its fruit was a boon to any locals especially children who were needy. Every year any one can come and take its fruit, as much as they can carry at a time and we were wasting it; taking it from hungry mouths. Of course that reasoning was something Inuyasha could truly appreciate and Sesshoumaru's stern rebuke was enough for him."

"Sesshoumaru doesn't seem the sort who would care if people starved or not and I thought that the whole idea of Inuyasha being young again was for a fresh start not to be reminded of his past and intimidated into being a shadow of his former self." Kagome's anger was real but this time it was Shippou who corrected her.

"You are not understanding Kagome, Sesshoumaru was explaining to the two of us the importance of the tree and why we needed discipline. Surely you do not advocate letting children get away with wrongdoing?"

"No, but it seems wrong somehow; Inuyasha was never the meek little thing you have said he was."

"Well he wasn't, not all the time but he is happy; isn't that what you wanted?" Rin's tone was sharp.

"Of course I wanted that and having a home is better than being left to starve alone like he was the first time. So long as his brother provided for him he had to be better off."

"Kagome, you are judging someone who you knew very briefly; true he was not kindly and had been aggressive, but you do not know the real youkai he is and became. I am sure Inuyasha will tell you more about his upbringing."

"I'm sorry Rin, I know he was kind to you against all we knew of him...its just I miss Inuyasha and I was afraid for him." Kagome looked lost and Rin came and put an arm around her shoulders giving her a hug. She understood, remembering the times when she had been a child and the brothers had fought frequently.

Late that evening, the guests got up to go with promises to visit often and an invite for the family to spend a day with them at their home to meet their own kits. That brought another squeal; Shippou had kits already which brought about a shame faced confession that the kitsune had been older than she first thought. So when Inuyasha was taken back to eight years old that was the same as in human years; but Shippou had been nearer fifty which although much older than the hanyou, was still very young in youkai years.

"Yeah, it's me that calls him runt now."

"Only if Sesshoumaru can't hear you." Rin grinned; receiving a grin and a nod back from her mate. Kagome felt a bit better, they sounded as though they had grown up happily so there was no reason for her to suppose that Inuyasha would have been any different. Rin linked her arm through Kagome's as they started to walk to the car.

"I'll tell you a last story to ease your mind Kagome. About three weeks after we made our permanent home with Lord Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha felt comfortable enough to let his brother out of his sight for a few minutes. Until then he was with him all day and night, usually tucked into Sesshoumaru's tail. This day however, he was in the study on his own and keeping a low profile because he had turned human.

"Then he had obviously spotted the inks on the desk and being a curious pup he had to look and mess about. Inuyasha painted stripes on his arms and face and a moon like Sesshoumaru's with the ink and used up lots of paper making pictures. Unfortunately Jaken came in and started raving about the expense and waste, he didn't recognise Inuyasha and thought him a servant's child. He promised Inuyasha that he would be beaten for his disrespect of the master.

"Of course Inuyasha was scared and ran. When Sesshoumaru was looking for his brother and couldn't find him, everyone was called out from what they were doing to search. What nobody realised at the time was that the child Jaken had scared was Inuyasha; his transformation had happened while he was unwatched, so we were looking for a hanyou while we should have been hunting for a human. The Inus all used scent rather than sight and they were confused.

"It didn't take long for Sesshoumaru to work it out though; but then Inuyasha was still not able to be found, even though they were looking for the right scent. Sesshoumaru was very worried, the scent had fear attached and he knew that Inuyasha wouldn't give his hiding place away especially as a human.

"Shippou found him actually, hiding in the rubbish heap behind the outhouses of the garden. The rubbish hid his scent; Inuyasha told us later that an old youkai had suggested to him if he ever had need to hide, find the strongest smelling thing around to hide in. It took Sesshoumaru over an hour to coax his brother out of the mess.

"He got down on his knees to his brother's height and spoke softly, promising that he was not in trouble and no one was going to beat him or punish him in any way. When Inuyasha finally came out he was beyond filthy, but Sesshoumaru hugged and kissed him before wrapping him in his tail again making him safe.

"He didn't have to do any of that Kagome, he could have asked anyone else there to remove the boy and bathe him before bringing him to his study, but he didn't. He made his brother feel so safe that Inuyasha was proudly showing off his painted markings. Then when Inuyasha started to wail because a bath would remove his marks, Sesshoumaru promised that he would paint them on the pup again the next day; but he had to be clean for bedtime."

By now Kagome had tears running down her face again;

"I wish I'd been there, I missed so much." She didn't notice Rin's soft smile and certainly didn't hear her thoughts that were pleased that Kagome hadn't been around. Inuyasha had needed only his brother and a proper upbringing.

TBC


	6. Reunion

Chapter 6 Reunion

Once again Kagome had a full week of education followed by her extra lessons and by now she had worked out that there was something strange about Mr Nishisaka and eventually they gave in and both turned up for her lessons. They made her laugh and she was coming on in leaps and bounds now that her studies were uninterrupted. The reports that reached Sesshoumaru about Kagome were all good; she was hard working and productive.

Mama had received a couple of notes and another bouquet of flowers from Kyouko but that was all for now. They agreed that while Kagome was working so hard and until she had settled down about Inuyasha, there was not enough spare time in the immediate future for Mama to go and leave her children too often.

But if Mama could not go out in the evenings because she was needed at home, it didn't stop Kyouko from personally delivering the flowers or from popping in for a cup of coffee during the day. Besides if the youkai was in the general area and it was lunchtime, it seemed very natural for him to ask Mama to join him in a local restaurant.

Mama found it extremely relaxing to be able to talk and smile with another adult about anything at all. A person who was amusing and informative, who also was a good listener, was a valuable friend and if Mama wanted to develop the relationship in the future Kyouko would also be willing. He also held valuable insight that he could share with her that could help Kagome; having also lived within the Western Palace.

Mama was pleased that Inuyasha would turn up soon so that everyone's world could move forward; he was the missing piece of the jigsaw as far as they were all concerned. She didn't like all the secrecy surrounding them all; the longer it went on, the more likely someone was going to get hurt. But there was nothing to be done; the two main characters of the drama had to sort this out for themselves and so it was that Inuyasha arranged to come to the Higurashi shrine on Saturday afternoon.

Kagome was so nervous that she couldn't concentrate on her maths so Shami let her off early that morning. She of course, knew why the girl was distracted and she too was glad that her brother was going to sort things out soon. Kagome didn't know why she was so restless, it was true that she hadn't seen him in for a while but then the answer came to her. The last time they had spoken as their normal selves there had been the unresolved issue of her indiscretion with Sesshoumaru.

Her apprehension grew until she couldn't eat her lunch and had gone through her entire wardrobe wondering what to wear, not being happy with any combination. She finally settled for a blue skirt with paler blue top; or at least that was the latest thing she had tried, when she heard his familiar voice at the door.

She heard her mother's pleased welcome and Souta who was still young enough to be able to jump up and down in pleasure that his 'big dog brother' had returned. Even Grandfather was pleased that Inuyasha had returned to them. Kagome however seemed frozen to the spot at the top of the stairs until she was aware that they had all gone into the kitchen. That seemed to free her legs and she crept down to go to peep into the kitchen. As she peered around the corner she found herself staring into the golden eyes she had so missed and the smirk that went with them.

"Well wench, don't I get a hug?"

"Inuyasha, oh my Inuyasha; I have missed you so much." She launched herself into his welcoming arms and for a few blissful minutes she was held close; her tears soaking into his shoulder while for him, his memories of her gained their vibrancy and he too was lost in her almost forgotten scent. It reassured him of her genuine love and filled a space in his heart that he hadn't realised until that moment was empty.

Mama came over to them and put her arms around them both, her own tears obvious as she felt her family was once again complete with their joyful reunion. She knew of course that things weren't going to be the same, nor did she wish them to be; but for now, this moment, everything was fine. Inuyasha pulled away and placed his arm round each of them and kissed their foreheads before they sat down for a cup of tea.

Kagome noticed the bunches of flowers that Inuyasha had brought for her and Mama, remarking on how lovely they were before going to find vases. Inuyasha just grinned and said he'd picked them himself, from a certain greenhouse he knew; winking at Mama as he did so, then his face positively lit up happily when he saw her blush.

Later after the excitement of Inuyasha's return had eased, he spoke to Mama who nodded and then asked Kagome to come and talk with him. Leading her upstairs to her room, Inuyasha smiled reassuringly at Kagome and closed the door. She was not bothered, having never been afraid of the hanyou, and besides she trusted him completely.

He knew this and his heart swelled with renewed fondness for her when he saw the love shining in her eyes. It made him sad for a minute that he couldn't go along with her desires at the moment. Inuyasha understood that Kagome wanted to pick up from just before they met Sesshoumaru in the past, but it was not possible. He had changed and grown; now it was her turn, but she wouldn't see it at first and it was going to be hard for her.

He sat down on the bed and pulled her into his lap, tucking his jean clad legs under her and reining in his power so that she wouldn't feel intimidated by his more adult aura. Kagome leaned back into his embrace and was happy to just sit there for a while; but her own honesty wouldn't allow her to accept his comfort until they discussed their last but one meeting. Inuyasha could feel the embarrassment and unease coming from Kagome and pulled her closer.

"Inuyasha...I..."

"It's O.K. Kagome; I understand what happened back then, probably better than you do."

"How can you, when I couldn't even answer you." She sounded such a child Inuyasha thought fondly, and he smiled where he knew that she couldn't see him.

"Sesshoumaru helped me understand. He told me that I had also done the same thing in a way."

"That's ridiculous Inuyasha."

"Is it? You were manoeuvred to create that Sesshoumaru puppet into an ideal that you wanted. You knew the real Sesshoumaru was older and far more educated than a pitiful orphan hanyou, your subconscious just projected that it would be nice for someone to understand your difficulties and desires for learning. Then it just got carried away and...Well, I know that women find him attractive.

In the same way, I made him fit what I wanted; eventually he became the teasing older brother who would take responsibility from me and look after me for once. But me, I eventually projected what I thought he would really be like and ended up with him reviling and hurting me."

"Oh Inuyasha, do you know now that I didn't really want him? I don't know what happened; I had never thought of Sesshoumaru like that before, it just seemed to happen out of the blue."

"I know Kagome, but I also know that it showed up what you truly wanted and that would not have been me at the time. Now don't interrupt...We would have ended up a tragic pair. I could never have been supportive of you in the way you desired, I never understood your need for education, it scared me and I was very aware of being inferior to it.

You were maturing far faster than I was by nature and you would have wanted a life I couldn't provide. We would have ended up resenting and blaming each other for our lack of harmony, and I _know_ that my temper would never have improved and you would be left feeling that you had not been fulfilled in your life."

"Inuyasha no, it would not be like that."

"If you are as honest with yourself as I know you are; you will realise that I am right."

"You mean Sesshoumaru is right, it is him who has said this isn't it?"

"The point is still valid, whoever said it." There was silence between them for a while, until Kagome said in a voice that proved she was fighting breaking down.

"Do you know how much it hurt to see him take you away from me? You didn't remember me at all, I was nothing to you; you didn't even remember my name. You were so tiny Inuyasha and you left me to go with _him_; leaving me only with the memory of your warm baby breath on my neck."

"You sound like you hate my brother Kagome; I couldn't come with you once I'd been changed."

"I know, but why did you have to change, I love you; you should have come with me, why become a pup again and live with someone who had hated you so much?"

"I didn't know what Midoriko had planned for me and she spoke of everyone's deepest hopes including Sesshoumaru's. He wanted me Kagome; he wanted me, can you understand what that has meant for me?" His tone had taken on a pleading quality but Kagome was too distressed to hear it.

"No, I don't know; all I do know is that you are not the same anymore, he has brainwashed you and goodness knows what else. Tell me truthfully Inuyasha, does he hurt you? I know others have said how kind he is, but can he really have changed or does he harm you when no one else can see? What is he holding over you? Is it your home, you know you can live here?"

Inuyasha was horrified by her accusations and tried to see down to the real concern she had and not react as if he was back in the feudal era. He tried to ignore her tears which still had power over him.

"Kagome of course I have changed, I am older for a start and I have had a proper upbringing. Please do not malign my brother; he does not deserve any censure, he has been a father to me." He was worried at the way Kagome was shaking her head.

"You knew no better Inuyasha; I'll bet that he did the minimum for you just to ease his conscience...he took you away from me just to show he could give you a home and shelter but what about love, does he love you Inuyasha? I know he doesn't, he is incapable."

"I'll not discuss this anymore Kagome; you are not in the frame of mind that will accept what has happened."

"No, I'm not; I'm not the one who is delusional, if you still wore the rosary, I'd sit you until you agreed to stay here." She was openly crying now, but Inuyasha still was not always the wisest of people when it came to keeping his mouth shut.

"If you tried to put it back, Sesshpapa would never let you see me again."

"Sesshpapa; _Sesshpapa_, you mean _Sesshoumaru_? He still can tell you what to do? I knew he was controlling you. The Inuyasha I knew would have told his stuck up arrogant brother where to go, in no uncertain terms."

Inuyasha didn't answer this tirade; he felt drained. He knew she would have difficulty in accepting the truth but he had not realised how hurt she had felt, but he did recognise that it was pain that was talking. But that did not stop it hurting him either, however he still had to speak about school and her future and that meant calming down.

"Kagome, it doesn't matter what you think of Sesshoumaru and how he brought me up, what does matter is that _you_ have the right to grow up and go to school. To that end, I am going to step back out of your social life at least until you finish school and then perhaps we'll see. As of Monday next, I'll just be your teacher leaving you free. I still love you but it is different, I care greatly for you and maybe in the future..."

"You can't mean it Inuyasha, I have to see you."

"I'll be around and I promised your family that I would still see them, but we cannot have any other relationship; I am your teacher, you my student. Who knows, you may decide you like Hojo better than me anyway." He tried to laugh but it was strained and fell flat. She was just crying and he held her rocking slightly.

"Sorry for being rude Inuyasha. I missed you so, so much." She whispered as he nodded, breathing heavily through the emotion. At this point Mama came in with sandwiches and tea for them both and she looked sympathetically at Inuyasha letting him know that she understood. She stayed with them until Kagome was able to come downstairs for a final coffee before Inuyasha left to go home.

By the time he did get home, the hanyou was exhausted; physically and emotionally. This was partly because he was upset; but also because his memories of Kagome had started to become real again. It had happened before and was always a disconcerting experience; taking some time to assimilate. Instinctively he did what he always did when he was in need of reassurance and he made his way to his parent's suite.

The door opened to him and he rushed in to kneel by his Hanamama, laying his head in her lap; where she calmed him by stroking his hair and petting his ears. He was silent while trying to sort out all the new sensations and control his anger; but he couldn't help the small whimpers and dry sobs that escaped him.

Sesshoumaru came over with a large glass of red wine he had been warming in his hands since Inuyasha came in. This was not the first time by a long way that the whelp had needed them in such fashion.

"So pup, when do you move out and leave the cruelties of your brother for the safety of your Kagome?" Sesshoumaru smiled at the predictability of Inuyasha, as his head shot up to glare at his brother."Come Inuyasha, do you want to tell us what happened?" He frowned slightly when Inuyasha shook his head.

"I take it that she did not respond well and that I am the greatest villain that has ever lived, who has kept you in chains and beaten you every day."

"How would you guess all that Sesshpapa? She was upset and angry but she had such horrid ideas and..."

"It is not too hard to take an educated guess at what has caused your disquiet Inuyasha."

"Tell us pup; we do understand you know." Hanataba kissed him. But he did tell them, he told them everything; although he got upset when he repeated some of the girl's assertions about Sesshoumaru. The youkai sighed; this was the major difference between Inuyasha and his siblings or surrogate parents, his human heart.

It had taken many years for Sesshoumaru and Hanataba to understand that Inuyasha did not always react in the same way as a full youkai and that the reason was because he felt things slightly differently. Mistakes had been made certainly, but these had been rectified over time; as was normal with all families. Sesshoumaru knew Inuyasha was feeling bad over Kagome's words but he had expected them.

Leaning forward and over his pup, Sesshoumaru ruffled his brother's hair. Inuyasha stood and put his arms round Sesshoumaru's waist and rested his head on his brother's chest.

"Inuyasha, do not let Kagome's words upset you so much; they have no effect on myself."

"I know, but it hurts me if you or Hanamama are slighted; you have done so much for me, both of you..."

"There is no need for tears pup; the girl's reaction is understandable; as far as she is concerned at least, she cares greatly for you and do not forget, she only has her knowledge of our regrettable past to base her opinions on. I bear her no grudge for her love for you; she has only ever wanted your happiness Little One."

He wiped Inuyasha's face and got him to smile again; thinking again how important it was to remember Inuyasha's humanity. To the youkai he was truthfully uncaring of how anybody saw him; what mattered was his real actions not his imagined ones. His feelings did not get hurt in the same way his brother's did. Sometimes it was hard to see what was affecting the hanyou, but Sesshoumaru no longer denied that things did.

"Inuyasha, there are some things that only time will reveal; as far as Kagome is aware, I took you away from her to who knows what end. She is a child; she will learn the truth one day. I know that Shippou told her stories about your pup hood, I am sure that others will do the same." With that threat he smiled at Inuyasha's rueful grin and then told him to go to bed.

TBC


	7. Home Truths

Chapter Seven Home Truths

Sunday in both households passed by relatively peacefully; with both Inuyasha and Kagome too drained to contribute much. Of course everyone knew why Inuyasha was quiet and his siblings were verbally protective on his behalf; but as Sesshoumaru remarked to Shami, the Miko was known to be volatile when upset. Inuyasha was certainly no stranger to the anger that blew up like a storm yet passed over just as quickly. 

Besides he was over the main upset now; it was just the memories finding their rightful places in his brain that was tiring him. Inuyasha took his mind of what was happening in it by preparing his lessons for the next day; it was not just Kagome's year that he was going to teach, but a couple of the younger ones as well.

Kagome too was preparing for the lessons on the next day, she would show Inuyasha that he could not just ignore her or put her in position of student only. She knew he still loved her even if Sesshoumaru was trying to put him off; she would thwart the Daiyoukai's plans for his brother and release Inuyasha from his influence.

But she was not prepared as well as she thought; on Monday morning she reached school only to hear lots of whispers about the hot new mystery teacher. It had to be Inuyasha they were all whispering about; there wouldn't be two who fit the description with the long black hair and violet eyes surely? Then by dinner time, the whole canteen was buzzing with more talk about him; fuelled by those who had already been in his lessons.

It was killing Kagome to know that everyone else seemed to think that Inuyasha was the next best thing since sliced bread. It was not just his looks, but his personality and how much fun his lessons were that was being so avidly spoken about. The younger children especially were excited as he had got them to act out small vignettes, expressing certain aspects of social life in the past.

Inuyasha was to take the double lesson after lunch for Kagome's year group and his fame preceded him as the class was already eager and awaiting his arrival; sitting down with their books out. Inuyasha was formally introduced by the headmaster and as his name was mentioned he glanced across at Kagome who was looking stunned.

"...Mr Shiroinu will be taking this class until the end of the year and therefore your schooling. I expect politeness and hard work to excel in this, the top class of the school." The introductions complete, Inuyasha was left on his own; but any false notions that he looked ridiculously young to be taking the top class, was soon quashed when he turned to them.

"Please do not let the rumours of how easy my classes are from the younger scholars mislead you; you are here to work, but that does not mean we have to be serious all the time. However, I do not tolerate rudeness and I will dismiss you from the class and into the hall for any infraction of _my _rules." Then he grinned at them, well aware of how powerful his beautiful smile was on all of his pupils.

"Firstly I would like to get the unpleasant things out of the way; your homework is to write about yourself and a short history of where you live, where you come from and any interesting things you know about your own particular spot in Tokyo. This will tell me a lot about you and your understanding of your subject. Any questions?"

There were a few but not about the homework; some of the more adventurous members of the class wanted to know if they too could do the small plays. Inuyasha smiled at them;

"You have twenty minutes to get into twos or threes and come up with a small play about an historical event; real or mythological; but I want to know why you have chosen it and what you learn from the account's of the past that is relevant for today." The rest of the lesson flew by for all concerned, including Kagome who had been partnered by Hojo.

She had worried when the boy first came to her asking to be her partner, expecting to hear a low growl coming from Inuyasha; but there was nothing, no warning, no blush nor flash of anger in his eyes. He merely went from group to group offering help if required, or not interfering if the group wanted to work alone.

It actually made Kagome feel strange; for the past couple of years she had chided him and got annoyed at Inuyasha's possessiveness over her. She, a modern girl, was not going to belong to anyone; she could choose who her friends were and no medieval or youkai ideas were going to change that. She had 'sat' Inuyasha more than once when Kouga had paid her attention and she had told him in no uncertain terms that she could go out with friends male and female without needing his approval.

So, she should have been pleased that Inuyasha was not stopping her from working closely with Hojo; but instead she felt slighted. She wanted her hanyou to jump in and make her choose some female or other, not act as though he didn't care. But if Inuyasha noticed her glares, he ignored them; he was far more mature than he had been and had been well trained not only as a teacher but a youkai this time round.

At the end of the lesson, the class filed out humming with enthusiasm and Inuyasha sat down at the desk; relieved that his first day seemed successful. Kagome approached him and smiled fondly at the carefree way he now pulled his hair from its restraining tie and letting the black tresses fall down his back. She wished though that she could be the one to run her fingers through the mass as he was now doing; scraping his invisible claws across his scalp in luxury.

"Hello Kagome, did you enjoy the lesson?"

"Yes, very much...you didn't mind Hojo and me working together?"

"Of course not, you worked well together."

"Once upon a time you would have nearly disembowelled him and you _have _threatened him with Tessaiga before."

"Is that what you wanted me to do today? I seem to recall it is not the way one normally treats one's students."

"Of course not...it's just that once you would have hated me to be even near some male."

"Yes and once I would have faced your wrath too for even glaring at Kouga; I know. But I was a pup then Kagome, insecure and afraid of rejection. Afraid of admitting I was afraid even. Thankfully I am no longer that lost boy."

"You even sound even more like him." Kagome said bitterly, biting her lip. Inuyasha did not have to ask who 'him' was.

"I fail to see that that is a bad thing; I am still me, the same Inuyasha is here inside just older." He sounded sad and then she remembered as if cold water had been thrown over her;

"Your name is Shiroinu; the same as in Shami and her father? How is that possible?"

"Shami is my sister; or rather I suppose my niece."

"That means Mr Shiroinu is...Sesshoumaru?" Kagome said hoping she was wrong; but his grin confirmed her worst fears. He didn't mention the twins yet, thinking it might be a lot for her to take in for now. So he opted to remind her of her duties instead.

"Shami will be waiting for you and because you have your extra lesson tonight, I will let you off your homework for today...Wench." He added very softly, which made her smile. Then he got up and packed his bag, turning away from her; not from cruelty, but because he knew she wanted him to hug her or kiss her and that would be a bad mistake to make now. She felt the gentle dismissal and sighed.

"Where is my brash and uncouth, but devoted hanyou now in you Inuyasha; you are too much like your brother?"

"I told you I am still myself Kagome, and I do not appreciate you running down my parents; you do not know them now. I am no longer a pup, please try to understand?"

"You still look the same as ever; Inuyasha, I love you please come back with me."

"You know I cannot; now, Goodnight Miss Higurashi. I will see you in our next lesson." He left her but as he did so he released his power so she could feel how much his aura had grown and she was shocked and amazed at the strength he had hidden from her so far.

Kagome had much to think about on her way home; she had to admit that Inuyasha's display of power had unnerved her, but it was still Inuyasha and she wasn't afraid, just stunned. But he sounded a lot like Sesshoumaru and she was still convinced that the elder brother had manipulated the younger; whether by physical or mental pain or maybe just working on the small hanyou's fear of being neglected and being left on his own again.

The fact that Inuyasha looked healthy and well did not convince her that Inuyasha had not been treated cruelly; he had always looked alright in the past. Then the fact that she had not recognised Mr Shiroinu as Sesshoumaru suddenly hit home, the most dangerous youkai she had ever come across had been in the house with Mama alone and she had been to his house and had met Kyouko there; just what was going on?

When she got home she found Shami and Mama speaking softly together and Kagome didn't know how to feel. Part of her felt betrayed and played for a fool by both of them and yet the other trusted that they knew what they were doing. Hurt won out however as Mama knew it would and she was already putting her arms around the girl while Shami came over in order to explain.

Kagome was mollified for a while and wanted to see Shami without her disguise, gasping as she saw how very like Inuyasha she was. Shami laughed and told Kagome that she was the only one of her siblings that truly did as she had no markings whatsoever. Her father told her that she took after his father in looks as did his brother.

Kagome was good at putting two and two together and now she asked about the twins and were they related to the Shiroinu family as well. She knew that Sesshoumaru was influential so she wouldn't be surprised if he had been able to pull a few strings. Shami laughed and told her that the Mr Nishisakas were her own litter mates going under their mother's maiden name. 

The Miko was by now hardly surprised; but she did go quiet as she thought through all that Sesshoumaru had said when he had visited her. She didn't need to be told that he was genuine in his claims; even if the education of all children and their welfare was a surprise. She realised that all children must also include youkai as well as human and she thought that perhaps he had some redeeming qualities.

"What was Sesshoumaru like as a father Shami; was he kind to you or severe? Please tell me, can you love him?"

"They are rather personal questions Kagome." Rebuked her mother, but Shami smiled at the girl;"

"I don't mind and I understand; we all learned the story of the journey you took with Inuyasha when we were pups. Sesshpapa was difficult to say the least in the accounts."

"You call him Sesshpapa too?"

"Yes, when we became old enough to speak, Inuyasha was already using the name; so naturally we all followed suit. Sesshpapa not only _was_ a good father Kagome, he still is; none of his pups have left home yet and there is another on the way. We are a close and happy family Kagome, you should stop worrying about Inuyasha."

"I can't stop." She whispered miserably; "I love him and I'm afraid I'll lose him to Sesshoumaru's will."

"That doesn't make any sense Kagome; Sesshpapa wants us all to be happy and he knows how important you are to my brother, he won't keep you apart. Inuyasha knows what happened now, he has his memories again; he is not just relying on the fables we knew."

"Fables?"

"Yes, everyone knew what had happened to all of you destroyers of Naraku and the consequences of the jewel's purification; except Inuyasha, so he was told the stories which he adored, by Aunt Sango and Uncle Miroku. For him and eventually us the accounts were told as if a story. In the story we were told there was a hanyou of course and Inuyasha was the one who asked if the hanyou was like him. So that was how we all learnt it, the small group who travelled with the 'hanyou who was just like Inuyasha.'

"When did he find out the truth?"

"That was when he got his memories back, he was exactly the same age again as when he lost them; it was not easy for him when they returned, I remember."

"What happened?"

"Neither he nor my father, have said; all we do know is that Sesshpapa was with him alone for a few days. Although Inuyasha did change for a while; more withdrawn and jumpy until he must have assimilated everything. Sesshpapa stayed close to him, until he settled down; but that is a long time ago now."

So that is when it happened, Kagome thought; Sesshoumaru must have forbidden Inuyasha to speak about his true early memories and thereby covering up how he had really treated Inuyasha to his family. By the time that Inuyasha had remembered, the human Sango and Miroku and Kagome herself had been long gone.

There was nothing she could do at the moment however, it was way past time for her extra lesson and so the two girls went to do as much work as they could in the time they had left. But after Shami had left and the Higurashi family had eaten, Kagome was helping her mother to clear up.

"Are you satisfied yet Kagome, Inuyasha is happy and well; I for one am pleased at how he looks."

"Oh Mama, I just want my Inuyasha back; not this Sesshoumaru clone. My Inuyasha, who wouldn't accept anything from anyone without a fight and cared what I thought and wanted; certainly not considering what his brother had said." She was crestfallen, but Mama was disturbed;

"Kagome, come upstairs; you and I need to talk." She turned to walk upstairs knowing that her daughter would follow her. When they were sitting on the bed in Kagome's room Mama took her child's hands in her own and stared into her eyes; then spoke sternly.

"Midoriko warned you didn't she, that Inuyasha would be changed and no longer the abandoned waif he had been? Do you really want the boy back as he was and all that that would mean? I sat with him many times when you were at school Kagome, and I _know_ that his deepest desire had always been acceptance by Sesshoumaru. From what you told me too, Midoriko also said that Sesshoumaru wished to atone for his cruelty from the bottom of his heart. Do you deny now what you said?"

"No Mama;"

"Their wishes have been granted then. What you want to see happen is the undoing of all the past five hundred years; just so that you can have the sole undivided attention of that young man, regardless of his or anyone else's happiness.

"That's not..."

"Kagome I would have thought that by now you would have seen the error of your selfish feelings; do you not feel you are on the same perilous path as someone else? There wasanother young girl who wished to haveInuyasha conform to her misplaced ideals, someone you scorned because she wouldn't accept him as he was."

"I don't..." Kagome tried to speak but once again Mama interrupted.

"Listen to me Kagome and think on what I am saying instead of what you wish to say. To wish you could have Inuyasha back as the poor little creature he was, just so that he is dependent on you and your wishes, is no different than wanting a slave. Trying to disrupt a completely happy family by defaming the parent is not the way to win your heart's desire, Inuyasha loved his brother even when they were enemies; he is now devoted to him. 

"You must also understand, you are not the only one involved; listen to your friends and what they say, they are not all being fooled. As for Inuyasha being a clone of his father figure you are wrong again; all children pick up many speech patterns and expressions from their parents, it doesn't make them that person.

" I want you to stay up here and think on what I have said and don't let me be disappointed in you; Inuyasha is now the person he was supposed to be, had he also been brought up as he should have been the first time round. If you truly love him, you will love who he is now as well as in the past."

Mama got up and left her chastened daughter to think over her words; Mama was sympathetic to Kagome to a point, but she was very angry at her attitude and behaviour, wanting to nip in the bud the dangerous ground the girl was attempting to cross.

As Kagome was left to ponder her own thoughts with her mother's observations and realise with horror that her thinking _was_ dangerously like Kikyou's; in another bedroom across the city was Inuyasha. He was trying hard to remember that he was older and much more sensible than he had been in the past where Kagome was concerned and that the boy Hojo _was_ only her schoolmate and one of _his_ pupils. 

TBC


	8. Reflections

Chapter 8 Reflections

Sesshoumaru entered Inuyasha's room without announcement and went over to his pup, growling lightly before nuzzling him under his chin. Inuyasha whined in response tilting his head to the side in recognition of his Sesshpapa; then came the familiar caresses to his puppy ears that were his Alpha's sign of affection and approval.

"You are agitated my pup. Are you able to control yourself?"

"Feh! Sesshpapa; I'm O.K. It's just that the memories are fresh and intense. There's a boy in Kagome's class that I remember always used to be my rival; it was hard ignoring them today, it will get easier when the feelings aren't so acute and settle down."

"This is the biggest memory return you have had since the main regain, years ago. It was bound to upset your equilibrium; Hanataba and I were expecting this, will you be alright for your lessons tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'll be alright. I'm really fine now; it just takes a bit of time that's all."

"Be down in thirty minutes Inuyasha and have your meal with the rest of us; should you not come down, I will have it sent up to you and cancel you for tomorrow."

"Keh! I'll be down; don't fuss."

"Inuyasha! There was no call for rudeness."

"I know and I'm sorry Sesshpapa." Inuyasha went and pushed his head under his brother's chin asking for comfort and it was given. Sesshoumaru put his arms tightly round Inuyasha and held him; the strength in his brother's arms and the knowledge that the hanyou had, that he could not free himself, made Inuyasha feel safe. 

"I wish I could fully comprehend Inuyasha, these feelings that come back along with the memories; I understood that you were just to know that these things happened, not recall the pain. Midoriko misled us."

"No Sesshpapa, she said they would be no more than painless dreams, and that is all they are; my past does not hurt me, _you know_ this. I do not hurt but my memories of Kagome are real and she is not just my past, I must deal with my normal feelings now."

"Just remember pup, you are greatly loved and can rely on your family whatever you decide." Sesshoumaru snuffled at his brother's cheek; he did not often declare his love for his family, even when he showed it; but he knew that Inuyasha valued the words and indeed, needed to hear them. Sesshoumaru was determined not to neglect the human aspect of his brother ever again. 

"I'm ready to eat now." Inuyasha said and he went to the dining room with his brother to take his meal with the rest of the family. Later that evening he went to bed and slept a lot more calmly in spirit than Kagome, who was mortified by her mother's words especially as she could not deny the truth of them.

She did not get much rest that night and in the morning she was pale, her eyes dark with fatigue. But she got herself ready to face the day and the fact that she was very subdued, helped her to think more clearly. Kagome did not have a history class that day; but she did notice Inuyasha as he went between his lessons and she noted that he did walk more confidently, but without the posturing she was used to seeing.

Kagome had a hard time concentrating in her lessons, she really just wanted to go home and sleep as she was also a bit depressed; but it was nearly time for the end of school anyway, just one more lesson. On the way she was not looking where she was going and walked straight into Inuyasha who was watching her as she ambled to her next class. She dropped her bag and armful of books; paper went everywhere.

Other students were laughing as she blushed crimson and dropped to her knees fumbling for her possessions. Inuyasha crouched to help her as did some of the others; but he was concerned for her distant look and the fact she was close to tears, besides she smelled tired.

"Are you feeling well Miss Higurashi or do you need to go home? I can take you to medical and make sure you are picked up if you feel that is necessary."

"No thank you; I didn't sleep well last night; I..." She stared into his concerned violet eyes imagining the same look in his true golden ones.

"Higurashi, are you alright?" Another voice joined in. "Oh hello Mr Shiroinu, can I escort Higurashi back to class? I'll make sure she is alright; it is well known that she suffers in her health. I will make sure she gets home too, after school."

"Thank you...Hojo isn't it? Very well thank you. Does that suit you Miss Higurashi?" Inuyasha was proud of himself and the way he dealt with the interfering little pipsqueak.

"Yes, thanks Hojo." Kagome said in a voice resigned to the fact that she couldn't have a couple of minutes alone with Inuyasha. But what she couldn't say with her voice was ably communicated by her eyes, and Inuyasha knew she wanted him to stay with her but it wasn't going to happen. As Hojo started to lead off carrying Kagome's bag, Inuyasha gave her another book; using it as an excuse to draw near to her.

"You are still a clumsy little wench Kagome. See you in class tomorrow and get some sleep." He whispered fondly and then he smiled at her, just a little smile but pure and genuine; it made her want to cry, she was so happy seeing it. Sometimes in the past he had given her the same smile and it was always something she treasured, as she was the only one he had ever bestowed it on.

Kagome's recovery was remarkable after that small interlude, although her blushes weren't spared after school when her friends started teasing her about bumping into such a gorgeous teacher. Inuyasha's reputation as the perfect gentleman, besides being highly desirable hadn't been harmed by the incident either.

While her children were at school, Mama had been taken to lunch by Kyouko and had spent the time telling him about her talk with Kagome. Normally she wouldn't have been slightly tempted to discuss her private affairs with anyone not even a good friend; however Kyouko had passed being just a friend. The pair were now very serious about each other, and it had happened extremely quickly; they found they had so much in common and were very comfortable together. 

They had not indulged in a physical relationship yet, for two reasons; Mama wished to wait until she had a commitment and so did Kyouko. As Inuyoukai, he would not mate indiscriminately; he too wanted long term commitment and as yet Mama was still needed at home. That side of things did not matter however, not yet; they were both happy with their companionship and content to wait.

Mama trusted Kyouko and agreed that he could come to tea that evening; it was high time that the children got to know him properly too. Kagome and Souta were quite excited to be introduced to another youkai, neither was bothered about Mama courting as they knew they could trust her and besides, they were all around still.

Kyouko arrived on time and presented both Mama and Kagome with single stemmed roses, creating a good impression immediately on both women. Souta just sniggered and Grandfather nodded his approval; Mama had already informed him that Kyouko was youkai so that the old man was not shocked; in fact he was getting quite used to having them around now, they were all polite to him and treated him with respect.

After the meal, was the time that Kagome wanted some questions answered too, and Kyouko and Mama were expecting them.

"First Mama, I want to say thank-you for opening my eyes to what I was doing to Inuyasha in my mind; I just want to know that he has been happy really. The rest I'll have to deal with, but I won't try to run Sesshoumaru down anymore."

"Well done dear; I'm sure you can ask questions of your friends without doing that." Replied Mama happily.

"Kyouko, I know Mama met you at the Shiroinu house; are you related to them in anyway?" Her question was answered with a low and attractive chuckle accompanied by his twinkling eyes laughing at her.

"I am indeed; my sister is Hanataba, Sesshoumaru's mate. I am Uncle Kyouko in the household and have been since Inuyasha turned up snoring and wrapped in his brother's tail." His disclosure was met with a smile from Kagome as he confirmed her idea. "I can assure you that Inuyasha was treated properly Kagome; of course there were things that we all had to learn about the little whelp and adjustments had to be made, but he was never treated cruelly."

"Thank you Kyouko, I think I realise that now; can you tell me about his life though, or is it all secret."

"There are no secrets child and I am sure we can find plenty to tell you."

"There was no trouble in everyone accepting him because he was a hanyou?"

"No, Sesshoumaru announced as soon as they arrived that Inuyasha was to be treated as his son and that is how he is still regarded by us all."

"He was always so hated before when I knew him."

"That is because he was not given the chances he should have had. This time he was everyone's darling and pet child. Good natured and polite, besides being eager to help and ready to play. True at first he was a bit of a novelty and sought out to satisfy idle curiosity, but he thrived on the care he received.

"I remember when the first litter of pups was due and how everyone was looking forward to the next generation of heirs to the West; there was much talk and speculation about the strength that was now in the West with the combination in the youkai of Sesshoumaru and Hanataba. Well, Inuyasha went missing and everyone turned out to hunt for him.

"The pup was a hider; as soon as something upset him, he was gone. We are sure it was an instinct born in him since seeking refuge from all the dangers he'd faced. Although he did not consciously remember anything, his body did and had been trained for many years. He was good too and of course the more people searching, the harder he hid.

"It was Jaken who found him that time; hiding in his own room under the laundry that had been taken from his bed. The pup had cried himself to sleep and Sesshoumaru picked him up without waking him, and stayed with him all night. Inuyasha had been worried that he would not be wanted anymore when the real youkai pups were born.

"You would not believe the fuss that was made the next day of the whelp, he had cakes and sweets, toys; all sorts of things from everyone wanting him to feel better. Sesshoumaru too didn't ignore the blatant plea for reassurance from Inuyasha; he spent all day with the pup, playing with his toys and sharing the sweets. It was good for both of them."

"I just wish all this care was something I could reconcile with the arrogant Lord Sesshoumaru I knew."

"Kagome, forgive me; but you do _not _really know Sesshoumaru; not as I do from when we were pups together. His behaviour towards Inuyasha and his mother was cruel indeed, but was out of character for him; true he was always proud and very reserved but he did have a kind heart inside. The death of his father hit him very hard and he reacted wrongly. This he learnt and had the chance to correct; he took the chance, perhaps you can take the same one where he is concerned."

The rebuke was softly spoken, but Kagome heard it and she was no fool; she did not want to follow Kikyou into blindly thinking she had all the correct answers. Five hundred years had passed for everyone else but her, she was the one who had to adapt now; the others all had done so already. She looked Kyouko in his eyes and gave a genuine smile which enchanted him and nodded; helping him see that she would definitely try.

The rest of the evening was spent very pleasantly as they all got to know one another; Kagome and Souta were impressed with their mother's friend and approved of them getting to know each other more. Kagome of course was familiar with the youkai approach and knew that Kyouko was not messing about with Mama's feelings. 

She could see that the attraction was genuine on both sides and found it exciting; it was about time Mama found some romance in her life. She was always kind and supportive of her children and now it was time for them to return the consideration. Kyouko was good and kind too, Kagome could tell that his aura was balanced and she felt no hidden undertones. This was only something she had lately realised that she could do.

Kagome's Miko powers were not very well trained; but sometimes she found out something new and this was one of those things. The intent of a youkai often given out by its aura was well known, and she had sometimes been able to tell for herself without relying on Miroku or Inuyasha. Recently this had been more finely tuned so that she could even pick up on lies. Not that that had helped any of them with the puppet Sesshoumaru. 

She only wished she could have the opportunity to try the same thing out for the real Sesshoumaru. He had always felt powerful to her but she had to admit his aura had always been honest, however annoying. It was strange how things worked out, if her mother and Kyouko got together for real, she would become Sesshoumaru's niece in a way. The thought was a tad alarming, but it was still a bit early to be thinking on those lines.

Meanwhile Inuyasha was also searching his heart regarding Kagome and knew that the feelings that he had had in his past were still there, but he had a duty to her to wait and let her grow. However the more he saw her, the more he was drawn to her; although he knew that he would not let everyone down by claiming her before she had her soul's wish. His honour would not allow it. When Sesshoumaru questioned him on his still subdued demeanour after the evening meal, Inuyasha told him about the day.

"Feh! Kagome is not sleeping properly and I don't know if she likes me anymore. It's all too sudden for her and she doesn't seem to know me, I am so different to the crude boy I was then; I am a disappointment to her yet again." Then he yelped as a couple of very hard swats landed on his backside with an angry growl from Sesshoumaru.

"You have never been a disappointment Inuyasha; to Kagome or me, or any one in your whole life and you know better than to run yourself down. But you are correct that the girl is finding every change a lot to cope with. Oh and trust me, she does love you still and as you are now; you are not so very different pup."

"Keh!"

"Trust me Inuyasha; I know what I am talking about." Sesshoumaru had made a decision but was not going to tell Inuyasha; it was time for him to visit and speak with Kagome himself, only this time he would see her as Sesshoumaru and not Mr Shiroinu.

TBC


	9. An Unexpected Thought

Chapter 9 An Unexpected Thought

The next history lesson Kagome had went smoothly for the class, Inuyasha once again was a 'hands on' teacher who didn't just set and discuss the lesson from the front; he went to all his students making sure that he was available for questions and to give any needed help. He was able to say things in a way they could remember; getting his students to think themselves in the place of historical characters or imagine themselves at the events.

When he was near to Kagome he used his nose to check her general state of health and was pleased that she was obviously less tired and dejected than the day before. She too tried hard not to try and monopolise his attention all the time only so that he would be near to her, but it was difficult. She just wanted to be surrounded by his aura; preferably within his arms, but she knew that to be impossible.

For now she was going to have to be content by seeing him occasionally in the class where even the slightest touch was out of the question. Kagome was not the only one who found their teacher highly desirable and Inuyasha had been well trained for teaching, learning all about male and female teenage hormones and how to deal with them at college. Plus his natural youkai talents made it easy for him to evade some of the more adventurous advances of his pupils.

The youkai in him was also satisfied with the subliminal responses of his perceived mate to be, on a far deeper level. It knew that she was far too young yet to make a successful union; not just physically but mentally as well, after all he was only just old enough to be considering mating. His senses though told him that she knew she was his; she was calm near him, responsive and her desire was far more muted and subtle than the random scents of lust he could pick up from around him.

He knew she desired him but she also offered love, affection and loyalty; things necessary to a successful Inu mating even if the youkai didn't call the qualities by their human names, he understood the importance of the concepts. The youkai also may not like any other of her male companions; but it too had been trained well now and saw also the necessity of her right to choose.

Besides it was better for her to see for herself that the others were far weaker than he; so she could come to know that he was the superior choice all round. A reluctant or forced mate was not good for stability or pups. Once the youkai had come to all these conclusions, it happily stayed on the back burner of Inuyasha's mind and caused no immediate problems for him. It would just watch and protect all those under its care.

While his brother and the Miko were in the school, Sesshoumaru visited with Mama taking Kyouko with him. He needed to explain why he wished to speak to Kagome and also that he wanted her mother to be there too; in order to make sure that he couldn't be accused of bullying or intimidating the girl. Although he didn't want it to be a discussion involving Mama either.

Mama completely understood; this was to be between Sesshoumaru and Kagome only and she knew that Kyouko was with him as reassurance for her, that the Daiyoukai did not intend to harm her daughter. While they waited for Kagome to return; Sesshoumaru invited Mama to dinner again with the family, it seemed only fair for them to see where Kyouko and Inuyasha lived.

They all heard Kagome's greeting telling her family she was home and Mama went to put on the kettle to make them all tea. Kagome felt the aura of the two youkai and knew that both were familiar; identifying them a scant second before she saw Kyouko and Sesshoumaru. They were both sitting at the table looking comfortable and relaxed dressed in smart but casual gear.

Kagome stared at the being she had only seen as himself when he was wearing silk kimonos and armour and carrying swords. Here almost lounging at her kitchen table, he looked so much younger and far less intimidating. But she didn't make the mistake of thinking he was no longer dangerous, the aura was still Lord Sesshoumaru.

The Miko greeted both of the visitors with a bow before she hugged her mother and glanced questioningly at her. Mama just shrugged and smiled before setting the tea down in front of all of them. As Mama and Kyouko carried the main conversation, Kagome never took her eyes from Sesshoumaru and he didn't look at her once. Eventually though, Mama and Kyouko went outside with Souta and Grandfather, who had been tidying the shrine records and keeping out of the way.

Kagome had worked out that this was to enable Sesshoumaru and her to talk together, but she was bemused as to what he wanted to say. Surely he was not angry about her suspicions of him? Finally Sesshoumaru's golden eyes turned to give her his complete attention. For a few minutes he just stared at her, but this did not intimidate Kagome; she stared back, used to his impassive glare.

This time though she was unafraid to look and what she saw was surprising. The Lord's eyes were cool not cold, calm but not unfeeling, it made her wonder for the first time what Inuyasha saw there when they used to fight. Had Sesshoumaru's eyes been icy and calculating or hot with anger and bitterness, whenever he had glared at his brother? Suddenly she was aware that he was smiling warmly at her, the smile actually reaching his eyes; there was no doubt he was an impressive male specimen, but she was on her guard instantly. He was up to something.

"It's been a long time Kagome, since you and I have seen each other; although longer for me than you of course."

"I remember."

"I know you have had some issues with me and Inuyasha; I just want to help clear them up and reassure you if I can about my little brother. You care for him still don't you? And even after seeing him you have your doubts about his well being?"

"Of course I still care about him and I know he is still under your guardianship; he looks very well." She admitted softly. He smiled at her once again, lent forward towards her and released his pheremones. Then he kissed her on the lips gently but with experience and enough pressure, inviting her to respond. Kagome did, she was taken by surprise at first but her Miko power surged behind a slap to his face and an indignant scream.

"How dare you; you are still a jerk no matter what anyone says. What are you hoping to do, mess about with Inuyasha's mind again? I know we have to wait; but I love him and I always have, now _get_ _out_." Kagome was beyond angry and was glowing pink; Sesshoumaru was in serious danger of actual bodily harm from the purification that would have caused rather more damage, than the slightly burned cheek he had already suffered.

By now Mama and Kyouko had come back into the kitchen; the latter laughing at his brother- in- law, while Mama went over to see to the Lord's face.

"Let me see Sesshoumaru; oh Kagome, you really should be more careful dear, you could have hurt him." She got some witch hazel to take out the sting as two voices replied simultaneously;

"Nonsense, this is nothing."

"Good, I hope it's permanent; Mama what are you doing, get him out?"

"Hush Kagome it's alright."

"Alright...Do you know what he did?"

"Yes, Kagome; I do and I gave him permission to do so." Mama took the wind out of Kagome's sails with her reply. The girl sat looking lost, while she stared at the pink handprint on the youkai's face. Kyouko broke the silence by his gentle laugh and by his teasing of Sesshoumaru.

"I warned you what would happen, Sesshoumaru."

"It was necessary."

"Would someone care to explain to me what is going on here?" Kagome was very angry; she felt used and hated it, especially as her mother seemed party to her confusion. But when she noticed the quiet, she calmed down; to find them all waiting for her attention. Her cheeks grew red, but she held her head proudly.

"Perhaps you would explain why it was necessary Your Lordship." She said sarcastically.

"I wished to see if you deserved to know about my motives or any of our life. Had you responded even slightly to my overture I would have left and you would not have learned anymore." His voice was almost toneless but then he carried on with a hint of anger himself.

"Not long ago in time for you, you were confused; your actions caused Inuyasha for the first time in his life to offer his throat in defeat to me. He would have let me take his life gladly at that point, his heart was broken and still he was willing to offer you comfort when you demanded it of him without hesitation. I know that you were both fooled by the puppet, yet I had to make sure; it is not too late to change your mind."

"Does Inuyasha know..?"

"He does not know I am here; only you three and my mate of course, know what I have done. I keep nothing from Hanataba."

"You came just to test me?"

"No; I thought you deserved an explanation, we are the only two left unchanged by that time and I realise that my own anger at what had happened had made me less than fair by you. It has caused you to doubt my integrity and relationship with Inuyasha; it is time to correct my mistake in that."

Kagome nodded accepting his reasons even if she didn't like what she heard. Her guilt for Inuyasha's pain though subdued her temper and she heard the genuine displeasure still in his voice, about his brother's lack of self defence caused by her actions. She stood and went round to Sesshoumaru and placed her hand against his cheek, using her power to heal him this time.

Something about his demeanour clearly showed her that he had been shaken to the core by finding the vulnerable Inuyasha at the end of his tether. She suddenly understood that all Sesshoumaru's threats before, had just been that in truth; he had known that Inuyasha would always give him a good fight and that he was far from a pushover.

As she was pondering over these things and her other memories of the youkai, while she nursed her cup of tea; Sesshoumaru was doing the same thing. The girl was so very young and yet she stood up for her principles and her companions. She was recklessly brave with her own life when it came to her friends especially Inuyasha; undaunted even when rebuking Sesshoumaru for his treatment of his younger brother.

She was fiery and passionate, yet pure in all that she did which was why he could understand far more easily that she had been seduced by his puppet in the same way that Inuyasha had. She and the hanyou were very alike. The girl was kind too; not distinguishing between friend or foe if she could offer help to those in need, again like his brother who however reluctant he appeared to be would always help. Even when those helped were unsure or distrustful of him.

He remembered how the pair fought and argued one minute and comforted and innocently loved one another the next; throughout the whole long journey, while he watched from a distance. They'd had their ups and downs certainly; but Kagome had freed Inuyasha from more than Goshinboku, she had freed the boy from his lonely existence and had given him hope, treating him only as one of her friends and not as some outcast.

Sesshoumaru also noted that the girl had not changed; she was still audacious enough to strike him knowing that he could kill her and her mother for the impudence. So she was still impetuous, but then so was his brother; hopefully a few more years for both might see some sense develop, but he wouldn't count on it. It was time for them to talk.

"I understand your concerns Kagome. On that day when the Priestess gave Inuyasha her gift and I took him home with me, I was too angry with you to consider that you would worry about him. I realised you would miss him of course, but I was beginning to think that you were only using him. I know this was not so but you had departed long before I had come to that conclusion." Sesshoumaru watched her face closely as she went red and then paled at his words.

"I didn't hear much of what Midoriko said to either of you; I know she said that you would take care of him, but there is more to loving a child than just providing for him. I didn't know if you could do that. Or would the old hatred come back. I had nightmares of Inuyasha going through another sad, albeit luxurious childhood. I'm sorry if I have misjudged you, but he is so changed. He seems so much meeker, perhaps your rules have suppressed the natural exuberance he had, making him conform to your ideals of being a proper youkai. But he is a hanyou; did you try to crush his humanity? I don't mean to insult you; it is plain that Inuyasha is in excellent health but it feels to me that my Inuyasha is dead and gone. It was as if he died when Midoriko intervened."

Kagome had finally voiced the real issue; she hadn't said it even to herself before now and she started to cry, grieving for the first time over the rough boy she had left behind. The Inuyasha who fought with her and their companions was dead; never again would she see his grumpy face with the stormy eyes that never could hide his true feelings.

"He had to fight so hard for everything all of his life and all that he wanted was acceptance and love from his brother and others but he never got it. For all his hard work and tragic life he never saw any rewards. All my Inuyasha did was suffer, kicked down every time he tried to get up; it's so unfair."

Sesshoumaru found he could say nothing to this diatribe, he could tell that Kagome was talking from her heart and had not intended to insult him personally. These were her general thoughts from when she had seen the small infant hanyou so trusting and held in his brother's arms. Mama had come and put her arms around Kagome and Kyouko realising that Sesshoumaru didn't know what to say started to speak once Kagome was calmer.

"Kagome...my dear child; you will come to understand that Inuyasha was not just cared for in my brother-in-law's home, but that he was and is a dearly loved son to Sesshoumaru and Hanataba. Of course there was a lot to learn when dealing with him, but the boy was not crushed into any regime; this I promise you and he was never hated by his brother, far from it."

Kagome had calmed down greatly, having faced the one she blamed for the changes in her hanyou and now being ready to assimilate the new facts she had from Sesshoumaru and Kyouko. She now felt that perhaps she had misjudged Sesshoumaru and went over to the still silent youkai and bent to kiss his brow.

"Thank you for looking after Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru; he deserved all you could give him." She felt tired and asked to be excused to lie down for an hour or so. Mama nodded watching her go before her attention was taken by the still form of Sesshoumaru as he stared unseeing, out of the window. Mama started to make the evening meal, Kyouko helping her while Sesshoumaru was still was lost in his thoughts. Then suddenly his mild voice was heard;

"Will Kagome be alright? I had not thought she might consider the transition as though Inuyasha had died."

"She will be fine Sesshoumaru; she knows that you looked after him as a son and did a fine job, Inuyasha is a fine young man." Mama smiled and was encouraging, but was not quite prepared for the youkai's next words.

"But she is correct is she not? The Inuyasha that was, did die; Midoriko granted the boy's request to end his life by making him young again. I had not considered that before; my brother is dead and gone. I shall never have him back again.What great irony; when I had tried to kill him countless times before, that he should die just when I had accepted him."

"Sesshoumaru, your brother is hale and hearty at home." Kyouko said, but Mama was thoughtful. The Youkai Lord was very serious as he replied shaking his head.

"My _son_ is at home Kyouko; my well behaved, well adjusted and very well loved son is at home. Not my neglected and often abused little brother. The fighter who loved me despite all, who just wanted recognition and a kind word; he never truly received it and died not knowing that he could have his dream realised. My brother is dead; I have a son in his place, one I love dearly, but my little brother is gone never to return."

Kyouko didn't know what to say; he could hear the quiet despair in Sesshoumaru's voice as the youkai came to the realisation that his young, foul mouthed and contentious baby brother was no more. Suddenly Mama went to Kyouko and wrapped her arms round his neck pressing close to his body and then let him go.

Then she went to Sesshoumaru standing in front of him and gently pulled his head to her stomach as he wept. She had seen the gleam of tears and understood that he needed comfort. By mixing her own scent with the familiar one of Kyouko, she hoped that Sesshoumaru would accept her more readily. Mama let him cry for several minutes knowing he needed to do so, before she started to hush him, her arms firmly round his shoulders and holding his head.

TBC


	10. Consolation

Chapter 10 Consolation

Mama started to pat Sesshoumaru's back, alternating it with making big circles all designed to calm the youkai down; as she did so, she spoke sensibly to him.

"You and my daughter seem so mixed up Sesshoumaru; what a lot of nonsense you have been saying between you." Her words may have sounded frivolous but she kept up the soothing patting, while stroking of his head and still held him tightly. "There aren't two Inuyashas at all; the boy is the same one he has always been."

The youkai was in no condition to discuss this at the time; his sudden overwhelming grief for his dead brother and their lost opportunities was too intense, so Mama continued patting and rocking him. Later she tried again;

"Listen to me dear; hush now and listen. Even if your esteemed father had handed the baby Inuyasha directly into your hands from his birth, leaving you in charge and you had willingly taken him in; he would still have felt more like your son than your brother. The natural age gap aside, if you are put in the position of responsibility for a child, you will have parental duties."

Mama waited this time for a reply, before carrying on. She needed to know that the youkai was absorbing her words. He was, the storm had passed and now he felt embarrassed; not just because of his uninhibited tears, but because he had wanted the woman to comfort him.

Sesshoumaru nodded and tried to pull away; however Mama was firm and kept stroking his head which still felt good to the youkai and he gave in to the inevitable, relaxing against her. Kyouko meanwhile was mixing some cool drinks and listening to the wise words of the woman he had fallen in love with.

"Sesshoumaru, I have been in a unique position when it comes to Inuyasha; possibly I had seen a side to him that he hid well from anyone else, before the jewel was purified. No; I think Kagome has seen it too on occasion. The softer, more polite and refined boy you have now has always been there; rarely seen perhaps, but more his genuine nature than the hard tough shell he hid behind."

Again Sesshoumaru nodded as her words made sense to him and this time she let him up and Kyouko handed him a cool drink and a soft damp cloth for him to wipe his face. He did so before answering.

"Thank you, of course you are correct; his mother Izayoi was a princess and I know he was well brought up. Before...before I made them leave Inuyasha was the same child that I came to know when I had him in my care this time. I had momentarily forgotten."

"You need not feel guilty anymore over him; I am sure you made your peace with him when his memories came back."

"How did you know this, neither of us has mentioned it to anyone."

"I don't 'know'; I am assuming. You are too honourable a creature to ignore him when he needs you."

"I did not used to be."

"Perhaps, or perhaps you still kept watch." Mama took great delight in the astonished face of her guest. "For Inuyasha to love you so much from his early days; he had to be receiving something other than blows from you, however little that may have been. He is far from stupid, he probably worked out that you kept him protected at times."

"I do not understand how you would come to such conclusions."

"I told you before, Inuyasha would confide in me; when I was the only one he could call Mama. I value those times; especially when I, like you and Kagome thought that my child had died. I came to know the true nature of the boy, which is why I can reassure you both that Inuyasha, is still the same.

"He is your brother _and_ your son and far more importantly he is where he always wanted to be, in your heart. He has all his memories of his previous years and he has gone beyond them, as all children do when they start to grow up. And as he gets older he will become more your brother and friend; bonded by love from you both, just as your father or any parent wishes for their offspring."

Sesshoumaru was still unsettled but he could recognise the wisdom of her words and was grateful for the relief she gave him. He bowed his head over her hands and kissed them as he whispered his thanks.

Kagome came downstairs just before the meal was ready; having heard enough to give Sesshoumaru some privacy, and Mama was serving for them all. Souta and Grandpa had taken theirs to the shrine office as they were still working when there was hammering knocks on the door. Before anyone could open it, the door slid aside revealing Inuyasha who shot through into the kitchen.

"What's the matter Sesshpapa? What's happened; Kagome have you upset my brother with your silly notions?" He stood glaring at her, his golden eyes shining with concern and anger, his nose busy sniffing the air and his sight coming to rest on Mama. The fact that he had burst in and interrupted a meal was totally lost on the rapidly unnerved hanyou.

"Inuyasha calm down." Said Mama "Everything is fine now, will you join us for dinner there is plenty?"

"Keh! What's going on; why has Sesshpapa been crying, he doesn't cry? Kagome, you too? Mama, tell me why." Inuyasha by now had smelt that his brother had been leaning on Mama and he was very concerned about the unusual situation and irate that no answers were forthcoming. His eyes were flashing dangerously as he went back and demanded answers of Sesshoumaru.

"Why won't someone tell me what the hell is going on? Sesshpapa come on, tell me."

"Inuyasha, no one can get a word in edgeways; you haven't stopped ranting." Sesshoumaru stated and looking severely at Inuyasha. "You have barged in here most rudely without greeting anyone and have yet to answer Lady Higurashi as to your dinner." His normal voice coupled with the scolding served to bring Inuyasha to his senses; this was familiarity and therefore a relief to the fairly stressed hanyou.

"Feh! Sorry Mama; yes please." Inuyasha said contritely and went to sit down next to Sesshoumaru, staring into his brother's eyes until Sesshoumaru glared back and the boy backed down. Inuyasha had been passing the shrine on his way home when he'd noticed Sesshoumaru's car and had thought to ask for a lift the rest of the way. As he approached the house he had smelt his brother's tears and felt his distressed aura.

By now Kagome was smiling and not minding in the least the behaviour of the younger sibling; seeing in him the very thing she felt had been lost forever. Sesshoumaru seemed to realise that at the same time and they shared a smile as Kagome knew that he too had been affected enough to share her sorrow. Inuyasha caught the look and got agitated again.

"What is it between you too; have you pissed each other off or what?"

"Mind your language pup; in any case it is nothing that need concern you, everything is sorted out."

"Keh! Like hell it is." He sulked and sat glaring at everyone in turn with his arms folded in front of him before turning his head to the side and ignoring them all, making Kagome smile again.

"Stop sulking Inuyasha; whatever will your pupil think of her teacher, seeing you acting like a brat? Kagome is under the impression that you are grown up." Then he ruffled Inuyasha's hair as he could hear a slight miserable whine in his pup's throat.

"I was worried, O.K? It's not like you to be upset, even if I know the wench has a viciously sharp tongue sometimes." He smirked at Kagome to take out the sting of his words. She returned the favour by poking her tongue out at him.

"Very mature the pair of you." Sesshoumaru rebuked them; but he couldn't help a relieved smile either, especially as both Mama and Kyouko were grinning. Inuyasha was still not convinced; something had upset both Kagome and most amazingly Sesshoumaru, which then concerned him.

"You alright Kagome; you settled things between you now?" Inuyasha asked; his eyes still full of apprehension for her.

"Yes Inuyasha. It's all sorted. I'm sorry for worrying you; it's just that while we were talking it struck me that it was like you had died when I didn't see the old you, that's all."

"Hey, I keep telling you; I'm still me wench." He said, his eyes glowing softly. She nodded and turned her attention to Mama and Kyouko while Inuyasha gazed at his brother; only this time he didn't turn away. The question was clear in his burning eyes and Sesshoumaru was going to have to answer. Speaking so quietly that only one with youkai hearing could do so, he said;

"I too got caught up in the intensity of Kagome's grief; it made me consider that I had lost my little ruffian brother in gaining my son. I...regretted the lost opportunities to be your brother. Lady Higurashi however was able to reassure me that such was not the case." His own eyes still softened by his recent emotion looked down into his brother's.

"I thought we had discussed this years ago Sesshoumaru, my brother; this is all settled." Inuyasha deliberately used his sibling's proper name which he did rarely; and usually only when speaking of the Sesshoumaru of the past. The youkai's aura saddened again in memory.

"I know Inuyasha; it just overcame me that is all."

Before he could succumb again to the melancholy which was still close to the surface, Inuyasha pushed his head under his brother's chin and grumbled in a low tone that comforted Sesshoumaru. Kyouko was used to such display between parents and pups, but Kagome was entranced and although she said nothing she openly stared, happy that she saw for herself the affection of the brothers.

Later in the car on the way home, Kyouko drove so that the brothers could sit together. Sesshoumaru was still a bit unsettled and had his tail wrapped around Inuyasha; who allowed it for his brother's peace of mind, more than his own.

"Would you rather have the brother who called you jerk and jackass, bastard or worse in every breath; I can summon him in a heartbeat if you wish?" Inuyasha teased, but his brother remained too quiescent; not rising to the bait to scold him. Inuyasha huffed annoyed, but the molten eyes of Sesshoumaru were turned on him again.

"I do not wish to be called such names by my brother of course, but I can regret that my brother ever felt the need to do so and yet not know the love he was entitled to _as_ my brother."

"Sesshoumaru, your brother can still kick your ass if he wants to."

"Was that a plea for a sparring match my pup? Remember the penalties for losing and disrespecting your alpha will still be enforced."

"Feh! That's better Sesshpapa; fire suits your eyes better than water." Inuyasha grinned pleased with the results of his banter. Then he sobered up wanting Sesshoumaru to know something important to him.

"Do you know what the happiest memory I have from the old time is; apart from being with my mother?"

"I do not; I would suppose it has something to do with your friends or Kagome?"

"No; it was when my beautiful, proud and aristocratic brother, the Daiyoukai of the West invited me, a filthy uncouth and foulmouthed little hanyou to come home to live with him. You were un-coerced, it meant so much to me; you had forgiven my birth and it led to my future being with you." Inuyasha felt the tail tighten around him and he looked horrified as Sesshoumaru hid his face in his hand.

"You should never have been forced into that position of need in the first place my pup." Sesshoumaru choked out.

"Oy, I said fire suits you better than water Sesshpapa; don't get sloppy on me, please." Inuyasha whined and whined, until Sesshoumaru was forced to answer the call of his pup; pulling him close, in a warm hug. That night when Sesshoumaru crept in to watch over Inuyasha as he dreamed; the turmoil of the youkai's mind that day was finally settled, his baby brother merely slept contented and was not dead.

The next day was fine and bright for everyone as much had been sorted through in their minds. Kagome felt happier than she had ever felt, even in the past. She could see a future with her schooling and college successfully behind her and Inuyasha hopefully ahead. It was indeed good to have cleared everything up with Sesshoumaru and to be able to know for certain that Inuyasha had been happy for all those long years.

She was not naive to think that there would be no more difficulties ahead but she was confident that they would be surmountable with all the support from the families. In history class too, she had known that Inuyasha was happier with her; he had whispered that he was proud of her and of how she had accepted his brother.

He had even risked a daring, very quick but intense kiss to her lips as he leaned over her desk; his long hair shielding them briefly, and he enjoyed the complete blush that suffused her face as he stood up again.

"Do you think you have the answer clearly now Miss Higurashi?" He smirked mischievously as all she could do was nod. But she didn't care, Inuyasha was still Inuyasha and she loved him; not that it would stop her getting her revenge if she could. In the hallway after the class they had the chance to speak quietly and she asked after Sesshoumaru, apologising for bringing up his bad memories.

Inuyasha was able to assure her that his brother was quite recovered and back to his normal self; which caused them both to chuckle, although Kagome commented that she hadn't known that the Daiyoukai could shed tears. Inuyasha just smiled a little and said he had known him to before, but would not elaborate further.

That same morning, Mama received a letter along with some sweet smelling Freesias; they were from Hanataba thanking her for her kindness towards her mate, and complimenting her on her wisdom. Sesshoumaru had told Hanataba all that had happened and Kyouko had also praised her. Hanataba wished to know Mama more as a friend because hopefully they would become sisters in the future.

In this Hanataba was not pre-empting her brother, as Inuyoukai all knew that serious courtship was not undertaken lightly. Mama too knew this; Sesshoumaru had carefully explained it to her some time before and she was delighted with the prospect of coming to know Kyouko's sister.

Over the next few weeks, Kagome wished that Inuyasha would make further attempts to kiss her or show some affection but he did not. It would not be ethical and he had been incautious the first and only time he did; had they been seen, he could have lost his career and possibly not be employable at all. But for Kagome she felt a little lost and sad as it felt as if he had withdrawn from her.

It was Sesshoumaru who had found out that he had been indiscreet and he had berated Inuyasha fiercely. Apart from getting into trouble himself, Inuyasha was not being fair to Kagome by nearly starting something that he couldn't yet finish and distracting her from reaching her soul's desire. Inuyasha knew that Kagome loved him and he also knew it was the nature of girls her age to be intense about their feelings; he had no excuse in his father's opinion.

Sesshoumaru wouldn't accept that it had just been _'a slight kiss that hardly mattered'_ either; he had been able to pick up on Kagome's scent and anyway, who did Inuyasha think he was trying to fool? The pup was being selfish; he had had his second chance and was likely to ruin Kagome's if he wasn't careful. Did Inuyasha want to disappoint his parents and Lady Higurashi who were trusting in him?

It had been a long time since Sesshoumaru had disciplined Inuyasha by reducing him to tears with a tongue lashing alone. But he did not prolong his discourse once that had happened; the pup had got the message and didn't need his brother to belabour the point. Sesshoumaru knew that Inuyasha would heed the warning; or he would if he knew what was good for him, he thought ruefully.

He did, Inuyasha could see the truth in his brother's words and admitted that he was not being fair to Kagome or himself if he carried on. It would start small, but he was old enough to know that it wouldn't stay that way. Besides he valued his brother's trust; plus Sesshoumaru still had a heavy hand when it came to it, and Inuyasha didn't like being on the receiving end.

TBC


	11. A surprise Supposition

Chapter 11 A Surprise Supposition

Within the next month, the Higurashi family was to attend dinner at the Shiroinu residence; the evening was expected to be mild and there would be a small dance held in the open pavilion on the grounds, weather permitting. The thought was very exciting especially for the Higurashi women who had a superb girly day out, choosing outfits and makeup for the party.

Grandpa was very happy too, he had seen the two women in his life with sparkling eyes and heard their happy chatter with true joy. It had been many years since Mama had had these opportunities and as far as he was concerned, no one deserved it more. It was clear from whom his little Kagome had gained her self sacrificing nature and they both were entitled to such entertainment.

For Kagome she had had her nose to the grindstone for many weeks now with little reprieve as she worked at school and for her tutors. Everyone agreed that she deserved a break. However Kagome was more excited, even to the point of daydreaming and hugging herself; she was going to a dance with Inuyasha and her imagination was starting to work overtime.

That she couldn't be acknowledged very much at school by him was something she hated but understood; however in his private home it was a different matter. The day dawned and the sky remained a cloudless blue as the Higurashi family got ready for their excursion later in the afternoon. It was a new experience to go out wearing new outfits with her Mama and carrying a different dress for the evening.

Sesshoumaru had sent a car to pick them all up and this too was a first for Kagome and Souta, although Mama and Grandpa had travelled in a limousine before. Inuyasha and Kyouko were both there to greet them all and take them in where they found they were not the only guests. Firstly however Inuyasha brought Kagome over to meet Hanataba and they immediately warmed to each other.

Hanataba was blooming with her pregnancy and was a natural when it came to putting people at ease. As well, she had now met Mama several times for lunch and shopping during the school days and could tell that the two were alike. She had become fond of Mama and it was not too hard to stretch that to include the daughter; apart from Inuyasha's obvious interest.

The ice was broken even further when the baby kicked strongly and was visible to them. Kagome was delighted when Hanataba asked her if she wished to feel the baby. Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha were both slightly horrified still at the sensation of movements although her mate had come to tolerate it in the desire to be an early influence in his pup's life.

He would gently but firmly pat the limb that was protruding and tell the pup to calm down and not disturb it's mother. Mama and Kagome couldn't help but laugh at this image of Sesshoumaru imperially ordering his child to obey.

"It is never too soon to start to train one's pup." Sesshoumaru said as he entered the conversation; he sounded serious but he did have a small smile in place. "It is especially true of high youkai, they can come to know family members before birth and it is advantageous to their learning of control if they recognise their alpha early on.

"The pups can feel their parent's youki and its individual aura inside the womb; in times when many were hunted, the alpha or mother could keep a pup still just by a touch to the stomach and growling so that the mother could move. Now it helps mainly with bonding." He turned to face his brother who had just come in;

"Little Sister making a fuss is she; may I Hanamama?"

"Of course, Inuyasha."

"Hurry up little girl, your big brother and big sister want to meet you." He whispered; his head resting on Hanataba's stomach which allowed her the freedom to pet his ears. He was so engrossed in speaking to the baby that he hadn't noticed Kagome's huge blush at his tender words. Sesshoumaru regarded his pup fondly; Inuyasha had always taken great delight in the living evidence of the pups in the womb.

"Inuyasha why don't you take Lady Higurashi and Kagome to their guest room so they know where they will stay the night and then you may show Kagome around if you wish." Sesshoumaru remarked and they nodded; eager to see the room and perhaps refresh themselves. Inuyasha was only too happy to oblige and so they left to go upstairs.

As they entered the main hallway, there was a squeal from near the entrance door. It was Rin and Shippou who had just arrived home from a brief holiday. Rin ran up and flung her arms round Inuyasha who had gone beetroot red. Mama and Kagome could only look on totally bemused.

"Hello my little puppy; how did my first baby's start at school go then?"

"Aw, cut it out Rin; Shippou stop her please."

"You know that's impossible Inuyasha, just go with it until she remembers our kits are upstairs waiting for us."

"Rin, leave the boy alone; he doesn't need you to embarrass him anymore." Sesshoumaru said, but failed to get his adopted daughter to release Inuyasha; until she had petted his ears and annoyed him even more. The she ran to Sesshoumaru and gave him a more restrained hug that was nonetheless, very loving for all that. He too placed his arms tightly round her and kissed her forehead.

"Sesshpapa, Hanamama; how's the baby?" She turned her attention to Hanataba to hug her next.

"Alive and kicking; how was your break away, you both look very well?" Before Hanataba could get her answer there was a low chuckle from her mate.

"It would seem that their time away from the kits was most _productive_." He then glared at Shippou who suddenly picked up on the meaning just ahead of everyone else. With a stupid grin on his face he picked Rin up and without a further word, was off to their rooms, leaving the others bewildered.

"Rin's little puppy and first baby; what does she mean?" Asked a confused Kagome; of a still blushing Inuyasha. Hanataba took pity on him and smiled, explaining that when she and Sesshoumaru were expecting their first litter; Rin had wanted a baby of her own and the much younger and smaller hanyou fitted the bill. He became the play child for Rin and sometimes Shippou, the relationship lasted many years.

"That must have been confusing when you got back your memories Inuyasha."

"You have no idea. Shippou still won't let it go and once Rin starts, I vanish. She always calls me those silly names when we haven't seen one another for a while." Inuyasha looked lost in memories for a while and then chivvied the ladies along to go to their rooms; leaving Sesshoumaru and Hanataba alone again looking thoughtfully after them.

"You are remembering back then aren't you my love? The older Rin gets the more certain I am. There are times I see her so clearly but only when Rin is with Inuyasha." Hanataba said leaning back on her mate.

"I do not know, my mate; I have seen what you see too, I cannot deny it but...it is pointless speculation. No one else must know of your suspicion; especially not Inuyasha."

"I agree, but the suspicion is not just mine alone Sesshoumaru; it is yours as well." Hanataba left him with a kiss to check on the preparations for later and Sesshoumaru went to the gardens to think.

_FLASHBACK._

Sesshoumaru was with his new mate Hanataba who was expecting the first litter of pups; the heirs to the West, and everyone was excited. It had not even been a full year since the Lord had come home with the three young orphans, to make his permanent home at last. The news of the dark Hanyou's demise had reached the Palace quickly and when Inuyasha appeared, it became obvious that the rumours of the Shikon Jewel were true as well.

Hanataba had come immediately to make herself useful to her Lord in connection with the three children and everything had fallen into place for them. Childhood friends became lifelong mates, very quickly to everyone's satisfaction and soon Sesshpapa and Hanamama were expecting their own pups.

This had brought various other new adjustments that needed attention to light. Reassurance for all three of the orphans was needed, that they were not going to be cast aside when the new pups came. On the whole the older two were happy and satisfied with the calming words, and they understood, but Inuyasha was not always so secure.

He knew roughly what it meant to be a hanyou and that he was an in-between. No one else was and he heard many talk about the strength of the youkai now around. He thought he had been replaced in his brother's life and once he even ran and needed a lot of affection for a while. He had received it of course; but in the early days Sesshoumaru often forgot that Inuyasha had human tendencies as well as the more obvious youkai ones.

Where Sesshoumaru had learnt to be mindful of Rin's feelings, even when he didn't make it obvious; he wasn't with Inuyasha's. When one day the pup had come in to see his new parents, he had been welcomed and he watched in wonder as Sesshoumaru spoke and growled to his unborn pups and patted the lumps that were feet, hands and elbows as they moved inside their mother. Sesshoumaru had been taught about the importance of this contact by the healers.

Inuyasha had asked what was happening and Sesshoumaru explained what he was doing and that it showed that he loved and cared for his pups to provide this early protection. It would mean that they would grow to be strong and healthy, knowing this first security. From then on, Inuyasha had watched with great interest when Hanataba had stroked her belly or sang soft pup songs to her bump. Or when Sesshoumaru also spoke softly to them; stroking them gently and surrounding his mate and pups in his strong youki.

While they were doing this family thing, Inuyasha would curl up next to Sesshoumaru and watch. He'd felt he truly belonged, especially when Hanataba encouraged him to also talk to his siblings. Sometimes Sesshoumaru would pull him close and drape his arm or sleeve over Inuyasha and there would be just the three of them in the huddle with the pups moving in their cosy womb.

"Did Mama sing to me like that and pat me before I was born?"

"Yes, I am sure she did; it is a natural part of being a Mama and part of the bonding that we get with our pups."

"Papa couldn't give me his youki though could he?"

"No; your Papa was gone."

"So who did, I know... you did Sesshpapa, didn't you? You made me strong with your youki."

"Inuyasha don't be ridiculous, you know that I hated the thought at the time, that your mother was pregnant with you, a hanyou."

"Sessh..!" Hanataba cried aghast and as he looked guiltily down at the pup, he realised just how what he said had sounded to the boy; and now Inuyasha was staring at him with impossibly huge and devastated eyes.

"You hated me because I am hanyou? I didn't know, I didn't know, why didn't Mama tell me, is that why we left here? You _hated _me?" Inuyasha couldn't take anymore and he backed away; tears now running down his face and then he turned to run. Sesshoumaru was right behind him and grabbed the pup before he could get out of arms reach.

He was angry with himself; the memories of the pup's life before his mother died had not been erased, but Sesshoumaru couldn't explain to this little one what had happened, and that he had had a previous lifetime. He should have remembered that Izayoi had sheltered his brother as much as she could and had never once complained about her treatment at the youkai's hands.

The woman was always trying to see the good in her situation and yet she was no fool; just optimistic that her and Inuyasha's future would eventually be happy. Sesshoumaru should have realised that she also was not likely to have tried to put any more enmity between the brothers, and therefore would hide the truth of the elder's hatred from his tiny brother. She would have hoped that things would eventually change for the better.

Sesshoumaru was left wishing that he could have had the chance to make things right with the lady as he was trying to do for her pup. Unfortunately in answering Inuyasha so blatantly truthfully, he had hurt the boy deeply. Whereas a youkai pup like Shippou would have understood that he had been hated and that fact had changed and would have just carried on; Inuyasha's heart was different and like Rin's, it absorbed the pain instead of rejecting it as unproductive.

Now he was left holding a wriggling almost nine year old pup who, although he was small for his age; could still make it hard to not drop him. He was also wailing at the top of his voice;

"You hate me, you hate me, you hate me, let me go, let me go." Over and over and nothing Sesshoumaru could do would stop the heartbreaking dirge as he didn't want to frighten the child. But Inuyasha would have to stop soon or he would be ill, that much Sesshoumaru was aware of, but neither Hanataba nor he could ease Inuyasha's pain filled cries.

Relief came from an unexpected source; in front of him, with her arms outstretched and a blanket across them, ready to take the pup was Rin. She smiled at her Lord and his mate;

"Let me take my pup Sesshoumaru; he will be still for me." Rin's speech pattern had changed and her face looked older, as the astonished youkai handed the nearly cried out Inuyasha to her. The pup immediately settled into the girl's arms, even though she was barely big enough to hold him. He snuggled down in the blanket and she rocked him crooning a familiar pup song.

"I am going to put Inuyasha to bed and I will stay until he is asleep. You can talk to him in the morning if you wish." Rin started to walk away and still the two youkai were silent, until she had gone and then Hanataba just said one word;

"Izayoi?" she looked to her mate to see that he was pale but nodding his head.

"It is not possible Hanataba; there must be some rational explanation, the child is just playing one of her games. Possibly they are even related in some way; Izayoi was a local princess." Sesshoumaru however was shaken despite his rationalisation, Rin had never spoken in such fashion or behaved in such an authoritative manner. Not only that, but Inuyasha had quietened instantly in her arms.

"That was Izayoi, Sesshoumaru my mate; she spoke clearly and claimed her pup, besides I recognised her."

Sesshoumaru was not convinced; Hanataba was suggesting that Rin was Izayoi's reincarnation, which was a ludicrous human belief. But he had to admit now he came to think of it, there were similar personality traits between the two human females. He had also never explained satisfactorily to himself, just why he had listened to Tenseiga and chosen to resurrect the child Rin; let alone let her follow him.

The next day he had gone to explain to Inuyasha that he had made a big mistake by how he had felt before the boy was born, and that he did not feel that way now. Now he loved Inuyasha very much; but the pup was unresponsive, although being rocked by Rin. He was still wrapped in the blanket which gave Sesshoumaru an idea.

He tucked the blanket closer around Inuyasha until he was almost hidden in Rin's lap and arms. Then he had patted him through the blanket and talked to him gently and released his youki to surround the pair. It was obvious he was play acting as though Inuyasha was an in the womb baby; but when Sesshoumaru looked up into Rin's face he nearly jumped with shock, as Izayoi's eyes looked back, smiling warmly at him.

_END FLASHBACK_

That had been right back in the beginning and Sesshoumaru had not fully accepted it; but he had no other explanation then or now, and there had been other times when she had played with Inuyasha, someone other than the normal Rin had shone through. Rin had never let go her claim on the hanyou and although Inuyasha cringed at her use of the childhood endearments, he had never complained too loudly either and the pair had a very strong bond.

But if Rin was connected in anyway to Izayoi, it was best that Inuyasha didn't know and it was not likely that he would work it out now, he had been a small pup when his mother was an adult. It would serve no use to hint it to the hanyou; it was only of concern to those who had known the Lady Izayoi previously as the young mother of a despised hanyou pup.

Sesshoumaru was brought out of his reverie by the sound of happy voices on the landing upstairs and he smiled as he recognised Rin and Inuyasha squabbling over her names for him and the others laughing at the pair.

TBC


	12. Invitation to Dinner

Chapter 12 Invitation to Dinner

Sesshoumaru glided up the stairs to join the rest of his family.

"Desist you two; you will disturb any of the pups, kits or cubs that may be attempting to rest with all your noise." He was smiling however and not really remonstrating with them. Rin and Shippou were going to see if their kits were awake and introduce them to Kagome who was really looking forward to seeing the kitsune hanyou kits. She just knew they would have red hair and fox cub ears.

And they did; reddish brown perky ears with little black tips, they were adorable, three kits, a year apart in age and number four would follow the same pattern. They were friendly little souls and clambered all over her with the skills inherited from their father. The kits were still a bit too young to appreciate who Kagome was yet, but one day they too would learn all the stories associated with the Shikon no Tama.

As they went in to the nursery/crèche that was always available for visiting and resident families; Kagome met another familiar face, although the last time she had seen her, this woman had been a child. Now she was cradling her own baby in her arms; while her mate was on guard duty at the nursery door.

Even in times of peace Sesshoumaru would not be too careful with the young who became his responsibility when they were under his roof. This pool of youkai future could easily be targeted by renegades or the like. Therefore he always had guards with the children and their nurses and today it was Shiori's mate. He was a bat youkai but not from her father's clan; he came from another cave further east and preferred fruit to meat.

Shiori placed her baby in the arms of a doting Kagome and smiled as both the Miko and her mother were enchanted at the pretty baby. Silky white hair with a slight curl and the lilac eyes of both her mother and father looked up at the humans holding her. Tiny fangs too were evident in the yawn that split the baby's face and she had a nice healthy set of claws.

"Lord Sesshoumaru says that she is very like my father to look at; so we have called her Tsukiyou. Apparently noble children are often educated together and they were friends at one time. Shiori also mentioned that she and her mate Museibou had been living quite happily in his colony when a couple of hundred years ago, Sesshoumaru had started to employ various youkai in many different capacities.

He had wanted to form closer alliances with different beings and to integrate others in an effort to widen understanding; hoping to stop the petty wars from escalating. Shiori's mate could see the benefits to this way of thinking and had offered his assistance. It had been accepted and Musei had held many different positions of office in the time since and was widely respected in all circles of youkai society.

Seeing Shiori happy and contented led Kagome to wonder about the other hanyou she had met; Jinenji and she asked about him. Sesshoumaru answered her;

"Jinenji is a successful doctor and has many youkai clienteles throughout the world. He travels a great deal but still owns his father's land; preferring to live there. In the early days I had cause to call on him a few times for the various human ailments that Rin had, which she then passed on to Inuyasha."

"I thought you always told me that you didn't get sick Inuyasha." Kagome said teasingly.

"I don't anymore; but then I was a whelp. I gave you some of my Mother's remedy once if you remember."

"I remember; it was vile but it worked."

"Feh! You fuss too much over little things."

"I remember many such fusses in the past Miko; none of them were from Rin who just accepted medication without question. Even now it can be a struggle to get Inuyasha to do as he is told in order for him to heal. Do not believe him when he says he never gets ill. It is rare but not unknown." Sesshoumaru grinned at the disgruntled hanyou who couldn't in all honesty deny his brother's words with everyone else there who knew the truth.

"I don't like it, I don't want it, it doesn't hurt, I'm better, go away, I'm not going to take it, drink it, eat it, touch it, etcetera. All these words and yells and cries rang out fairly frequently when he was a small pup." It was quite remarkable hearing Inuyasha's pup voice coming from Sesshoumaru.

"They still do." Muttered Shippou; making everyone grin.

"Indeed, so when you speak of fuss Inuyasha, in terms of someone not liking medicine; I think we all understand what you mean."

"Feh!" Inuyasha said a scowl on his face; only to be kissed by Rin and further annoyed.

"Well if my puppy and first baby would only do what he knows is best for him sometimes..."

"Jinenji always knew how to cajole and make you feel better though. I seem to remember that he always placated you with some sweetmeats to take the taste away. He was so very patient and he too loved Inuyasha, as he remembered the help you had both given him." Sesshoumaru said, to take away attention from the Rin who was sometimes just too like Izayoi for comfort where his brother was concerned.

It was not that the Daiyoukai had any hard feelings anymore towards Inuyasha's mother; or harboured resentment that could affect his relationship with Rin. He just didn't like to feel that he didn't fully understand something of import and it unsettled him slightly; although, he had got used to it somewhat, over the years.

The teasing was mild and there was no hidden scorn; this time round Inuyasha could laugh at himself and with everyone, knowing that it was not meant to hurt his feelings. Seeing this Kagome could finally relax and admit she didn't want to see the pain that used to flash through his eyes when he felt people were making fun of him ever again.

This more relaxed and secure Inuyasha was definitely preferable, and she felt mean that she had ever wished for one minute that he had never had his chance with Sesshoumaru and come back with her, before the well closed. Watching him interact with his family, Kagome saw that he belonged and it was right; if anyone had deserved his chance for this, Inuyasha did.

Mama too saw all this with pleasure; she alone knew how much Inuyasha had longed for this sense of belonging in a family, she had seen him as he stood on the edge of hers, watching Kagome and Souta along with her and Grandpa. She had seen the sheen of tears far too often when they had played innocently with each other and the barely concealed joy when he had been invited along to events.

Mama had seen the child that Inuyasha had always been beneath the hard as diamond exterior he put on. Now that same child was happy and right in the centre of a large kind family where he gave and received love equally. Just as it should be; thought Mama.

Kagome had gone to peer into a couple of the other cots further in the room at babies that were sleeping still despite all the talking going on; she stopped by a pair of twins curled around one another, they were dark brown in hair colour with tiny furry tails.

"They are my latest cubs Kagome." Said a very familiar voice and she whirled round to see Kouga grinning at her, his startling blue eyes dancing with mirth. Without further ado, she was swung into his strong arms and given a hearty kiss. Out of habit, once she'd been put back on the ground she looked for an annoyed Inuyasha and Kouga laughed.

"Little Mutt knows I am no threat to him now Kagome." And indeed, Inuyasha came towards them just as Kouga was speaking, without any sign of aggression towards the wolf prince. In fact he now picked up and cooed over one of the cubs that had awoken, after handing the other, brilliantly green eyed girl to her father.

"This was almost a surreal situation to be in from Kagome's point of view, when in came Ayame. It was time to feed her cubs and Inuyasha handed the little girl he was holding to her and then made a hasty exit; he didn't want to be there when Ayame started the maternal side of things. The others had all gone out now too, but Kagome stayed, fascinated with the twins and Ayame and Kouga didn't mind. They chatted about all the other cubs the pair had between them.

The wolf tribe had thrived as Midoriko had promised even though it had taken some considerable time to build up in numbers. However with the alliance between the West and the Northern Wolf Tribe, peaceful times had allowed them to grow. Kouga had become a friend and ally of Sesshoumaru and in some cases his advisor; although he didn't say in what way he had helped the Inu Lord.

The wolves' oldest cubs had just started courting, a little early perhaps but it seemed to be right and again the next generation of wolves would soon be on their way. Kouga looked sleek and well as did Ayame, the years that had passed since she had seen them could not be noticed; youkai blood was good and strong allowing almost perpetual youth for the most advanced of them.

"So you and Inuyasha have settled all your differences now? There were no repercussions after he regained his memories?" Kagome inquired.

"None at all, obviously Little Mutt didn't remember me or our history and I certainly couldn't fight him; he was hardly much more than a baby. Besides, I had become an ally of Sesshoumaru and until our tribe started to expand, we had shelter in the West."

"You've called him Little Mutt twice now and he didn't mind?"

"No, force of habit made me call him Mutt and he was little, the name sort of stuck and he started to answer to it. I even said it out of affection; he was a cute pup most of the time." Kouga laughed to himself as he watched the astonishment cross her face. Then Kouga gave her the ammunition she had been looking for to have her revenge for the kiss that made her blush.

"I suppose he didn't tell you that he knew me as Uncle Kouga until he regained his past. He liked to play with my tail; he learned stealth and how to pounce using my tail as his prey. I have even rocked him to sleep sometimes. How is that for old rivals Kagome?"

"Uncle Kouga? It's priceless, but very sweet. I think it's great actually. I can get him back now."

"Get him back; what has the whelp done now Kagome?" Kouga asked and she told him about how red he'd made her in class. But she thought that Sesshoumaru had warned him not to do it again as he had hardly come near her since. Kouga was angry, they all knew about the Miko's soul desire and Inuyasha had been immature in his play.

"You are sure Sesshoumaru has spoken to him?"

"Yes, he said to me a few days after, that his brother had torn him off a strip."

"Very well, I won't have to say anything."

"Can Sesshoumaru still do that; I mean tell him off, Inuyasha's an adult."

"Maybe in human terms, but only just in youkai, and he patently adores Sesshoumaru; the idea of disappointing his Sesshpapa will still bring him to tears, and it happens every time without fail, if his brother scolds him. So now that I know that the puppy is properly chastised for his indiscretion; I don't have to say or do anything."

"You, what would you be able to do to him?"

"You are going to have to learn pack behaviour and laws Kagome. If I am asked by the Alpha of this pack to act in his place, I do so with full permission and agreement with all the pack members including Little Mutt. He has been over my knee a few times for various misdeeds in the past, mainly because only Sesshoumaru has the power of correction by words over him. I have even seen Inuyasha shed tears just because of a saddened look from his brother and not so long ago either."

"I had no idea he had such a hold over Inuyasha."

"Would you not feel the same if you caused your mother to be disappointed in you Kagome?" Kouga asked her.

"Well yes; I suppose I would." She had to admit.

"Inuyasha loves his brother as he would do a father. It will do you good to remember that; in our packs there is no stronger bond than between parent and pup, even when a couple mate the parental bond stays strong and this is especially so if the parent is Alpha."

"They are brothers though, Kouga."

"Physically that may be so; but Inuyasha is Sesshoumaru's adopted pup and has been raised as such since he was only eight remember, this is his life now. The majority of his prior time is very far in his past and is never brought to his mind."

"You seem to know a lot about him now Kouga, for a former enemy I find it strange."

"After Naraku a lot of things changed for the better. As I said, new alliances were formed and we lived in the Palace for a long time. Ayame and I would babysit for Rin, Shippou and Inuyasha many times while Sesshoumaru courted Hanataba or had political meetings. That was if Inuyasha would let him out of his sight. The Little Mutt came to trust us and he still does, although he might not now." Kouga laughed again; clearly not a bit worried that Inuyasha might lose affection for him.

Once his cubs had been fed and put back down in their crib, the three left the nursery and caught up with Mama and Kyouko who were waiting outside the room that had been set aside for Kagome and her mother. Mama was refreshed and Kyouko had just come to escort her down to dinner and so Kagome introduced Kouga and Ayame. Mama was of course acquainted by repute with Kouga from both her daughter and Inuyasha and was charmed to meet him in the flesh.

Kagome got herself ready while her mother and the wolves got to know one another, ably assisted by Inuyasha who had come to escort Kagome. Mama realised that they were all talking about things that had happened so long ago for them all now, and that they'd all got a new and complete history together. Their past was still so close for Kagome however, and she would have a lot of adapting to do; but then that was what adult life was all about.

After being suitably impressed with their ladies dresses and appearance and when the girls had stopped complimenting each other, they all managed to get downstairs with their correct escort and in to dinner. It was exciting for Kagome to be part of a really grown up dinner, being a part of the attraction too, and the gowns of all the women made a pretty show that would look lovely out in the pavilion where the dance was going to be.

She could already see the lanterns lit in the gardens and the trails of small white lights in the trees and bushes. They all added up to a fairytale experience especially if the look in Inuyasha's smouldering eyes was anything to go by; she could tell that he appreciated the effort she had made and realised that it was the first time he had really seen her dressed so beautifully.

This was true of course; Inuyasha was trying hard not to ogle her and to stop his youkai from taking too much notice. This was harder than he thought as his inner being could see Kagome as adult by the way she was dressed and not as still maturing. He had to be careful and put all his training to good use. But he couldn't help a couple of growls of interest from sounding and Kagome instinctively blushed and preened.

Thankfully for all concerned Sesshoumaru was well on top of the situation and heard Inuyasha's appreciative vocal undertone and he too growled low, speaking directly to his brother's youkai. It subsided immediately and Inuyasha's ears drooped, he was feeling that he had once again let down the older sibling. But Sesshoumaru smiled at him letting him know that he was not doing anything wrong and so the dinner could progress without incident.

TBC


	13. Proposition

Chapter 13 Proposition

After dinner, everyone made their way in the warm evening air to the decorated pavilion. The night was a velvety midnight blue by now and was lit invitingly by the moon and the tiny lights. All the couples walked along the multi coloured lit path chatting away to each other. Kyouko left Mama alone for a short while, when he went to speak to Sesshoumaru. The Daiyoukai nodded a few times in silent answer to questions that only he heard.

Kyouko had already spoken to Mama before dinner and before Sesshoumaru started the dance, he announced that Lady Amai Higurashi had agreed to become the lifelong mate of Kyouko Nishisaka. There was general applause for this news as everyone congratulated the new couple; even the others of Sesshoumaru's pups who were not too familiar yet with their soon to be aunt.

Souta was to be seen jumping up and down and Grandpa too was happy for them, the only one who looked a bit concerned about it was Kagome. She was a bit surprised that Mama hadn't told them, her family, first before the general announcement. She was actually pleased for Mama but just hurt and Mama, who knew her daughter very well, came to speak with her.

"Kagome my love; aren't you happy for us?"

"Yes Mama, but I thought you would tell us first."

"I couldn't, Kyouko had only just asked me and then he formally asked Sesshoumaru for his permission and also to adopt the family if we wished. Sesshoumaru agreed and by announcing our mating he has shown publicly that he will accept us all."

"But you still didn't ask us."

"Kagome, I love you very much; but in accepting Kyouko, I am agreeing to do this the youkai way. Parents do not ask their offspring for permission to mate. You have known the seriousness of our relationship for months now and have had ample time to make any worries you might have had known to me."

"But what will happen, the shrine, where will we live?"

"These things we can discuss later and all together; all that is going to happen tonight is Kyouko will mark me as his promised mate, I will not yet be living with him."

"Don't you have to...you know...mate?"

"Not for a promised marking Kagome, but I love him and it will not be long." Now she turned her attention away from her daughter to Inuyasha, who had waited patiently just out of range so as not to distract either of them from their private moments. He was overjoyed and gave Mama a huge hug that nearly caved in her ribs, before letting her go apologetically.

"Mama, I am so happy; now you will be Aunt Amai as well as Mama. This family is so mixed up where I am concerned."

"Thank you child, I am glad you are pleased with the arrangement and you are pack; that is all that matters." She gave him a final squeeze and he left to go to Kagome while Mama turned to greet everyone else who wanted to wish her well. Meanwhile Inuyasha took a subdued Kagome off to meet the rest of his siblings.

Some of them were out on the dance floor already and dancing among themselves or with the older ones of Kouga's cubs. To Kagome they all looked about the same age and as adult as either Kouga or Inuyasha always had to her. Now she realised that although Kouga had been older than Inuyasha when they were hunting jewel shards they had both been young youkai.

Then he took her to another room in the house that was full of children having a party with dancing and games. These were the younger members of both families and a few others of the staff's children. It was easy to pick out Sesshoumaru's children from any of the others; apart from the welcome that they gave their eldest brother, there were similarities in their looks. None of them were shy with her either, accepting her immediately as Inuyasha's friend.

Inuyasha took her arm and walked her back out to where everyone was dancing and then he held her in his arms and started to slow dance with her. Neither were they improperly dancing, although they held each other closely and the evening seemed perfect. Suddenly Inuyasha's head shot up to look towards Mama and Kyouko; she had slumped in his arms as they were dancing.

Kyouko had taken the opportunity to sink his fangs into Mama's neck while they were dancing so that she would be distracted from when he would mark her; knowing it would cause pain. Mama had fainted but this too was to be expected; all the youkai present had felt the transfer of youki consistent with marking, and knew that the first stage of a new mating had taken place.

Kagome was alarmed and wanted to go to her mother but Inuyasha held her back and insisted she wait.

"This is natural Kagome; Kyouko will take care of her when she comes round. We must not interfere."

"Not interfere, she's my mother." Kagome was prepared to argue and go regardless, but Inuyasha held her forcefully shaking his head;

"And she is Kyouko's mate; trust him, he knows what to do." They both watched as the Inuyoukai bent his head to lap at Mama's neck with his healing saliva and his low growls were heard by all. Soon Mama returned to her senses and she stared happily into the golden eyes of her new mate and leaned up to kiss him.

There was more applause as she did so, and then everyone returned to their dancing; although with a chaste kiss, Inuyasha handed Kagome over to Shippou, who had come to claim a dance. He then went and spun Rin round and started to dance with her; Kagome noticed that Inuyasha seemed more relaxed with Rin than he did around her.

Although Kagome felt strange dancing with a grown Shippou, it was nice until she saw Rin and Inuyasha dancing as though they had been doing so all their lives. A flare of jealousy coursed through her making her flushed and cross. Shippou picked up on it instantly; it was a familiar feeling from Kagome in the past, but this time he was old enough to recognise it for what it was.

"Come on Kagome, he is dancing with _my_ mate and I know that nothing is going on. She's been like a mother to him."

"Another one; huh, that makes at least four mother figures." She sounded sulky but Shippou was having none of it.

"He has needed them _all_ at different times Kagome, don't begrudge him the love he's had in his life. It was long enough coming." _'Besides,'_ he added to himself; '_from what I understand, with Rin it's gone full circle.' _He had overheard Sesshoumaru and Hanataba talking about Rin once a long time ago; but not only that, he had seen the close bond the child Rin had developed with the infant hanyou and Shippou was not stupid having witnessed Kikyou and Kagome.

He did however agree with his parents-in-law that it would do no good at all to voice the thought to Inuyasha and he thought that Kagome should also be included in the prohibition. Shippou danced the next two with Kagome but handed her to Kouga for the next few dances, while Shippou returned to his mate and Inuyasha went with Ayame.

It was still a surprise for Kagome to not have Kouga and Inuyasha fighting over her attention, and for the hanyou to let the wolf near her let alone hold her closely for dancing, was astounding and she had to admit a bit of a disappointment. It wasn't that she wanted them to fight in reality, but she felt a little bit like she did when Inuyasha hadn't made a fuss about Hojo.

Kagome had to admit once again that she had secretly liked the possessive attitude that Inuyasha used to show over her, even though she knew it was caused primarily from his insecurity and fear that she would leave him. As she stood resting for a moment with a drink given to her by her current escort, one of Kouga's cubs; she had eyes only for the fluid graceful power of Inuyasha's dancing as he too partnered one of Kouga's daughters.

Now as she watched them energetically leap around in a dance using fluid youkai moves, it occurred to her that Inuyasha had his pick of females who would be only too willing to become his mate. Kagome was old enough to recognise some of the looks he was receiving as desire and some of the ones she was attracting as jealousy.

Well, she could give those looks right back; Inuyasha had only danced a few dances with her in comparison to some of these other beauties and from what she had seen, these entertainments were a fairly frequent happening. Inuyasha certainly wasn't shy or lacking in knowledge of these dances, he was most accomplished and was having great fun from what she could see.

"Not everything is at it seems on the surface Miko." Sesshoumaru said cryptically. He had taken pity on the young girl; seeing Rin, in her bright glittery face that was hiding a desire to cry. There had been a time when Rin too, her new hormones jumping all over the place, was enamoured by the little hanyou once he had started to mature and she had suffered dreadfully until her crush had burned out.

Inuyasha had been far too young to return any interest or even to recognise it, but Sesshoumaru and Hanataba had had to deal with Rin's sleepless nights and tearful days many times. Eventually her 'love' for the pup had settled back into the more maternal one again, and she was happy again until she finally matured and found that her true mate was in fact Shippou, the faithful friend for the majority of her life.

"Do not be concerned that Inuyasha will find delight in any of the girls he has known for most of his second life." His voice was calm as he got to the root of her problem. "Does your soul _still _doubt his loyalty Kagome?" Sesshoumaru spoke gently knowing that his words could hurt her and that was not his intent. "He is Inu, and he loves you."

"No, I don't doubt his loyalty Sesshoumaru, but why should he be loyal to me when he could choose any of these?" Her answer surprised him; she did not castigate, but sounded sad.

"Who knows what causes attraction or devotion to one over another. If Inuyasha had shown any inclination to any one other than you, I would have kept you from knowing him again; for both of your sakes."

"You are keeping him from me now though, aren't you Sesshoumaru?" Kagome asked quietly.

"You should not have too much physical contact yet; I am aware you do not fully understand my reasons even though I have explained them. Inuyasha however does. You must have patience, both of you if you wish to have your heart's desire." Sesshoumaru took her hand and invited her to dance with him, smiling to himself as he felt her pull back hesitantly at first.

As he held her to dance and she was flush against him, she knew that she would never mistake the real Sesshoumaru for anyone else again. His sheer power close up was overwhelming to her senses and she would have fallen onto him if he hadn't supported her in his arms. But, he felt secure and for the first time since she knew him, she knew that he was more than able to keep those under his protection safe and sound.

"I'm sorry." Kagome said and he looked at her wondering. "I'm sorry for what happened; I never got to apologise to you, I was too ashamed and you were angry for Inuyasha. I was so stupid."

"Think no more of it; if anything it gave me the opportunity to give Inuyasha the childhood he deserved. He might otherwise have come through the well with you."

"No," Kagome shook her head;"he would have stayed. Midoriko would still have given him his soul's wish and that was always for him to be acceptable to you. I don't think you ever realised that you inflicted the greatest damage to Inuyasha when you left him with only your hateful words, time and time again after your fights.

"You never heard the plea in his voice when he called you whatever he could think of at the time. You never saw the tears he tried to hide as he stared after you until you disappeared from all his senses. You never noticed the melancholy that permeated him whenever he saw you care for Rin, when you never had for him. Miroku spent many hours sometimes just talking to him in the night, to stop him from withdrawing even from us after we had met you again."

"I did not at the time know all of it, I did know my words caused hurt but I thought I did not care about any of this; but you need not try to make This Sesshoumaru feel guilt, it is settled between us now. You have the right to know he has accepted my apologies for those days." His use of his old way of speech told Kagome however that he was discomforted by her words; it was all she needed to know.

"I am glad Sesshoumaru, truly I am; you too missed out with him didn't you, that is the only reason that Midoriko could give Inuyasha his desire, because you wanted to make things right. I have only just realised that." She got a slight inclination of his head as her answer before the dance stopped and Kyouko took his place.

Kagome smiled warmly at her soon to be step father and whispered congratulations to him; which put him at ease as he had known that she out of both the children, might find sharing her mother difficult. He wanted to reassure the girl that he would not interfere with her mother's parenting.

"Kagome, of course you and Souta are not my pups; but I do care for you as if you were. You are a brave girl and I know this is difficult, keeping away from the boy you desire; but it will be worth it. Our ways are old but they work and mating is for ever; we do not casually engage in life, the way humans tend to do and our relationships are sacrosanct.

"Sesshoumaru only wants you to have made that choice voluntarily if you and Inuyasha mate in the future. He does not want you to feel regret over your life if you were to make the decision now, before you are mature and have received your education and lived a little longer with a human way of life. Should you join our pack you will be expected to conform to certain standards.

"Inuyasha already does and has wanted to belong in our world all of his life. It is not so different from the human one in reality, but the pack is close knit and important; not to be tossed aside if differences arise. You will probably find too that Inuyasha will always need Sesshoumaru, even more than his full youkai pups do. You will be expected to work through problems not run away from them with the freedom humans now allow themselves.

"As reward for this you will gain trust, security and freedom you cannot quantify besides being happy with the one I know you love." Kyouko left her to think over his words while he went to get refreshments. It was true that she hadn't considered the involvement of her human liberties so much, especially as a female and she realised what she was being offered gratefully.

Kagome suddenly understood the depth of Inuyasha's commitment of his promise to Kikyou; knowing that the same devotion would be hers one day, indeed it already was she realised. Perhaps she did need time to choose which lifestyle she wanted, so she could go into a relationship with Inuyasha with her eyes wide open.

When Inuyasha came to claim her for the last dances of the evening, she looked at him afresh; he was taller and broader than she had known before and although some of that was due to natural growth, much was also because he had previously been deprived and had not reached his full potential. He had been a small pup and would never reach full Inuyoukai stature but he was no longer be stunted.

His eyes glowed with exercise and his hair shone like the moon; he was amazingly beautiful and she could tell how masculine he was when he held her. She wanted to melt into him so they became one and he too felt the same. There were no lies between them; they each knew that they were desired by the other. Inuyasha had been acutely aware of Kagome all evening even when he was dancing with others; he had hated obeying his brother, yet he had done so and had put up with watching others hold her and put the sparkle in her eyes.

He did it for her, for her long term good and out of love; respecting Sesshoumaru's decisions however ungraciously, and understanding his brother's words when he said it was only for a few years more. By the end of the evening the Higurashis were well on their way to full acceptance in the pack of the West and as they made themselves comfortable in the rooms that had been provided; they also felt well and truly at home.

TBC


	14. Lazy Day

Chapter 14 Lazy Day

The next morning was taken very leisurely as people emerged from bedrooms at various times and sauntered down to the breakfast or early lunch; that had been spread out as a cold buffet. Kagome could get used to this form of luxury rather quickly she thought, and it was nice meeting everyone again but this time on first name terms and less formally.

She grabbed herself a plate with cold meat, cheese and some grapes and sauntered outside to the veranda where she saw Inuyasha sitting and idly swinging with one foot, the other tucked under him, the swing seat with two of Kouga's daughters; one either side of him. Kagome stifled the feeling that suffused her, knowing that to pull the pair of the chair and throw them to the ground would not be dignified; neither was she strong enough.

The girls smiled nicely at her and waved, neither knowing the dangers they were in from a put out Kagome. Inuyasha too was oblivious that she was showing signs of jealousy again and then Kagome was hit with the irony of it all. At least the girls were not completely like their father, by rubbing her face in the fact they were close to Inuyasha, as Kouga used to do with her to annoy the hanyou.

Shami however did notice as she came with her own plate and she shooed the wolves off the chair to plonk down herself and she beckoned Kagome over to sit on the other side of Inuyasha. He grinned at them both and kissed them in welcome, teasing Kagome that she still needed more rest than he did.

There was a snort from Shami, echoed by her twin brothers who were sitting directly on the veranda.

"You are only up early because Sesshpapa told you to keep an eye on the little ones and to keep them quiet. so your guests could rest; under threat of no lunch if he heard them." Kenshiki said laughing and ducking out of the way of Inuyasha's foot.

"Feh!" Was the eloquent reply; followed by a cushion to Kenshiki's head. This was of course returned with interest and Inuyasha jumped up to leap on both the twins. They upended him with ease and raced off, Inuyasha in hot pursuit all around the gardens and up in the trees. The younger children thought it was great fun and were running all over trying to see what was happening.

There were squeals and yells of encouragement from the young ones and louder laughs and colourful phrases from the three bigger boys, until the sound as of three rifle shots flashed with a green light, rang out. These were followed by anguished yelps and the sound of crashing, as heavy bodies fell out of the trees nearby.

Sesshoumaru stood on the balcony and retracted his energy whip from his fingers and waited until his sons appeared before him. Shami and Kagome were trying not to laugh at the sorry state of the boys. They were bedraggled and sore and that was before Sesshoumaru started his reprimand.

"You will all three spend time now in clearing up the wreckage of the trees that you have caused. I am most displeased, you have cost a lot in blossom by your ridiculous behaviour and the trees will not be as aesthetically pleasing nor so productive this year. I had thought you would have outgrown this form of recklessness.

"Inuyasha you were to keep the children quietly entertained this morning; or had you forgotten that one of your guests especially is a much older human and one is much younger, both needing their rest. You have disappointed me pup." Sesshoumaru's remonstration was not loud but was the more forceful for the fact. The three boys were contrite; they had forgotten, caught up in the moment that they had responsibilities

"Sorry Sesshpapa" they said in unison and sincerely before going in to the house to get ready to clear up the mess.

"Inuyasha" Sesshoumaru called him back. "You still rise too easily to the bait my pup, and yet you are the eldest and should recognise your responsibility. Will you ever learn?" But he ruffled the hair between his brother's ears to show he was not really angry anymore and because Inuyasha always needed that reassurance far more than Sesshoumaru's own pups.

Sesshoumaru sighed as Inuyasha blinked back the dampness that always surfaced if his brother was disappointed in him; the Daiyoukai had to treat the pups the same and yet Inuyasha always took it harder than his true sons. The youkai took any discipline as a trial of strength and their father had always had to prove his right since they had been younger; but it was not so with Inuyasha and it had led to misunderstandings in the past until Kouga had helped him out.

Sesshoumaru came and sat on one of the other swings and watched the boys come out to go to one of the sheds and retrieve tools they would need to clear up the mess. This time the children would watch the boys clear up the damage they'd caused. Even after all these years growing up together with the full youkai pups, Inuyasha was still the more sensitive.

The twins were already laughing and larking about as they swept the leaves and fallen blossoms off the grass, where if they were left they would rot and destroy the lawn. Inuyasha though worked quietly alone, picking up the twigs and small branches; placing them on the woodpile by the pond that was kept for bonfires in the cooler evenings.

Rin appeared and plumped herself down on the cushions next to Sesshoumaru and curled up like a cat against his side. She watched Inuyasha and the twins for a while with a smile on her face and then said;

"You have scolded my puppy haven't you Sesshpapa? His ears are flat on his head. What has my first baby done now?"

"All three of the pups have made a mess of my cherry trees Rin and they have all been reprimanded; not just Inuyasha." He replied drily; well aware of the difference in the attitude between the boys.

"He won't like that in front of Kagome, being treated like a little whelp."

"Then he should refrain from acting like one Rin. Perhaps he will also learn to think before he causes mischief."

"I wouldn't count on it Sesshpapa."

"I do not. How about you Rin, your new pup is comfortable within you?" Sesshoumaru changed the subject and took a coffee from one of the maids who had placed a fresh pot on the table nearby.

"Everything is fine so far Sesshpapa, what about Hanamama?"

"She is resting today but will be up later." He turned his attention once more to the boys until they had finished their chore and the garden once again looked immaculate. Sesshoumaru didn't mind them racing in trees, but there were plenty in the forest for that sort of game; there was no excuse for using his ornamental and fruit trees and he was still annoyed at seeing the damaged foliage.

"We've finished Sesshpapa; you'd never know the difference." Called Koumyou as the twins went to put the rakes and brooms back in the shed. Obviously the boys hadn't looked at the trees, but Inuyasha had and knowing that they were special for Sesshoumaru he felt bad for the destruction, however minor.

When he came back he went to sit at the feet of Sesshoumaru and laid his head in his brother's lap and Rin leaned over to pet the puppy's ears. Kagome watched him, swallowing viciously her feelings of being useless when he didn't come to her for petting, but went to another female instead. But she recognised that he was apologising to his brother and needed to feel forgiven, not just for the trees but for not setting a good example.

So, he was still not that far from being a child then, or rather a not quite adult; it seemed that the male of any species matured slower than the female, Kagome reflected. The moment didn't last long before the hanyou sat up leaning forward, and poured himself a cup of coffee. When he finished he put his arm out to Kagome inviting her to come to him, but she noticed that he kept one eye on his brother for permission.

Not getting any negative look or sign, Inuyasha pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms round her as he leaned back against Sesshoumaru's legs, and they sat drinking coffee and watching the children play for over an hour all together in comfortable peace. In fact Kagome was content to doze on and off having Inuyasha as a pillow.

When she roused herself later she found that most of the household had come out to the veranda and was sitting on the wide steps or on the plentiful seats that were generously placed. Her mother was sharing a small couch with Kyouko who had Souta on his lap and Grandpa had a nice chair all to himself while one of Kouga's cubs was making sure that he was served with food and drink. The cub was fascinated by the elderly human who could tell stories.

It was inevitable Kagome supposed that with so many parents around, the talk would turn to the embarrassing childhood deeds of their various offspring. Mama and Ayame were chatting gently and their soft murmurs and chuckles added to the warmth of the afternoon as they found out there was not much difference in the antics of their human or youkai offspring.

Hanataba too soon entered the conversation and at about this time Souta who was bright red by now decided to go and join the children in the garden. Kagome chuckled as she heard again that Inuyasha had been enough of a handful as a single child, enough to make them think twice about having pups too soon themselves. However the best laid plans rarely worked and Hanataba had found herself expecting within a month of mating.

"I thought you had turned into the model child Inuyasha."

"Feh! I was; I was good as gold for them, just like I'd been for my Mama." Then he got up to go inside and fetch them all something to eat.

"I find it hard to believe sometimes with the foul mouthed, insensitive brat he became, that his Mama was a princess." Kagome's tone indicated she was just observing but Sesshoumaru answered her anyway.

"Inuyasha was unnaturally good for a child his age. While he lived with his mother, he learned quickly that she suffered if he was considered disruptive. He was severely beaten by his uncle if he misbehaved, and this caused his mother great distress and censure; for not having sufficient control of such an abomination. From what he has told me, if he was seen or heard at all, it was enough for him to be in trouble. All Hanataba means is that it took a bit of time to help him learn that he could act normally, run and play with the other two; meanwhile he was demanding of my time, purely because I was his only security."

"He was a poor little mite in the beginning wasn't he Sesshoumaru?" Said Kouga; coming out side with food, along with the blushing Inuyasha, who had overheard the last part of the conversation. Kouga grinned. "Never mind Kagome, Uncle Kouga and Aunt Ayame helped to sort them out; Inuyasha could be an imp when he wanted his own way and he was forever running and hiding for various reasons."

"Cut it out Kouga, Kagome doesn't want to know all your ramblings." Inuyasha realised that that was a ridiculous thing to say when he heard Sesshoumaru chuckle loudly behind him and Kagome say;

"Don't be rude Inuyasha of course I want to listen to your 'Uncle Kouga'. I like to know how you grew up." She and Kouga laughed as Inuyasha groaned and decided to go and play with the kids. After checking with Sesshoumaru that it was alright to speak to Kagome, Kouga laughed again; these things after all were not secrets.

"Ayame and me came to live here quite quickly after you left, there was a lot of sorting out to do; we are still here often because the families are close. But when we arrived we noticed that Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru had a slight problem; Inuyasha hated to be anywhere that Sesshoumaru wasn't, which made courtship of Hanataba difficult. So like I said before, we often babysat the three children.

"Most of the time we could occupy them for a couple of hours to give the lovebirds some private time; but it wouldn't be long before something spooked his little lordship and he'd be off trying to reach his brother. Mind you, if Inuyasha wasn't trying to find Sesshoumaru; his Lordship would come looking for his baby brother." He grinned wickedly at Sesshoumaru who just smiled and rolled his eyes.

"Inuyasha always tried to please This Sesshoumaru; he was still afraid that he would be punished if he did not. It took a few months before he understood that misdemeanour would not be corrected by extreme measures. But it was not necessary in any case; Inuyasha did not like to be in disgrace and still does not."

"But," continued Kouga;"that also became a problem in itself. For the first few years everything was fine, Inuyasha was mainly a good and careful pup and if he did wrong Sesshoumaru only had to correct him verbally and that was enough for him to abstain from repeating an error. A lot was still left over conditioning from his time with his mother.

"However as time progressed and the first litter started to grow and also start to play, Inuyasha was the older brother and he started to branch out. He had been watching Shippou for long enough and put some of his tricks into practice. We were pleased to see in some ways that he felt more secure, but he was leading the new pups astray.

"One day he had encouraged them to dig up a patch of garden that had been newly planted and Sesshoumaru as usual started to tell him off and Inuyasha got that scowl on his face he used to get with me around, you remember." Kagome nodded and Sesshoumaru carried on;

"To be reminded of such a time we were trying to correct and when he looked at me that way as such a small pup; I found I could not continue and I sent him to his room. I did not realise that he was not scowling so much as trying not to cry. Shippou had teased him for his tears when I scolded him and called him a baby in front of Rin and the twins. I would have acted differently had I known.

"So after that, I would send him straight to his room until he would apologise, unable to face his anger at my words. I did not know that this was the wrong way to treat him until Kouga and I spoke about it one day, when I was uncertain of how to treat the boy who was becoming intractable and causing problems around the house. Inuyasha's language was getting bad and his attitude to his parents was unacceptable, and all this in a child far too young to be going through the bodily changes that might have excused some of his behaviour. He was spending more time in his room that out of it."

"Actually it was Ayame who thought she knew the answer and it proved correct." Kouga followed on; "Wasn't it my love? It was you who worked out Inuyasha's problem." Ayame smiled and said it wasn't too difficult. The pup had always responded to being told off; but was now being sent away, ignored and left alone for long periods of time. It stood to reason that he was feeling cast off and was reacting in the same way he had done when he had really been left to fend for himself.

Sesshoumaru looked at Kagome and her mother before he spoke. He felt the two women deserved to understand all that had happened to Inuyasha if they wished to know; the pup was important to them and had been at a time when he had been neglected.

"Inuyasha felt I had pushed him away; that I couldn't or didn't want to spare the time for him anymore. I had failed to realise the importance of physical contact to him; even when I had castigated him before, I had always petted him once he was remorseful, and not just acknowledged with a glance his apology, as I was doing then."

"I couldn't see what the trouble was at first either, I admit," said Kouga; "had Inuyasha been in the wolf pack he would have been seen to quite speedily and not allowed all the freedom to sulk that he was given here. In our packs anyone can deal with an unruly pup, but of course the two Inus were brought up separately and differently. However Sesshoumaru let me deal with Inuyasha the next time he needed discipline.

"I went in to Inuyasha's room after he'd been sent there again, only to find he had almost thrown everything about in his temper and I told him to tidy it up. He refused and so I immediately pulled him over my lap and spanked his bare backside for him. I wasn't severe he didn't need that, but he did need to be taken in hand.

"I let him cry for a while and he asked why Sesshoumaru no longer loved him; Inuyasha felt that his brother was ignoring him. This was what I had feared was the problem and I handed him to his brother for them to sort out their upset. It was easily sorted, but Sesshoumaru found it very difficult to administer physical punishment to Inuyasha, so if it was needed it usually fell on me or Kyouko."

"It was not necessary for me to chastise Inuyasha, I reverted back to verbally indicating my displeasure and that has always been sufficient. I know that Inuyasha didn't remember, but I did; I found it next to impossible to raise my hand to him again, he'd known too much of it from me before."

"Are you done yet with all your talk about whipping my ass; 'cos I'm bored with it? All kids are naughty and get walloped at times, so what; forget what Kouga said Kagome, he exaggerates." Inuyasha was fed up; what a subject. "Kouga's getting too old to remember properly, he forgets when I used to thrash him into the dust before Naraku died."

"You wish puppy."

"It's all a long time ago now so forget it. You did a good job with me Sesshpapa; I turned out alright, everything turned out alright."

TBC


	15. Inuyasha's Secrets

Chapter 15 Inuyasha's Secrets

When Inuyasha got back from escorting the Higurashis home he rejoined his brother in the main living room, where Sesshoumaru sat nursing a drink. The Daiyoukai was waiting for Inuyasha to come in and everyone else had retired to their rooms for the night. Inuyasha sat at his brother's feet and complained loudly to Sesshoumaru.

"Aw Sesshpapa, did you and Kouga have to tell Kagome all that rubbish? You made it sound like such a big deal, like I was a nutcase or something, or at least like one of the slightly disturbed children I had to learn to take care of. She already knew how messed up I was when we were together; I wanted her to know I was just a normal pup. Now she's gonna think I'm a freak or something."

Inuyasha sighed, feeling hard done by. Sesshoumaru however flicked his puppy ear making it sting and replied;

"One thing I will say for Kagome, she has never considered you a freak; not now or in the past, even when you did and if she heard you hint at such a thing she would be most upset. She wants to know how you grew up Inuyasha; she still feels guilty about what happened at the end of your quest and hated watching you as a little pup leave her behind.

"Yeah, but the last time she knew me and Kouga, we were fighting over her and I always won; she didn't need to hear that he used to...what he could do to me this time round."

"Both she and her mother do need to know that you had a normal upbringing and they want to hear about it; they love you, hard as it is to understand that for you sometimes."

"I don't doubt you love me Sesshpapa or the rest of everyone; I remember the feeling of being unloved and I know the difference. You know I do."

"Most of the time I do not doubt it, but you are having nightmares again; you cry and struggle in your sleep. Is it still the same one?"

"Yeah, it doesn't vary very much; don't worry, I'm O.K."

"You still refuse to tell me about it?"

"Nothing to tell Sesshpapa, if you could do anything I would tell you." Inuyasha then bade his brother goodnight and went to bed; but Sesshoumaru stayed awake and waited, knowing that Inuyasha would have another nightmare that night. He had worked out it was something to do with his real mother, and it was around the anniversary of the time she died that his brother would have these bad dreams.

As he had done for a few years now, Sesshoumaru entered his brother's room when he heard the boy cry out in the throes of his night terror; but this time the youkai waited instead of gently waking him up and watched Inuyasha to see if he could identify the cause of the dreams. He called for his mother in the voice of a child, then his breath got ragged as if he were running hard before he cried and then struggled getting tangled in his bedding.

At this point Sesshoumaru called him and tried to disentangle Inuyasha from the sheets. When he had done so and Inuyasha had awoken, Sesshoumaru handed him a glass of water. Usually, the youkai would stay and ask if his brother were alright until the boy went back to sleep, when he would spend a more peaceful night. But this time Sesshoumaru thought he had worked out the dream, and he doubted if he could exorcise it.

After Inuyasha had taken some water and his breathing had calmed, Sesshoumaru said;

"The Unmother; you dream of your mother's death and the Unmother and it was why you felt you could not tell me." There was no answer from Inuyasha; he didn't know what to say. Sensing this, his brother spoke again;

"Tell me pup, speak your dream." He was not looking forward to this; but as he had contributed to it in the past, it was the least he could do. Inuyasha closed his eyes not wanting to discuss what he saw but knowing that Sesshoumaru wouldn't let it go either. Speaking quietly he said;

"It is not long, sometimes it repeats itself and it is not accurate; I see mother killed again and then I run. Run from the villagers and my uncle's palace; from youkai who want to eat me and then I see mother again in a pretty light. I run to her, I'm always running; she holds me close, safe in her arms, but it's too close. She is suffocating me, smothering me in her breast and I can't get free and then I watch her die again. Is that what you wished to hear Sesshoumaru?

Inuyasha turned his face away, the nightmares were very vivid and even though he knew that the Unmother was not his real mother, at the time his dream did not distinguish them and he felt immense pain when his brother slew the pretender right in front of him. When he was left to sleep normally, he always worked it through; it was not something he felt he could bring up with Sesshoumaru, mainly because of the youkai's involvement in the original trap and the feeling of bitterness it still raised in him.

"Of course not Inuyasha, I regret as ever causing you pain at any time, but it is not healthy for you to keep such things to yourself." Sesshoumaru could of course supply for himself all the details concerning the death of the Unmother Youkai. Swallowing his own feelings about Inuyasha's dream he pulled his brother close to him and stroked his hair; allowing the pup to lean on him.

After all, regardless of his remorse of the past, Inuyasha was now his pup and needed the father not the selfish brother at the moment. They sat together for nearly quarter of an hour, not speaking and finally Inuyasha relaxed and slumped against Sesshoumaru, the pup was tired and drained, not just with the nightmare but also from the adjusting back he always had to do.

Inuyasha loved Sesshoumaru without reserve, except at the moment of waking from his nightmare when the pain was always too fresh. Thankfully it was the only repercussion of that time he had had so far. On the other hand Sesshoumaru was now well aware that he was the cause of his brother's turmoil, and it worried him until his brother snuggled down next to him and fell asleep.

They had been in a similar predicament at other times, the past would on occasion rear its ugly head but the new memories were always able to drown out the bad. Sesshoumaru knew that the very fact that Inuyasha was able to go to sleep in his arms again meant that the pup's mind was at peace.

Once he had made certain that his brother was definitely sleeping he manoeuvred himself out from beneath Inuyasha's head and shoulders, laying the boy onto his pillows and covering him with his blanket. Then he went back to his room to find Hanataba awake and waiting; she knew too that Inuyasha was having bad dreams and wished to know all that had transpired.

In the morning however, Inuyasha was back to his normal self with no hint of anxiety or hidden worries; Sesshoumaru made sure of this for himself, by checking the pup's scent. Inuyasha was happy and relaxed and ready for his next lessons that morning; although he did come and push his head beneath his brother's chin wanting and offering reassurance, which was unstintingly given.

The next evening at the Higurashi Shrine, Mama was discussing with her family what she and Kyouko had suggested for said family's future. The couple wanted to all continue to live at the shrine even after Mama and Kyouko had completed their mating; if it was alright with everyone else, that he come and live there with them. Although there would also be times when Mama and Kyouko would have to spend time in the Western Palace; as Kyouko was an important servant, as well as brother-in-law to Sesshoumaru.

This was agreeable to all; eventually when Souta was old enough and if he wished, he would take over the shrine or other arrangements would be made, but for now it would remain home for Souta and Kagome. Kyouko was wise and he could afford to wait for Mama until she and her family were ready to take the next step. His preliminary mark had stopped Mama ageing as a human and although they had talked of marking Souta as pack to do the same, she had decided against it, her son may not wish to have the life span of a youkai.

Kagome had no objection to her mother's requests or decisions; she was very happy for the new couple and had no qualms about her future with a stepfather. He was a good person and trusted by her oldest friends; there was no need to worry about her mother's safety with Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru standing by.

Then when the meal had been eaten and they were all relaxing in the living room and chatting about the great weekend they'd shared, Kagome confided that she still found it difficult to reconcile Inuyasha and Kouga as friends; let alone in the familiar capacity they seemed to share. The idea of Inuyasha and 'Uncle Kouga' nearly had her collapsed in laughter as she remembered the fights the pair used to have.

"I can only try to help you understand that they will never see one another in that way again Kagome. Inuyasha remembers now certainly, as of course does Kouga because he never forgot; but things have happened since that has put their relationship on much firmer ground." Kyouko was a good story teller and knew he had a captive audience with Kagome as far as Inuyasha was concerned. She took the bait.

"Very well, I will tell you what happened, one day when Inuyasha was about thirteen, bearing in mind that his youkai blood had stopped him ageing at the same rate as a human. Rin was between fifteen and sixteen; Shippou was about fifty five I think, but that obviously is very young teen in human terms."

_FLASHBACK_

Inuyasha and Shippou were playing out in the extensive gardens playing with Inuyasha's red ball. This was not the one that his mother gave him, because that was worn and old and would have confused Inuyasha. Sesshoumaru had taken the old one to keep safe and replaced it with a new one that he had wrapped in some of Inuyasha's clothes so that it took his scent. The only thing he couldn't do was give it Izayoi's which the old one would still have had at his age.

But Inuyasha never questioned the ball, he was only too grateful to have someone to play with him; his solo games usually had made him feel even more lonely. The boys had just sat down with some fruit as a break and were getting their breath back, when they overheard two of the nursemaids who sometimes looked after Inuyasha, chatting about their charge together.

One said how sweet Inuyasha was, how he liked having his ears scratched and that he looked almost intelligent when he spoke. But she wasn't sure if Lord Sesshoumaru was wise in allowing the pup near to his own offspring because Inuyasha might still bite, being only a young dog. The other nurse was shocked at her words and warned her that Inuyasha was considered the Lord's pup himself.

This led to an amused snicker from the first, who said that Sesshoumaru was only doing what he felt obligated to do in housing the hanyou; after all, it was not much more than a beast, with the human taint. She had to admit that he was docile and more than likely trainable, as he was so eager to please; but he was too young to be fully trusted yet.

Both Inuyasha and Shippou were shocked at the words; Inuyasha had heard such from the humans he had lived with and the villagers who always chased him, but he had been protected from such ignorance in his brother's home this time around. He was visibly shaken that someone he cared about could think so little of him.

Shippou tried to take his upset playmate in to the Palace where he could be comforted by his brother but Inuyasha pulled away. He walked out of sight into the orchard and then he ran and scrambled over a low wall into the forest. Shippou meantime went running in to find Sesshoumaru, only to find that the Daiyoukai was on a visit to a neighbouring Lord; but he was in luck because Kouga had just arrived to meet with the Inu as well.

Immediately the Wolf Prince listened to Shippou and went straight out to hunt down his adopted nephew; concerned when he found that Inuyasha had done a runner yet again. Normally however the pup didn't leave the grounds when he went to hide; although even more serious was the way his scent suddenly ceased in the middle of the meadow on the edge of the forest. There were also a few drops of the pup's blood in the grass.

Inuyasha had vanished nearly without a trace and there was no indication either of what had taken him. Something definitely had removed him by force, but what creature could leave no indication of itself? He looked around some more; surely Inuyasha would not have been taken without a fight, he must have been knocked out or...grabbed from above. Kouga found a shiny black feather and knew it belonged to a Buzzard Youkai.

It was not a very large youkai but it would have been able to pick up a small pup like Inuyasha and Kouga knew he had to hurry. He no longer had the speed in his legs that the Shikon Jewel had given him, but he still could move faster than most and he took off in the direction of the Buzzard's nesting ground. On the way he killed a few hares as an offering in exchange for the boy, it was time for the fledglings to have hatched and no doubt Inuyasha would not be given up for nothing when there were hungry mouths to feed.

Besides it was not right to kill his abductor for just picking up a stray unwanted hanyou as sustenance for its brood; and that is all Inuyasha would have appeared to be, as he wandered about the meadow unescorted. It took Kouga most of the day to find the nest and then several hours more to climb up the cliff face where the tree it was in, was situated.

When he came face to face with the Buzzard Youkai though, he found that Inuyasha wasn't there. His petrified scent was present so Kouga knew that he had reached the correct nest and obviously the pup had screamed and kicked and slashed with his claws; getting a few good pecks and claw scrapes for his trouble. The Buzzard had then dropped him from the nest as the pup was more bother than he was worth; besides he mentioned that his brother would come for him.

As the Buzzard said, he would not deprive another of their chick and the pup was lucky, he would normally have killed his prey before bringing it to the nest. He thanked the wolf for the gift of the hares, that was far more welcome than the hanyou in any case, and Kouga went off to hunt for Inuyasha.

The trail was not difficult, Inuyasha's blood from the pecking was obvious and so was the salt from his tears. Kouga found the pup holed up in a deep cave huddled right to the back of a deep recess and crying for his brother. Kouga was so pleased to see the pup safe, that he picked him up and kissed him; getting a scratched nose for his trouble, because he took Inuyasha by surprise and frightened the boy.

But when he realised who had found him he clung like a limpet round Kouga's neck and he didn't stop crying or clinging, until Sesshoumaru plucked him gratefully from the wolf's arms on the return trip. Sesshoumaru had followed Kouga's trail as soon as he had returned and met the pair as they were coming home.

Inuyasha gripped tightly to his brother's fur for the rest of the way and wouldn't let him go even to eat or at bedtime. Sesshoumaru was clinging to him in the same way however, as he had heard what Kouga had to say and knew how close he had come to losing the pup. Despite a thorough scolding from both his brother and Kouga; which just ended in more tears, the episode bonded Inuyasha and Kouga closely together. Neither had forgotten and even though Inuyasha's other memories have returned; they cannot take precedence over what happened in this second lifetime of his.

_END FLASHBACK_

Kagome wished to know what happened to the nurse who had instigated Inuyasha's flight and Kyouko told her that she had been dismissed by Sesshoumaru. What he didn't tell her was that the next morning Rin had cornered Inuyasha and dragged him to her room. She had been devastated when she knew he was missing and furious that he had run when he knew he should have come and talked about the problem.

She was angry that he hadn't thought about everyone else being upset that he had run off, and put himself in great danger. He knew there was danger outside the Palace and he knew he had done wrong. Inuyasha agreed, but he had felt upset and angry; he had just wanted to think, to which Rin replied, he clearly hadn't thought at all.

Rin had then turned him over her lap and spanked him hard six times with her hairbrush, making him yelp and cry;

"What would we have done if you'd been killed my puppy? Did you think at all how Sesshpapa would feel; he would have been absolutely devastated. You have been so selfish my baby." With that, she too burst into tears; just as Sesshoumaru and Hanataba came in to see what all the noise was about. They found both Rin and Inuyasha clutching one another as if they would never let go and wailing at the top of their voices.

Although they had rebuked Rin for taking the matter into her own hands, secretly they both sympathised and it saved Sesshoumaru himself from having to discipline the pup further for his foolish actions. Inuyasha had learned his lesson and nothing had stopped the love and affection that the family had for each other, and neither Rin nor anyone else had had to repeat her lesson.

Kyouko privately thought that Kagome had no need to know all the details of the ways Inuyasha had been dealt with throughout the years. If he wished to tell her at some time he could do, but otherwise it was private; it was not for his uncle to divulge all the boy's secrets. A bit of teasing with everyone there was different and Inuyasha had been able to veto it had he wished. There was still a selfish area in the girl's heart that thought she should be privy to everything pertaining to Inuyasha and that was just not true. She still had to earn the privilege.

TBC


	16. Time Goes By

Chapter 16 Time Goes By

As time went by over the next few months it was inevitable that Inuyasha and Kagome would grow closer and this was not a bad thing nor considered undesirable by any. All anyone wanted for the two, was a natural progression and solid grounding suitable for the time they were living in; away from the troubles and strife of their previous adventures.

They were both doing well with the ground rules that had been set and when Kagome saw that it was working out and she could still talk to her beloved hanyou, she settled down easier. As Sesshoumaru had said some things had to take time to prove that they worked. Kagome started to enjoy school more and not just because Inuyasha was there and his classes were fun but she also could keep up in her lessons now.

Shami and the twins kept her filled in with all the details that she missed during the week and she in turn kept her own end of the bargain, working hard and steadily catching up with her classmates and on track for her graduation. But there were other benefits to being obedient to the wishes of her mother and Sesshoumaru.

Away from the intensity of the life she had led for a few years in the feudal era; away from the life and death situations that put unusual pressure to live life to the full in case it ended, and away from the heartache of never fully knowing if she was second best, she and Inuyasha could come to know each other again for themselves.

He no longer had to hide all his feelings, afraid that she would reject him or that she in turn would be ostracised for loving him. He was no longer confused by what love entailed having seen how his brother and his older friends all had successful matings and families that did not weaken them or put their lives in danger.

He was still shy, but no longer the gauche boy who had dragged himself up, and whose need for self preservation and to protect his heart, made him brittle and angry and so very vulnerable and suspicious. Now he was very well loved and well adjusted; unafraid to admit his fondness and love for the girl he remembered had stayed at his side through hardships no one else could dream of, or had lived through.

Kikyou still had her place in his heart but now he recognised the lonely compelling friendship for what it really was, and he was free in heart and mind to love Kagome with all of his loyal soul. He just wasn't free to make it physical yet or to mate her as he wished until her own soul wish had been granted. So he learned what frustration was along with the object of his desire.

But then they learned the small details of courtship, instead of being thrown in at the deep end as they had been when Kagome had first touched him, as she petted his ears while he was still sleeping on Goshinboku. He still didn't think she realised how closely or exactly where she had pressed her face when the villager's arrows came either.

One day he would tell her and see how she blushed then; at least then he'd had had other things on his mind or he might have commented, and lost a beautiful friendship before it had truly started.

Now it was fun to flirt, stolen glances when no one else could see and shy smiles that set his heart fluttering. He couldn't help but remember when he and Kikyou had been at the same place in time, her smiles were gentle but always sad or wistful, whereas Kagome's held joy and mischief. He delighted in catching the girl unawares to see the colour wash her cheeks and make her eyes sparkle.

Brushing against her fingers with his own quickly, when she handed in her book or regained her homework, small and rare comments where he knew she would hear the hidden meaning. The true pleasure she got from his genuine written teacher's comments on her homework or coursework, when she had worked hard and progressed.

They were obviously not love letters but they were sincere, Inuyasha took his work seriously and never gave false praise; certainly not to her. He was a fine teacher, fun and enthusiastic for his subject, which rubbed off on the students in all his classes; but he was unfailingly firm and brooked no slacking or misbehaviour.

Once when he was informing a male student that he was cheating his parents and himself as well as his school, by messing about and not using his intelligence to its full capabilities, Kagome knew that she was witnessing a Sesshoumaru moment, with his errant brother. The end result was the same too and Inuyasha allowed the boy to go outside to compose himself. It had worked, the boy's attitude changed and Inuyasha was equally generous with his praise.

For Kagome everything was an eye opener and she was falling in love with Inuyasha all over again, only this time it was with a far deeper and trusting feeling. She still adored the young and brash boy she had loved first; but now she was finding out the true nature of that boy's promise, in the man she was coming to know.

She could see the smouldering desire in his eyes whether amber or violet, he no longer had to hide it when they were alone, afraid of saying or doing something he was unable to fulfil. Now his gaze was full of promise and she found everything far more exciting than before. Even his body had changed and although she had known every contour of his upper body before, when she had bandaged and nursed him; he had grown and filled out.

He was strange again, mysterious and if her thoughts wandered too far, she knew that he was now fully a man and not her skinny hanyou boy. But she could not tempt him to go any further than holding her hand or giving her a squeeze, he was obedient to his Sesshpapa. They knew it was for both their benefits that they did not cheat, not that they could at school and they were usually well chaperoned the rest of the time.

She did not want him to let go of his standards really and the waiting was exciting too; making the infrequent closeness they could enjoy, all the more valuable. For example the day that she was walking alongside Eri and the girl's heel broke, making her stumble into Kagome at the top of a flight of stairs. Before either girl could fall headlong down the stairs, they both found themselves held upright by the dark haired Mr Shiroinu.

Eri found herself the envy of at least half the school, including Kagome, as Inuyasha carried her to the nurse, where it was found she had a nasty twist to her ankle. Kagome went with them as she had bruised her side when she was pushed against the stair rail. As both the twist and bruise were nasty, the nurse sent the girls home; Inuyasha offered to take them both in his car as he was off for half a day.

The girl's mothers were rung and both agreed gratefully to have them brought home. Inuyasha dropped off Eri first as she needed to get her foot elevated and he also wanted a cup of tea in the familiar shrine kitchen. As he stopped the car at the foot of the shrine steps he chuckled at his remaining passenger getting her mildly annoyed.

But he redeemed himself when he picked her up and carried her gently mindful of her bruised side. Kagome could have stayed like that forever, feeling his strong heartbeat near her and his warmth and confident strength. Inuyasha chuckled again, he knew what was going through her mind but he chose not to embarrass her over it. Not that it stopped him from whispering;

"This reminds me of old times eh wench? Still getting into trouble, even if it wasn't of your own making, it still finds you. Just as well I was hanging around again wasn't it?" He chuckled again as he felt her bristle at his insinuation, but then she too started to laugh.

"I'm always glad you are there Inuyasha, you have never let me fall. Thanks for stopping us fall down those stairs; I dread to think what would have happened." Then her smiles turned to shakes as the reaction set in. Inuyasha called out to Mama in the same way he had always done in the past, alerting her to trouble of one sort or the other.

Soon Kagome was settled with a cup of sweet tea and her mother had rung the school immediately, confirming that Kagome had been brought home safely. It was just like old times Mama thought; Inuyasha's concern in the way he sat and watched Kagome intently had not changed one iota since the days of their quest. Even in the way he sat on her floor until she had gone to sleep after she had bathed and had pain killers for the large bruise that had turned her side black and blue.

Mama invited him to stay for the evening meal, knowing that he would not be fully happy until he had seen her daughter after her sleep. Sesshoumaru too agreed, when Inuyasha rang to tell him that he would be late and was eating at the Higurashi's. The Daiyoukai also realised that Inuyasha's youkai would not be appeased until he knew that his future mate was comfortable from her injury.

At dinner Kagome was very stiff from her bruise and she lay on the settee to eat leaning up on Inuyasha as he sat with his arm round her offering support. Mama didn't have the heart to advise against it. They were so peaceful and happy just in one another's company, that Mama stopped Souta from going in and disturbing them.

She also turned a blind eye when Inuyasha kissed Kagome's head and then claimed her lips. But she went to stop him moving in again for a second kiss, only to find that his eyes were turning reddish gold. His youkai was close to the surface because his mate was in pain and he was trying to console her. Thankfully there was a knock on the door, and Kouga was standing there with a large bouquet of flowers for the invalid.

He came in and went straight to Kagome ignoring the barely swallowed soft growls from Inuyasha until he growled back in their common canine language, telling the pup to stand down. The youkai recognised Kouga's authority over him in his brother's place and Inuyasha's eyes returned to their normal hue. Kouga growled again _'Good Pup'_ and presented the flowers to Kagome.

"I am merely the messenger from Sesshoumaru and Hanataba, who were sorry to hear of your injury Kagome and who sent you these flowers. I do however add my own wishes for your speedy recovery. I know that bruised ribs hurt like the devil when you breathe."

Kagome smiled and sent her thanks back; the flowers were beautiful and Mama came to put them in a vase for her. She had to marvel at Sesshoumaru's foresight, he must have suspected what would be the likely effect of Kagome's injury on his brother; but then he was experienced and seemed to have eyes in the back of his head when it came to Inuyasha. She supposed that all good parents did know most of the time, how their children would react in a given situation.

Later that evening Kouga and Inuyasha bade their farewells and left to go home, the hanyou was subdued because he thought that he would be in trouble for his lapse of control. But he was wrong, Sesshoumaru although recognising by scent most of all that happened between Inuyasha and Kagome, was pleased that the boy's youkai had recognised Kouga and had done as he was told.

It was perfectly understandable that his youkai was insistent that Kagome was comfortable; it was how a good mate should act. Sesshoumaru also knew that Inuyasha would spend the next few evenings round at the shrine, compelled by his youkai to see that his future mate was mending; although the youkai was unlikely to surface again. Mama did however have a quick dial number she could use to get Sesshoumaru, if ever she needed.

It was a week until Kagome was cleared for school again by the doctor and Inuyasha had visited every day, but there had been no repeat performances of the first time. He had only permitted himself a kiss to her head and brief hug as he left as well, not wanting to further arouse either of them beyond the agreement of both families.

The next week Mama and Kyouko announced that they would be having a civil marriage ceremony to mark the human aspect of mating which would happen the night before as in both their eyes, the youkai mating was more binding than the human arrangement. They would spend the mating night in a hotel and then after the civil service they would go on an extended honeymoon. Sesshoumaru and Hanataba would host a feast in their honour before the first mating.

There was actually no need to delay beyond booking the civil service and that was determined for the Saturday after next, plenty of time to gain a honeymoon suite in the best hotel that always kept an open reservation for Sesshoumaru. Getting to any holiday destination would be no problem either as Kyouko like all Inuyoukai could produce a youki cloud and fly.

If however they decided to go further afield than Mama would be happy with, flying alongside her mate only; tickets for an aeroplane would likewise be no problem. Neither Mama nor Kyouko wanted a big ceremony, they would be happy with just the family for the party and the two obligatory witnesses for the civil ceremony. But they would have Sesshoumaru and Hanataba, Kagome and Souta, plus Inuyasha and Grandpa there and that was all.

Friday was a beautiful, clear and hot; perfect for the garden party planned for Mama and Kyouko's mating feast. Mama already knew that there would be many people there that she didn't know herself but Kyouko did; some were invited dignitaries because it was important that diplomacy was seen to be in effect. Kyouko was an important youkai and had been single for so many years that it was surprising to find him 'caught' at last.

Mama was unfazed however by the list of officials who were present; none of them were too intimidating for her and she shone like a beacon, she was happy and didn't mind that everyone could tell. This endeared her to all as she smiled and spoke naturally; most commented to Kyouko that he had landed on his feet where his female was concerned.

Mama was already feeling the benefit of the preliminary mate mark; her energy levels didn't wane as she danced the evening away with many partners who were entranced by her smile. She looked every inch a social butterfly in her dress of blue and green that floated around her intriguingly; but it was noted by all that her smile only grew bigger when she was in the arms of her soon to be mate.

Towards the end of the evening and just before the couple were due to leave, Mama was dancing a last dance with Sesshoumaru and she thanked him for the wonderful party. But she laughed as she also said she would never have believed when her daughter first fell through the well, all that had transpired since then. Especially the tales she heard from both Kagome and Inuyasha about the Western Lord.

"You are a remarkable woman yourself Amai; you gave Inuyasha your trust when you lent him Kagome. Nobody had done that before and it meant more to him than you ever have realised. I knew back then that someone else was being kind to him; he used to speak to the Neko in the small hours when he kept guard over his pack. You gave him comfort even over the distance of time and he loved to come to you if he was hurt and wanted to be babied.

"I watched over him many times and always on his human night. He never knew of course, he looks so like his mother as a human and his father as a hanyou. I will always be in your debt for adding him to your family at the time and for helping him keep his love for me alive as I know you did, encouraging him to always hope. You have been a comfort for both of us now and I am glad to welcome you to the family…sister."

Sesshoumaru smiled and kissed her hand as Kyouko came to take her away; slipping past all the guests and just sparing a smile and glance at her children and Grandpa who were waiting. Amai left the gathering to become mate to Kyouko and later that evening, Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru grinned at each other and then at Hanataba as they felt the full exchange of youkai. Nothing was secret in their world for long.

The next day saw the civil ceremony; short and sweet though it was, it meant very little to any of the people there. The real meaning was in the mark left on the neck and shoulder of the new mate of Kyouko and the proud way she carried herself, secure in the love of a good man. She knew he valued her as she did him and as they headed off for an unknown destination, no one doubted that they would be happy.

TBC


	17. Returns and New Life

Chapter 17 Returns and New Life

While Mama and Kyouko were away on their honeymoon, which could have been anywhere at all considering that Kyouko could go wherever the mood took them; Sesshoumaru had lent a housekeeper come cook to the shrine. This served two purposes; one it saved a hardworking Kagome from having to do the general housework and feeding the family, and the other was that if Inuyasha did pop in to check on them all, there would be someone responsible around the young pair.

Grandpa didn't count, he was too often found to be taking a nap and Souta could be bribed/persuaded to go away. It wasn't that Sesshoumaru didn't trust Kagome or Inuyasha to behave, but he did know how easily opportunities could arise that might make them forget their good intentions. Besides the Youkai Lord didn't relish the idea of explaining the possible results of such mischief to an irate mama who was now his sister-in-law.

The housekeeper was very efficient and a brilliant cook who enjoyed her work. She soon fit in with the family's routine and became a part of their lives very quickly. She was quiet and unassuming but invaluable, she was a Bat Youkai with amazing hearing and other senses; she had no trouble at all in detecting Inuyasha making any moves on Kagome.

She always came in with refreshments for them at the most inopportune time as far as they were concerned; or questions or dusting or some other household necessity that interrupted any of their most innocent of activities. She was so effective that for the whole time that Mama was away, Inuyasha only managed to get in one or two kisses that were not on Kagome's forehead. The most physical he got was to place his arm around her shoulders when they were sitting on the sofa together.

Kagome didn't mind too much, there was more excitement in the quick snatches of romance that they had, than she had thought possible and her eyes shone brightly as she laughed at her frustrated Romeo. Poor Inuyasha was only able to see her for an hour after school, every other day or so; Sesshoumaru made sure of that, after all Kagome was his step niece now and he was a very protective if not amused, uncle.

Mama and Kyouko were away for three weeks and when they returned nobody could doubt they had had a wonderful time. Mama looked wonderfully relaxed and ten years younger at least; there was a spring in her step and sparkle in her eyes that had been missing in recent years. She had always been cheerful and had put up a marvellous front for all that time; but now all could see the genuine happiness and realised just how much Mama had always given of herself.

Everyone was interested in hearing about where they had been and what they had seen, and the dinner that Hanataba gave the couple to welcome them home was lively, as everyone asked questions and viewed the photos that they had taken on the big screen.

Later that evening, Mama came over to Kagome, she had already greeted her children happily and had spoken with Grandpa but now she wished to speak with her daughter more privately. However before she could say anything Kagome hugged her again and said;

"You look incredible Mama; you are truly happy aren't you? Kyouko has my grateful thanks for what he has done for you."

"Yes Kagome, I feel that I'm more alive somehow, don't misunderstand me though; I have never grudged for one second my family, but it is nice to be treated like a woman again and not just a mother."

"More so than with our father?" Kagome did not often mention her and Souta's father as he was a painful subject. But Mama nodded.

"I had some wonderful times with your father, but we were so different in temperament that our relationship could never be as easy as I find it with Kyouko. I do not have to worry that I will upset or offend however unintentionally, as I did sometimes with your father."

"Mama, you are the most inoffensive person I know."

"Well perhaps age has helped me mellow a bit and Kyouko is not so quick to misunderstand. We get on really well Kagome, and he is the best thing apart from having my family including Inuyasha, that has ever happened to me." She then gave Kagome another hug and was herself embraced by Kyouko who put his arms round the both of them.

"I promise too that you my girls, will never want for anything while I have breath in my body and that Souta and your Grandfather too will be protected for as long as I can do so. Amai's family is now mine too and I hope to prove myself to you all."

"You already have Kyouko; I have never seen Mama look so well or happy." Kagome suddenly felt very warm and happy herself as she realised that she too, was already a part of this close extended family now. Her smiles were met by Inuyasha's shining eyes and a look that took her breath away; not that they could indulge in anything more meaningful under the watchful care of parents and uncles etc.

Barely a week after the newly mated pair had settled into a routine of living at the shrine and in Kyouko's quarters at the Manor, Hanataba went into labour. As this obviously wasn't her first pregnancy, she didn't get panicked or flustered, taking the whole thing in her stride. The same could not be said for the men in her life.

Her sons were all waiting in collective agony wondering what they could do to help and getting in everyone's way; whereas Sesshoumaru was outwardly calm, although his markings had paled. The girls were also keeping out of the way as the doctors and Hanataba prepared for the birth. Mama had been in to see her sister-in-law and was keeping her entertained by the antics going on outside.

She made the expectant mother laugh; previously no one had been in a position to let her know what was happening with the rest of the family and she found that having an experienced sister who was calm and didn't fuss, was a positive advantage. Even Sesshoumaru welcomed the presence and distraction of Amai in the birthing room; although she would leave before the baby came, to leave the parents and midwives alone.

They didn't have long to wait before the wail of a newborn child rent the air and the new little sister made her appearance and was handed over to her Papa. Just like their first daughter, this pup had no markings on her body; just the silver hair that already shone with blue highlights. She too looked liked Inuyasha except of course for the ears. No matter how many times this miracle happened, Sesshoumaru was always in awe of the new life his mate had brought into the world.

It was perhaps one of the most inexplicable things to him, how each pup tugged on his heart and bonded itself instantly. His desire to protect was strengthened yet again and he sent fervent thanks to his father for his wisdom in knowing that his belligerent son would one day understand the father.

While he admired his new pup and mused on his father's last words to him once again; his attention was drawn to the loud gasp of his mate and the swift movement from the midwives. Apparently, Hanataba was not finished; suddenly she gave a great push and another pup was born, to everyone's great surprise. Sesshoumaru just stared down at the newest pup when the midwife handed it to him and the whole bonding process happened again.

This was another son who was identical to his sire in colouring and markings; and as he stared at the small boy, Sesshoumaru knew that he would never live this down. He the Great Daiyoukai of the West, after having sired a whole brood of pups; had not been able to tell his mate was carrying twins again. The others would be having a field day already before he stepped one foot out of the birthing room, as they would now be aware that there were two new pups.

After he had made sure that Hanataba was well and she had fed the pups then settled down for a rest, Sesshoumaru took his latest offspring out to meet their siblings, who were crowding around the door. Sure enough identical wide grins were on all the faces; it was astounding how alike they all looked, daughters and sons when the joke was on him. The biggest grin though was on Inuyasha's face and predictably he was the first to laugh.

Sesshoumaru put an end to the sniggering and laughter by placing the pups in Inuyasha's arms; he was entitled to the first hold and had claimed such right from the birth of the first litter. Only then Inuyasha had had to sit on Sesshoumaru's lap and sit quietly, before Hanataba placed the pups, one at a time in his careful little paws. Now of course he could take both at once without Sesshoumaru's help, which he did; his sense of wonder no different now than when he had held his brother's very first baby.

"Wow Sesshpapa, ten pups; it's amazing…sometimes when I remember…it's great, they'll always have each other, you've done a great job with them all." Inuyasha was rambling a bit, but his brother heard what he was saying loud and clear.

"I think you miscounted Inuyasha, I now have eleven pups; I may not be your physical sire but I am as proud of you as if I was, and I know that father would have been as well. However unusual our relationship Little One, I treasure it and you."

"I know Sesshpapa, I meant no harm."

"This I understand pup, now how about letting the others see our little surprise and her hidden secret."

"Is that going to be their names?"

"I do not know yet, I have yet to speak to your Hanamama. It is what came to mind when I saw what had happened. The boy was hidden by his sister so she had a surprise. I think it might be apt." Sesshoumaru watched as the new pups were handed round between their brothers and sisters. The babies were alert and secure, having known the youki and voices of their siblings from inside the womb. The older ones though were fascinated by the new ones; noting their features and the markings on the boy, then committing their looks and scents to mind.

The Daiyoukai was proud of his family, all of them were there to welcome the newest additions and there was no disharmony. He felt sad inside that his beloved father couldn't see them all now, as he would surely have wished his children and grandchildren to be this way. There was no one who truly knew how much he missed his father; how could they it was so long ago? But the General had been such a large presence and yet a very loving parent.

Suddenly there was a gentle nudging at his chin and Inuyasha was pushing his face up, wanting attention. He had noticed that Sesshoumaru seemed far away and his aura had saddened which as always unnerved the younger brother; the Youkai responded as always by petting his brother's ears which was calming to both of them.

Sesshoumaru was brought back to reality by Inuyasha; his baby brother knew what it was to lose a parent's love and protection in the same way that he had, and had paid a heavier price throughout his earlier life. He may not have had his mother for so long but it too was an exclusive relationship while it lasted and their sense of loss was not relative. He answered his brother's whine with a reassuring rumble and hugged him before going to reclaim his tiny pups.

Later on after the pups and their mother were completely rested, they came to the huge living room to be introduced to the rest of the company and the servants, all of whom were eager to meet Ikkyou and her brother Hitoshirezu. Kagome had a small jolt when she heard the name of the little girl pup but a quick glance at Inuyasha showed he had not reacted to the name; it just sounded so like Kikyou even if the meaning was different.

As it was Inuyasha was so happy over the new arrivals that his eyes were glowing with love for them and his family. Kagome felt privileged to see this side of him; relaxed, excited and in the centre of his family. Everyone was right, this was what he deserved and wanted through both his lives and now Sesshoumaru had provided it; all of it. Her last vestiges of concern vanished, unable to withstand the evidence before her.

She tuned out the well wishes and moderate teasing of the Daiyoukai for not knowing about his new son, as Inuyasha came towards her carrying the baby girl and offered her to Kagome. She took the small pup in wonder; this was the first youkai baby she had seen close too and the child was a small living doll. The golden eyes gleamed up at her taking interest in all the new things around her; she was vaguely familiar with Kagome's voice by now and reached for her hair with tiny perfectly clawed fingers.

"You would have looked just like this Inuyasha; your Mama must have been so full of love for you." Kagome whispered and her eyes filled as she imagined Izayoi with her tiny son. I would have loved you." She was lost for a short moment in her mind and neither of them noticed Sesshoumaru's gaze as he too could see the dark haired human girl holding his silver haired pup as a disturbing vision of the past.

Although Rin too had held the first girl pup, she had only been a child when Shami had been born; not an adult, whereas Kagome was the same age as Izayoi when she had birthed her hanyou child. But before the vision could grab a detrimental hold on either of them, Inuyasha broke into their musings;

"Feh! Kagome, I wasn't a girl and besides Ikkyou has proper ears see, these dinky little pointed things are nothing like the monstrous things my mother had to put up with. This pup will never bring her mother the shame I did to mine." He had barely finished speaking when he received a hard slap to the face from an angry Rin who was tearfully glaring at him.

"How dare you think for one moment that your Mama was ever ashamed of you. She never hid you away did she? She was always outside with you when you were at play and tried to shield you from harm. Izayoi may not have been able to do much for you in the short time she had you but she was never ashamed. You were her pride and joy and she loved you dearly; making sure you were always clean and well groomed. She loved to see your ears as they perked up following every sound. Don't demean her love Inuyasha, it is unworthy of you."

Everyone was staring at the little scene until Hanataba took the pressure off them by asking for her babies. Meanwhile Sesshoumaru had approached and taken both his brother and adopted daughter in hand.

"That was uncalled for Rin."

"No it wasn't, it's time he learnt that nobody cares that he has differences anymore." She was still angry or else she would never have spoken in such defiance to Sesshoumaru.

"It's O.K. Sesshpapa; I'm sorry Rin." Inuyasha said quietly and pulled away to go and clear his mind outside and make his apologies in his heart to his mother. Rin waited a few moments before she followed him, they were both watched by Sesshoumaru and Kagome.

"Crumbs, it was as if Rin was his mother the way she flew at him, although she just reached him before I did." Kagome remarked. Her own mother came over at that point and just said;

"I presume neither of them knows?" To which Sesshoumaru enigmatically answered;

"No." He was unsurprised that Amai was that intuitive and didn't bother this time to deny the obvious to himself either. Kagome looked as though the light had finally dawned on her too which Sesshoumaru noticed with some concern.

"You mean that Rin is...?"

"It serves no purpose Kagome to speculate further. Please do not voice your idea to anybody, least of all Inuyasha and Rin."

"Don't worry Sesshoumaru; I know only too well what problems can arise around Inuyasha and reincarnations, to open that can of worms." She smiled though and Sesshoumaru felt relief; the girl was a Miko and sensible after all and he had temporarily forgotten her past.

"Quite." He replied as she looked out after them. To Kagome it explained so much; from the very first time that Rin had tipped water over the ferocious Youkai Lord, cautious but unafraid and it explained the compulsion Sesshoumaru had to bring the child back to life. He was merely trying to right a wrong committed in the past, that his honour was unable to leave unresolved.

Outside in the garden, Rin had caught up with Inuyasha and touched his face gently where the redness of her slap still stained his cheek. She smiled at him ignoring the shine of tears in his eyes that her reprimand had called forth and ruffled his ears.

"I am sorry Inuyasha; it's just that all my kits have beautiful ears like my first baby and I know that Izayoi without a shadow of a doubt, loved you with all her heart, ears and all."

"I know that too Rin Mama." Inuyasha said; resorting to the old play name he had for her sometimes. "All you females like my ears for some strange reason; it's just that for so long…it sometimes comes back when I don't realise, that's all."

"Ready to come back in and stop Kagome worrying that I'll take a hairbrush to you again?"

"She doesn't know about that, does she?"

"No, she would have mentioned it if she did, or been after me with one of her arrows." Rin laughed and Inuyasha joined in as they went back inside to have something to eat. Seeing them together now; it was obvious to the casual observers that the fates had balanced up the wrong committed on the mother and child so long ago.

TBC


	18. Picnic Confessions

Chapter 18 Picnic Confessions

It was one of those blissful balmy days of early summer; neither too hot nor cold with no cool breeze to take out the heat that was just right. The new twins were a month old and Kagome's finals were starting after the weekend. She had done all she could do now in preparation for this time and Inuyasha had decided that she needed to relax before her exams started. This was no real problem and she was staying at the Manor along with the rest of her family.

Inuyasha had taken her on a picnic in the grounds of the Western Manor with the blessings of their parents and a basket made up in the kitchens; full of wonderful food. It was just the two of them for once and the freedom was welcome. So far the opportunity to just be themselves had not arisen and Kagome was looking forward to being able to talk alone with her hanyou, she had many questions she would like answers to.

They did not know, nor would they need to know, that the pair of magpies who were following them were to watch over the pair and set up a horrible screeching and cawing if they went too far over the bounds set by careful guardians. The noise would alert the guards who would then have to go and see what had caused the fuss in the first place. Other than that the couple were free for the day to take pleasure in talking, relaxing and enjoying their picnic.

At first they walked hand in hand silently and feeling incredibly self conscious, until they found a nice sunny spot in the furthest western corner of the grounds. There were trees forming an avenue to a sunny glade with a large Koi pond; which was the perfect place to spread out the blanket and picnic hamper. The awkward silence soon dissipated as the food was served and memories of camping in the woods and open spaces of the feudal system started to fill it.

For Kagome the memories they conjured were bitter sweet, as she knew that Sango and Miroku were long gone in the past and she could no longer get to see the pair she had loved like a brother and sister. But Inuyasha was able to fill her in on the rest of their lives besides his visits to elderly Kaede who always spoiled him, and he had many stories from when he knew them as a special aunt and uncle.

He remembered being thrilled with the tales of the jewel shard hunters; as all small boys are of adventures and death defying stunts. He told her that Sango let him try to pick up and throw Hiraikotsu and when months later he finally managed it, she had said that he would have done well with them on their quest. He had been so proud and had to show off to Shippou and Sesshoumaru, who had been suitably impressed.

Kagome couldn't get enough; she absorbed his tales with as much enthusiasm as he had those of the Monk and Slayer. She laughed out loud when Inuyasha told her that Miroku had also liked to stroke his puppy ears when he was telling the tales of daring as the small hanyou had sat on his lap. Although he had given the poor excuse that it was because it made Inuyasha sleepy and easier to put to bed.

She was also astounded that no one had ever given the game away to the infant hanyou; or slipped up when telling the tales, especially Shippou. Inuyasha explained it wouldn't have mattered if they had, he would not have understood what had really happened; he just knew that the hanyou in the tales was _'like Inuyasha'_. Shippou enjoyed being his 'older brother' teaching him lots of new things and how to get into mischief, although that usually backfired as it was obvious that it was the kitsune who was the instigator behind a lot of the wrongdoing.

They chatted easily together and neither found it hard to refrain from intimacies they were not yet entitled too; not because the desire was lacking, but because for the first time they were able to just be themselves to talk and get to know each other. There was none of the lecherous Miroku's insinuations, nor Sango's well meant fears about Kikyou, to cause any misunderstandings.

But above all, there were no crippling insecurities or feelings of inadequacy, or even lack of worth anymore from Inuyasha. Only two young people on a journey now of discovery, that proved to them both that they could discuss without fighting, being 'sat' or running away. As the afternoon progressed and the remnants of the picnic were nibbled away by the couple, Inuyasha pulled the girl into his lap.

This was not in itself enough to set off the alarm from the watchful magpies; neither was the light kiss he placed on her forehead, nor the tight but gentle grip he held her with. She snuggled her back into his chest comfortably and leaned her head on his shoulder; while he absentmindedly stroked her hair.

"Are you more contented now Kagome, at how I am I mean? You understand more how I have lived?"

"I think so Inuyasha; it was just very strange when I first came back, I mean you and Kouga had still been fighting over me and Sesshoumaru had only just accepted you. I came back here and found out that not only was Kouga your fond uncle but Sesshoumaru was your devoted father. It was very strange to me and so were you, but I do understand and they have all done a great job in bringing you up and giving you the life you deserve."

"Truly Kagome?"

"Yes Inuyasha, truly; but tell me yourself, wasn't it strange when your memories came back? What happened?"

"Feh! They came back that's all, Sesshpapa stayed with me while I assimilated the old with the new. It was a bit awkward at first coming face to face with Kouga and Shippou, with the old memories so fresh… but they soon fitted back into the way of life I'd come to know. What I mean is, I remember now about Kouga and little Shippou an' everything; but it's not so real, as how I see them now."

What about me Inuyasha, am I such a long way off to you now?"

"No, it's different; I've had no new memories to replace the old ones of you or Mama. I do remember the girl whose name I asked for, and I remember her scent; but that is all I do from my new time." He snuffled in her hair smiling at her familiar scent and remembering when it had been the only thing to keep him sane sometimes on their quest.

Inuyasha suddenly became aware that Kagome was finding something amusing. Her shoulders were shaking with suppressed mirth and he had to know the cause; but Kagome would not say. So he resorted to tickling her and soon she was breathless and lying down in his arms as her breathing returned to normal.

"It's only that out of all this, I find the notion of you and _'Uncle Kouga'_ the strangest thing to grasp. One minute you are all teeth and claws with one another and the next he can spank you."

"I was a small pup then Kagome, all children require discipline, youkai pups sometimes need a more physical approach for the sake of teaching the youkai that responds to strength."

"I understand Inuyasha and I have no problem with it and besides, I understand too why Sesshoumaru couldn't do it himself."

"No one has said he couldn't Kagome, I've stared at the floor from over Sesshpapa's knees before. He didn't like to do it; preferring to tell me off, but I earned it a few times from his hand."

"What on earth did you do? Everyone says what a good little boy you were; well most of the time."

"I was, but I wasn't perfect; I wasn't so little either."

"Tell me; what on earth did you do? At first Kagome thought he wouldn't say; his face had reddened and he looked sad, as the memory still caused him to feel shamed. She told him not to mind, she did not mean to embarrass him, but Inuyasha shook his head and said it was alright.

_FLASHBACK_

Inuyasha was the oldest pup (apart from Shippou and Rin) of Sesshoumaru's five pups, and they all looked to him as an example. He always had time for them and was a natural leader in their games even recognising the strengths of the youngest girl pup, who was small enough to get into any nook or cranny and therefore good for surveillance. They were often to be seen around the garden and in the trees where they were tolerated as long as no damage was done to the blossom.

Most of the time they were doing no harm with their play and they all respected Sesshoumaru's restrictions of where they could go. None were allowed beyond the sight of their nurses' keen eyes including Inuyasha, as they were too young and inexperienced yet to leave the grounds. Inuyasha did not like the restriction; he was the eldest and no longer a small whelp and he remembered looking after himself for a few weeks after his mother passed away.

But he did not go against his father in the matter, until one day he heard an excited Shippou discussing the excursion planned by the Kitsune captain for training manoeuvres in the forest. Shippou was to go along and learn stealth, tracking and hunting skills with them and Inuyasha wanted to go as well.

He ran to plead his case to Sesshoumaru who categorically refused his permission and who was unmoved by Inuyasha's retort that he was older than Shippou when the kitsune kit travelled with the shard hunters. Sesshoumaru merely stated that Shippou's early life had been forced on him by circumstance and Inuyasha was not yet ready or old enough for that sort of trial.

Inuyasha knew that his father had made up his mind and that it would not be changed. He ran off fuming and went to sulk in the den that the pups had made in one of the unused rooms of the Palace. He was not alone for long; his faithful little sibling pack followed him and were standing around listening to his outburst.

They didn't fully understand all the emotion that Inuyasha was feeling; nor why he was stomping around making a lot of noise. The older ones could understand the disappointment of not being able to do something they had their hearts set on, but once Sesshpapa had spoken his decision there was no gainsaying it. Therefore it was always incumbent upon them to find something else to do and learn how to deal with it, if their father said 'No'.

If the younger ones knew this and acted on it, they couldn't see why Inuyasha was fussing. Father never said anything unless it had been considered and didn't he know what was best? Inuyasha got angrier at the rational way Shami spoke sometimes; he was the eldest and if he wanted to get cross and angry, feeling that Sesshpapa was unfair, then he could.

Besides why should he listen to Sesshpapa anyway? He was not his pup; Inuyasha was the Youkai Lord's brother, his equal and could therefore decide on his own what he wanted to do. Inuyasha stood and impressed on his siblings that only they had to obey their father; he did not. Having made that declaration, he invited them to all go out and play.

For the rest of the week Inuyasha was his normal happy playful self with boundless energy; he was taller than his siblings, looking like any normal thirteen year old had he been totally human. He had lived for more than thirteen years in reality; youkai aging had finally slowed him down. But he had the mental reasoning of thirteen as well, in other words he could see no other reasons but his own, and he was convinced he was right.

No one noticed the silent hanyou following at a safe enough distance when the Kitsunes finally departed. The small group including Shippou; were silent too, it was imperative that they were for this operation which had been scheduled to take three days. There was no danger of Inuyasha giving them away; he had learned long ago to be soundless as he moved.

For the first day Inuyasha followed and listened and learned; watching Shippou use his fox magic to great effect. But he was so engrossed in watching the others that he forgot to watch out behind him; suddenly there was a growl and he was grabbed in a huge mouth with sharp teeth that gripped him tightly. Inuyasha shrieked, alerting the Kitsunes to his presence; although they had already turned as they sensed the youkai.

Inuyasha was terrified; the monster was huge and he could feel the immense power of its youki, he also knew that no one could possibly rescue him before the creature closed his jaws and bit him in half. That knowledge however didn't stop the hanyou from wailing for his brother to come; even as the Kitsunes far below had backed off and left Inuyasha to his fate. Hopelessly frightened now that his hope of rescue was gone, Inuyasha just squirmed; causing the jaws to toss him in the air where he flailed his arms before coming down to a fairly soft landing on the creature's furry foot.

He could just make out through teary eyes that the huge head of the creature was coming near him again, the jaws widening to show the sharp fangs and he could see his pathetic figure reflected in the doleful red and green eyes. Inuyasha knew that his time had come and although he drew his claws ready for attack, he realised that he had no hope of doing enough damage to prevent his death.

The huge youkai then snaked his tongue out and swiped away the tears from the hanyou's face with one lick and Inuyasha noticed for the first time the blue crescent on its forehead. Before he could put two and two together however, the massive dog had morphed into the familiar figure of Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha had never seen his brother's youkai form until now and he was still afraid, until his Sesshpapa opened his arms to the chastened boy inviting him to go to him. Wrapped in the warm embrace of his brother Inuyasha felt safe again, but he knew this was not the end.

Sesshoumaru called the Kitsune captain over and discussed their leaving again in a few days as their silence had been disturbed this time. This was said to make Inuyasha feel the full weight of his disobedience, for in truth, Sesshoumaru had known that Inuyasha would follow the group and had planned on teaching him a lesson. The captain had brought forward the day of the exercise to accommodate his Lord in the matter.

While Sesshoumaru and the captain conversed in tones too soft for Inuyasha to hear, Shippou approached him. He called him a _'silly little fool'_ for defying his brother and told him that he would surely be punished for this. But Inuyasha rejected the notion; his brother had hugged him, only too pleased to see him safe, so he would only get a lecture but he knew he deserved that along with the fright.

Sesshoumaru came back and picked up Inuyasha tucking him under his arm and summoning his youki cloud, the pair flew back to the Palace where Inuyasha was given over to his servants to bathe and get ready for bed. Inuyasha pouted, it was not his bed time and besides he was hungry, but before he could object Sesshoumaru told him that he was in deep trouble.

Fresh from his bath and only wearing a short sleeping yukata, Inuyasha came to his room to find that food had been brought to him and Sesshoumaru was waiting for him to eat. While he did so, Sesshoumaru explained some salient points to him. Namely that whether or not Inuyasha was his son, it mattered not when it came to his obedience to his alpha.

Inuyasha was also still under his brother's guardianship too and Sesshoumaru was extremely disappointed in the pup's behaviour, let alone hurt at the rejection. Although he did understand, knowing that all young growing creatures will push their limits; however just because Sesshoumaru usually refrained from physically punishing Inuyasha didn't mean that he wouldn't do it if necessary. It was his responsibility to correct the whelp and he meant to do it this time.

Inuyasha soon found himself in the unenviable position of being pulled over his brother's lap and staring at the floor, while Sesshoumaru blistered his naked bottom in a severe spanking the boy would not forget. Inuyasha found it hard to get his breath at first but was soon sobbing for Sesshoumaru to stop; then when it was over, he was held in his brother's arms until he had calmed down.

Then he was told that he would have to apologise for spoiling the Kitsune captain's excursion and take whatever punishment he saw fit. Sesshoumaru left him in his room to consider the apology he needed to make. The kitsunes arrived a couple of hours later, and Inuyasha was ready to say he was sorry and when the captain was summoned to his room he could tell that the boy was sincere.

However the annoying whelp had wrecked good schemes planned for months and now the party would have to go further afield to practice, as the local wildlife had been too disturbed by the actions of the hanyou. The captain had Inuyasha lean over his dresser and whipped him on the top of his thighs, six strokes with a willow wand. It was not severe in itself, the captain had taken into account that the pup had already been thoroughly spanked; but as far as Inuyasha was concerned, he felt on fire.

Then the captain left him with a short bow and asked Shippou in to escort the Young Prince back to his brother in the next room, once the captain had reported. Shippou was then left alone with an obviously contrite and extremely sore Inuyasha, but before he could say anything or take Inuyasha anywhere, Sesshoumaru came to him. Shippou left discreetly as Inuyasha burst into fresh tears as his brother took him in his arms to comfort him, knowing the pup needed to know he'd been forgiven.

_END FLASHBACK_

"Sesshpapa told me again how foolish I had been; if he had been any other youkai I would have been dead and he would do anything required to keep me safe, and if he ever needed to repeat the lesson to be assured he would do so."

"Did he ever have to again?"

"No; well not like that. However not because of the pain of being punished although it hurt far more than Kouga's or Kyouko's wallopings; but like Shippou said to me later, I had hurt Sesshpapa by my actions and my words. I had saddened him and that upset me far more, I'd let him down and it still makes me feel bad when I remember."

"Good, that is because you love him; I understand that. I let Mama down once when I took some money from her purse. I made her cry. She explained what I had done was wrong and she slapped my legs for being deceitful when I lied about doing it; but it was her face when she found out…I vowed I never cause that expression of sadness again."

There was silence after that as each of them was lost in their thoughts for a while until they realised it was time to pack up. They put away the basket neatly and folded the blanket and only then did Sesshoumaru come out of the tree line where he had been waiting. He had come unsure of why after so long there had been no interruption of the pair by the magpies; only to hear the couple's reminiscences.

He was pleased that Inuyasha had benefited from that episode and was very proud of the way the pup had turned out. He approached now and put an arm around both of them smiling gently, and escorted them back to where the rest of the family was already indoors and waiting for them.

TBC


	19. Exams and the Prom

Chapter 19 Exams and the Prom

Later that night when all the rest of the Manor was asleep, a ghostly white figure stood on his veranda and absorbed the scents and calm of the garden. He didn't need much repose to be refreshed and often stood contemplating how life had treated him and those he cared about. Sometimes he walked through the grounds disencumbered by clothing, allowing only his hair to dance around him sensuously in any breeze.

He was not ashamed of his body and never worried about being nude, although he didn't purposely flaunt himself where others would see him. But he enjoyed the freedom to stretch and be just himself more naturally. Conforming to no one else's ideas was a luxury that didn't often come his way in these times, where he had to be more civilised than his true nature sometimes preferred. But he had to admit he also had changed; he was far more mature than the arrogant youth he had been, when the world of the time had danced to his tune when he told it to.

He ruefully remembered guiding his own pups through such times in their lives and shuddered to think how they would have turned out had they lost their father, at the same crucial time that he had. The general's blood still ran true and strong in his son's offspring and they could all be recognised as Sesshoumaru's children, needing firm guidance for them to grow up wise and not just powerful. But Sesshoumaru thought that his father would have rejoiced in his grandchildren; even though they were still young, they were shaping well.

Sesshoumaru could now cast away the last of his very secret self doubt that his father would be proud of him too, now that he had done his best with Inuyasha. He knew that Papa would be proud of both his sons and Sesshoumaru could rest content in that knowledge. It was not that Inuyasha hadn't caused him stress and worry, as he brought him up; there were many times when he wasn't sure what to do for the best with the pup. Besides, his prior guilt over the pup's first life had often made him overly wary even when Kouga had assured him this was normal in bringing up cubs.

Inuyasha's humanity that shone through so often had tested his brother greatly too at times; not because he now despised it, but because he wasn't sure how not to crush it. Or rather had not been sure; it had taken a lot of understanding to recognise that he couldn't expect Inuyasha to respond in the same way as if he had been full youkai. He remembered well the time that Inuyasha had spoken of with Kagome, and he was glad he had overheard, as it was the first time that he knew for certain that he'd handled him correctly back then.

The occasion had of course also sparked off the need for answers from his full youkai pups, who had not understood their older brother's more human reaction to being forbidden to do something. Sesshoumaru smiled when he remembered all the fuss and noise that Inuyasha had made, making it so easy to know that the pup would be disobedient. However he was pleased that he had realised Inuyasha would need the reassurance that he was still loved after he'd been punished.

He remembered how Inuyasha had felt humiliated when the other pups were informed of the consequences he'd faced; especially as Sesshoumaru held him up off the ground by the scruff in front of them, while he listed his brother's crimes and his punishment. But that too had been necessary; they had to know that Inuyasha had been wrong with what he'd said to them and had been put back in his place in the pack. The youkai was strong in all his pups and they needed to see that Sesshoumaru was the strongest, even against the unwitting youthful challenge of his brother.

Had he been his own pup Inuyasha would never need to question that the love would still be there; he would have accepted that he had done wrong and paid the price, end of story. But neither Rin nor Inuyasha could do that; both would worry and fret should Sesshoumaru not show them that they had been forgiven. He had seen both become quickly depressed when they thought that they had lost his love because of their misdemeanours at various times, and he learned to teach them that he only bothered to correct them_ because_ he loved them.

Sesshoumaru sighed; it still amazed him that he had always known how to upset and hurt, sometimes damage Inuyasha in the past without knowing or caring _why_ it did so. Yet later when he wished that time had never happened, he'd forgotten. Many of Inuyasha's childhood tears came from the pain born of sorrow that Sesshoumaru might still be angry with him, far more than any spanking he'd received. This had left Sesshoumaru bewildered, until he had thought how Rin would react in the same situation and applied his knowledge to Inuyasha.

Even now they were still the same in heart, searching his face for signs that he loved them and approved; Rin was not so obvious, she had learnt to read his face long before his little brother had the opportunity. When Inuyasha too had looked at him with those huge eyes, it was to see glared back, hatred and loathing all too often in the past; but now when Inuyasha's eyes looked with love and devotion at him, it was still with the need to see that he was cherished and sometimes, all these years later Sesshoumaru could still feel guilt.

At least this time around he had never made the mistake of equating Inuyasha's tears with weakness, and had allowed the pup to grow at his own pace and without false expectations of him. The life Inuyasha had led before had forced him into situations that he was really too young to deal with, causing the boy to grow up far too quickly. This time he was allowed to be the pup he should be and there had been no ridicule; Sesshoumaru's own pups had been taught to respect and understand the differences between them and their other siblings. This had made for a harmonious family in the long run and Sesshoumaru had never tried to hide their true relationships from any of them.

In the midst of his musings he saw another figure walking in the grounds, his ebony mane swinging in the breeze and Sesshoumaru left his balcony to join his brother. It was a frequent occurrence, especially on the night of the New Moon, when Inuyasha instinctively still sought out protection or a place to hide. He had no need to worry so much these days, but still there were those who might want to cause him harm and so it was kept a secret time.

They walked in complete harmony, Inuyasha's heart rate did not rise as it always used to when he would come across his brother before; in fact it slowed as Sesshoumaru gave him the security he still unconsciously sought. The older brother was aware of this, although the younger one was not and it gave Sesshoumaru a sense of serenity to be a haven for Inuyasha now.

Sesshoumaru stroked the pup's hair between his fingers and marvelled at how different the boy looked in this form, he was a tad slighter in body and his mood more fragile. No matter how many times it happened, it never ceased to amaze him; especially when he remembered that previously the pup had survived these nights that terrified him, alone and from the tender age of eight. Even though he had been overseen by his Sesshoumaru without his knowledge; the youkai had only given him the bare necessities of protection.

"You're thinking too hard Sesshpapa; dwelling on things long forgotten. It's not healthy." Inuyasha's softer voice chided him.

"It was not I dwelling on the past this afternoon Little One." He replied, smiling at Inuyasha's blush and pulled the boy to him;

"Yeah, but at least that's my better past isn't it? Damn, you hurt me that day."

"I meant to, you needed to learn; but if it's any consolation so long after the event, it hurt me too."

"Brought back memories for you did it, made you feel guilty?"

"Not at all, I merely meant that my palm was stinging by the time I had finished spanking you. I too should have used the switch." They both chuckled at his remark even if Inuyasha was a little sheepish over the memory; it made Sesshoumaru grin and he leaned his hand down and gently swatted Inuyasha on the backside.

"Fond memories; hmm pup?" Sesshoumaru smirked, amused by the surprised squeak from Inuyasha, caused by the indignity. "Just remember, you will always be my pup Inuyasha; always." Inuyasha snuggled up to his brother, letting the feel of Sesshoumaru's solidity make him secure on this night of unease. He could hear the steady thrum of his brother's heart and the Youkai's deep comforting growling and realised it was having a soporific effect on him.

"You're making me sleepy Sesshpapa."

"Am I really? You do surprise me pup; after all this time have you finally realised…"

"You mean…yes, you always make this sound."

"I haven't had to for a long time, but when you were smaller it was how I got you to sleep on these nights."

"I love you Sesshpapa." Inuyasha whispered drowsily and Sesshoumaru's heart soared with the heartfelt words, prompting him to pick up his brother in his arms as if he were the small pup again and carry him to his bed. Inuyasha only mildly protested at being treated like a whelp; but it was so nice he had fallen asleep before he knew it, placed on his futon and covered with a blanket.

"You are still only a pup, my Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru whispered and kissed Inuyasha's forehead, before seeking his own bed and mate.

The next few days were hectic and fraught for Kagome and those who loved her. The exams were taking their toll and she was nervous and certain of failure. Thankfully this didn't seem to affect her when she was in the exam room, as she took the few minutes before the start to meditate. Miroku's training had helped her greatly and she silently thanked him.

It also helped calm her once or twice, that Inuyasha was one of the teachers who sat with the examinees to keep an eye on things. He could not speak or acknowledge her, but just his presence was enough. It was one of the worst things for Kagome, not knowing if she had caught up enough to do justice to the tests and herself. Even though her teachers and tutors were confident that she would be fine, she was not so sure.

Then they were over and next began the interminable wait for the results to see if everything had gone according to plan and the marks would be enough for the university or college of choice. In the meantime, everyone was putting in the final touches for the Prom. In actual fact most had had their dresses and plans finalised weeks before, so now it was just the makeup and hair to sort out.

Everyone had their dates arranged too and surprise surprise, Houjou had asked Kagome to be his prom date. She had no reason to refuse, Inuyasha was out of the question of course; a teacher could not be partner to a pupil. Kagome liked Houjou well enough but he never seemed to get the message that she liked him only as a friend.

But he was always the gentleman and never asked for more than she was prepared to offer; he would be happy just to be her partner for the evening. On the evening of the prom, Kagome waited for her date to pick her up, she looked lovely in an emerald green dress, lightly applied makeup and a natural blush on her cheeks.

Houjou arrived looking very neat and tidy, not only that, he looked very grown up and handsome too; but he was not a patch on Inuyasha and Kagome stifled a sigh of regret. But she didn't have long to brood as it was time to go. Houjou had brought her a corsage of white Gardenia and fern which she pinned to her breast, at least their perfume wasn't too overpowering and once Inuyasha had scented it, he would know where she was all the time.

Kagome felt slightly guilty that she had thought to use Houjou's gift to alert Inuyasha but only slightly as she turned to say goodbye to her Mama and Kyouko, leaning on Houjou's arm. When they got to the hotel where the dance was to be held, Kagome found herself getting excited as she spotted friends and fellow pupils. At first everyone seemed like a stranger, the borrowed plumes of adulthood made everyone look different.

Excited squeals and laughter abounded as friends reunited; possibly for the last time before they all went their separate ways, in the next stage of life and therefore the atmosphere although happy, had a bitter sweet edge. Even those who had not been so close found that familiarity was now a welcome thing when they thought of taking their first steps away from home into a world of strangers.

The hotel room was decorated with school colours and there was a buffet and soft drinks table where students could get refreshment whenever they wished. Music was already playing and soon dancing and chatting was under way. Rumours were rife about who the attractive blonde girl was that Mr Shiroinu had hanging on his arm and with whom he had already been dancing.

The whispers triggered alarm bells for Kagome and she searched Inuyasha out immediately. Sure enough he was amongst a group of teachers and their partners enjoying the party. She was confused; Inuyasha had said he didn't think he would be at the prom until much later, yet here he was ahead of her and with an unknown girl. All of Kouga's daughters were dark haired or redheads even with their illusions; none that she knew of were blonde.

As the evening wore on, Kagome danced with various boys or spoke with her friends and not once did Inuyasha seem to notice she was there. Yet there was a steady queue of girls lining up for a dance with him and he did dance with each of them before returning to the side of his blonde. Well two could play the ignoring game and Kagome sought out Houjou for a dance.

Just like the first time when she had gone to the dinner dance at the Manor, Inuyasha and Kagome seemed to dance and talk with everyone except each other. Later, after all the bright lights had been softened and the music had slowed and the couples were dancing closer, the Master of Ceremonies picked up the microphone for an announcement.

"Ladies and Gentlemen; I have a request from one of the teachers at this function. Mr Shiroinu says that he has danced with all the young ladies who attend his classes and are here this evening, with the exception of one. Miss Higurashi, would you care to take your partner for the next dance please?"

Kagome turned her sparkling eyes towards the dais and there was Inuyasha, immaculate in his tuxedo with his dark mane braided neatly, holding his hand out to her. He smiled and the rest of the company applauded as she blushed; everyone thought it a good joke. But it wasn't long before the eyes of everyone had gone from them as a spectacle and back to their own partners; leaving Inuyasha and Kagome a little freer even in the crowd.

She immediately melted against him and knew that this was where she wanted to be for the rest of her life. They were a perfect fit and she was aware as always now, of the sensations of their bodies in such close proximity. She looked into his face as she heard his low amused chuckle; he knew only too well what was happening to her, he though had more experience of control and was not obviously physically moved. By now however, Kagome was not embarrassed, she was only too well aware of Inu senses and she gave him a grin in return.

"You didn't come and join the queue Kagome; I'm hurt."

"I didn't want you forced to dance with me, I'm not one of your adoring fan club."

"You aren't? I'm wounded to the heart."

"Of course you are; you'll just have to console yourself with your pretty blonde."

"I'll introduce you if you like; her name is Sally."

"Should I be concerned about her?"

"Not at all, she is perfectly healthy." He sniggered and the reply earned him a nasty pinch on the arm. But all too soon the music changed and that dance was over. Inuyasha returned Kagome to Houjou and went back over to Sally for the next slow dance. Kagome couldn't help but feel a tiny flare of jealousy when she saw them dancing together, the girl leaning her head on Inuyasha's chest while her arms encircled him. And what was worse was that he was holding her just as tightly.

Eventually of course the evening began to wind down and people started to leave when their parents or hire cars collected them. Not that that was as simple as it sounded, the reality that this prom was the end of school made many of the girls tearful when it came to say their goodbyes. Some of the boys too were suspiciously bright eyed and this was where the teachers also came in handy as they helped their now ex- students calm down enough to leave.

Inuyasha grinned sympathetically at the tearstained Kagome as she too had been busy saying goodbye to friends. But eventually Houjou and she left too and their car whisked them away to their homes. That night Kagome dreamed of the dance again, but this time she danced exclusively with Inuyasha and it was his flowers she wore pinned to her dress and there was no such person as Sally.

TBC


	20. Preparation and Leaving Home

Chapter 20 Preparation and Leaving Home

Kagome had a lie in the morning after the prom; she had gone to bed late as she was one of the last to leave the dance and then Houjou had accepted the offer of coffee and had chatted with Mama and Kyouko about the evening. Then when he finally went, Kagome was free to finish the story and filled in the gaps about Inuyasha which she knew they would understand. Kyouko wouldn't tell her about Sally however; he said that was for Inuyasha to explain.

When she finally got up, it was to a late breakfast and a curious sense of uncertainty; formal schooling was behind her and yet until she knew the results of her exams, her future education was in the balance. She went out to help her grandfather with some of the shrine duties which had tended to get neglected while she had been at school and with her extra tutoring.

While she was out in the courtyard sweeping, she was interrupted by an attractive giggle and there was Sally, her long wavy blonde hair pulled into a high ponytail that reminded Kagome heart wrenchingly of Sango. The girl was very pretty with her sapphire blue eyes sparking in amusement, her hair still long enough to bounce down her back even though tied up. The night before, she had looked older and more sophisticated with the hair in a neat chignon and wearing a red sheath dress.

Today though she wore a light and very short summer dress and looked hardly any older than Kagome herself. Before Kagome could properly introduce herself, Inuyasha had also arrived and slipped his arm around both girls' waists. He chuckled as he introduced Kagome to Sally and said that they had been invited to spend the afternoon and share the evening meal at the shrine by Mama and Kyouko.

Kagome walked arm in arm with Inuyasha and Sally into the house where Mama was waiting to welcome them all with a cup of tea. While they drank their tea, Kagome mentioned that she was surprised to have seen Inuyasha at the prom so early in the evening; she had understood he wouldn't turn up until the last hour. Sally said that it was her fault; she hadn't liked to see Inuyasha moping, so had encouraged him to go and take her.

Neither missed the look of anger that fleetingly crossed Kagome's face as she asked why he hadn't wanted to go. Inuyasha said he hadn't liked the idea of being fair game for all of his students, who had been telling him for weeks that they would look out for him at the prom and Sally said he should go and she would be his date letting the girls know he was taken already.

The earlier they got there proved to be better and they had convinced the pupils that Mr Shiroinu had a girl; it took the pressure off him having to dance with any girl more than once. Kagome sulked slightly knowing that that had included her and even though she understood why, it still rankled. So she merely mentioned that they had really looked like a couple whenever she had seen them dance, her tone snide as she glanced towards the hanyou.

He though just grinned sheepishly, as he turned to Sally who reached for her finger and turned her ring, revealing herself as Shami to Kagome's astonished eyes. She looked totally different as Sally and even acted differently, dressing far more freely than the dark haired and more responsible tutor that Kagome knew. After filling Kagome in on the fact that full youkai could choose two disguises as they were tied to the inherited youki, Kagome laughed as she realised she had been wound up; although they had not intended her to suffer her ignorance for long.

Inuyasha went to play outside with Souta letting the girls talk and Shami explain. Kyouko went out with them and took the pair for an ice-cream; purely because he fancied one and needed the excuse. Kagome meantime helped her mother make some tea and laid out some small cakes as their afternoon treat.

"Why didn't you go with him as Shami though?" Kagome asked.

"Too many people know I am Inuyasha's sister Kagome; he needed a date, not just an escort or the girls would have been all over him."

"I had no idea it was you, the way you were dancing I thought…"

"Silly girl, there is no one but you for Inuyasha; I was holding him tightly so that he wouldn't come over to you and rip off that flower you wore. You couldn't hear his low growls of frustration at all those boys all evening. If I hadn't kept a firm grip, you would have had him sniffing at you and rubbing his nose all over your face and neck as he reasserted his scent marks on your pulse points."

At this point Mama spoke; she had noticed her daughter's growing look of incredulous alarm.

"Kagome, I think Shami exaggerates a little; she is teasing you about her brother." Mama looked sternly at Shami who grinned wryly;

"Perhaps; just a little, Aunt Amai. He did want to come to you though Kagome and I promised Sesshpapa that I would keep my eye on him. So sometimes just keeping his mind on me more did the trick. Inuyasha is quite able to keep his instincts at bay now." She laughed, smirking and Kagome thought she was remembering something past.

But she had got the picture properly by now and was getting used to the sibling teasing that abounded in the Shiroinu household, even by her tutors who could be serious when they needed to be. Privately though it sounded as though Sesshoumaru's children were too like him sometimes when it came to teasing Inuyasha; it seemed that Mama though had seen this too, and was on top of the situation.

Soon they were talking about what Kagome hoped to study at University and they worked out that it would benefit her to keep up her private studies to consolidate her learning, even if she had passed her exams. The summer would fly by and would be a busy time with the extra lessons still, besides the essential job of getting her kit ready for University. They were still talking about it when the boys came back and then into the evening meal.

Kagome didn't notice that Inuyasha was quieter than normal while they spoke of the University she hoped to attend; or the fact that she would be leaving home for the first time, although her excursions into the feudal era had prepared her a little for this. Kagome wasn't sure what she wished for after Uni, but she was hoping to major in History and Geography and she would be rooming in the dormitories on campus, at least for the first year and coming home every other weekend.

She was excited at the thought and her eyes were bright as they discussed all she would need. Nobody but Mama noticed that Inuyasha didn't eat as well as he normally did at dinner. But there was nothing to be done by drawing attention to him now, Mama knew that all this talk about Kagome leaving home was causing him pain. She would speak to Kyouko later on and looked to him now and realised that he too had noticed his nephew's loss of appetite.

The evening finished and Inuyasha and Shami left to go home, Kagome went to bed full of what she was going to be doing and Mama and Kyouko were left to talk. Kyouko explained that they had known it would be hardest this time for Inuyasha to accept; but it had to be as Kagome desired to go to University.

For the girl things had settled into a normal life at long last. She was eighteen, had finished school and was probably off to University and had a boyfriend whom she loved deeply but was not yet ready to settle down. The uncertainties of life in the feudal era were passed and the intensity of her feelings to have an almost obsessive and exclusive relationship with Inuyasha had eased; now the danger of losing him almost constantly was past, and she was secure in his love.

The summer was busy; for the first two weeks, Kagome mainly kept company with her friends from school who would all be going in different directions so along with promises to keep in touch, they cemented their friendships by being together, shopping, cinema and chatting. Kagome got the results she had worked so hard for and at her graduation both her families were present.

Mr Shiroinu, director of Education was the guest of honour and he was pleased to be able to offer his personal congratulations to the graduates. Recognising that some had overcome great odds to be able to be there at this momentous stage in their young careers, he commended them all and had a special smile just for Kagome as he handed her the diploma. Of course there was a special celebratory meal at one of the finest restaurants afterwards.

Inuyasha was his normal ebullient self at the meal, he was not going to do or say anything to tarnish Kagome's achievement or her excitement that she could now go to the university of her choice. It was the last time that they could see one another as just themselves, as they danced that evening; Inuyasha had much to do over the summer holidays in preparation for the next term at school and Kagome was studying and sorting the stuff she would need for her room on campus.

Often now when Kagome went to the Manor where she would spend time with her Mama or Shami, she wouldn't see Inuyasha at all until the evening meal and sometimes not even then. In addition to school preparation, Inuyasha was still a younger lord of the Western Lands and had work to do that helped out Sesshoumaru. The Daiyoukai had delegated specific areas for his sons to work in as they learned about the positions they held.

Inuyasha was not Sesshoumaru's heir; that legal side of his life still recognised that he was the brother of the Western Lord and not his son, and therefore Kenshiki was the next in line. But when it came to responsibility, Sesshoumaru made sure that Inuyasha was not left out; he didn't want the boy feeling on the edge of the family and besides, the West was also Inuyasha's birthright.

Their father had left his younger son a smaller estate which he'd developed with Izayoi's dowry. This was now a substantial holding that Inuyasha would gain on his majority, which was still a few years away according to youkai growth. So now he was learning how to run his estate and how it interacted with the rest of Sesshoumaru's property.

At the moment he was keeping all of this a secret from Kagome; he wanted to surprise her when she became his mate and he could offer her his estate as her home. All she knew was that he was helping and learning how to run the Western Lands. So during that long hot summer, apart from a couple of family picnics, the couple mainly only got glimpses of one another, and were often like ships that passed in the night.

Sesshoumaru kept an eye on his young brother; he knew the pup was hurting inside because soon Kagome would be gone for weeks at a time and he was concerned that they were seeing so little of each other, even if it was for the best. Inuyasha's youkai was well trained but instincts still would surface when least expected and so, he was watched carefully. But Inuyasha didn't succumb to his youkai; instead he threw himself into his work, and took the time off every now and then to join in with everyone and made his brother proud of him.

The time they did spend together however was wonderful and Inuyasha let Kagome tell him all about the things she wanted to do at University, and he in turn shared some of his own experiences with her. He explained some of the pitfalls and some of the routines, without telling her everything that would take away the whole new experience for her.

Finally the day arrived and Inuyasha had volunteered to take Kagome and get her settled in; Mama still had Souta to see to at his own school and besides it was the last time for the young couple to be together for a while. There had been a 'launching into the next stage' dinner for Kagome where she said her goodbyes for now to the Shiroinu Family, who all had little presents for her to take with her. A new fountain pen, a box with pretty paper and envelopes plus a few books of stamps; a large memory card for her camera, and a matching stick for her computer, a top up card for her phone with a generous amount of credit, several new programmes for her laptop that she might like but that weren't essential and various other sundries that would make life easier for her.

Kagome thanked them all and received her hugs and kisses from all of them including Sesshoumaru who reiterated that he was proud of her; she had taken full advantage of the opportunities she had been given and proved herself. There were tears rather naturally from Kagome but as Shami said there was no need for them, they would all see one another soon enough and Kagome should rather just be excited for the next day. She snuffled a little, embarrassed as she was the only one who had damp eyes, but smiled soon enough as she recognised the truth of the words.

Bright and early, Inuyasha drove up in one of the family's estate cars and loaded up the boot with Kagome's luggage and belongings while she hugged her mother tightly. Once again, she was told how proud everyone was that she had done well in her school work considering the trials she had faced; but most of all, Mama was proud of the way she had turned out. Kagome was a well adjusted and kind girl who was considerate of everyone, but stood firm to her principles. With a last hug and kiss from Souta and Grandpa, Kagome got into the car and they drove off.

It was a new experience for Kagome to be in the car with Inuyasha driving and she had a sudden image of the hanyou as he had been before his new life, in the same position. He would have been all over the place; anywhere he could see a gap and regardless of the rules of the road, plus he would have invented new ways to show road rage.

The old Inuyasha would not look as cool as the new, with his neat braid and leather jacket over the smart Levis. Inuyasha now had marvellous self control and wouldn't let others on the road faze him, he told Kagome that he already knew that everyone else was a jackass; he didn't need to yell at them to prove it to him. Inuyasha was a good driver; he didn't rely on his superlative instincts to drive fast and dangerously, but he did seem to see openings and react to them faster than anyone else could.

They made very good time and had breakfast in a small but neat café where the food was plentiful and well cooked, even if the variety was limited. Their conversation was easy flowing and if Kagome started to get maudlin, Inuyasha was able to buck her up and make her smile. He kept telling her that she would find that the time would fly by and she would be back with them all in no time at all, but that she should enjoy her university experience.

When they pulled in to the car park on the university grounds, Kagome suddenly felt very small and naïve; it reminded her of the times when she had gone from being among the biggest children in junior school to one of the smallest as she started secondary. She was very grateful for the reassuring and knowing grin on Inuyasha's face as he pulled her into a hug and then helped her to find her rooms.

Having him there with his cheery _'hiya' _to her two new room mates was amazing; none of the girls knew one another but he was soon chatting away to them all, asking questions and the ice was broken before it could form. Not being Kagome's mum or dad was the obvious bonus in this, he was obviously Kagome's boyfriend and didn't make any of them feel childish. Soon the introductions were all done and once the girls had all settled into their respective areas of the room, he announced he would take them all to dinner that evening.

By the time Inuyasha was ready to leave that night, Kagome had made firm advances with the other two girls in friendship and the three were set to remain so for the remainder of their stay. But before he left her, Inuyasha took Kagome aside and gave her a gift of his own. A dainty friendship ring that was made from his claw and some of Tessaiga's diamonds picking out an ornate I and K entwined, its strength was unbreakable no matter how fragile it looked.

She could feel the youki and knew it had protective power for her in some way. Inuyasha said that if she channelled her Miko power through the ring, he would be aware of a drain on his youki and he would come to her. Obviously this was only if she was in trouble, the closer he got to the ring the stronger the pull on his youki.

Kagome threw her arms around him, thanking him and not wanting to let him go; but it was time and he gently unclasped her and giving her a last kiss. Then, telling her not to cry and that she was a 'silly wench'; he left her in the care of her new friends and swiftly departed. There was quite a long return journey still ahead of him.

TBC


	21. Apart

Chapter 21 Apart

Inuyasha drove back slowly to the Manor after stopping to eat on the way; he felt empty inside, leaving Kagome alone and away from her family or him went against all his instincts. Ever since he had known her she had been his responsibility or her mother's, now she was on her own and his gut ached for her. He remembered his own first night away from home at university and knew that Kagome too would hardly be able to sleep knowing that all her loved ones were far away.

All the girls would feel lost that night and would be thinking of family in a loving way, even if they argued or weren't close. Such had not been the same for him nor would be for Kagome, their families were both tightly knit and she would probably cry herself into a fitful sleep every night for a while, just as he had done. Not that he had ever told anyone that, he thought ruefully; but he remembered how hard it had been leaving all his siblings and parents, especially if he thought he was missing out on family time.

It hadn't mattered either that he'd given himself a severe talking to night after night for the first couple of weeks, commanding himself to think about the lectures or events of the coming days; his mind had always wandered off on it's own accord to think about home. He would remember story time for the small ones and bath times and hair brushing and sitting playing games and singing before the little ones went to bed and then the older ones would talk quietly with their parents and enjoy a drink. Sesshpapa and Hanamama kept an old fashioned family and time together was always important.

All the little stitches of his now happy life would come in glorious colour just when he was wishing for them to fade away and let him sleep; but they would be washed in his tears to make them even more vibrant. It had not taken long of course for his homesickness to ease and it had helped to know that he was not the only sufferer; most boys as well as girls faired much the same at this stage of their lives. Now it was Kagome's turn and his heart clenched again when he knew he could not be there for her.

By the time Inuyasha pulled into the driveway at the Manor he was deflated and to his horror felt tearful and a huge lump had risen in his throat. Therefore he didn't enter the house immediately but walked around the grounds for a bit until he felt more in control. It took longer than he thought before he was able to be certain that his eyes had stopped watering and he no longer needed to use his sleeve because he'd forgotten a hankie.

However the lump was still there and took longer to swallow, but eventually that too had subsided; what Inuyasha did not know was that his eyes were no longer teary but had a deepening red glow to them. Not that this was any longer a problem; Sesshoumaru had trained Inuyasha's youkai this time round before he got into any trouble and so far on the rare occasions Inuyasha transformed it was only partially. He retained some speech and intellectual capacity and could respond intelligently to his alpha.

Sesshoumaru however was aware as always with anything concerning his pups and he had come in search of his brother. Sensing that the youkai was uppermost in his brother, he spoke to him in Inu.

"Inuyasha's bitch safe school?"

"Yes. Safe bed, others good."

"Why Youkai Inuyasha?"

"Youkai stronger than hanyou."

"Inuyasha need fight?"

"No not fight, hanyou start cry, Inuyasha not want that. Let youkai stop it." The youkai was brutally honest in his answers, more so than the evasions Inuyasha could give as a hanyou. But Sesshoumaru was not surprised that his brother was upset now that Kagome had gone, it was expected; the pup had not voiced any objection to her going away at all. He raised his eyebrow at the youkai though, because he was not being as effective as Inuyasha wished.

Sesshoumaru enjoyed speaking with Inuyasha as a youkai; the pup was far more open and he looked like a much younger version of their father. Inuyasha could never hide anything from Sesshoumaru; the Daiyoukai knew the whelp far too well, from his first life down till now and he wiped the few stray tears from the young youkai's cheeks with his fingers. Then he spoke kindly to his little brother;

"Not wrong Inuyasha weep, sad young bitch gone."

"She back soon. Youkai not cry, shame."

"No shame Inuyasha. Youkai can weep; Inuyasha knows this."

"Not for silly reason. Always silly reason with hanyou. Hanyou understand her gone, youkai not understand why." Inuyasha did not look at Sesshoumaru but somewhere in the distance, remembering; then he continued.

"Youkai wanted mate bitch long ago; stop leaving through well, stop Inuyasha sad. Youkai not understand mate leaving, hanyou understand, but youkai provide for mate. Hanyou say mate sad if not leave, need see family. Mate is hanyou's family, no one else; hanyou lonely when mate gone always. Fears mate not come back to weak hanyou. Inuyasha no one many many years alone, not like. Mate leave make him cry sometimes; youkai want out more but hanyou hold Tessaiga. Better now youkai trained, but still mate leaves weak hanyou. Still Inuyasha sad, youkai not understand always."

Sesshoumaru bent his head and put his fangs to Inuyasha's throat and the youkai let his head fall to the side to allow his brother better access. The older brother growled softly, pleased with the unforced submission from Inuyasha; he had been concerned for a while that Inuyasha's youkai might be getting lost in the old time where he resented his brother. But it was not so, Sesshoumaru raised his head and nuzzled his pup's hair and ears comfortingly. He spoke normally;

"Inuyasha, you are not youkai; at the moment you are my youkai pup but sometimes you are my human child, and most of the time you are both. I am remiss in only calling you pup, you are as much a child as a pup and your heart is almost completely human. Your mother was a kind and loving woman and she passed these traits on to you. Father gave you his power and strength but he too was passionate and loving to his family, all of us. It is only natural that you are sad that Kagome has gone for awhile, but you and your youkai do know she is coming back."

There was the barest shimmer of tears in the ruby eyes that stared at his alpha, but the youkai Inuyasha nodded.

"Part of me understands. It is always this way. Part hurts, part does not understand. Better now you help Inuyasha. Before Inuyasha want to die with me often, sometime he want to kill me, sometimes kill human me. Not now; now you help hanyou, not mind me talking, protect human."

"Inuyasha, I love you and the bad days are gone forever. I know you feel insecure because you instinctively want Kagome near to you, but she is safe; she has the ring you gave her does she not?" His words had the desired effect; Inuyasha's eyes turned amber almost instantly and filled with tears this time, over spilling onto his cheeks.

"How did you know about the ring? I didn't say because I didn't want anyone thinking it was more than just for being a friend and to let me know if she was in trouble."

"It is my duty to know of anything where the youki of my family is concerned Inuyasha. It is a strong power and by rights you should have asked me first; as it happens, Totousai informed me knowing the rules of our house. I approved it in any case so don't feel bad, just let me know in future." Sesshoumaru put his arm round Inuyasha's shoulders and started to lead him to the house. "Come child, Hanamama is waiting for you inside."

She was, her arms went round him and she held him to her before letting him go so he could grab a cup of coffee. She asked if Kagome was O.K. and Inuyasha mentioned how she had two roommates and that he'd taken them all out to dinner. Both of his parents thought that had been a good idea to get them all to become friends.

"Now you know how we felt when we let each of you go for the first time; it's hard when loved ones start to make their own way, but you can't hold on forever." Hanamama said. "Was Kagome alright when you left?"

"Feh! She was crying but I left her with her new friends. She'll get over it; she was going to ring home."

"Tears are to be expected for a few nights; I remember you when you went away."

"Just me, what about the others?"

"Everyone copes in their own way pup, the first litter always got angry and ripped things up until they settled down. Individually of course."

"Anyway how do you know how I was; it was only me there?"

"Inuyasha, do you think I don't know how my pups will be; you are a home bird and you were away, just like Kagome. Besides which, we could tell by your voice when you phoned at night to say goodnight to the small ones and when we brought you home the first time, the salty scent of your pillow gave you away."

Inuyasha 'humph'ed loudly and changed the subject. Sesshoumaru had already turned away from him so that Inuyasha wouldn't see the amused smile he had shared with Hanataba, in that annoying way parents often had when speaking with their children. It pleased them both that Inuyasha was still young enough and not yet fully out of their influence as parents, Sesshoumaru especially still enjoyed to tease him.

Finally Inuyasha said goodnight and went to bed; but not before looking in on the babies first. He loved all of his little siblings dearly and the new babies were so tiny and perfect. Perhaps one day he would have some of his own and he wondered what it would be like to hold pups that he had sired with the woman he adored. Kagome was still young and who knows what she would do when she earned her degree, would she even want to settle down with pups or would she prefer a career?

Inuyasha had not spoken to her yet about her hopes and desires after she finished university; that was one thing Sesshoumaru had stipulated to him before the young pair re-united, he was not to put Kagome under any form of pressure. Only she would be able to make her decisions concerning her soul's desire, nobody else. But it was so hard on Inuyasha, he didn't know whether he would ever have her or pups, she could still meet someone else and he would have to let her go; that had been non negotiable from the start.

"You should be in bed Inuyasha, not fretting and losing yourself to wishful thinking. Come along, you will wake the small ones."

"Will I lose her Sesshpapa; I mean after she finishes her degree? It's a big shiny world where she could do a lot of things that don't include me. S'pose we grow apart and she don't want to come back to an old fashioned lifestyle?" Inuyasha swiped his sleeve across his traitorous eyes.

"You _are_ tired Little One, you forget you are talking about Kagome who is loyal and brave, who has faced more things than any other girl of her age and who is devoted to you. She has been raised with similar values to yourself and loves you with all her heart; even before you deserved her love, she gave it to you. If she was going to leave it would have been when your lives were running smoothly with nothing to fight against, but any fool can see you are even closer now. You must be patient Inuyasha."

Sesshoumaru took Inuyasha to bed and sat with his pup/child as he had done many times before, stoking the hair and puppy ears until the sniffles had died away and the boy was asleep. The Daiyoukai knew it was difficult to fight Inu instincts however old you were and Inuyasha was finding it hard. So far his human instincts were dominating, causing the tears which in the circumstances were better than the possessiveness of his youkai. But he must be watched, Inuyasha's youkai had surfaced already and despite Sesshoumaru's reassurances to the pup, nothing was guaranteed.

In the morning Inuyasha was ready for his new history lessons with new and old students; buoyed up by a text message on his mobile phone that wished him luck and lots of love from Kagome. He immediately replied with the same and felt better than he had done since he got home the evening before. Then for the rest of the week, there was a phone call every evening from Inuyasha to Kagome and text messages throughout the day from Kagome to Inuyasha. It had only been arranged for the first week, to help her to settle in but soon became routine, not that they could say much on the phone but it was the only real contact until two weeks later she returned home for her first weekend.

Mama had arranged to pick Kagome up for the weekend, she wanted to see for herself how Kagome was and how she had settled in; she met the other girls and their parents and was able to put her mind at rest. Kagome was excited to be home, she had so much to tell and it was a happy homecoming for her, in a way it was even more special as Kyouko had to work late and it was like old times with just the four of them. But she found she missed her new family, her stepfather was so much a part of their lives now and she was glad when he too came home.

On Saturday, Inuyasha came to take her out and she positively flew into his arms and he held her tight never wanting to let her go again. He growled against her neck and made her shudder deliciously especially when she felt his fangs graze her, but the faint scent of her blood brought Inuyasha back to his senses and he let her go. Her eyes were shining as she stared in love right at him and Inuyasha knew that she would let him mark her right there and then as his promised mate; but he wouldn't, he had promised.

They went out for the day together and alone but always in public; Kagome was full of news about the courses she was taking, the friends she had made and some of the clubs and societies she was interested in. She had taken his advice to keep herself busy, it would alleviate some of the homesickness and also keep her out of trouble, while widening out her social circle.

Inuyasha wanted to know about any parties that she might go to, there had been none yet but that would change. He took her to the beach and to the cinema and then on to dinner; never once allowing her to realise that the more she enjoyed university life, the less secure and happy he became. His youkai warred within him, not understanding her need to stand on her own two feet when he was there, wanting her and willing and able to provide.

Sesshoumaru had confidence in him though which was a boost for Inuyasha and his brother had promised that as time went by, his youkai would settle down. At the moment it was apprehensive and troubled but nonetheless obedient and Sesshoumaru was prepared to settle him as and when needed, which gave Inuyasha peace of mind. Sesshoumaru of course was right, Inuyasha's youkai did recede after realising there was pattern to his mate's returns.

It was different to the time before when she left through the well, usually more consistent and Inuyasha in general was older and calmer as a hanyou which served to subdue his youkai too. Fairly soon the pattern was set that Mama would collect Kagome from the university and Inuyasha would take her back. He would then take her and her roommates out for dinner before saying goodbye and leaving for home.

When he arrived back, Sesshoumaru would always be waiting to assess how he was coping. Although the Daiyoukai didn't make an issue out of it, Inuyasha knew that he was being checked up on. Sesshoumaru was emphatically insistent that Inuyasha have control over his youkai and woe betide him if he failed in his training because of negligence. In this area of his life, there was no let up and Sesshoumaru had been harsh with him a couple of times when Inuyasha had decided he didn't need anymore.

Tessaiga was always at hand for the hanyou, it resided above the boy's bed and everyone knew where it was if needed. Not that it had been used for control in centuries and now all that Inuyasha used it for was exercise; although just holding on to it once or twice a day, helped his youkai remain in check. Sesshoumaru alone knew how strong Inuyasha's youkai was and how dangerous it still could be, which is why he reinforced his commands on training. Their father's blood was very strong and could still devastate Inuyasha if he ever lost control.

But Inuyasha was well trained and took things seriously, including the embarrassment every time his brother would ask him to release his youkai so that Sesshoumaru could speak with him. Inuyasha knew that he was much more honest in this aspect and sometimes felt like a little boy having to account for some mischief.

Sesshoumaru was well aware of his brother's thoughts and concerns about the lack of privacy his youkai could involve and never abused his position. He had no need to, he could read the pup like a book and Inuyasha never had been able to hide his misdemeanours from him. In contrast he respected Inuyasha's youkai greatly, the boy had worked hard to get it so stable that it would recognise the authority of the alpha and was intelligent in speech. But it was still a young intelligence and inexperienced, needing the assurances of his brother's far stronger youkai, keeping it safe by not letting it run wild.

It seemed no time at all to Kagome that she was coming home for the winter break and this time both Mama and Kyouko picked her up, taking her for a meal before they arrived home. She was happy and contented, so far able to keep up with the work which she found enjoyable. As a sensible girl still finding her feet, she did not indulge in too many extra curricular activities and was diligent in making sure she understood her subject.

And over dinner, Mama told her that she wasn't going to have to wait for grandchildren to have a puppy eared child about the house.

TBC


	22. Hanyous and a Dark Secret

Chapter 22 Hanyous and a Dark Secret

A/N Hi, the valid point was raised about Inuyasha not speaking properly in the last chapter. I did not mean to infer that he couldn't speak as a proper human though, he was meant to be speaking in Inu with his brother and not with human speech. Hope that clears it up.

_WARNING __some_ swearing and non graphic mention of violent abuse. This is not meant to take lightly any who have suffered such abuse, or accurately portray how people react in such circumstances.

_Story_

Kagome stared at her mother and then Kyouko as the news sank in; then she squealed loudly and got up from her seat to hug them both.

"How far gone are you Mama, and do you know what you are having?"

"I've only been expecting for a couple of weeks Kagome; but yes, Kyouko is certain we have a boy and girl just like his sister's last litter."

"Does everyone else know?"

"Only our family, Kyouko says the scent change is only now definite, so we haven't been anywhere yet until we told you." Mama noticed the pleased look on Kagome's face and soon they finished with their coffee and were on their way home. The evening at home was great but Kagome couldn't wait to see Inuyasha again and so the next day they all went to the Manor.

As soon as they went in, Kyouko went to Sesshoumaru to speak; there was no need to tell the Daiyoukai however, he had already noted the change of scent as soon as Mama walked in. All the other Inu youkai too had immediately realised what the change meant, but would not be so rude as to comment in case Mama did not yet know herself. They would wait until the announcement was made; all that is except Inuyasha, who just stared at her with a huge grin on his face which would have told her instantly if she didn't already know.

He came over to her and took both of her hands in his and kissed her cheeks. She rubbed his ears gently and whispered that she would not let his go even when she had the ears of her own pups to play with. Later that evening when the congratulations of everyone had died down, Inuyasha came and laid his head on her stomach and softly growled at the pups that were much too young to know what he was doing. But it was instinct to make them feel that they belonged and for Inuyasha that was important.

During the whole of Mama's pregnancy Inuyasha always did the same thing when he saw her and Mama always reassured him that she would never stop loving him like her own son. She knew that he needed to know this far more than Kagome or even Souta, who to a large extent took her love for granted, completely secure. It was not so for the hanyou who remembered the loveless times and when it was Mama alone who truly understood him.

Even now when he was in different circumstances, when the love of his brother and sister-in-law was unconditional for him, Inuyasha never just assumed he was loved and always required the assurance. So Mama petted his ears and whispered softly to him while he spoke to her pups, loving all three of her hanyous at the same time.

After a healthy pregnancy where Mama was assiduously monitored by everybody that she knew, the pups were born the following September, delaying the start of Kagome's new scholastic year. First was the boy Hoshii, followed twenty minutes later by the girl who they called Kietsu. The first visitors once Mama was sufficiently recovered were her other children and Inuyasha, followed later by the new Uncle and Aunt.

Inuyasha stayed back to let Kagome and Souta go first to hug their mother and admire and handle the twins but Mama called him forward too. She remembered the times when he had felt left out before; besides she had not idly said she considered him her son. When it was his turn to see the babies he marvelled and rejoiced that hanyous were mainly accepted now.

There were still not so many of them but they were no longer looked down upon. These two would never know the stigma or fear that had plagued Inuyasha's early life and he knew that they would be completely loved and cared for, just as children should be. Inuyasha brought each pup close to his face to imprint their looks and scent, nuzzling them in wonder.

Sesshoumaru and Hanataba too were delighted, she teased her brother saying that she thought she would never see the day that he would have his own pups, confirmed bachelor that he was. She was holding the boy pup; he had the silver, rainbow highlighted hair of his Sire with the same colour for his puppy ears. His sister was smaller, her ears bigger and her hair white; she was identical in every way in looks to Inuyasha when he was newly whelped, and Sesshoumaru was lost in memories.

Being a father himself now, he genuinely couldn't understand what had possessed him all those years ago to be so cruel to Izayoi and Inuyasha. The thought of the suffering both had endured that he could have prevented could still make him feel distraught inside, especially when he was presented with a visual like this new pup. Sesshoumaru handed Kietsu back to her mother and Mama put her hand on his cheek as he leaned forward. She could read the thoughts going through his head as he held his little niece.

"Leave the past now Sesshoumaru; he is fine and well, there is no reason to beat yourself anymore." She then put her hand out to Inuyasha and when he came over to her she petted him too and put the girl in his arms. "She really is like you Inuyasha; I don't know where her pure white hair comes from though."

"Kyouko, Hanataba, Inuyasha and I share a common Great Great Grandsire; the solely white hair comes from him." Sesshoumaru explained and Mama nodded satisfied. Then after admiring the pups some more it was time to leave and allow Mama to rest with her new arrivals. She and Kyouko were so happy; he was still in a form of shock that these new pups were his offspring, but they were already responding to his voice, turning their golden eyes to see him and their perky ears to hear his voice as he sang of his happiness deep and low in a timeless lullaby.

Soon they were all home; Mama may have been an older mother in human terms but the youkai mating mark had already rejuvenated her, tying her life in with Kyouko's and her recovery was much faster than could have been expected normally. Kagome had had to return to university now even though she had wished to be able to stay and the parting had been hard on both hers and Inuyasha's sides.

His instincts were telling him that the girl should be home in the safety of her family, even more so now there were new pups; but of course reason told him this was not the case. Inuyasha just knew that he hated her being away and the new pups were making him broody. He visited every day after school finished to see his tiny relations, as yet he wasn't sure who they were to him, but did it matter really? Should he consider them his cousins, niece and nephew or just potential in-laws?

Well, niece and nephew were out he decided; technically he was only the brother of their uncle who was mated to their actual aunt, so that meant that Inuyasha wasn't anywhere on that line. But it made him sad too that once again he felt apart, as if his place was undefined anywhere; then he shook hi s head telling himself not to be so stupid, he belonged, he just didn't need any title, he was Inuyasha as always.

As the pups grew they took more notice of the things around as all children do and they were familiar visitors with the Manor family whom they knew by voice already. It did not take long for them to be familiar by sight too as they got to know their tiny cousins and all four babies were the centre of attention. Inuyasha was fascinated; he never said anything but he was often choked when he saw the small hanyous playing with the youkai babies.

To be sure he had seen that Rin and Shippou's hanyou kits were accepted for what they were and had never questioned it, but Mama's pups were Inu hanyou like him and looked like him. It brought it home to him that their Mama would never have cause to shed the tears for them that his real Mama had done for him.

So he usually watched them play with mixed emotions, no longer sad for himself but for the lost opportunity his own mother had had with her only child. Of course even though he didn't realise it, his moods and actions were noticed and understood by his elders; but they respected his need for privacy that came with that understanding.

Shippou and Rin too enjoyed seeing more hanyou offspring, Rin's new kit was a couple of months old now and often joined in with the others; it became a regular melee sometimes as hanyou were quick to develop, much faster than human children. Shippou though was sometimes annoying still, and was not above teasing Inuyasha; however this was and always had been a part of their relationship.

Normally there was no problem, Sesshoumaru had gently curbed Shippou's desire for youthful revenge on the small hanyou, but the small fox was not malicious and would not torment a younger child in any case. Besides even though they had often acted like they couldn't stand one another, it was not true; Inuyasha had taken good care of the kit protecting and training him when no one else was watching and Shippou had looked up to Inuyasha with respect and even love.

Now they were like brothers of sorts and close, Shippou however was mischievous by nature even as an adult and Inuyasha was just too easy to wind up. The kitsune found it very amusing that Shami, Ikkyou and now the new pup Kietsu were so like Inuyasha to look at and they were all girls. It was too good an opportunity for Shippou to miss.

So he made the best of it, whenever he could. Inuyasha at first smiled at the jokes and then sighed in exasperation, finally doing his best to ignore Shippou. But the kitsune wouldn't give up, even when the banter had grown stale for everybody else. It was not bothering the girls and Inuyasha seemed not to care so Sesshoumaru allowed it to carry on, eventually it would pall for Shippou as well. Unfortunately the kitsune found a new audience in Kouga when the wolves came to visit.

Kouga made the obvious but innocent comment about how alike the girls all were to Inuyasha and this was the start of Shippou's fun. But he and Kouga tended to get carried away as they laughed and joked; Inuyasha tried to ignore it as he dozed beneath the cherry trees.

"Perhaps Inuyasha is a girl in disguise" Shippou muted to Kouga; "I thought he was too pretty to be a boy when I first met him."

"Nah, if he had of been p'raps I'dve asked him to be my woman instead of Kagome."

"You always called him Muttface or worse Kouga, besides he couldn't see shards. He wouldn't have been your type."

"Maybe, but he was a pretty little fella when he came here." Kouga chuckled reminiscing. The image was too much for Shippou to ignore and he morphed into an Inuyasha copy, making his audience laugh; especially when he slightly softened the hanyou's features and made him curvy in all the wrong places for a male figure.

"Wow Shippou, I think I would have asked him if he looked like that." Kouga grinned and Shippou immediately shrank and made 'Inuyasha' look more naturally like Shami, keeping the softer face. This actually made it hard to see what was different exactly between the two, but Shippou then started to clown around; mincing his walk, being coy with his smile and batting his eyelashes. He then lowered his head and looked at Kouga through his hair and smiled that seductive smile again.

"Come on Kouga, I'll be nice to you, don't you want some fun? I know how to please the boys." 'Inuyasha' said in a husky voice that did indeed sound like the original in some way."Come on, any takers; I'm not fussy." Shippou had got carried away and his audience was not finding him so amusing, but this did not stop him from his flirting; however being bowled over and then flung hard against a tree did.

"You are not funny, bastard kitsune." Said the red-eyed youkai loudly, not caring who heard him and he picked up Shippou again to hurl at another tree. Inuyasha had snapped and transformed and Shippou was lucky that he had been trained this time round and was more in control. "Had I been female years ago I would have been dead, and then what would have happened to your sorry bastard life?" Shippou hit another tree unaware that rescue was at hand.

Kouga had sprung up and made a grab for Inuyasha but was not quite fast enough although he caused a distraction and the transformed hanyou turned on him with a leering smile that sent a chill down the wolf's spine.

"So you'd have liked a piece of my tail too eh Wolf? Well too bad, I weren't there long enough to meet you." Inuyasha snarled, spitting his words while strangling Shippou. However he dropped the kitsune when a green whip slashed across his back making him arch away from the searing pain. Sesshoumaru struck him five or six times more before Inuyasha turned his red eyes on his brother, the hanyou feeling every one of the strokes as he was not wearing the fire rat; but his expression was one of betrayal.

Inuyasha took a final look at the shocked faces around him and ran off into the forest where he could be heard ripping up trees. Sesshoumaru demanded an explanation after making sure that Shippou was not badly hurt, staring at Kouga as the implication of the things Inuyasha had said sank home. The Daiyoukai did not want to believe the conclusion he was coming to and went to discuss it with Hanataba.

She transformed into her youkai form before Sesshoumaru had finished speaking and was already on her way to find her pup, leaping over the walls in one graceful bound. Kyouko and Mama too came in to hear the end of the discussion; she was quiet for a while and said she knew that Inuyasha had been raped but didn't know the details. Her statement of course required immediate explanation and she said that Kagome had told her.

Inuyasha didn't know that Kagome had found out this secret of his past, but Miroku had seen in the hanyou certain classic symptoms of abuse that he displayed when nearing some of the villages. The monk had spoken to Kagome, voicing his opinions in the hope that Kagome would be more understanding of why Inuyasha didn't wish to visit some of the towns and villages. Miroku hoped that it would avoid overuse of the rosary if Kagome realised that Inuyasha might have valid reasons for his brash rudeness.

They had decided not to speak of their suspicions knowing that Inuyasha would deny them emphatically, the hanyou only had his pride and honour to his name; but Miroku was well learned in people and had come across too many abused children in his time not to be accurate in his assessment. He couldn't tell how old Inuyasha would have been when it happened or how often, only that sometimes it still affected him.

Sesshoumaru was shocked and appalled, his instincts telling him to reach Inuyasha immediately and he followed his mate, letting her lead him to his pup. He found her lying wrapped around Inuyasha; in fact he couldn't see the boy and he approached to speak, only to be barred by a snarling bitch baring her teeth at him.

There was nothing he could do except wait, Hanataba would fight him tooth and claw if he approached while she deemed her pup needed her protection, even against her alpha mate. His own nose told him that Inuyasha was once again hanyou and that the bleeding he had caused with his youki whip had stopped, leaving old blood on his little brother's haori.

He sat and waited patiently knowing that Kyouko would look after things in his absence; Hanataba did not growl at him anymore but whined in her throat once or twice in distress for her pup. Sesshoumaru could not offer her comfort either, but he too whined in understanding of her grief. A few hours later, Hanataba stood up and picked Inuyasha up in her jaws and started for the Manor, she took the hanyou into his bedroom and placed him on his futon and changed back as Sesshoumaru entered.

But Hanataba was not finished with Inuyasha yet; she sat down and wanted him to explain what had happened. Inuyasha just stared at her, he didn't want to say, he wanted to forget but he knew he couldn't do that with the way that he had lashed out at Shippou. He felt a fool; he had kept his secret all these years through both lifetimes and now had to lose it just because Shippou finally got to him. The runt didn't know what his play acting had meant to Inuyasha, it hadn't been a deliberate attempt to upset him.

It had been nice hidden by Hanataba; he had calmed down and returned to his hanyou state while she had treated him as a small pup. She had licked him clean and her saliva had helped the wounds from Sesshoumaru's whip. He'd had to remove his clothes or she would have done it for him destroying them in the process; but despite that and the horrific secret he'd revealed, Hanataba did not make him feel vulnerable. She loved him and was caring for him; he had been safe curled behind her.

But he didn't want to tell them what had happened, it was private and he just didn't want to; it made him feel anger which swelled inside him until he felt ready to burst. He blamed himself for a lot of his trouble, had he been stronger… But these were feelings that the youkai didn't understand, his parents needed to know if anything could be done about the situation now and it couldn't. It had happened long ago and been buried in the dust. Only it wasn't any more; it had resurfaced and Inuyasha felt he had acted shamefully.

TBC


	23. Remembering

Chapter 23 Remembering 

_WARNING _Mention of rape but not overly graphic. This is not meant to be an accurate description of the crime of rape or how to deal with it. Such a serious issue cannot be treated in the realms of fanfiction completely accurately and each case is different. I do not mean to offend anybody who has had to deal with such crime.

_Story_

Sesshoumaru and Hanataba were waiting for Inuyasha to speak and tell them what had happened all those years ago. He knew he need not fear them and that they only wanted what was best for him but it was so hard, he'd buried it long ago or so he'd thought. How was he to say when he was wound up so tightly and had been ever since it happened; burying his feelings along with the events of that time?

How could he explain the shame he felt, that he had let it happen; how could he explain to Sesshoumaru that his proud and strong father's youngest son had been so weak that a mere human had caught him unawares? Just thinking about it made his throat tight and thick and his eyes burn but it was far too late to cry over what had happened, besides adding that to the list of weakness.

His parents looked at each other and weren't sure what to do; Inuyasha took pity on them and said he'd tell them later when he'd worked out what to say. That was not a good idea thought Sesshoumaru, he wanted the truth and not a concocted story and he said this to Inuyasha. For a moment, the boy's eyes glowed red with anger, he just wanted to be left alone even though he knew he should say, or who knows when he might blow his top again.

Sesshoumaru watched the emotions crossing Inuyasha's face and saw eventually the anger settled and he thought now was the best time to push, as his brother's mouth always ran away with him when he was enraged.

"Inuyasha, when did this happen? Pup you must tell me." Sesshoumaru had got much better over the years but he still expected to be obeyed and didn't understand how difficult it was for Inuyasha to just 'tell him'.

"Forget it Sesshoumaru, you don't want to know." Inuyasha said growling. Sesshoumaru was alerted by the way Inuyasha used his full name; that was usually reserved for memories of the bad times and was rarely heard now.

"On the contrary Inuyasha, I do wish to know." He remarked gently.

"You didn't at the time; you damned bastard. I was a fool into thinking you might help me but no, you turned away and walked off leaving me to it. I despised you for doing that."

"I never knew Inuyasha, how can you say such a lie. I would not have allowed such a thing had I known." Sesshoumaru was astounded by the expletives and moved toward Inuyasha sharply, but seeing the boy flinch away from him even for a second, gave him pain and he moved back again.

"I'm not lying; Myouga found you and asked you to help me…"

"Myouga; is the flea here now?" Myouga, who was never far away from his young master these days hopped onto Inuyasha's shoulder and looked to Sesshoumaru. He still had a healthy respect for the Youkai but was no longer in mortal dread. "Myouga what do you know of this experience; do you remember the conversation we had about this, surely Inuyasha is mistaken?"

Myouga looked like he was caught between a rock and a hard place, but he couldn't ignore his Lord Sesshoumaru and he agreed that it was time that Inuyasha faced this part of his past. He had lived a long time and had picked up many pearls of wisdom on his travels, and one thing he knew was that Inuyasha needed to let this go if he was to be happy with Kagome. It could remain a black guilty secret otherwise.

"Yes, My Lord; I remember the occasion, although I was not there when my young lord was attacked. Inuyasha was bathing on his human night and therefore not as aware of his surroundings. There were two humans who found him and they thought him a young female at first; they were trying to coax him out of the water by being concerned about a young girl being on her own and they would take her to the village. I didn't trust them, there was something wrong and I came to find you Sire as I knew you were usually near to Inuyasha when he was human."

"Was this when you would have appeared as a twelve or thirteen year old human Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru got a bare nod from his now sullen brother and Myouga carried on, confirming Sesshoumaru's suspicions of when this took place.

"They did indeed think he was a young girl My Lord as I said, and Master Inuyasha was…small in frame for his age besides." In other words the mistake was easily made especially in the dark, Sesshoumaru did remember the time and he looked distressed. Myouga noticed and said;

"To be fair to you My Lord, you honestly thought that they would look after Inuyasha in a human village, you even said it would be better for him and that they would find out their mistake in the morning."

"Feh! I'll bet that's not how he said it, more like it wasn't his concern to get the disgusting whelp out of trouble; or words along those lines."

"Something like that, _as well_ Lord Inuyasha, yes. But that was how it was then in those days." Myouga felt sad he had not known what happened next at the time and felt he had failed Inuyasha badly by not convincing Sesshoumaru to come.

"Inuyasha, please tell us what happened." Hanataba's voice was coaxing and soft making Inuyasha want to fling his arms round her and shut out everything else and just go back to being a little pup again with his Hanamama, after she'd chased the nightmare away. "You'll feel better once you say; my little one." Inuyasha sighed;

"I kept telling them that I wasn't a girl and for them to go away, but they took my clothes and pulled me out of the water. Of course it became obvious that I was male but that made no difference to either of them. I screamed that I was a boy but that didn't matter and they both…they both took turns…like I was a girl. I cried for you Sesshoumaru but you didn't come. I thought they would kill me when they finished, but they had other plans." Inuyasha kept speaking his voice quiet, but firm in the main.

"I was taken to a shack on the edge of the large village; there were a few girls there, all for one purpose. I was the only boy; I was bathed and put in female dress,they put ornaments in my hair and makeup on my eyes and cheeks. I was shackled and my hands held apart by an iron bar then they shoved a gag in my mouth to stop me biting. This was all part of training apparently and I could earn the right to have them removed. They were laughing because I would be a surprise for the customer; not that it mattered, no one turned me away; girl or boy didn't matter to any of them." By now his voice had started to tremble.

"Even when I transformed in the morning it didn't matter, I couldn't free myself of the iron bar, and I was at their mercy. Myouga saved me from being captive, he had led a pack of wild dogs to the shack and they attacked the women running the place. One of the girls got the key to free me and as the girls left, I used my blades of blood on the men as they came back to chase the dogs away. I'll never forget your help Myouga, you were the only one; _he, _the bastard didn't even come and check that I was O.K." Inuyasha swallowed heavily and fired a vitriolic glare at his brother.

"That's why it was good I wasn't a girl in a way because my attack is powered by male hormones according to Myouga, who can tell because of my blood somehow." He stopped reciting and looked down to the floor hiding behind his fringe; he couldn't look at them now they knew his shame. He was a disgrace to the Inu youkai tribe, a weakling runt who couldn't get himself out of a human fix and he suddenly felt despair at the fact he was too filthy for the pure Miko he loved.

Silence filled the room when he stopped as they all tried to contain their anger and waves of shame rolled of Inuyasha and made his brother further worry, why was the pup ashamed? Before he could act or speak however the door slid open and Kagome walked in, straight over to her hanyou and put her arms round him pulling his head to her stomach sheltering him from the rest.

"Kagome…I…"

"I know Inuyasha; I heard you speaking, but I knew before…oh not the details, but that you had been raped I knew. Miroku told me, he…could tell by some of your actions…body language, but we didn't want to upset you by asking though." She held him tight even though he tried to pull away.

"You knew; you and Miroku knew my shame, my filth, my weakness…"

"Yes Inuyasha, but it was never your shame and you are not filth. The ones who did that to a child are the filth; it was never your fault." She spoke softly but Sesshoumaru heard her, how could Inuyasha believe he was to blame, he'd been an immature human caught by two men and Sesshoumaru's blood began to boil. Hanataba put her hand on his arm, it was imperative he cooled down or Inuyasha would think he was angry with him. Sesshoumaru nodded in understanding to his mate.

"I was weak…I couldn't get free…I couldn't stop them from…from…from…"

"Let it go my darling; let it go; it's O.K." Her words were like a charm that released him from the pressure he was holding in and he broke down and wept, heaving great sobs that threatened to take his breath away. He clutched her tightly, his claws digging in at her waist where the sharp points drew blood but she didn't flinch, Inuyasha needed her and while he did so, she would not move.

It had been many years since Sesshoumaru had seen his brother so distraught and yet he knew that this reaction was light in comparison to what it would have been had the Shikon jewel not been used to give Inuyasha his life again. The memories although real were diluted by his new life leaving him to weep over the remembrance, but without the physical pain. Inuyasha's body had been restored to a time before the rape and so had been deeply healed of any lingering problems caused by anyone, Sesshoumaru included.

But the youkai parents were getting more agitated, needing to comfort their pups as now it wasn't just Inuyasha who was in tears; they were running down Kagome's cheeks too but she was silent, right now Inuyasha needed to cry, he didn't need to be concerned or distracted by her at the moment. For more than half an hour, Inuyasha's bitter sobs tortured his brother; the scent of his tears was something he would never forget. Sesshoumaru had not known of the rapes, but he could have prevented the whole thing and his guilt threatened to swamp him.

Hanataba could take it no more and transformed once again, picking up both Kagome and Inuyasha in her mouth and leapt outside and over the wall into the forest so she could wrap herself around the pair of them and this time Sesshoumaru joined her. Together they built a sanctuary around the young couple and Sesshoumaru started a low growling which was almost a purr and using his tail, he nudged both pups into Hanataba's soft furry belly so they could both sleep comfortably.

While the girl and boy slept in their exhaustion, both youkai kept watch, Hanataba pushed Kagome's top up under her arms with her nose so that she could clean the wounds made by Inuyasha's claws. Kagome awoke during this procedure and was amazed at how maternal the soothing laps felt as they healed her sore sides but it wasn't long before she slept again.

Inuyasha had been worn out and when he awoke was not fully aware of where he was, his memories of the evening before were hazy. But he remembered when he saw Kagome lying next to him and snuggling into Hanataba's warm side he wept again, but softer this time and his heart started to heal as he recalled the Miko's tender words and reassurances. Hanataba moved her head down to nuzzle his cheek but did not attempt to stop him from crying out his hurt.

Kagome heard him and snuggled up putting her arm about his waist; Inuyasha turned to her and laid his head on her breast, letting her pet him. Fairly soon he was able to talk to her;

"How are you here Kagome?"

"Kyouko thought you might want me; he flew to me and I rode him back; it's not far when you have youkai speed." She waited but there was no immediate comeback, then he said;

"I'm glad but…you shouldn't be here, you didn't need to know all that. I should have been stronger, it was wrong to react to Shippou, he didn't mean it. I should have kept my temper; no one should have had to know my secret."

"Silly boy, of course I should have been here, you needed me and nothing is more important than that. And you are wrong, it was good you had to deal with that part of your past; or it might have come out in some other way and that might have been harder to face."

"I thought I had dealt with it, I always let some of my anger out when I fought; it seemed natural like when Mama died, I had such anger that I slashed at anything, trees, rocks, youkai that wanted to kill me; I had such power and I know I did the same thing after…"

"Did you cry when your Mama died Inuyasha?"

"Feh! For days and days." He replied so quietly she hardly heard him.

"But not after your escape?"

"No, I was older and besides, I deserved it for being too weak to get myself free." His reply shocked his listeners, but Inuyasha seemed to not have noticed what he'd said. Kagome's temper flared and rightly or wrongly reacted, although she refrained from actually hitting him;

"You idiot how dare you say such stupid things. You didn't deserve any of what happened to you let alone being raped and imprisoned. Nobody _deserves _that; you were a child however many years you'd lived, you were a child Inuyasha, and you were stolen away. Would any of your siblings deserve it, if it had been them unable to escape?" She calmed down because he was weeping once more.

"Inuyasha you're crying still because you didn't at the time. Your youkai got angry but you didn't let your human grieve; let it do so now and you will heal." Kagome's words made sense to him and he rested against her again. Hanataba had listened and contained her growl because Kagome had replied but now she spoke to him;

"You have never been weak Inuyasha; you survived against all the odds and are far stronger mentally and physically than almost any full youkai. Kagome is wise, what happened was far from your fault; it could happen to any abandoned child and still does in some parts of the world. Think about it, why do children need the protection of caring adults? It is because inexperience is often used against them by the unscrupulous and that is what happened to you, not because you were weak."

Inuyasha finally heard and understood their words and shuddered out a relieved sigh; his heart felt lighter and he could see that he would be able to put this too behind him eventually. It was far too soon to say it was a healed scar but he could say it was healing. Sesshoumaru had been silent during all the exchanges; he too was grieved but was unable to shed tears at the time. He wanted to comfort his brother but felt pushed away by his guilt and Inuyasha's withdrawal and anger at him.

The Daiyoukai understood only too well how Inuyasha was feeling this time, only they had fully known how things had stood between them so often in the past. But as he remembered why he hadn't gone to Inuyasha that night, when his custom was to protect the boy albeit from a distance, his shame for being such a shallow creature intensified.

That day was one where he and Inuyasha had fought and Sesshoumaru had beaten the boy for his insolence in demanding that he be left alone and not tormented anymore. Sesshoumaru had called the child degrading names as usual but instead of the tears that used to come, insults had been hurled back at him. The youkai had lost his temper and harshly thrown Inuyasha down into the mud and presumably that is why the pup was bathing when normally he hid.

Sesshoumaru had stormed off in a moment of pique to leave the whelp to his fate that night, which is why Myouga had such a long job finding him. It was Sesshoumaru's fault that Inuyasha was out in the open and his fault that Inuyasha had had no answer to his desperate cry for his brother's help. He would of course have gone had he known, and then probably made his little brother feel even more worthless with cruel words and insinuations.

Now he was unsure of how to proceed, he saw the pain in Inuyasha's eyes and wanted nothing more than to erase it forever, but at the moment with his memories of the past so fresh, the pain was directed at Sesshoumaru as a primary cause of it. The thought that maybe Inuyasha would reject him was devastating and sobering and if it hurt him at his age and with his family around him, how much had his rejection of the past hurt the young and lonely little hanyou?

While he was pondering, Inuyasha had got up and pulled himself together; they were ready to return to the Manor. Both Inu youkai returned to their smaller humanoid forms and all four of them walked back into the Manor grounds. Before they got further in though a red blur shot over to Inuyasha and clung to him in tears. It was Shippou, apologising profusely for hurting Inuyasha and looking just like a bigger version of the little kit he had been in the days of their travels.

The fact that Shippou was now older than Inuyasha didn't make any difference now; he was the kit in need of comfort and forgiveness just as he had used to be, so Inuyasha bopped him on the head and told him to stop wailing. To the amazement of all it worked and Shippou just sat nursing a bump on his head.

TBC


	24. When Memories Returned

Chapter 24 When Memories Returned

Warning. Angst.

Inuyasha didn't feel awkward in going back to face everyone who would now know about what had happened. Most of them were full youkai and therefore were not embarrassed nor made Inuyasha feel strange. They were angry that a child had been hurt and that was all, but knowing that it was impossible now to get revenge on the perpetrators they left the child to his parent's care. The underlying emotion of inadequacy that Inuyasha could feel because of his humanity was inexplicable to most of them.

To a youkai who had superlative healing power, the damage physically would have been minimal and as long as retribution was had, the internal youkai was appeased. Although that retribution would be severe for attacking a child of any sort and grief for any injuries would be encouraged at the time until the normal body balance was achieved. That is not to say that grief was unknown, it was only that it was not usual for it to be buried.

Only long term grief because of death was fully understood although most now knew humans were different in how they dealt with trauma. This was not exclusive however and sometimes natural stoicism was enhanced by training, because Sesshoumaru held grief for his past actions towards his brother and the Youkai's deep emotions were intense.

Sesshoumaru watched closely how everyone came up to Inuyasha when they saw him and just enveloped him in love and acceptance; there were angry growls and words about what had happened and some were sniffing at the boy as if to make sure he had no lasting damage. However when it was obvious his grief was spent and that he was physically fine they backed down. It would have been amusing had the circumstances not been so serious.

Instincts were hard to ignore though and Sesshoumaru understood that for all of them Inuyasha was still a pup and had been abused as a pup, therefore they were checking he was healed; instincts didn't realise that many years had passed between his lives. For those few now who had known him through both lives however, remembered he also was human in heart and waited until later to see him.

Kouga came forward and hugged him, glad that Inuyasha didn't pull away from his embrace and said in an emotional growl that he would have killed them if he could. Inuyasha leaned into Kouga's shoulder wanting the comfort and strength of the Wolf, and he remembered the wild dogs and knew that Kouga would have done so, although he would probably have eaten the evidence at the time.

Kagome still had to suppress a smile at the scene of Uncle Kouga holding Inuyasha firmly, making sure that the pup had no lingering fear of him as a male. Now was not the time, but it was still a little bit strange to her, however natural it seemed to Kouga and Inuyasha. Kouga however noticed that there was strain between the two brothers and knowing more of their past, he could put two and two together.

Normally it would be Sesshoumaru who Inuyasha would cling to for the paternal security he still often needed, but this time he was requiring it from Kouga. The Wolf Prince could understand that there had been hurtful words said, memories revisited had caused them in the past; but this had the potential for causing a rift which was not something either of them wanted. Kouga could see the sideways glances from Sesshoumaru that were ignored by Inuyasha and so he knew that it was the younger one who was not yet ready to go to the elder.

But the Wolf would not interfere, not yet at least; they would have to sort it out between themselves. And it had better be soon he thought, as he felt Inuyasha sag against him when Sesshoumaru finally walked away from them. But Sesshoumaru was not leaving because he was angry; he had seen Rin out of the corner of his eye sitting on the chair swing alone and he sat down beside her.

"Oh Sesshpapa!" She started to cry and laid her head in his lap;"My poor first baby, I never knew."

"Neither did I Rin." He replied stroking her hair and refraining from stating the obvious, that it had happened long before she'd been born. But she realised this herself and laughed humourlessly.

"What I mean is, we often spoke together once he got his memories back; we are close Sesshpapa, we shared our experiences as our lives had some similarity. He told me many things, his life was so hard it made me feel well cared for and of course I was once you found me. I know he'd been jealous of me because I had your love and he never had at the time, but we'd got over that. Both of us had known hunger, fear and terrible loneliness; but he never told me or asked if I had ever…"

"Inuyasha thought he had dealt with the issue at the time Rin; but he is healing properly now."

"Well done, I am glad you can help him now Sesshpapa."

"I cannot take credit for that my Rin; he is very angry with me right now, I failed him yet again. It was my fault I was not there to stop it happening. In my anger with him that day I left him unprotected when he was at his most vulnerable."

"My poor puppy; my poor little puppy, I should have been there for him." Rin was not fully aware of her words, she felt only the sentiment; but Sesshoumaru heard her and silently in his heart offered his apologies to, and begged forgiveness from Izayoi and his father for letting his brother down so badly.

"Will he forgive me this time Rin?"

"Of course; my first baby loves you Sesshpapa, he always has." She was so certain but Sesshoumaru could not share her optimism; everything had a point of no return, surely Inuyasha had reached his. Had anyone been looking at him they would have seen the sun reflecting on the shimmer of tears that glazed his eyes at the thought that this betrayal was too big for even Inuyasha to forgive.

Inuyasha's heart was huge and Sesshoumaru had already been forgiven the past cruelties, but this particular one had not been discussed on those terrible days when the pup's memories returned. As he rested his hand on Rin's shoulder and let the warmth of the sun comfort him; Sesshoumaru remembered clearly;

_FLASHBACK_

It started when Sesshoumaru woke very early knowing something was out of place in the aura of the Palace. Immediately on alert as he knew that his subliminal senses were to be trusted, he moved stealthily about the Palace stretching out his youki to find the anomaly. He found it in Inuyasha's room and although the pup was not there, something had happened; his scent had changed, it had become laced with fear and apprehension.

Reaching out once more with his youki, he found that Inuyasha was not in the Palace or grounds and alerting Hanataba, Sesshoumaru set out to find his brother. He became slightly disturbed to find the trail leading towards the old village; Inuyasha had always enjoyed his visits to the elderly Miko but she and the Monk and slayer were dead and gone, humans had such scant lives. There was nothing here for him now.

Inuyasha was standing by Goshinboku, his hand resting against the scar on the bark where he had been pinned by Kikyou's arrow as he looked high into the branches. He was pale and calm, although Sesshoumaru could scent the salt that clung to him and the stain of tears was clear on his face. Of course he knew that Sesshoumaru was near;

"I** am**_ 'The hanyou who was like Inuyasha'_ in the stories you all like to tell." He stated quietly. "I am the hanyou of the Shikon no Tama, how is this possible?"

"How do you know that it is you Inuyasha, what has brought you out here so early and in such turmoil?"

"It was like a dream and yet it wasn't, there was a strange human woman who told me it was time I woke up my memories; then I seemed to be standing right here as I am now and I became a small child held in your arms. What does this mean Sesshpapa; is what…Midoriko says true?" He waited while Sesshoumaru gathered his thoughts.

Inuyasha was the exact age now that he had been when Midoriko had changed him with the Shikon Jewel and Sesshoumaru had no doubt that this revelation, which had been promised at the time was a true one. This was the final act of the Jewel to restore Inuyasha's previous memories to him when the boy had lived a happier new life. But Sesshoumaru was afraid to answer; his own role in the history had been played down to only the heroic moments, so that Inuyasha did not know that his beloved Sesshpapa had ever hated hanyou. He thought that now the truth was out; there was no way he could lie.

"It is true Inuyasha; your memories were sealed away until Midoriko freed them, the jewel granted your wish to become a child again." His voice was pained and low as he watched Inuyasha shake his head in denial. The memories hadn't come back as a big explosive vibrant light, or crowded his brain with images; in fact there was nothing violent about it. For Inuyasha they were just there as if they always had been or as if someone had opened a door in his mind with a key.

He remembered his little group first; as he had known Miroku and Sango, Kagome was the girl he had cuddled first as a small pup and now things started to fall into place. He remembered Shippou and how his time overlapped and it was too much, how was he to face these he knew in one way knowing what he did now? His whole life was a fabrication; and Inuyasha passed out, Sesshoumaru could tell from the boy's heartbeat that he was going to faint and he caught him and carried him home.

Inuyasha awoke before they reached home but was too quiet for Sesshoumaru's liking; considering he did not often carry his brother anymore, he was expecting some recognition. But Inuyasha was deep in thought and seemed to hardly notice even when he was taken to his room. Sesshoumaru ordered him breakfast in his room and went to tell Hanataba that Inuyasha's memories had returned.

When Sesshoumaru had had his own breakfast he went back to Inuyasha's rooms; he would not ignore the boy or duck out of any questions that might be coming his way. He was not prepared for the sight that met him however, that of Inuyasha curled up in the middle of his futon crying his heart out. He moved to gather the pup to him but backed off when Inuyasha pulled away; so instead he called for him to come to him.

Inuyasha knew that Sesshoumaru's tone did not allow for disobedience and stood up to face his brother. Sesshoumaru drew him close and stood him between his knees as he used to do when the pups were smaller and he wanted their undivided attention, usually when they were in trouble. Such was not the case now but it felt good for him that his pup still obeyed.

Looking at the boy now he couldn't help but wonder, was he really the same age, Sesshoumaru could remember exactly how his brother looked when they had finished off Naraku. But the pup standing in front of him now had not had the same hard life and looked the child he was. However he knew the age was right; he had always known then how young Inuyasha was.

"Speak to me my pup; tell me what you are remembering now that causes your heartache." Sesshoumaru said gently, he knew though only too well and he was afraid of how this was going to turn out. He had had nearly two hundred years with the guilt hovering over his shoulder, to think about this day; the day that his brother found out about his past. A past that Sesshoumaru couldn't put behind him ever; not until he had worked it through with Inuyasha at least, and obtained his forgiveness, if that were indeed possible.

"Your pup? These memories Sesshpapa, they are true? I don't want them; they hurt too much, and I don't understand." His plaintive voice was so childish; as if he wanted his father to make the pain go away and soothe his troubled sleep. These memories were like waking dreams or nightmares and so fresh that there was no escaping them.

Sesshoumaru wished that he could do so and would give anything to be able to deny that these were real. Nothing mattered to him at that time more than his distressed pup, not even his Kingdom. Fresh tears streamed down his brother's face when he saw that Sesshoumaru could not deny the reality. Unfortunately this was to be the pattern whenever Inuyasha saw someone who had played an active role in his past; the memories became more immediate, coming to the surface in breathtaking clarity.

"You hate me, you wish me dead; Oh Sesshpapa you don't love me, it's all a lie isn't it?"

"It is not true, not now; search your mind back to just before you were changed back to childhood, what did Midoriko say to you, why could she change you? Wasn't it because I was repentant of my treatment of you and wished to have the chance to give you the childhood you deserved?" Sesshoumaru hastened to try and reassure the pup.

But it was too much for the young hanyou to absorb, all he was remembering was his prior knowledge of his brother and his hatred for the boy from being a small pup onwards. He remembered the cruel words and deeds in their entirety and nothing Sesshoumaru could say or do now would erase them. All the grief and tears that Inuyasha had ever bottled up seemed to come out and for a couple of days, Sesshoumaru stayed with him while he grieved.

Sesshoumaru lost count of the number of times Inuyasha just wailed _'why' _when he wasreminiscing; sometimes not even waiting for the answer before he was on to the next episode. The Daiyoukai couldn't keep up; the grievances that he had committed on his brother flowed like a fast flowing stream from Inuyasha's mouth. Sesshoumaru hadn't realised how much damage he had done over the years and his own heart was near breaking because he couldn't stop his pup's anguish.

Neither realised at the time that it was only because of the security and love he had in his new life that Inuyasha could face and ask questions about his old. He cried broken hearted on and off for two days; nobody else came near for the whole time; they realised that the brothers had to come to terms themselves, it was between them alone.

They were both getting exhausted; totally spent from emotion, Inuyasha expressing his without reserve and Sesshoumaru was calm on the outside but in tatters in his heart. But something had to give eventually and it was Sesshoumaru's calm façade; he spoke with exasperated frustration, raising his voice.

"What would you have me do or say Inuyasha, how can I help you before you make yourself ill? Please…please tell me what to do. What reparation can I make?" Sesshoumaru's plea was not lost on his brother who could hear the sincerity in his words and more importantly his voice. Before he could coin an answer however Sesshoumaru carried on speaking in a quiet solemn voice.

"Would you miss me if I died Inuyasha; you are the same age I was when I lost father. He was my world and I still miss him; I hated you and your mother for his death, I was wrong, very wrong but I missed him so much. I had great power and had been spoilt, all of my hurt I put on you for all of your previous life; but I regret my actions so much Inuyasha, but I don't know how to make this up to you or how to ease your heart…"

He suddenly found tears on his own face and dashed them away angrily, only to find more falling. But the sight of his brother crying against his will, sobered Inuyasha like nothing else had and he came to Sesshoumaru and for the first time since he'd been brought back he touched his brother of his own accord.

"You can cry Sesshoumaru, if you want…"

"I don't deserve the luxury of easing my heart with tears or to be forgiven."

"Sesshpapa, I love you; I always have loved you, that's why I hurt so much." Inuyasha went and put his arms round Sesshoumaru waist and leaned his head on his brother's chest and Sesshoumaru could hold out no longer and burst into tears that surprised both of them and he wept along with his brother. The stoic Lord could no more stop himself than could Inuyasha but his apologies and protestations of love for his pup finally reached the boy.

For many hours after that, Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha just talked; the elder opening his heart to the younger and in doing so gave him the greatest gift he had ever received. Inuyasha did not harden his heart against his brother's great sorrow but instead welcomed it and Sesshoumaru was able to believe that he had gained forgiveness and that they could put the past behind them.

Neither of them told of what happened or what was said during those two days, not even to Hanataba and neither would. But when they came out of Inuyasha's room exhausted and hungry, she was there as normal and ignored the red rimmed eyes and splotchy cheeks that still bore testimony to the purging of misery that had happened.

For another day Hanataba watched them as they recovered their equilibrium, not asking questions even of Inuyasha; besides he would never say. Sesshoumaru had been burned and scorched through to his very soul, all for the sake of his little brother and he had accepted the refining; every tear the elder shed and all his remorse was also a gift for Inuyasha, and one so precious that the pup would never share it with anyone else.

_END FLASHBACK_

Sesshoumaru was still sitting reminiscing on the swing chair with Rin when he became aware of Inuyasha's shadow crossing him. Inuyasha asked Rin if he could have a private word with his brother and the girl smiled and said _'of course'_ before going inside. Sesshoumaru tried to keep a calm exterior but found that he could not look Inuyasha in the face. His memory of their time together was so fresh he felt that he was back there again.

Inuyasha observed him for a moment before sitting next to him and wiping the stray tears from his brother's cheek.

"I am sorry Sesshpapa; I was disrespectful, you didn't deserve all that."

"Inuyasha, I really never knew, you never told me."

"No, we only talked about us and generalised everything else."

"You could generalise something so horrific?"

"Feh!"

"What other things have you still got hidden Inuyasha, what other cruelties have you suffered that I should have prevented?"

"That was the worse; I don't want to think about it anymore though Sesshpapa and I want you to stop weeping, haven't I cried enough for both of us though the years?" Inuyasha buried his face in his brother's shoulder and let Sesshoumaru hold him as he'd wanted to do right from the start.

Kouga kept everyone away from where they were, allowing the pair to talk and heal together as they had done in the past. Their bond was very strong and now would survive anything as long as they could talk together.

TBC


	25. Welcome Home Again

Chapter 25 Welcome Home Again

After nodding his thanks to Kouga, the brothers walked back to their family room in the Manor where they were promptly swamped by the older siblings who so far had not seen Inuyasha. Sesshoumaru wanted at first to give his brother space but Inuyasha welcomed the hugs and kisses. It was still a soothing balm to him to be shown love and he never tired of it.

The older ones were sensitive to their brother and understood the special relationship he had with their father. Shami wiped away his tears that had fallen because he knew he was cared for, and kissed him, holding him tightly to her. She had felt so angry for him that she had had to go and take out her aggression in the dojo; where Sesshoumaru had constructed a special room for his pups to do just that, rather than have them transform or wreck any trees.

Sesshoumaru left Inuyasha with his other children; knowing that they would help more than anyone else to bring the boy back to normality for now, while he went in search of Mama. She was with Kyouko and Kagome, who had told them what she knew of Inuyasha's state of mind. When Sesshoumaru entered the room and wished to speak alone to Mama, Kyouko took Kagome out into the gardens. Sesshoumaru got straight to the point;

"Amai, please I need your assistance but I do not know precisely what it is I need to ask." For the first time since she had known him, Sesshoumaru sounded so unsure. But for all the fact that she was centuries younger in years than the Daiyoukai, they were equals in the experience of bringing up their children relatively speaking.

"You wish to know if Inuyasha is hiding anything else don't you Sesshoumaru?"

"I do, I had thought we'd discussed his past and come to conclusions years ago, but that has been proven a false thought. Do you know of anything else that it would help both of us to know? I understand if they are confidences and do not ask you to betray them, but in you alone Inuyasha confided his worst problems."

"I did not know of this last one from Inuyasha, but of course he had lived alone for many years and no one was kind to him; you know of his life Sesshoumaru, many awful things happened to turn that sweet tempered little pup into the aggressive, suspicious and sometimes violent boy I learned to care for."

"This indeed I know, it is actualities I need; Inuyasha says that this was the worse thing he has endured."

"Then trust that it is, he doesn't lie; just keep the path of communication open, encourage him to talk to you, tell him that neither of you wants to go through this lack of understanding again. Part of being human is hiding your thoughts and feelings away and this applies also to Inuyasha; especially if he feels he is letting you down by acting a certain way.

"Most of the time he is definitely youkai, but his humanity is there and you have done a wonderful job in understanding him, however look for some of the things he doesn't say even more carefully, and encourage him to speak."

"And if he won't?"

"He will if you persevere with kindness; I shouldn't worry too much, in the time you have had him since he regained his original memories this has been the only major problem and believe me had it not been, it would have come out sooner in other ways."

"I am indebted to you Amai."

"No Sesshoumaru; just keep looking after your children as you do and have patience with Inuyasha." She smiled at him and he looked at her, relieved in his mind that she was not overly concerned about his brother now. "Do not forget Sesshoumaru, he now has the wish of his soul; do not doubt the good that has been done, it can't be so easily thrown away and trust in the love he has for you and Hanataba."

Meanwhile Inuyasha had spied Kagome walking in the gardens with Kyouko and his heart sank a little; he would have to have a word alone with her. He whined in his throat and Kyouko heard him and the plea in Inu that was contained in the sound; nodding his head, he escorted Kagome back in and left her in Inuyasha's rooms to await the hanyou.

As soon as he walked in, Kagome ran and put her arms round him, covering his face in kisses before sitting down and holding his hands. Her eyes were very bright though and he could tell that she was forcing herself to act normally.

"How are you my love; have you made up with Sesshoumaru? She was pleased when he nodded and shyly smiled at her. But it was not enough; there were still questions that were left unanswered. He asked her quietly;

"How did you and Miroku know?" His eyes looked straight to her reading her as no one else could. But she was prepared for the question and wouldn't evade it for him.

"I didn't know, it had never crossed my mind even; but Miroku told me that you had reason to hate some of the villages and he told me that your way of holding yourself, I suppose your body language, gave him the clues. Don't forget he was a monk and had knowledge of how many orphaned children were abused. I know he discussed the possibility of his idea with Kaede and before you get all cross and up in the air, it was she who gave him the clues that she too had known."

"Did everyone know my secret behind my back; were they all laughing at the weak hanyou?"He whispered.

"Stop it Inuyasha; of course not. Kaede was an older and experienced Miko and like Miroku she knew all the signs. She said that you were almost fanatical about her as a child, not letting her out of your sight when Kikyou was busy because you told her that people could hurt her. Kaede never forgot that care, but as she got older especially after you were freed she understood where your anxiety had come from.

"You would sometimes say things when you had an injury or a fever and she was nursing you; times when she would make us all leave so that we didn't pick up on your business. She loved you dearly Inuyasha, you do know that don't you?"

"Feh!" He had nothing more to add, it all made sense and it was long enough ago; Miroku and Kaede had never voiced there suspicions to him at the time and for that he was grateful, he knew he would have had a hard time dealing with that shame back then. But now he had to give Kagome the option, he was sullied and ashamed that he had not even considered telling her before, allowing her to think him clean and a prospective mate.

She was so pure in mind and body to him, as she had always seemed; whereas he had lived a rough hard life and then a well cared for life, but a mixed up life nonetheless. She really deserved one of the boys like Houjou who although he couldn't love her more than Inuyasha did, was untouched and gentle with a purity of spirit easily the match of hers.

Kagome was watching him closely and could read him like a book; over the time she had spent with him in this era with no negative distractions she had been surprised how easy it was to do. Before, she and he were always hiding their feelings behind anger and stupid behaviour; which more often than not exasperated their companions while causing the couple great distress.

Now without the problems and with the truer personality Inuyasha could show because of his new upbringing, she had come to realise how much she understood him. He was not really very complex, he was very loving and thrived on love returned, combined with a strong sense of honour, family pride and immense loyalty.

In fact she realised with shock, he had not changed at all from the boy he had been. It was just that he was more secure now because he knew he was loved by his family and didn't have to hide away in shame of his mixed heritage. Besides, all the different and confusing signals he was receiving in the feudal times only served to agitate and upset him. Kagome knew that all this had been known very well by Sesshoumaru which was why he had been able to cause such hurt to his brother.

Her anger spiked when she thought about how he had been to his brother then and she saw the fear flash briefly cross Inuyasha's face. He thought her angry with him and his ears drooped sadly, although it was nothing he didn't expect or deserve. But Kagome reached up to stroke the tell tale ears, trying to perk them up again and she smiled to let him know that it was not he who was making her cross.

Inuyasha recognised what she was doing, but now was the time before he lost his nerve or even worse started to cry again. He swallowed the hard lump in his throat and called her name gently, making her look into his eyes. They were molten gold and so expressive with their depths of feeling that Kagome felt she could drown in them; but before she lost herself completely, Inuyasha called her attention once more;

"Kagome, I am very grateful that you came back for me and that you stayed to help me through but…I understand if you feel different about me now and…"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence Inuyasha; don't you dare, or I shall…I shall call Kouga and ask him to give you the hardest spanking he has ever given you in your life." She wanted to laugh for a moment at the look of horror that crossed his face but she meant it; almost.

"Kagome you don't understand; it was wrong of me, I should have told you years ago and given you the option right back then."

"Perhaps you should have, but my answer would have stayed the same; well, perhaps I wouldn't have imagined Kouga." She laughed this time at the blush that spread across her hanyou's cheeks; then coloured up herself at the sudden image of his other cheeks being made to blush. Inuyasha had followed the thoughts that made her redden and his own deepened to almost puce.

"Stop looking at me through those rose tinted glasses Inuyasha; I am physically pure, true. But I am still a woman and I know what I want and it is only you. It has been since before I even knew what I was feeling, from the first time I saw you pinned to the tree. What happened to you was not your wrong, your fault; it was a crime committed against you. Would you stop wanting me if it had happened to me?"

"Feh! You know I wouldn't."

"Well then?" Kagome leaned forward and kissed him deeply putting an end to his doubt and she welcomed him when he responded. The passion they now kissed with was greater than they had offered each other so far and threatened to overwhelm them both. Their bodies were reacting to the proximity of the other and the relief of acceptance from both added to their lack of concern and control.

But before they could reach the point of no return there was a delicate but definite 'cough' from just inside the door and they broke apart only to turn scarlet with embarrassment at the sight of Kyouko looking sternly at the pair.

"Should I ask your father to come and teach you manners and how you should behave Inuyasha?" He asked, ignoring the boy's startled face at the implied threat. Inuyasha knew exactly what Sesshoumaru had said he would do to him should he forget himself where Kagome was concerned, and he hated it when his father punished him. Seeing that the boy was still overly emotional and close to tears from the revelations of the last couple of days, Kyouko took pity and smiled at him.

"I trust that from the display I witnessed that any doubts of my daughter's continuing love for you has been laid to rest Inuyasha?"

"Keh!" He said not trusting himself with any further answer and sounding as sullen as the 'old' Inuyasha, making Kagome smile. She also looked up to Kyouko and gave him a dazzling smile too at his reference to her being his daughter. He smiled back, glad that she had accepted him and allowed her to see the twinkle in his eyes.

"Very well, this time I shall let it pass Inuyasha but only this time. It is better saved until you are mated; do not cheapen your bond."

"Thank you, I'm sorry Uncle." Inuyasha replied a little humbled by his uncle's words.

"Now it is time in any case to say your goodbyes, it is time for Kagome to be returned to her studies." He left them and went back outside where he exchanged knowing looks with Sesshoumaru. Both youkai had been outside the whole time knowing what would happen from the start, and ready to stop what had been started, when Inuyasha could be convinced that his mate to be still wanted him; sometimes pups were so predictable.

Soon, Kagome had said goodbye to Inuyasha and her mother and was flying back to university in her new father's arms, far above the view of those on the ground. Meanwhile Sesshoumaru had wanted a word with his little sibling and had cornered Inuyasha in his room. Inuyasha was suitably discomforted, as his room was still heavily laced with the scent of arousal and he knew that Sesshoumaru would not fail to know what had nearly happened.

Therefore he was expecting some chastisement that would probably mean he wouldn't be sitting comfortably for a while. Sesshoumaru let him stew; after all he understood his brother's apprehension and applauded his motives for telling the girl she was released from her promise. He also recognised the need both would have for reaffirming their love for each other; but they had promised to wait, and so a little healthy fear of retribution wouldn't go amiss either.

Inuyasha was getting agitated as Sesshoumaru was doing and saying nothing, whereas he just wanted to get it over and done with. His brother wasn't the type for a long lecture before punishing him; he tended to say what he wanted at the same time. Either way Inuyasha was going to hurt before long and wanted to be the other side of it quickly. In the end he had to resort to whining to get his message across.

Sesshoumaru merely looked at his brother quizzically, and then went back to his silent contemplation until Inuyasha could stand it no more, and actually prepared himself and leaned across his brother's knees. But still the Daiyoukai did nothing; even though he was sorely tempted, and Inuyasha waited. Waited for his brother to give him a child's punishment; although with a much heavier hand than the Lord would use on a child, Inuyasha would certainly know about it later on.

Still nothing, no words and thankfully no action; what was Sesshoumaru playing at? Now Inuyasha felt silly and got up off his brother's lap to sit on the floor at his Sesshpapa's feet and just waited. Not long afterwards Sesshoumaru looked down and into Inuyasha's eyes and yet still he said nothing and Inuyasha snapped.

"What the hell is going on with you Sesshpapa? What's with the silent treatment? I don't understand what you want."

"Precisely Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru stated and although his voice was warm his tone was severe.

"Precisely what?"

"Unless I communicate, you cannot know what I want; you assumed a couple of times what I had planned but you were wrong."

"Feh!" said a red faced Inuyasha; much to his brother's well concealed amusement.

"Do you understand Inuyasha; do you know what I am saying? This form of misunderstanding must never happen again. It is imperative that you do not shut yourself off from those who love you and can help, before problems become too big for you to handle alone."

Inuyasha thought about what Sesshoumaru said.

"I didn't mean not to tell you; it just never came up before, it's not something you can just discuss at tea." He replied petulantly, feeling that he was being rebuked harshly. But Sesshoumaru got to his knees in front of Inuyasha and took his face in his hands.

"I of course realise this Inuyasha, and I mean to rectify it too from my own negligence. All I ask is that we talk whenever you are concerned about anything past or present. I will never feel shame or belittle anything you have been through, and I recognise that what happened to you in the past can still come to mind for you. I can assure you I shall be more alert to your moods in future; I care for you far too much to neglect you."

Inuyasha lowered his head onto Sesshoumaru's shoulder hiding his tears, and in a plea for his brother to pet him again. Sesshoumaru obliged but he still had something to say;

"Oh and by the way, don't think I don't know why your guilty conscience had your bottom draped across my lap Inuyasha; you came too close today and had you gone too far it would have meant more than a spanking I'm afraid, but I understand and I am pleased for you that anything in your past matters not to Kagome."

Part of Inuyasha was annoyed to be talked to as if he was still a small child and the rest of him was grateful. He knew he was nearly considered an adult even in Youkai terms, but he still relished the safety of being Sesshoumaru's pup. It was a lasting effect from his previous life and was present even in his new life; when he thought he had searched for his brother after his mother's death, to save him from being hunted. Sesshoumaru was his safety and had been so since his formative years, he would always rely on him.

Sesshoumaru pulled away and lifted Inuyasha's chin with his fingers; making the boy look at him.

"Do you agree Inuyasha; that we talk about anything that causes you any amount of concern, however small the amount?"

"Feh!"

"No, I require a yes or no answer made to your alpha, Inuyasha." His way of enticing the pup to confide in him may not have been the way that Mama would use on her children, but Sesshoumaru was not human and required a different form of obedience from his pups. In this too,Inuyasha was pure youkai and he bared his neck in submission before his alpha.

"Yes Sesshpapa."

"Good pup." Sesshoumaru said relieved; knowing that he had secured his brother's trust in him again. Then he pulled Inuyasha to him and promised once more that he would never let harm come to him again if there was any way he could prevent it.

TBC


	26. Thinking

Chapter 26 Thinking

Life returned to a fairly normal pattern; Kagome at university and Inuyasha teaching history at the secondary school. All the new and fairly new pups and kits with a couple of new cubs as well, were often in the care of the nurse in the crèche at the manor while their parents worked or popped in for play. Pack life was a social life and all the youngsters were happy and healthy which made for a lot of noise. Sesshoumaru's offices were placed at a strategic distance from the crèche for obvious reasons.

It still could surprise him at how well he had personally adapted from his quiet, almost solitary contemplative existence, to one which was now so full of sound and the evidences of family life. Often he thought about his father and what he would make of all the hubbub; his father although an incomparable leader and general, ruthless at times when he needed to be, had adored children as was evident in the way he would always make time for games with the children of the court.

But it was not just them, he was unfailingly kind with others; the children of his servants could safely approach their Lord without fear and there had been many holidays for all when the general had been home. Days that were un-pressured and happy; true some of his peers had scorned West for allowing such liberties, but the Dog General just let it wash over him. His was the greatest empire, he was the strongest Daiyoukai and he had the most loyal servants of any household.

Sesshoumaru remembered those times as days of great joy for him; he was the beloved son of a beloved father. Looking back as a parent now, he could tell that his father had been greatly saddened by the unwillingness of his mate to give him more pups. But she was an aloof lady who had done her duty in producing a strong son and had been engrossed in making sure that the son had been worthy always of his father's esteem.

Sesshoumaru thought that his Mama would probably have been willing to bear another child once her first was fully grown, but the opportunity never arose. His father had been denied her bed too often and he had found a lovely human princess who loved him without all the formalities of his youkai mate and she had borne him Inuyasha. There was no doubt in Sesshoumaru's mind that had their father lived, none of the problems would have occurred that did between him and his brother.

Inu no Taisho had a winning way about him, and would have blended his families in harmony; such was his charisma and his mate's lack of concern. The hanyou was no threat to her son and the heir and the fact that the general's mistress was expecting didn't concern her at all; she was the mate, the Lady of the West, her position unassailable. But then it had all gone so horribly wrong; Sesshoumaru had been jealous of the time his father spent away with the human girl and didn't have the chance to see that his father would have still had time for him after the new pup was born.

With his death and then his mother leaving him in mourning, telling him that he was well able to rule in his father's stead; Sesshoumaru's family fell apart and his secure world collapsed in ruins. He had been inconsolable in his grief, but even then he wasn't allowed long before duties forced him to stop weeping and bury deep down any signs of weakness. He was young and although his credentials were never in question, the wisdom in allowing so young an heir take charge without a regent was under debate.

He proved his critics wrong of course; it was never good to underestimate Sesshoumaru, but he still grieved deep in his soul for his father and turned all his anguish and pain into cold contempt and hatred for his father's human mistress and her hanyou pup. Father would not have died but for them or at least, that is what he told himself at the time. It was only years later when Sesshoumaru finally admitted that it was the fight with the dragon that had cost his father his life and that his remaining strength only, had been given honourably in saving the lives of Izayoi and Inuyasha.

When he finally was able to admit that and realise all the cruelties he had heaped on Inuyasha were completely unjustified and unworthy of his father, Sesshoumaru knew that he was finally growing up and set out to try to make amends. Although he was not sure how he could ever gain the pup's trust, it had come out of the blue with the wish on the Shikon Jewel. How ironic that he and Inuyasha had basically the same wish.

Now Inuyasha had grown up happily again with his brother in their father's role and neither of them had been happier. Sesshoumaru had used methods his father used with him and had learned much on his own. With the coming of Inuyasha into his life, silence had gone away the first time, then when the little hanyou had gone it returned; until he sought to banish it every time he found the child to torment.

Then for fifty years he found his life was becoming a sham; no little brother to bother anymore and no one who cared for him either, except the fawning, worshipping Jaken; but no one of his own who thought he really mattered. He was lonely but unable to return to the days when he had been loved and happy, until he took in Rin; who had compelled him somehow to restore her life and took the place of the baby brother he had callously thrown away.

Of course he had seen the jealous looks that Inuyasha had given Rin when they had searched for Naraku; he knew the pup had still loved him and was deeply hurt by his care of a human child. Now with what he believed about Rin, his decision was not perhaps so strange that he took her in, but neither she nor Inuyasha knew that. Everything had changed and his silent world took on colour and light with the child and then once again with the regaining of his tiny brother, he started to live.

His father would definitely have loved the manor full of the happiness he would have recognised and revelled in. His sons and his grandchildren would have been the light of his life and he would have flirted outrageously with the women of his family, loving them all youkai or human. But above all he would have been so happy to see his sons in harmony; what parent could want more. Sesshoumaru thought how miserable he would be if his own pups ever acted half as badly as he and Inuyasha had.

Sesshoumaru sat back at his desk and studied the very familiar tapestry that hung across the wall opposite. It had been repaired many times since it had been made and showed the picture of his father, mother and himself; a typical portrait although the atmosphere depicted was not sombre but relaxed. It had used to hang in the main corridor of the Palace alone until he found a small Inuyasha one day sitting in front of it crying.

At first he had thought that the pup had fallen or hurt himself and had picked him up until the child told him the problem or calmed down. Inuyasha however wouldn't say what was the matter and Sesshoumaru thought that maybe someone was being mean to him and told him not to mind what people said.

The boy had seemed fine after that but on a couple of more occasions Sesshoumaru caught him doing the same thing again. Finally the pup said that the picture made him sad, because he was not in it nor his mother; and he knew somehow that he should not have been. It made him feel unwanted. Inuyasha could not explain exactly how he felt at the time but Sesshoumaru understood.

He could not however change history nor did he feel he should try; but he commissioned another pair of tapestries as a surprise for his brother and when they were completed and hung next to the original the reaction from Inuyasha made it all worthwhile. The first was a formal picture of Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha as they were now; the elder with his hand on the younger's shoulder looking out. Above them in a triptych was their father; flanked in slightly more subdued colours, by their respective mothers.

When Sesshoumaru first saw the outlines and early colour charts for the picture to give his approval, he found that it didn't hurt him as much as he thought. Time had passed and as his mother was still her usual self, he could see with the understanding of a mated adult some of the reasons why his father had strayed from the mating bond. He still did not excuse his father's indiscretion, but he no longer blamed the mother and loved the resulting child.

The picture now epitomised how the family would have been had the fight with the dragon not taken place. Sesshoumaru knew that it was time for this portrait to take its place in their history. The second picture to go alongside in the new gallery was far less formal; it was Sesshoumaru holding Inuyasha on his arm, with Rin and Shippou standing together in front of the brothers. With Rin and Inuyasha all smiles, the picture was obviously happy and the artist had captured the boundless energy of the three children, shown in their faces and a slight smile on the face of the adult Sesshoumaru.

Inuyasha had been overcome and wept again when he saw them; Sesshoumaru had to pick him up and carry him almost all day, but he knew that the boy was overjoyed and not miserable. Kyouko eventually relieved him of his little burden to allow Sesshoumaru private time with Hanataba and their new litter. Inuyasha remained clingy to one or other of them for more than a week and would often be found just gazing at the pictures when his studies were over for the day.

There would be more portraits added over time as the family in the west expanded, tapestries, oils and eventually photographs but the two that remained the most poignant for the brothers had found their ways into their personal studies and remained there undimmed. Sometimes even now, Sesshoumaru remembered the little pup in the corridor and wished that he too had had the freedom to just sit in front of the picture and cry for the life that was lost.

Sesshoumaru shook his head to clear it of the maudlin thoughts and decided what he really needed was distraction and so he went for a walk in the gardens, surprised at how late the day had become. Inuyasha was back from school and was relaxing on the swing with a hot drink. He was well wrapped up against the cold and kept looking behind him as he was expecting some of the younger children to pounce on him soon.

In that regard Inuyasha was very like their father, he loved the children and it had pained Sesshoumaru at how isolated the pup had been when he had no friends of his own age. Watching him as he trailed after Rin and Shippou wanting to join in but not knowing how, had caused a sharp feeling in Sesshoumaru's chest. Of course it had not taken long; Rin was a perceptive child and had soon adopted Inuyasha as her 'first baby'. She taught him how to play, helping him not mind the ears that set him apart and that he was already aware of, as being different to everyone else's. Inuyasha's first impression of the new pups had been that none of them had puppy ears as he did.

He had known the reason when he'd lived in his village with his mother, he knew what it meant by the time she died and what a hanyou was; but it was still a source of worry in his head that everyone he knew had ears on the side of their heads rounded or pointed, the position was the same and none were like his. So he had often needed the encouragement and the time to come to terms with his appearance and that now, it didn't matter in the way it had before.

All this was of course long ago and as the new pups and cubs arrived, they accepted Inuyasha without a thought he was their older brother or friend and as they learned the differences and about their relationship it still didn't matter, they were no longer taught to hate but embrace the different beings they came into contact with.

One of the things they all enjoyed was to ask any of the adults they knew to transform to their natural youkai. Most were happy to oblige and then they saw many different species and looks, as some were small and ferocious and some were large and beautiful or any other combination. Inuyasha didn't feel so left out when the transformations happened, many had ears like his then, even his beloved brother had pretty furry ones.

By now Inuyasha had finished his drink and was looking around listening and as the smaller youkai rushed out into the garden ready to play with the snow and Inuyasha, the Daiyoukai decided that he was better off watching from a safer situation. He did not fancy snowballs in the face today; not that he could not dodge them easily, but the look of disappointment on all the faces if he did something as unsportsmanlike as that would be untenable. It would not be just the small ones either; Inuyasha would be sulking as well.

The thought made him chuckle, Inuyasha was still more of a child with all his energies than Sesshoumaru ever was, even at the same or younger age; he really was just like the puppy Rin called him. Pent up energies of the day were already being freed if the screaming and laughing were anything to go by, and Sesshoumaru was about to go and see to some business when he was spotted by Inuyasha who waved for him to come out.

The Lord of the West sighed, Inuyasha had been through an emotional time and Sesshoumaru had promised that he would be more aware of the pup's emotional needs; especially with the things he didn't say. Besides how could he blight the huge and happy grin on Inuyasha's face when he'd seen that his brother was effectively caught? It was a little victory that Sesshoumaru could allow him to have.

The game did however tend to become competitive when both brothers were out and as usual, the small ones ended up watching as the older boys played. They were fast and furious and it got worse when some of the other older pups came to join in the fun; Kyouko stood watching and laughing as they all ganged up on Sesshoumaru and stuffed ice cold snow down his back. Laughing that was, until an accurate snowball hit him in the face as well and then he too entered the fray.

Mama and Hanataba came to watch, completely protected by the babies they held in their arms, for now at least; it wouldn't be long before they too would be old enough to be outside playing in the snow. Hanataba narrowed her eyes at Inuyasha and the snowball he innocently held in his hand as he smiled at them. But he turned away; his Hanamama had warned him of dire consequences if he threw it at her, all with the unspoken promise in her eyes.

When it was time to come in, there were hot drinks and snacks all ready to replenish the energy that had been expended in the active play. So after they had all bathed and changed their wet clothes, they came to sit near the fire and have their refreshment. These were times that Sesshoumaru valued most of all; the timeless games and their aftermath where everyone just talked or dozed near the fire. This hadn't changed from when he and his father and friends had done the same things years and years ago.

Inuyasha was sitting between his parents and rested his head on his mother's shoulder as she stroked his hair, separating the strands as she ran her fingers through it to help it dry off. The silly whelp didn't even know he was purring but it reassured Sesshoumaru that the boy was happy and contented. He would never know how often his older brother would check his scent and aura now to make sure that everything was normal in his body.

Inuyasha was just enjoying the attention and letting the hum of chatting wash over him as he dozed. It had been a tiring day at school with his pupils; he loved his job, but it was demanding and he still had their homework to mark so he couldn't stay here all evening, although a few more minutes wouldn't hurt. Safe and sound he slept, until Hanataba awoke him for the evening meal and Inuyasha felt very refreshed; he had dreamed of the time when Kagome too would be part of this family group permanently.

It was getting harder for him, the memory of how their bodies had melted together had awoken in him for the first time what the full delights of having a mate might entail; and his dreams were not helping him quash such feelings. If he wasn't careful Sesshoumaru would find out and make him do even more workouts in the dojo to exhaust him and he rather preferred to keep the feeling that his dreams gave him.

Sesshoumaru had other things to think about however than his little brother's burgeoning sexual feelings which were all quite normal; Shami and one of Kouga's cubs had started down the same path and were courting seriously. Neither family considered this a problem, and besides they had seen the attraction growing even before the young couple knew. It was likely that they would soon be mated as there was nothing to stand in the way; Sesshoumaru just hoped that it wouldn't cause jealousy for Inuyasha.

It didn't, or not too obviously, Inuyasha loved Shami and was very fond of her chosen, they had all grown up together; and he understood why he had to wait and they didn't. As with all matings, once the pair had decided and had permission there was no need to wait long and the date for their feast was set for two weeks time, when the school holidays were in effect and Kagome could attend.

Shami's litter mates were intolerable for the two weeks and Sesshoumaru found he was being run ragged from complaints about the pair and trying to keep up with the mischief they planned for their sister and her mate to be. In the end he resorted to old fashioned discipline once again and also took away some privileges. But it was only for two weeks and soon enough the feast came and Shami was mated.

Kagome could only stay for a couple of days around the time of the feast as she had made promises to visit with friends this holiday, some of whom lived further away on the other side to the university than she did at the shrine. She ignored Inuyasha's hurt look when she told him she would be going for a short while, and when he tried to remonstrate she told him he was no longer able to stop her like he tried to in the feudal times, when she wished to go down the well.

It left a brittle feeling in his heart when she said goodbye and he was most subdued and unlike himself when he took her back. They still went out to dinner but the atmosphere was not so happy this time and his drive home took much longer. When he went to bed that night he was afraid, afraid that Kagome had chosen some others over him and it didn't take much for his sense of inadequacy take over. Sesshoumaru and Hanataba too hated the look of defeat and the puppy ears that were plastered to the boy's head.

TBC


	27. Distances

Chapter 27 Distances

Kagome went to her new friends' houses over the holidays and enjoyed herself immensely; she had no time to think as she was wined and dined. They went shopping, to the cinema, theatre and museums during the day and parties and soirees in the evenings. They discussed and debated on everything and she had the time of her life until huge golden eyes and drooped puppy ears invaded her dreams.

It was guilt at the way she had left with no true explanation and acting like her prissy little fifteen year old self that really annoyed her. She was no possession and she could do as she pleased; this was her life and Inuyasha had no right to stop her from enjoying her university days, he would have done the same when he was a student of that she had no doubt. Or had she?

She did know that whatever things Inuyasha had done, whatever clubs and groups he'd joined or wherever he had gone at night they would have been honourable. He was strong and not easily swayed by peer pressure, he had no need to prove himself and even if the wrong crowd wanted him to do drugs, he was not going to be afraid of ostracism by a lot of punks. He'd been well trained in going his own way from very early and his second life was so full of love she knew he had not let his parents and family down.

Kagome knew with the same certainty that he had not been morally loose either; his family would have know instantly if anything like that had happened and besides so would she; it was obvious he was just as untouched in that way as she, not counting his rape which was not the same thing. So O.K. she too was a good girl, she had no interest in just throwing all caution to the wind and letting herself or her family down either.

But he had scared her the last time she'd been back; he had been so uncertain and in so much pain from the newest revelation, that they had nearly pre-emptied their mating feast. Scared, not because she was afraid and didn't want to be with him, just the opposite, because she did; very much indeed, only not yet. Kagome knew she was not quite ready to mate with him; she would have to conform to an entire way of life that was established and which Inuyasha wanted.

His soul wish, if she tried to change that way of life or take him from it she would be like Kikyou again in wanting him to conform to her wishes alone. If she accepted him as she always said she would, she had to recognise his pack and the law he lived by. If she mated him, it would also be on that understanding, which was why of course Sesshoumaru hadn't wanted the pair to have too much contact until she had done what she wanted to do.

To be truthful, the way of life held a lot of appeal for her, her Mama was happy with it and most certainly not repressed; neither were any of the other females she knew, but they had all had the chance to have the freedoms if they wanted and choose it; so did she. Her friends had been horrified that the young man they had come to know a little had been Kagome's boyfriend since she was fifteen. It was as far as they were concerned, unhealthy to be exclusive that young.

They were determined to at least set her up with males along the way, just so she knew that Inuyasha was not the only boy in the world. Kagome was not so naïve as to not know what they were doing, after all her three friends in school tried the same thing with Houjou; but she was not interested. Inuyasha was the only one for her and she loved him through and through; there was no one who could possibly compare in anything to him. Quite apart from his fantastic looks, she loved everything about him; including his insecurities and his possessive streak.

She knew he was faithful to her and she would never betray that trust, but that didn't mean she wanted it all right now. She had never minded going out with a mixed group as long as they knew she was off limits; although the only person who was likely to say that was herself, but that was no problem. Kagome knew that it was the best way, if she felt so strongly about Inuyasha she knew he felt the same way and who knows if they could stop it another time.

So she would do what they should have done in the first instance and limit the times they had together, well at least Sesshoumaru would be pleased. Kagome refused to think on how Inuyasha would feel about it however; she knew that her hanyou would be miffed to say the least, but at least their mutual frustrations would be far apart.

And so for the next year, Kagome and Inuyasha spent very little time together; she would come home and visit him and stay at the shrine with Mama and mix with her new family that included the rapidly growing twins. Inuyasha respected her wish and he understood and on the surface appeared quite content to see her and drive her back; neither wished to give up this routine.

But when he returned it was always the same, he could control himself for the rest of the time, but his youkai was always distraught when he returned home empty handed. Kagome may not realise it, but many of her acquaintances and the boys they went out with smelled of lust and passion. Some of the scents lingered near Kagome and drove his youkai to despair. Inuyasha might be sad but he did in the main realise that just because Kagome wanted space at the moment, didn't mean that she didn't want him anymore.

He remembered the fun that he'd had at university himself; but his youkai didn't, it was far more basic and however hard it tried to be patient and unafraid that his mate would leave him, it didn't work. Many of these nights Sesshoumaru would sit with the red eyed and sometimes tearful youkai Inuyasha; calming him with words spoken in Inu, which the youkai instinctively responded to, the natural language of his alpha. When Inuyasha was finally his normal self afterwards, he was always drained; but more at peace; Sesshoumaru never let him down.

These problems he was having were not for Kagome to know however; one day she would probably understand all that had happened, but it would not be right to curb her freedom by making her feel guilty. But one time it was too much for Inuyasha and he could not trust himself to take the girl back to her rooms. One of her friend's brothers had been a safe escort for Kagome for a few outings and although she had done nothing that could possibly be misconstrued by Inuyasha or anybody, his scent had lingered and permeated her hair and skin somewhat.

Inuyasha had hardly seen Kagome at all for that visit and had kept himself out of the way, leaving Kyouko to take her back. She had been disappointed and was berating Inuyasha for his jealousy out of the disappointment in not seeing him; she had known he would be able to scent the other male, but did he still not trust her? Kyouko told her sternly that it was because Inuyasha's youkai couldn't differentiate very well between friend and potential rival yet; the boy was still young in that way and he might get carried away. Kagome was sorry for that but the arrangement with her friend was far too convenient to stop, so Inuyasha would just have to get used to it.

Her next couple of visits home followed the same pattern and for the same reasons, but at least she had taken Kyouko's rebuke on board and knew why her hanyou was avoiding her. She didn't know that Sesshoumaru and Hanataba kept finding a heartbroken youkai Inuyasha hiding in their personal rooms for most of the time Kagome was home. In his parent's bedroom, where some of his oldest memories of happiness and calm along with childhood's familiar scents, was the only refuge the pup had while his future mate stank of other males.

His youkai was no longer immediately violent in having to fight for survival; but it was instinctive, and Inuyasha had been taught to seek calm when his youkai rose to the surface. They were the nights he would tell nobody about; when he would still crawl into bed with his parents, whose youkai strength would easily overpower his own making him feel safe and contained. This was still one of the things that could shame him about being a hanyou with such strong youkai blood.

None of his siblings or friends had the same imbalance and it didn't matter that Sesshoumaru reassured him that the other hanyou's would also need to be trained to control their youkai, because none of theirs knew or would know what it meant to go into uninhibited bloodlust. Youkai Inuyasha remembered his past too and although he could now have far more self control, he would never be as safe as normal youkai or hanyou who had not the strength of his father's blood or his own background.

Therefore all the pair could do was be together briefly while others were around and say goodbye with a chaste kiss whenever they met or before she left. Inuyasha always wished to appear normal around her and as many of his family as he could; he didn't relish any of them seeing his youkai state as it was so different to all the others. He couldn't transform into a true form, he was forever stuck in the limbo of transition whether youkai or hanyou; but he felt that at least his puppy ears were not so fearsome as his overlong teeth and claws.

Of course his parents knew all of his insecurities and the reasons for them, but even with much love and teaching they hadn't been able to dispel his feelings of lack of worth in those areas; much to Sesshoumaru's annoyance with himself for the failure. Hanataba just accepted it all in her stride; youkai Inuyasha was her son in the same way that human Inuyasha was and all together they made her hanyou son, foibles and all. No child was perfect, all had things to fight and overcome; the important thing was he tried and she loved him just as he was.

For Kagome it was strange and dissatisfying that Inuyasha didn't take her back to university anymore. She loved her stepfather dearly but it wasn't quite the same and she missed the goodbyes that she and Inuyasha shared before he left for home. In fact she missed him full stop; visits home just were not the same anymore, she was no fool and knew Inuyasha very well and could tell that he was not acting naturally around her.

She knew too that she was the cause of the unease, Kyouko had told her so for a start and suddenly she was lonely for her hanyou who was not only her love but more importantly her best friend. What did her new friends know of why he and she were so certain from a young age that they were meant to be together? They may have her best interests at heart but they had no understanding of the trials that Inuyasha and Kagome had had and survived together. There was such depth in their relationship already that some people never captured in their entire lives. She then felt mean that Inuyasha was suffering just so that she could have her soul's wish.

Although that wasn't quite true, he had suffered more because of her keeping company with a young man too regularly; that was something she could change without a problem. She made up her mind that she would go to these functions without an escort and just tag along with her friends; after all, she was not on the prowl and didn't feel left out without a partner. Her resolve did make other home visits more tolerable for Inuyasha, except he felt that he had failed her once he knew that someone had told her of his difficulties.

She picked up on this self loathing, goodness she'd had enough practice over the years to recognise it even in his newer life and told him that nothing he did or said could change her feeling s for him. She loved every aspect of him including his youkai and if he brought him out she would tell him so herself.

"That would not be a good idea at the moment Kagome." Said a calm strong voice and they both turned to see Sesshoumaru coming to them.

"Why?" She asked innocently; "I've not been near any one boy or really any boy at all; Inuyasha is not worried."

"This I can tell; but if you were to express your devotion to Inuyasha's youkai, it might make him feel you are giving him permission to take you as a mate right now. The youkai feels it is just biding time." Sesshoumaru explained, ignoring for now his brother's mortification that it was felt he couldn't be trusted. Kagome took his hand and squeezed it; smiling with love at the blushed and despondent face of the man she loved wholesouled.

"I apologise Inuyasha, for upsetting you like this; but it needed to be said for both your sakes. Kagome I'm sure the time will come that you can speak with Inuyasha's youkai with no need for restrictions but at the moment, just tell Inuyasha as he is. His youkai will still hear you."

"Feh!" Inuyasha murmured and Kagome laughed, lifting his spirits until he gave her a small grin in response. That time Inuyasha took her back and their relationship returned to its more normal state; Kagome was taken to dinner and realised how much she had missed the hanyou and his chivalrous ways. He could make her feel so special; as if she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen and she knew that she was in his eyes. She had seen glimpses of this in the feudal times but other circumstances usually made him shyer of showing her how he really felt. Now though, no one could deny his devotion and love for her and she felt the same way.

She had missed his slight smile and his not so well hidden smirks; his speech, his shining eyes and everything else that made Inuyasha, Inuyasha. University was fun and she loved the learning she could do, although she still hadn't decided on a direction for her future career; but she missed him so much. At all the parties she missed him, walking across the campus she missed him and at the debates she missed him, smiling as she wondered what he would say.

However there was not so long to go now until she finished her courses and what was a couple more years when you had eternity ahead of you, as she would have when she mated her hanyou? They could wait even if the waiting was getting more difficult for them; everyone had worked so hard to give her this opportunity she wasn't going to waste it.

The following summer was a time of change for many under the Daiyoukai's jurisdiction; some long standing land treaties had come up for renewal and daughters and sons were at loggerheads in the right to rule. In the more enlightened times they were living in, many had adopted the same principles as some humans and insisted that the right should go to firstborn whether male or female.

These were more than diplomatic battles, the answers could set a precedent for all and some youkai would not be averse to starting fights or even all out war. While Sesshoumaru knew that a lot of this was posturing by self important individuals, it could blow out of all proportion and needed a firm fair hand, namely his, to fairly judge each case.

Sesshoumaru called Kouga to a meeting to thrash out the implications and solutions and they were closeted in the Lord of the West's smaller office. Sesshoumaru decided that this would also provide good training and sent for his eldest sons as well as Kouga's, and reset the meeting for an hour's time which would give him time to prepare. Then he called for Inuyasha and when he came Inuyasha took his time to glance at the papers in front of his brother on the table.

"I hope this isn't going to take long Sesshpapa; Kagome will be here before long."

"It will not; I only wish you to accompany Hanataba and Amai to the town with the children, they have some urgent business to attend to apparently."

"Oh come on, they don't need a guard dog to go and do shopping; I thought you wanted real help with that whatever it is."

"This is taken care of Inuyasha; you will do as you are asked."

"I'm getting ready for when Kagome comes." Inuyasha said petulantly, he really didn't want to go shopping. Kouga came into the room on hearing Sesshoumaru's 'enter' and winked at Inuyasha knowing how eagerly the pup was waiting to see Kagome again.

"It is not asking much of you to escort Hana and the children. I know that you miss Kagome, but it doesn't take all afternoon to get ready; she is spending the weekend here. Now do not argue with me Inuyasha; I have things to discuss with Kouga, you would be bored any way."

"Go on; it will suit you far better puppy to go with the other kids to buy their sweeties than to waste your time here moping until Kagome comes." Kouga added, gently teasing.

"Feh!" Inuyasha commented and that would have been the end of it but the twins and Kouga's eldest walked in. "What are you all doing here? You might as well go, these two have important things to discuss and they don't want kids here."

"We were summoned by Sesshpapa Inuyasha; we are to discuss the treaties. Aren't you here for the same reasons?" Kenshiki asked, looking between his father and brothers. He knew something was amiss by the sudden atmosphere and the look on Inuyasha's face. The hanyou stared at his brother with a look worthy of the Lord himself. Sesshoumaru stared blandly back at him, although in his mind he knew this was not good.

Inuyasha often looked the youngest of his older pups mainly because his eyes were still round and full of expressions that he couldn't usually hide. The full youkai pups though could hide very like their sire and hold a far harder glare when wanted. But this time Inuyasha was inscrutable as he turned to go out of the door.

"It will be good for the heirs to gain experience Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru said by way of explanation.

"Koumyou is not your heir."

"He will be Kenshiki's second." Sesshoumaru frowned slightly, as Inuyasha bowed and exited the room. He was holding his dignity together and trying not to show how put out he was at not being a part of an important meeting; even though he was older than any of the other pups and should have been Sesshoumaru's second. He felt humiliated but there was nothing to be done, the days had never been when he would have ever been considered his brother's second. He sometimes felt he would always be considered a pup even though he would soon come into his own property.

"You will excuse me; Hanataba does not like to wait with the small pups." Inuyasha left without a backward glance and not caring about the heavy atmosphere he left behind him.

TBC


	28. Outing With the Small Ones

Chapter 28 Outing With the Small Ones

Before his brother got very far, Sesshoumaru had left the room and followed him, calling him back. Reluctantly Inuyasha waited for the youkai and composed himself ready for the scolding about his childish behaviour that was certainly coming. Still, he waited calmly and with a look on his face of indifference that could rival any of Sesshoumaru's masks. Sesshoumaru would have smiled at his expression but he knew the pup was feeling hurt.

"I apologise Inuyasha; I did not handle that situation very well at all." With his words Sesshoumaru defused his brother's anger and melted the coldness. Inuyasha was not going to be made to feel an errant child and was immediately more conducive to listen to Sesshoumaru. "Are you prepared to listen to me?" Inuyasha nodded in answer.

"I had just planned to discuss this with Kouga when I thought that the other boys would benefit from learning. You have already been trained with me for when you claim your inheritance. What would be your thoughts on the land treaties?"

"There's nothing to decide, the boundaries are already fair and have worked well for everyone for centuries. They should be left alone unless someone has a very good reason for changing them, which doesn't include their own ambition."

"Exactly so, you have seen it immediately, whereas the other boys will not and need to learn how to deal with such problems; however easy it is for us to see the outcome, it needs to be considered carefully to stop any further escalations of problems, in this your siblings have not your experience."

"Feh!"

"I knew you would be bored while the niceties of wording such resolutions are discussed and I do need someone I can trust implicitly with Hanataba and Amai, they are taking all the small pups and cubs and need extra help. The children all think the world of you and you were the natural choice. I meant no offence Inuyasha nor did I intend to belittle you."

"I know that Sesshpapa, it's just that sometimes…I get jealous that Koumyou gets to second his brother; it never happened for me."

"Rather it has not happened yet pup and will not for a few more years. Even if our regretful past had not happened and we had grown together under father's care, we would not have had such training together and you would not have been my second until you attained your majority. It is our age disparity and for no other reason that you have not taken up your duties as my second yet.

"The training to inherit your own property is the same as you would have to help me. I am neglectful to not have realised that you were unaware of this, but you have had enough responsibility in your life; I sought not to give you further burden. The boys of course do not have a difference in age and can be trained together."

"When Kouga said…with the other kids…"

"Inuyasha, it was just an unfortunate remark that came at the wrong time; you know and have not bothered when Kouga teased you before. We are all in an unusual situation, you will always be the pup he protected and helped to raise now; he loves you as much as his own family. I too find it a challenge to try and remember that my instincts recognise you as my pup, whereas my knowledge knows you to be our father's son as much as I.

"Sometimes the line blurs and mostly I do not think of you in any place or role, except that you are just my Inuyasha, whom I love and protect as father wished." Sesshoumaru was not above using the hanyou's feelings against him and knew exactly how to soften his brother's indignation. Inuyasha knew without doubt that it was just as Sesshoumaru said, as even the mighty youkai could not conceal a lie from his brother. The rigid lines vanished of the boy's face and a small smile appeared;

"O.K; I'll go with the ladies and pup-sit." He said with a sigh but with better grace than when he had left the small room earlier. Kouga then popped his head out of the door;

"Hey pup, can you get me some sweets, anything as long as it has liquorice." Then he winked and grinned at Inuyasha; he could of course tell that Sesshoumaru had spoken to his brother and that Inuyasha had accepted his words, as the boy's aura was once again balanced.

"Keh!" Inuyasha returned the grin; he was old enough to know that Kouga did not mean to have upset him. He pushed his head beneath Sesshoumaru's chin and waited to be acknowledged with a rumbling purr and went to find the shopping party, which was not difficult because of the sound of eager pups. It may have been loud but he still heard Sesshoumaru's soft voice;

"I would prefer some crystallised fruits please." The Daiyoukai smirked, relieved when he saw Inuyasha's hand raised in acknowledgement and farewell. At least Inuyasha didn't hold a grudge, his anger and upsets were always like a summer storm, intense but up and over quickly. In that he was the opposite of his brother; Sesshoumaru had had to learn to let his anger go when a true apology was offered.

His humour restored in the main, Inuyasha met up with Hanataba and Amai; only to find that Rin had also decided to join the trip with her kits. The youngsters were all excited once they found out that Inuyasha was to escort them, and he soon had them clamouring up him and all talking at once.

They also had the younger two of Kouga's cubs with them; Ayame was staying with one of her older cubs who had got into disgrace and had forfeited the right to go and get his treats that week. Inuyasha grimaced; he knew the cub well and had certain sympathies with the boy whose lippy mouth got him into so much trouble. Inuyasha would bring him back a small treat in any case; it wouldn't be as much as he would normally get, but he couldn't bear to feel that the child would be the only one left out. He well remembered how that felt.

The group preferred to go to a small parade of local shops than to the mall with all of the children. As it was they looked like a Mother and Toddler group out on an outing; but they were a familiar sight now as they went to the nearby park before going to the regular sweet shop, where they were highly welcome. The shopkeeper knew that this particular group always depleted his stores because they bought for many others as well as themselves.

But first it was important to work off the excess excitement before the pups could invade the small shop, and so they were allowed to run around in the park before splashing Inuyasha in the paddling pool provided by the park authorities. Not of course that Inuyasha just let them; no, he gave as good as he got, and it was not long before nearly all the water in the pool was out in the surrounding grass or soaking through clothes and hair.

All the mothers were just watching amused but knowing better than to remonstrate. Besides they had brought towels and changes of clothes for such an eventuality; knowing what would happen when Sesshoumaru told them it would be Inuyasha going with them and not just one of the guards. Once they were out and dried off the pups went to the playground apparatus and all of them wanted Inuyasha with them to slide, swing or hang on the ropes. They especially liked the small seat that hung from a long line that they pushed off and zoomed to the other end, stopping as they hit an old tyre put there for the purpose.

With Inuyasha's boundless energy, the pups were all safe, he would run alongside and catch any who looked as though they might fall; but as they were youkai and hanyou even though very young, they could easily handle anything that had been made with human children in mind. Finally after a light snack to ward off hunger until the evening meal, the group left the playground tidy and went to get their sweets.

The smallest cub was strapped back into a papoose sling on Inuyasha's back so that she didn't just wander up and down the aisles of the shop tasting and leaving half eaten sweets on the shelf. She was not yet old enough to be trusted even if she could walk. She didn't mind, she loved being up higher than the rest of the others and she enjoyed having Inuyasha's ponytail to play with. She knew that he didn't realise he made happy little growls in his throat that only she could hear when she played with his hair.

Unfortunately for Inuyasha a new curio emporium had opened up which they had to pass, before they reached the children's favourite shop and the hanyou recognizing the glint in the women's eyes, knew they wouldn't pass it by without checking it out. There was no way he was going to take all the little brats into the sweet shop on his own so he offered to take them back to the park for an hour while the ladies had that time to browse.

It was considered a good plan by all and Inuyasha scoffed, Sesshpapa would owe him big time for this but then, perhaps the look on his face if the ladies brought anything in there would be worth it. Inuyasha didn't mind really, the kids were no problem for him and they were mainly good. It was just as well, he hadn't quite the same speed or stamina today as it would be the moonless night later and his youkai was already on the wane.

While Inuyasha didn't let them go into the water again, he didn't see anything wrong in letting them play in the large sand pit. They still had plenty of time before Kyouko brought Kagome back; she wasn't due until the evening meal and would stay for the whole weekend, then Inuyasha would take her back on the Monday as this time it was a day she had no lectures. He lost himself for a while in thoughts of having Kagome home for the whole weekend and before he knew it he had been away for an hour and a half, which he thought was plenty of time for the ladies to shop; so he rounded up the children and set off to the shop again.

The mothers took one look at their sand covered offspring and glared daggers at Inuyasha; there was sand in their long and now matted hair, in their clothes and shoes even under the tiny claws. It would mean a mass bath when they all got home and sand was notoriously difficult to get completely off squirming children. Inuyasha's ears plastered themselves to his head as he listened to all the complaints and even though they had been grateful for the time he had allowed them, the mothers had hoped he would have shown more responsibility.

Inuyasha got sulky; the pups had only played not murdered anyone but he could see the point of all that sand being difficult to remove. Now he felt he had proved himself irresponsible and his ears wouldn't leave the security of his hair, even under the concealment he could feel them. Once he had been thoroughly scolded from Hanataba, Amai and Rin, women he had considered mothers of his own at various times, he heard Hanataba pronounce sentence. He would have to wash all the pups and remove the sand when they got home and no amount of pleading that Kagome would be home soon, got him off the duty.

Inuyasha brightened up at the thought that maybe Kagome would help him; she was good with and liked the small ones. They had to wait to go into the shop while the pups were shaken free of whatever sand they could loosen. Shoes were taken off and socks removed and Hanataba got out a large bristle brush to brush the hair of the pups to get out as much as she could, while heavily hinting to Inuyasha she could easily find another use for the flat side.

Inuyasha growled under his breath at the thinly veiled threat, coming on top of Sesshoumaru and Kouga's treatment of him; he was not amused, but took care not to be cheeky or any other action other than to turn his back and stick his nose in the air. He knew that it was not an idle threat so he didn't wish to force her hand; as far as Hanataba was concerned he was as much her pup as the small ones, and she wouldn't consider his age and dignity if she decided to use her brush.

Hanataba smiled to herself, catching knowing glances from Amai and Rin which was unfortunate as so did Inuyasha, and he walked away from them all in a huff. He was very annoyed and ignored them as they were calling him back good naturedly, and he marched into the sweet shop with his back straight and his arms crossed without a backwards glance. When the pups had been tidied as much as was possible, which wasn't a lot with all their squirming and fuss about wanting to follow Inuyasha, they finally were on their way and entered the wonderful place.

All the smells were intoxicating to the sensitive little noses and the sugar in the air was enough to make them excited, but they knew how to behave and what was expected of them. While they were all looking around and deciding what they wanted as treats this time, Inuyasha had already bought the confections for Sesshoumaru and Kouga. He was now choosing something he wanted and also had found some of Kagome's favourite chocolate caramels.

Before he exited the shop to let everyone else have space and to try to get a handle on his agitation, one of the little cubs ran up to him to give him a cuddle which did make his spirits rise; the child also reminded him of his decision to take a treat back for the naughty cub who had been left behind. So he turned around to do some more shopping carrying the cub in his arms and snuffling at her hair which also served to calm him down.

A man in the shop also smirked at Inuyasha as he noticed the children who had started to cling to his legs, Sesshoumaru's youngest twins were asking Inuyasha to get them some chocolate bars that were out of their reach. He hoisted the cub in his arms and as he went for the chocolate, he felt a hard sharp nudge under his arm and looked down to see the barrel of a gun pointing at his heart. The smirking man was now fixing him with a steely glare.

"Turn round there's a good boy; don't want these nippers to get hurt do we?" The man also held another pup in his other hand, restraining the boy by the collar of his shirt. Now tell your Mama and her friends not to move, or I might get nervous and let the gun off." He sneered at Inuyasha who had to think quickly and alert the family to the trouble.

"Mama, Mama," He called getting their attention instantly as he never used the tone of voice with any of them. He sounded lost and very young. "Mama, the man has a gun, he says for you all to stand still." Inuyasha watched as Hanataba assessed the situation instantly, she was on the other side of the shop and couldn't reach him or the other children without risk.

"Ladies, I can see you all in the security mirrors and none of you want my gun to accidentally hurt any of your brats do you? No silly heroics please and empty your bags of your money and jewellery and put them on the counter." He waited for them to go and do so and called the shopkeeper to empty the till and safe, all the while keeping hold of the cub and not letting the gun waver at all from Inuyasha.

But Inuyasha noticed that the man was not as calm as he was pretending to be and he had the distinct scent of hallucinogenic drugs oozing form his skin as he sweated; the two things together made for one nervous human with a twitchy trigger finger. Kouga's cub was getting scared too and started to fidget, which in turn was making her hard to hold and putting her in danger if the guy let off stray bullets.

Inuyasha whined and the man laughed at him calling him a crybaby; but it didn't matter, he could whine and speak with Hanataba in Inu and the man wouldn't realise what he was doing.

"Alpha bitch, stop man; hide bitches, pups behind shop table. Man unsafe."

"No, give man things let him go." She whined back to low for human ears.

"Will not go, man afraid, stinks, pups in danger man weapon."

"He not use weapon." Hanataba just wanted to let the man take the stuff and leave; they could get him outside the shop with the children safe inside, later. But Inuyasha could feel that the man's tension was rising especially when they heard the police outside the shop; the shopkeeper had triggered an alarm hidden on his body. This was not good, the man grabbed Inuyasha around the throat, with the gun now at his head and he still had Sesshoumaru's twins and Kouga's cubs with him.

Inuyasha could easily have disarmed the man on his own but his arms and legs were hindered with the small ones; so Inuyasha was an effective hostage. The rest of the children and the two human women were now behind the counter with the shopkeeper, Hanataba had the valuables in her hand and told the man to take them and go out the back. He just laughed asking if she wanted to get rid of her crybaby son, as he was going to take him and the young ones as hostages.

Then the situation shifted, the shop was surrounded and the police knew the name and reputation of the gunman, he was a known wanted criminal. Inuyasha was getting worried now, the pups and humans were in more danger as this attack dragged on; and if it lasted as he knew it could do, he was going to change when the sun went down. They had to do something soon, he didn't want the guy getting trigger happy. It didn't help either that his damn youkai seeping away left him nervous as well, he could tell he was getting jittery the nearer his transformation got.

He whimpered again to Hanataba and once again the man jeered at the crybaby wanting his mama.

"Alpha bitch, Inuyasha youkai leave, no moon night." Inuyasha saw her eyes widen in understanding. "Pups scared, man afraid. Alpha bitch get man."

"Not yet, Inuyasha get hurt." She stopped as the man cuffed Inuyasha.

"Stop that whining, it's getting on my nerves and if you don't shut it I'll give you something to make the noise about; the gun don't only kill you know. I might shoot the little fella in the leg or stomach; I'm already wanted for murder, one or two more won't matter to me especially since I'll plead a drug induced hallucination. You understand cry baby?"

Oh yes, Inuyasha understood; the lenient human powers would let this man get away with murder and try to help him get over his drug addiction, hardly taking into account that he knew full well what he was doing. The fact that Sesshoumaru would still kill the man no matter what, would not matter, if any of them were killed. It was time for action; Inuyasha was tired of this human moron calling the shots. He whined again and then put his head in his hands and made out that he was crying in fear; but whining only loud enough for Hanataba to hear.

"Alpha bitch be ready, get man."

"Inuyasha no…"

"Alpha bitch obey male no argue." His sharp order startled her and her instincts propelled her to obey him. As Inuyasha looked like he was crumpling in fear he suddenly reached down and picked up all the pups, ripping them away from their clinging to him and threw them at Hanataba in one fast and smooth move. Her reflexes caught them and tossed them over the counter in another while Inuyasha turned to the man his face frightening as his youkai had come out wishing to kill.

It was the wrong time for it; the man was very fast and desperate in the light of what faced him and before Hanataba could make her leap and push him forcefully to the ground he had let off all six bullets, pumped into whatever part of Inuyasha he could find. Inuyasha dropped like a stone.

TBC


	29. Touch and Go

Chapter 29 Touch and Go

Everything seemed to stand still, the shots sounding so loud and then there was silence, and you could have heard a pin drop. How long it was that the macabre tableau stayed immobile, nobody ever knew; before the police barged in and surrounded Hanataba and the man who still held the gun in his hand. He was incoherent after having seen Inuyasha as a youkai, the hanyou's concealment spell having been removed so as to instil fear. Not that he would be discovered now, it was late and Inuyasha had transformed.

Once the man was detained, the wailing of the women and children started, all of them wanted to reach their fallen pup; but the police stopped them all, Inuyasha could not be moved until he had been stabilised by the medical services. They could tell that he was alive but only just; Hanataba could hear the shallow reedy breathing that was far from normal, but the ambulance with the emergency teams was right outside.

As was Sesshoumaru, Kagome, Kyouko, Shippou and Kouga; the news had been televised already and time had passed far quicker than any of those in the hostage situation had realised. The four youkai had already ascertained that their small offspring and mates were safe and sound; the only casualty being Inuyasha who was alive but barely. Sesshoumaru had to tell Kagome the news, reinforcing the fact that the boy was alive at the moment; but he didn't tell her that his life was in the balance, even more so as he was human.

He didn't have to tell her, she knew the significance of the moonless night as well as any by now and what was worse she couldn't get near him. Sesshoumaru was very efficient even under stress; his training for quick and decisive thought was almost instinctive and he had contacted the youkai hospital already, and the team was arriving as he watched. The human medics had been at Inuyasha's side trying to stabilise his vital signs and he was ready to be moved; so they took him to the private ambulance of the youkai hospital.

Both Sesshoumaru and Kagome went with him in the back and all the others went home with the children to settle them down before following on. No one was prepared to wait at home for news, they all wanted to be close at hand; the police questions could wait until much later. Sesshoumaru's eyes never left his brother's still and barely living form and he was silent as the grave; Kagome too did not speak but watched the monitor that showed her love still breathed.

She was too upset to cry and her face was pale and pinched; what a welcome home, but how glad she was that she had been on her way today in any case. She had arrived just as the news reached the Manor, and was immediately part of the group going to find out what had happened. Now the ambulance was arriving at the hospital and Kagome was relieved to see a face she knew; Jinenji, the large horse hanyou who was a gentle giant.

Jinenji recognised her but this was not the time for re-acquaintance; he ignored both her and Sesshoumaru as he made an initial assessment himself from his observation, and what he already had from the medics who had phoned through all the details so far of Inuyasha's condition. He knew that there was no time to lose as the human boy was sinking fast. Sesshoumaru and Kagome were led to a small ante room where they waited for the diagnosis.

Eventually Jinenji appeared and went to speak with them, addressing himself to Sesshoumaru. His demeanour was most grave and he was not fooled by the calm exterior face of the Lord, he had seen too often how people reacted in bad situations; but the hanyou was confident and knew what he was talking about.

"My Lord Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha has three bullets in his leg, arm and one that glanced off his ribs. These are not serious at all and are going to be dealt with immediately. However there are three others. One is close to his spine and at this moment he has no feeling in his lower extremities; when this is removed there is a good chance that the feeling will come back, especially when he returns to hanyou form in the morning, but I have to warn you it may not.

"Another is close to his heart and he is lucky here too; it came close to killing him instantly, it is tricky but again he should be fine with no lasting damage come the morning. The one that concerns me the most however is lodged in his brain. The images show that it is not too far in but that is not the problem; he is not strong enough to face such lengthy surgery at this moment, he must wait until his youki returns.

"I will not hide from you his predicament; the bullet will have to be removed tomorrow, the danger is not his death so much as you have Tenseiga with you, but damage to the brain may have occurred that cannot be restored by his youki." Jinenji saw the tormented eyes of the youkai lord and sympathised.

"He is going into surgery now for the relatively quick operations and preparation for tomorrow now; although if he looses strength we will have to stop."

"If my brother succumbs to the bullet and has need of Tenseiga, could you operate on the brain before I use the fang?" Sesshoumaru asked softly, as Jinenji turned gentle eyes on the worried lord.

"I am sorry but that is not possible. We need to monitor brain activity as we operate. If he had his youki now we would still have to wait, but it could impede the damage."

"Would it help if I was able to feed him some of my youki?" Sesshoumaru asked. Jinenji considered carefully.

"It might, at the least it will not harm; just do not expect too highly. Your brother is very seriously ill My Lord; it is best to be prepared." Now he turned attention to Kagome and took her hands in his. "I will do my best for him my dear girl, but it is going to be rough." Kagome nodded her understanding, not trusting herself to speak and Jinenji went to scrub up and took Sesshoumaru to do the same. Jinenji had another word of caution for the youkai lord.

"Lord Sesshoumaru, I know your sword has limits, should Inuyasha need resuscitation you must please let us try it first. We do not want you to waste your sword's gift and it may happen several times that we shall need to do this. Can you trust me to let you know when and if he goes beyond our power?" Jinenji was serious; he knew how a distraught youkai could come close to transforming and there were measures in place to hold a youkai who had reached such limits, but Sesshoumaru was the strongest. He knew what was concerning the hanyou and reassured him that he was well in control.

In the theatre Sesshoumaru got a quick glance at Inuyasha before he was told to sit and take the boy's hand; this would be the only piece of his brother that he would be able to hold to pass on the youki and he started to do so immediately before anything else was done. There were machines all over but the surgeons were calm, as was Sesshoumaru until the time came to remove all of Inuyasha's long black tresses. He couldn't help but gasp and Jinenji assured him that it had to be done. The youkai sagged and then turned his attention inwards as he held Inuyasha's hand and let his youki flow between them.

Sesshoumaru stroked the hand he held from claw tips to wrist and back hoping that Inuyasha would recognise his touch somewhere in his brain and be comforted. He remembered a time when Inuyasha had first come home to the West again and he had watched the shy child follow the other children round. When Rin or Shippou had tried to grab his hand to pull him along faster, he'd cowered down and put his hands in his sleeves. Intrigued Sesshoumaru had approached Inuyasha and also tried to take his hand to no avail; the pup got most distressed and hid his hands away.

It was Hanataba who drew the truth from him. The pup had accidentally scratched his mother when she held his hand and his uncle had beaten him across his fingers so badly because of it, that he had broken them. Then he'd said that no one would ever take his hand, for hanyous were evil with claws that did damage and showed the poor child the small scratch on his mother's hand. Inuyasha had been mortified at the hurt he had inflicted on his beloved Mama and would never touch anyone with his hands again.

And he hadn't, too afraid of his claws and because he believed his uncle. Inuyasha's fingers may have healed by the next day but his young human heart had been devastated. Sesshoumaru had had Rin and Shippou come to them, and had physically pried the pup's hand open to make him take hold of his brother's hand first. He had then held it until Inuyasha relaxed; all the time ignoring the tears that rained down his brother's face, and then he placed Rin's hand in Inuyasha's and wrapped them both in his own.

It had not taken long to teach Inuyasha to be careful of his claws and that if he accidentally nicked anyone it would not mean a beating; he would not be punished for a mishap, unless he was being careless or trying to hurt by using his strength. Sesshoumaru sighed at the memory and carried on stroking his baby brother's hand while infusing his youki through his skin.

The operation was over surprisingly quickly, five of the bullets were removed by the team with little problem, except that they had to resuscitate Inuyasha twice through the procedure. Sesshoumaru did not let go while the boy was brought out of the anaesthetic in the recovery room and he was the first person the violet eyes saw for the brief moment he was conscious. Jinenji came to the lord and said that he was pleased with the operation so far, the strength that the youki had given to Inuyasha was definitely helpful and he thought they would be able to proceed the next day, if Inuyasha had a good night.

He said that ideally, Inuyasha should have a day of strengthening, before the next operation but there was danger of the bullet moving. Sesshoumaru nodded his understanding and thanked Jinenji, who said there was nothing he wouldn't do to help Inuyasha if he could. Sesshoumaru sat there for ten minutes before a new nurse came in; she had in her hands two dark long and thick braids of hair, tied at one end with a bind and the other with dark red ribbon. She presented them to Sesshoumaru saying that one was intended for Kagome; he took them gently and folded one to put in his pocket, the other he held in his free hand until he held it to his eyes and wept for a couple of minutes, partly from relief and partly from knowing that Inuyasha was proud of his hair and that it would take many months to re-grow to it's former glory.

Soon it was time to move Inuyasha to intensive care, where he would have continual nursing and surveillance; besides Sesshoumaru, who would not leave even if he weren't giving the pup his youki. As it was the transference of youki was helping Inuyasha's strength and it was not long before the others could come in and spend a minute or two to visit. Hanataba stayed the longest with her mate and son and stroking the braid; the pair shed tears together as they looked on the shorn human boy who would look very strange in the morning with his puppy ears and no hair.

In fact she stayed until the morning when the danger time of Inuyasha's youki surge as he transformed passed; the heart monitor went crazy for a moment but the doctors were on hand ready for any emergency that might evolve. None did, the hanyou whimpered for a bit but didn't wake, although he was only deeply sleeping and not unconscious. His youki was now rapidly trying to heal the wounds from the bullets and subsequent surgery and Sesshoumaru felt the pull of his own youki increase as Inuyasha used his own up.

Jinenji came in again to talk to Sesshoumaru who was looking pleased at the rate of healing that was obvious. But the doctor had to disillusion him; they could allow it for a while only and then Inuyasha would have to be sedated again, as even the slight activity was moving the bullet. On hearing this Sesshoumaru was unable to keep his stoic mask and Jinenji saw the real person behind the public face; he was distraught.

Kagome though had been thinking; she had been sitting for a few minutes and fingering the black hair braid; still black since it had been removed from Inuyasha and could not change back when cut off from his youki. She called softly to Jinenji the next time he appeared.

"You would rather Inuyasha had the next operation tomorrow and not today, to make him stronger to survive; but he is liable to start to move and agitate the bullet move, yes?"

"Yes, the risk of permanent damage increases the longer the bullet remains but he would ideally be stronger in heart to undergo such a long surgery. As it is his youki is helping him heal and he will rouse and start to move naturally; I would rather not sedate him, it will hinder the healing process but movement is too dangerous, it is a matter of balancing the risks."

"If I can make a barrier around him to subdue his movement but not inhibit his youki would that work?" Kagome asked hopefully and Sesshoumaru instantly saw the possibilities as did Jinenji.

"If you can Kagome, the less mobile he is the better and the longer you can keep a barrier going the better his chances. But we will have to be ready the moment the barrier is down to take him into surgery, so let us know immediately when you know you can't hold it anymore." Jinenji was excited; this was the chance they needed if she could do it. The rest of the family were told what Kagome was going to attempt and that she would need to be undisturbed.

So most of them went home on the understanding they would be called if there was any change. Hanataba however would not leave and waited on her own, sitting in a nearby chair and stroking the hair braid just as her mate had done before her; able to watch what happened. With immense concentration, Kagome set up a barrier and shrank it to fit Inuyasha's body pinning him to the bed with a pink glow that despite its appearance was strong enough to hold the hanyou's youkai strength. Once it was in position she could relax, maintaining the barrier was not quite so tiring as establishing it.

She had left Inuyasha's hand outside so that Sesshoumaru could still give the pup his youki; the lord was easily strong enough to restrain any movement from the hand. The room was still and peaceful; doctors and nurses were able to check the progress and Jinenji confirmed that the barrier was working. This was pleasing but after most of the day concentrating, Kagome started to flag; this time Sesshoumaru had an idea and he pulled the girl onto his lap and infused her too with youki.

This would not stay with her as she had nothing to bind it with as Inuyasha did, even when he was human his youki was dormant inside; but it was refreshing none the less and eased most of her tiredness. In addition she was now able to relax her concentration and ask questions of the doctors when they came in or speak quietly with Hanataba and occasionally Sesshoumaru. All the while, Inuyasha's body was healing of his wounds and his heart was getting stronger.

Jinenji said that at the rate things were going, they would be able to perform the brain surgery later that night; as this was the most crucial and dangerous part of the task to date, it was imperative that it was carried out as soon as Inuyasha was ready enough. Sesshoumaru and Kagome were happy at the news, and smiled at each other; the youkai even gave the girl a kiss on her cheek before turning to smile at his mate who came to them both and put her arms round them. Then she went to sit down again, Kagome was still controlling the barrier and needed to concentrate after all.

Nobody saw the golden glint from eyes that had been shut since he'd been brought to the ward; eyes that had just opened halfway for a couple of seconds to gaze on the sight of Kagome and Sesshoumaru sitting together and smiling at each other, but that didn't notice Hanataba before he closed them again. But Sesshoumaru did notice the pull again on his youki and the agitation from the hanyou trying to struggle against the bind.

Kagome strengthened the barrier and Inuyasha uncharacteristically gave up his fight; tears that Sesshoumaru couldn't smell and could only see trickled from the closed eyes and he felt helpless that he couldn't comfort his pup from whatever had upset or hurt him. Jinenji came back having seen the surge from the monitors and told them it was time; they would be back in one hour to take Inuyasha for surgery, if Kagome could keep the barrier going for that long.

When he came back with the anaesthetist, Kagome let the nurse in to give Inuyasha the pre-med shot to relax him and then they took him down to surgery. Once again Sesshoumaru went in with them and Kagome stayed behind outside with Hanataba who held the girl in her arms, giving and receiving much needed comfort. They were in for a long wait so they went back to the waiting room where there was a small table laid out with fresh sandwiches and a kettle, teabags, coffee or chocolate and a small fridge holding milk and cold drinks. In short everything they could possibly need if they found they could stomach it.

At first Kagome only wanted water from the cooler but as time dragged on, Hanataba made them coffee and insisted that the girl ate at least some of the sandwiches. For Sesshoumaru, holding still firmly to Inuyasha's hand the time was interminable; all he wanted was to see the golden eyes of his pup brother smiling at him once more and to have this horrible time put behind them, so that Sesshoumaru could be free to find the perpetrator of his brother's attack and make him suffer.

Finally it was over; Inuyasha's head was bandaged and as Jinenji said, it was all up to him now. The bullet had come out as cleanly as it went in and thanks to the barrier, Inuyasha's heart was able to keep going without any trouble this time. So there was more hope and Jinenji was far more optimistic than he had been. Now it was just a matter of waiting for the boy to come around from the anaesthetic and letting his youki heal the rest.

Never before had Sesshoumaru needed his patience as he did now; it had always come easy to him in times past, he had always seen the logic in waiting for the correct time, but this was agony. Finally though he heard a slight sigh and he leaned over Inuyasha who opened his heavy eyes groggily as he tried to focus on the face above his;

"Father? Is it really you?" The voice was weak but at least the boy was alive and the mistake about his brother's identity was easily understood; Sesshoumaru had his hair tied back in a high ponytail to make it easier to put it in the surgical hat he'd had to wear. But then recognition came into the gold and Inuyasha pulled away, fear flooding his scent as he whispered in horror;

"Sesshoumaru?"

TBC


	30. Confusion

Chapter 30 Confusion

"Please Sesshoumaru, go away; I can't fight you right now." Inuyasha's voice tailed off as sleep overcame him and Sesshoumaru couldn't hide the fear in his eyes. Inuyasha never called him 'Sesshoumaru' now unless he was upset and referring to the older times for them; in fact it was his way of differentiating between the past and present Sesshoumaru in his mind. He felt a gentle hand on his shoulder and Jinenji tried to reassure him;

"Do not be overly concerned yet My Lord, Inuyasha has had quite a lot of anaesthesia which can induce a mild amnesia for a time until it wears off. We will not yet know whether there is any long term memory loss for a few days; even with his youkai healing."

"He is out of danger though?"

"I believe so; obviously he will need to be observed in intensive care for some time yet and if you wish you can stay with him, but a word of caution, just you for now unless he finds it difficult to see you. I suggest the others including Kagome and your mate just visit; he needs peace and stillness for now." Jinenji smiled as once again Sesshoumaru took his brother's hand to infuse healing youki supplementing Inuyasha's own.

Inuyasha wasn't aware of much for the rest of the night or most of the next day, he drifted in and out of sleep; and his fear spiked whenever he awoke and noticed Sesshoumaru, although he didn't realise that his brother still held his hand. The Daiyoukai tried to ignore the hurt he felt at his brother's fear of him and tried to ignore too the hint of salt, that clung to him once again. He didn't know what memory the boy was seeing or thinking he still lived, but obviously it was not a good one.

By the end of the day Sesshoumaru was tired; he hadn't slept at all and the long drain of his youki was sapping his energy levels considerably. He was in no danger of running out, but his adrenalin levels dropped as Inuyasha was pronounced out of immediate danger and resting normally. That evening Inuyasha was moved into a private room away from the beeping machines and allowed to sleep without so many night time checks. Sesshoumaru's youkai added to Inuyasha's own had helped the healing process greatly.

At last and without him really knowing it, Sesshoumaru's eyes closed and he fell asleep in the chair next to Inuyasha bed. Soon both brothers were deeply asleep and the Daiyoukai was surprised later to find that someone, a nurse probably, had managed to cover him with a light blanket without his knowledge. That was not all that happened while he slept and without his knowledge; Inuyasha had awakened feeling quite refreshed but languid, and although he didn't know where he was or why he watched as the nightly routines were carried out.

He knew he had been hurt but not how it had happened. He supposed it was something Sesshoumaru felt responsible for as he was still in the room and they were meant to have a form of truce. Snippets of memory came to him and he understood that he must have been hurt sometime during the fight with Naraku. He felt ashamed about thinking that Sesshoumaru would hurt him and would apologise in the morning. He was sure he remembered Kagome and Sesshoumaru laughing together and his youkai brother had definitely kissed the Miko.

Suddenly with a rush everything came back to him; of course what a complete fool he was, Kagome had fallen in love with his brother and it looked like Sesshoumaru felt the same way. They had both been here after Inuyasha was injured; damn he didn't want to see them, how dare they rub his face in their love. But perhaps he was wrong, perhaps they were both just pleased that Inuyasha was alive; Kagome was his not Sesshoumaru's, wasn't she? His mind was hazy and jumbled; wasn't it a puppet of sorts? His heart lifted; the love was not real.

But there was that kiss, certainly it was only on the cheek but even so, he had never thought that Sesshoumaru would just kiss a human anywhere without a damn good reason. There was nothing for it he would have to ask Kagome; she wouldn't lie to him. The desire to find Kagome and sort out what was going on between her and Sesshoumaru grew and wouldn't be gainsaid; his mind becoming more frustrated as he tried to patch together the things he knew.

Getting up from the bed silently and quickly with the need to relieve himself, he passed the sleeping Sesshoumaru in the chair and looked down on his brother. It felt nice to be cared for by Sesshoumaru and he would let him know that he was grateful; but now other things were needing attention and he made his way to the en-suite cubicle. When he had finished he stood by the window enjoying the cool breeze on his forehead. Whatever had happened had left him with a headache of momentous proportions and made him dizzy, not to mention a huge bandage on his head which made his hair feel strange.

The air coming from the window reminded him sadly of the fresher air of his time; the fumes lingering told him as if nothing else could, that he was in the future and that somehow Sesshoumaru had been able to get through too. Was this because he was now Kagome's intended and not Inuyasha? His brain seemed confused, Kagome was his answer and if he could get to her everything would be sorted out. His decision made, Inuyasha climbed out of the window and was gone; following the well known route over the roofs towards the shrine. The wind in his face felt good as for some reason he now felt slightly fevered and he soon reached the welcoming arms of Goshinboku.

Some time passed before Inuyasha felt he had his bearings, he was a bit dizzy and it took a while for the world to stop spinning but he was on familiar ground here; it didn't take him long to reach the sill of Kagome's room where he pushed at the window to let him in. This time it refused to give however and Inuyasha was puzzled; Kagome never closed the window against him. She had said that she knew of a story called Peter Pan; where a little boy had been lost, but when he found his way home, his mother had a new child and had closed the window to the nursery and it had stopped Peter from entering.

Kagome had always felt the story sad and had told Inuyasha she would always leave her window open; not that she thought of him as a baby, but she often felt that he was lost and she would never let him think that he was unwelcome at any time or had been replaced. She had told him this story on one of his human nights, when he had let slip that it had always had upset him to be on the outside looking in. Had she betrayed him; had she replaced him, with Sesshoumaru?

He couldn't get in at the window, he was so tired and his head was still hurting but he had to know; so he tried the front entrance. It too was locked but that didn't deter him, as he broke the lock and slid the door open to creep silently inside. All the familiar scents were here plus a few new ones but the place seemed empty. He didn't like the echoes of his own breathing in an empty house as even here shadows could hide danger. He opened the door to Kagome's room and was bombarded by scents.

Inside the door Inuyasha stopped, his heart wanted to break; he'd thought his injury must have happened at Naraku's hands but clearly it must have been some time afterward. Two cot beds placed side by side were in the place of Kagome's bed now; hardwearing children's toys filled a box in the corner where she had had her desk and his nose could scent the hanyou twins clearly, the scent was familiar. The proof his poor brain needed was on the dresser top where photos of Kagome holding and playing with the twins were smiling out at him.

Mama was there also proudly holding the grandchildren with the puppy ears she had always craved and uncle Souta beaming his huge smile. But it was Kagome's smile that undid him, she stared out of the pictures so proudly and so full of love for her babies; the babies she'd had with Sesshoumaru that should have been Inuyasha's pups. What had happened to him then; had he fought Sesshoumaru over this, had his brother come to live here with Kagome or had he chased her wanting to get rid of his offspring? Surely not, who after all could have taken the final shot of the whole Higurashi family with the hanyou pups; all looking so happy and complete if not the 'loving' father.

Unable to think anymore, Inuyasha ran outside and to the well house, wanting to get away from the future and back to his present. Perhaps Sango or Miroku could tell him what had happened; maybe Kaede would let him live with her, he couldn't possibly be around Kagome and Sesshoumaru and their pups. He leapt into the time portal and landed with a sickening thud on the earth beneath him, a residue of pain inched along his spine but it did not deter him from trying again and again and again.

It was the final straw, he couldn't get back and was stuck in this time where once again, no one truly wanted him and he had been passed over. Inuyasha lay on the bottom of the well heartbroken and heaving great sobs; his tears making a puddle around his face. He hardly noticed when gentle but strong arms lifted him from the ground, wrapping him in a warm blanket and cradled him to a firm body. Then his senses told him who had him and he started to fight;

"She was supposed to be mine you bastard, she was going to have my pups not yours, why did you take her Sesshoumaru, why did you bring more hanyou into the world? They will learn to love you so quickly and you will break their hearts when you scorn that love and turn them away; don't you realise…don't hate them Sesshoumaru, they didn't ask for you to sire them or to be born hanyou. They are so pretty; they were supposed to be mine, my pups."

Sesshoumaru saw a photo sticking out of Inuyasha's pocket in the hospital gown, it was Kagome smiling with her new hanyou siblings; and of course the youkai now knew what Inuyasha had thought. But first things first, the boy's strength was failing and more rapidly than his marvellous recovery should have allowed. He had not been hard to track for Sesshoumaru; the thought that Inuyasha might be lost in his mind at the moment, meant that he would more than likely make for the shrine as it was the only place he really knew.

Sesshoumaru had awoken instantly the nurse seemed concerned; she had not been able to find the boy when she'd come to check him, and it didn't take much working out that he had gone through the bathroom window. Sesshoumaru had left immediately taking the same route and followed his brother, he'd tracked his scent to the twin's room and back to the well where he could see and hear Inuyasha at the bottom.

When they reached the hospital again, Inuyasha was taken straight back to his room and lightly sedated; not that Sesshoumaru would sleep again and be caught out, but right now Jinenji was talking to Inuyasha and the replies were worrying. Inuyasha didn't know how he had got stuck in the future or where he had been since the death of Naraku. All he knew was that once again he'd been betrayed and was worried that Sesshoumaru would not love his hanyou pups. When Inuyasha realised that Sesshoumaru was still with him he closed his eyes and turned away. Soon he seemed to sleep, his breathing getting softer.

"Jinenji, it appears that some scars never heal." Sesshoumaru said sadly to the horse hanyou after quietly observing the white lines of old injuries that still marred the surface of his skin. Jinenji gave his full attention to Sesshoumaru; he held his arms out ahead of him and looked at them too and smiled at the Daiyoukai.

"They heal My Lord; you can only see where they were, but there is no pain and they do not affect my work or movement in any way, but at some times they stand out more than at others. The light might catch them or if I am feeling unwell which is not often, they are very noticeable when my skin pales. They are always there and are part of me, there is nothing that can undo what life has thrown at you; but they _have_ healed. Inuyasha is the same; the scars of his mind are just more noticeable because he is unwell at the moment; but they are healed and you know this. When he is fully recovered, those scars will not show nor give him grief; just be patient a little while longer My Lord."

As they were talking though Inuyasha's breathing suddenly slowed down to dangerous levels and Jinenji was immediately by his side to check him over and calling a nurse to get a machine to make him breathe, on standby. Then until Inuyasha came round and could be talked to and reasoned with, he would be monitored by machine continually. Everything happened quickly and Sesshoumaru was called to Inuyasha's side only to find he was being stared at by the ruby eyes of Inuyasha's youkai. With Inuyasha's mind in his past and no Tessaiga, the youkai was far more dangerous and animalistic.

Sesshoumaru tensed ready to spring if necessary; the youkai in front of him regarded him warily as he took in the gulps of much needed oxygen that he was getting from the mask over his face. Inuyasha's heart rate started to climb again to more normal levels and Sesshoumaru decided to try to talk to him although he didn't let his guard down; but he was sure the youkai was looking intelligently at him.

"Inuyasha; can you respond to your Alpha?" He asked normally, aware of the youkai staring at him still. Inuyasha nodded and his deeper voice said;

"Speak Inu to Alpha. Private."

"Alpha understand. Do you know Alpha Sesshoumaru?"

"Inuyasha know brother."

"What name do you call me Inuyasha?" There was a pause in the answer of this question while the youkai looked confused.

"Inuyasha know you Sesshpapa. Not always name. Sometime bastard. Hanyou asleep now."

"Asleep inside you?"

"Yes. Hanyou Inuyasha not want awake saw alpha kiss once mate. Not want breathe, to much effort not worth life. That's why I come." His calmly spoken words sent a chill down Sesshoumaru's spine.

"You stopped him?"

"Yes. He is hiding, Inuyasha hanyou not remember now only then."

"Can you help him; do you know the truth about now?"

"Yes youkai know truth; can youkai help, I don't know."

"Lord Sesshoumaru; I must insist that Inuyasha be allowed to rest now, he will carry on oxygen and be monitored constantly. I am going to sedate him so he does not fight the treatment and sir I am aware that he caused this but it will not happen again while he is observed."

"I wish to stay with him."

"Of course." Jinenji had refreshment brought in for Sesshoumaru but he had gone to sit by his brother's bedside and was not interested in food or drink. There was no change in Inuyasha for the rest of the night and as the daylight filtered in, Sesshoumaru was aware of Kagome and Hanataba entering the small room. With a quiet voice and even tone, Sesshoumaru explained what had happened and that Inuyasha seemed not to remember anything after the defeat of Naraku.

He told them that Inuyasha had jumped to wrong conclusions about Kagome and Sesshoumaru, that he thought Amai and Kyouko's pups were his brother's and he mentioned that the boy was confused and yet his youkai was not. Kagome was very distressed about this news and with tears running down her face she said;

Sesshoumaru, I have always admired you even when we were reluctant allies or perhaps even before. Now you are my uncle in a roundabout way and hopefully my brother-in-law or father-in-law of sorts in the near future. But as Alpha of our pack, I am begging you now to let Inuyasha mark me as his intended if not his mate; I have nearly lost him and it is silly to spend all my time away when I know I love him and want to be with him alone. I have greatly enjoyed my learning but I miss him so much and I was so afraid…" She wept, unable to keep her composure anymore and Hanataba put her arms round her.

"Kagome you were and are entitled to have your soul's wish, whatever that may be. We can consider this only when Inuyasha is fully recovered. But I promise you I will consider it." Sesshoumaru was firm but he did understand the girl; he had never doubted her love for Inuyasha but she had to come to realise for herself what was more important in her life and she'd had a lot of growing up to do, a fifteen to eighteen year old human was still a child whether they recognised the fact or not.

But she was now twenty one and her early experiences had matured her; she had used her knowledge wisely to build her character and it showed. Sesshoumaru still thought she might as well finish her last year or so at university; but would leave it to the young couple to decide between them, that is providing Inuyasha came back to them fully. She might have to wait for him now; but Sesshoumaru would not allow Inuyasha to be put under pressure, if he had to learn again how his life had been.

For his brother's sake, Sesshoumaru hoped that Inuyasha would be able to be helped by his youkai; the pup had had a happy and fulfilled childhood, well loved and cared for just as he'd always wanted and deserved the second time. It would be totally wrong if some human lowlife had now robbed the boy of his souls' wish by causing damage that wiped his memory of all the good, and leaving him only with the sadness of his first life.

The unobtrusive but ever present nurse brought Sesshoumaru coffee and insisted politely that he drink it. Hanataba had taken Kagome out again, to get refreshments for them both and to let any others who were arriving know that Inuyasha was out of danger but still confused. While Sesshoumaru was busy with his coffee and croissant, the nurse checked his brother and wrote down her findings just in time for Jinenji to personally check the pup. He told Sesshoumaru that Inuyasha would rouse some time that day and they would be able then to assess him more fully.

It went quiet again once the checks were over and all Sesshoumaru could hear was the sibilant sound of the oxygen as it fed his brother the life sustaining gas. Inuyasha looked so very young and innocent that Sesshoumaru's heart clenched miserably for the pup and for one of the very rare occasions in the Daiyoukai's life, he felt defeated. There was nothing he could do to make this better and he felt all the despair of any parent faced with the life changing illness of their child.

Inuyasha was peaceful, the bandage was off his head and he was sleeping now without drugs. Sesshoumaru stroked his puppy ears; barely touching him so as not to disturb the boy's sleep, and he smiled as they twitched instinctively under the slight pleasant sensation, leaning in to the caressing fingers. Suddenly it was all too much for Sesshoumaru; what if his little brother never remembered the time since the Shikon had made him small again. Would Inuyasha be prepared to learn again?

"What am I to do Inuyasha? You are worth more to me than anyone…I could not bear to part from you again…you must live little brother." He whispered; speaking from his heart and not really thinking about what he had said.

"Keh! Course I'm going to live; take more than some bastard with a gun to finish me off." Inuyasha said smiling gently at his tear bright brother who grinned back in great relief.

TBC


	31. Explaining

Chapter 31 Explaining

"Sesshpapa; is everyone alright, he didn't hurt anyone did he?" Inuyasha asked becoming a little alarmed that tears actually fell on his brother's cheeks. Sesshoumaru was so happy to hear Inuyasha call him Sesshpapa again and know that the boy was fully healed and in his right mind, that he couldn't immediately answer. This made Inuyasha worry and he reached up to wipe the tears away and called to his brother again; this time Sesshoumaru replied.

"He hurt _you_ Inuyasha; that is more than enough to make him die."

"Come on Sesshpapa; he shot me in the leg. A bit high up, but I can still have kids; so what's the big deal, is someone else hurt badly? _You_ don't cry over nothing." At this point Jinenji came in, alerted to the fact that his patient was awake by the monitors. He asked if he could speak first with Inuyasha while warning his Lordship with his expression not to tell Inuyasha anything yet. Sesshoumaru nodded at the horse hanyou and went to get some coffee and Danish this time, feeling the need for sugar. He waited at the nurse's station and listened to Jinenji and Inuyasha speaking.

At first the doctor examined Inuyasha again, checking his vital signs and his eye responses and reassured the boy again that none in his charge had been hurt in any way. He then asked Inuyasha what he remembered about the day he was shot; particularly the time it happened. Inuyasha remembered clearly up to the shooting and turned to Sesshoumaru, who had by now come back to sit next to his brother; he looked guilty and his ears were flat on his head.

"I'm sorry Sesshpapa; I was a bit rude, I ordered Hanamama about a bit."

"I know pup; she told me, but you were correct to do so and neither of us consider you rude or disrespectful." Sesshoumaru gave him a small smile and reached to pet the ears to perk them up again. Inuyasha only remembered a blur of activity after he had thrown the pups to safety; and the pain in his upper leg where the first bullet entered. But according to Jinenji, this was perfectly normal and of no concern.

"What aren't you telling me Jinenji?"

"You only remember the first bullet Inuyasha, there were others; do you want me to tell you about it or would you prefer your father to do so?"

"Sesshpapa I think if you don't mind; I suppose that explains why I am still here. A bullet to the leg should have healed almost on its own. It also probably explains the weird dream I had."

"Weird dream, Inuyasha?"

Keh! I dreamt all sorts of strange things as if I was back in the time just after Naraku's death; but I was here. There was loads of stuff, more like a nightmare. It scared me a bit, but I tried to hide and my youkai, I've never seen him so clear; it was like he came and talked to me, sort of dragged me out of myself or something, I dunno. Real weird."

"Do you remember the details?"

"Yeah, but I'd rather forget; who cares about dreams, I'm over it now." He sounded alright but his eyes were a bit too wide and Jinenji nodded to Sesshoumaru that he should tell Inuyasha the truth. He would need to know so he could come to accept what had happened; otherwise if he thought it all a dream he might stay confused, as his youkai knew it was reality and not his mind playing tricks.

So gently Sesshoumaru told Inuyasha all that had happened since he was shot; he told him everything. Jinenji added that it was probably because he was human when injured, and the hanyou aspect of him already subdued, that the confusion had occurred inside his traumatised brain. His youkai had remembered clearly all the time what had happened to him and it seemed was able to bring his psyche back together; complete with memories in their rightful places. No part of him liked to be out of balance now, and had no need to be; each blended well to keep him healthy.

As Sesshoumaru spoke, Inuyasha remembered more, and realised his dream where his senses were confused and he jumped to conclusions was no living nightmare, but reality and he blushed ashamed at how he had been. He'd accused Sesshoumaru and Kagome and completely forgotten everyone else who was important in his life. Why did he always reach too far back when things went wrong; why did he always lash out at the one he loved the most? Oh yes, Sesshoumaru had done awful things to him before; nobody denied that, but he had repaid every beating or harsh word or thought many times over with love and care, he did not deserve to feel the pain of rejection ever again.

Inuyasha was no fool, he knew that Sesshoumaru adored his mate and offspring; but he understood too, the words he had overheard spoken so desperately. He knew how Sesshoumaru felt about him personally, as his pup and his brother; only they shared a complete past that went back to Sesshoumaru's own youth. Hanataba and Kyouko of course, went back further even than Inuyasha; only not in such an intense emotionally charged way. And there again, Inuyasha reminded his brother of their beloved father and a way of life Sesshoumaru had tried to fulfil with himself in his father's place. Sesshoumaru was both complex and extremely easy, for his brother to understand.

Sesshoumaru could see that Inuyasha had lost himself in thoughts once again, but his aura was still calm, perhaps too calm for the news he'd received; although absorbing that sort of information would take time. However introspection was rarely a good thing with Inuyasha, he came to all sorts of idiotic conclusions if left alone with his own thoughts for too long; he could still be such a pup. Perhaps an appeal to the youkai natural element would be more effective; so Sesshoumaru gave a soft 'woof' to call Inuyasha's attention back to him.

It worked; Inuyasha instinctively responded to the sound and turned his huge golden suns back to Sesshoumaru; much to the unvoiced amusement of Jinenji who was assessing Inuyasha all the time that his brother was speaking. It was never cut and dried or textbook, how individuals would react to the news of such near death trauma; although Inuyasha had been in such situations daily at one time. In the past it had made him aggressive, surly and withdrawn; he had been a child who had no one in which to confide or care for him or his troubles. Such was obviously not the case this time.

Inuyasha was now sitting up and looking intently at his doctor and his brother wanting to know when he could go home and was told probably the next day, as he'd only been off the machines and medication a few hours. Inuyasha then got up to go to the small bathroom and Sesshoumaru half seriously warned him that he should not be unaccompanied. Inuyasha blushed and got indignant which pleased the older brother; at least that reaction was completely normal. He watched as Inuyasha stamped off to the little room and smirked until he heard the sound of his brother miserably whimpering.

Sesshoumaru broke the door down and picked up Inuyasha; then carried him to the chair while Jinenji fetched them some drinks. Inuyasha wailed and called himself a freak over and over until he was shocked by a well placed smack on his rear end which was perfectly positioned, as he sat on his brother's lap leaning against him. That sobered him enough to just bring tears about his loss of mane and how dreadful he looked, and how immensely huge and ugly his ears were. Neither Jinenji nor Sesshoumaru were worried about his upset; they were relieved that he had finally had a reaction, which was why the mirror had not been removed from the bathroom.

It was not long before Inuyasha calmed down and he finally heard and understood Sesshoumaru telling him that his hair would grow back; it might take a few months to reach where it had done, but it wouldn't be too long before it at least covered his head. Inuyasha knew this, but it was really the catalyst for the greater woe; Inuyasha soon started to shake again, an involuntary shudder that was so strong even Sesshoumaru was hard pressed to hold him. The boy clung like a limpet to his brother's arms; his claws drawing blood which showed through Sesshoumaru's sleeve and his eyes wide, damp pools of gold.

"What ails you Inuyasha? Nothing is going to harm you now; you are perfectly safe with me."

"I…I nearly died didn't I?"

"Yes pup, in fact you did a couple of times but you were brought back by Jinenji. For which I will be eternally grateful."

"No, no, I can't die Sesshpapa; I just can't."

"It is not in question now; you are better and healed. Inuyasha whatever is the matter; you have been in far more precarious situations than now and yet you never were afraid." Sesshoumaru was getting alarmed, but Jinenji advised that they let Inuyasha speak his fear out. Inuyasha was shaking his head, and had not let go of his grip on Sesshoumaru.

"Never, I never nearly died before; I don't want to die Sesshpapa."

"Hush Inuyasha, it all over now and you have been in this position at times, try to remember so you can gain strength from your victories before."

"No. Before, only you were allowed to kill me, you said so; nothing could touch me while I was yours to kill. I knew that, nothing could kill me; you wouldn't let it." Inuyasha's certainty left chills down Sesshoumaru's spine.

"Do you mean to say that you would engage in any fighting with the certainty you would not be killed because I would not allow it?"

"Yes; I was invincible except near you." Inuyasha's reasoning was that of a young child and Sesshoumaru understood that is all he had been, whenever he had been fighting in the past; a child often fighting for his life with the false sense of security in his worthy sibling's word. It would have made him reckless thinking he was unassailable, allowing him to take risks; all because he could not die unless his brother took his life. The stupid whelp; how often had Sesshoumaru nearly lost him in the past? It didn't bear thinking about and Sesshoumaru held on to Inuyasha; feeling horrified at how perilously close he'd come to losing the boy for good.

"Foolish, foolish child; to take such risks." Sesshoumaru's concern made him sound angry but Inuyasha didn't care; he knew that his brother was just ranting because he loved him, just as he had always done. The bond the brothers now shared was unique; blood tied them as siblings, nurture as father and son. But mainly underneath it all, they were still Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru; who'd had a chequered past before chance had redeemed their relationship, to where they were precious to one another. The road had been long and hard, fraught with misunderstandings and yet each was an irreplaceable part of his brother's soul.

Exhausted for the time being Inuyasha went to sleep, still clutching hold of Sesshoumaru; knowing that to him, his brother had always represented his safety, however ironic that may have seemed to any who knew their history. Sesshoumaru smirked, thinking that Inuyasha's students wouldn't believe it if they saw the pup right now. But by the time his visitors turned up, Inuyasha was bouncy again; much more assured and wanting to go home.

It went without saying the relief that the adults had to see the boy back to normal and it did them all good when the smaller pups came. Sesshoumaru feigned deafness whenever they mentioned how strange Inuyasha looked without any hair; only to hear his brother say that it was nothing and would soon grow back and what was he, a woman to be wimpy about his hair? Mind you at that comment, Sesshoumaru couldn't help a small smirk appearing on his face, which made his little brother blush when he saw him.

Inuyasha was nearly crushed to death when Kouga came; the Wolf Prince was so pleased to see him alive and grateful for the sacrifice that had saved his cubs; that he could hardly lessen his bruising embrace even when Sesshoumaru came to help.

"Let him be Wolf; before you accomplish what the gun did not."

"Oh, sorry pup; yeah, breathe a bit easy now." Said the overly exuberant Kouga; letting him go and patting him on the head, much to Inuyasha's annoyance. But Kouga soon sobered up again and thanked Inuyasha for his cubs' lives once more, before going to Sesshoumaru and talking in such a low voice that even Inuyasha couldn't hear him. But he didn't mind, he was tired; the day had been long and although he was healed, the process took its toll on his youki and he wanted to sleep so he would be ready to return home.

Once he had gone to sleep, Sesshoumaru left him in the care of the watchful Kouga; the wolf had brought the Daiyoukai the news he'd wanted and now he was off to complete his task. The scum who had shot Inuyasha was being held for now in a police cell and Sesshoumaru was going to pay him a visit. He found no difficulty in getting in to the station as the door was open all the time and it was short work to make the few staff fall asleep with a measured dose of his poison, which was relatively harmless in such small quantities.

The man himself was asleep on a pull down bed from the wall of the cell and Sesshoumaru waited, letting out some of his youki to make the man awaken. When he did and was fully aware, he saw Sesshoumaru just leaning against the wall and asked belligerently who he was and what he was doing. Sesshoumaru merely smiled which was enough to make the man's scent fearful and he easily glided to the side as the man lunged at him trying to take the offensive. He instinctively knew that he was in danger.

"Where are the police, you won't get away with anything." He sneered to which Sesshoumaru replied.

"I already have; the officers and everyone else are sleeping as you will be soon, only they will wake up and you won't."

"You can't kill me; I've done nothing to you."

"You attacked my mate, my pups, my pack and you attempted to kill my brother."

"What are you talking about…pups, who calls their kids pups?"

"Some one you will never have seen in your worse drug induced stupor." Sesshoumaru was partially transforming as he spoke, his jaw lengthened and his eyes became red; his silver hair whipped about him and the man's fear was entertaining and welcomed by the more basic youkai, who was enjoying his power. By now the man was cowered in the corner of the cell; his control of his bodily functions had deserted him and Sesshoumaru passed sentence in a deep throaty voice.

"What need do I have for human justice? None at all; I am the justice in my lands and have been for centuries. You meddled with my family which was a fatal error and just so that you know, should any in my care have perished, you would have suffered greatly. Far more than you will now; I am a poison youkai, my poison leaves no traces that any human will recognise so you need not think I shall be concerned about disposing of you."

"You are not human."

"Certainly not; now die." Sesshoumaru's Dokkasou accumulated in his fingers and he held the man in one hand while the poison cloud settled over his head choking him. When it was over, the youkai placed the man back on the bed and left. He knew that while the death would puzzle the authorities there could be no explanation for the events of the evening and so it would be eventually forgotten. Probably put down to heart failure as that is what would have made the man die; induced by some new toxic substance he had probably tried out.

When he returned to the hospital and the still sleeping Inuyasha, he exchanged a self satisfied grin and nod with Kouga who grinned back. Inuyasha whined a little as he sensed his brother's return in his sleep and Sesshoumaru went to stroke his head and whisper 'rest' in his ear. All in all Sesshoumaru was satisfied; the human would no longer cause anyone any harm and Inuyasha would be home tomorrow.

As Inuyasha watched the news on the television early in the morning and heard of the suspicious death of the man in police custody, he just looked across at Sesshoumaru and raised his eyebrows. He didn't need confirmation that his brother had taken care of the problem, but he felt no remorse either. The man had threatened the family and used his gun; his intent was to maim at least and had bragged about killing before, he was no loss. Besides Inuyasha had nicer things to think about; Jinenji had told him he could go home after a final check on his reflexes, which he would carry out later on after breakfast.

Inuyasha was released with great delight from his nurses and Jinenji who were very happy with his recovery. He had been offered a hat to wear but decided against it. He could be as brave as some of the youngsters he'd seen on television who had with cancer and who also had lost their hair and he was humbled by their attitudes. His concealment in place, he was escorted to the car and off home where he was met first by Kagome, who jumped into his arms and kissed him in front of everyone. He liked that welcome and soon he was engulfed once more by everyone else who was pleased to have him back home.

They had prepared a feast in his honour and the whole household joined in with family and guests toasting the health of the young brave Lord of the West. At one time Inuyasha would have been overwhelmed by the accolades and number of people, but no longer; these were family and friends and all were dear to him. Everything seemed bright and fresh, colours were sharp and clear as if his near death experience had washed the world and painted it all anew; it all took on new clarity and everyone was dearer to him than before. Tears of gratitude shone in his eyes, gratitude for his life and the loved ones in it and the fact that he too was just as dear to them.

TBC


	32. Prospects and Words From Long Ago

Chapter 32 Prospects and Words From Long Ago

When Inuyasha returned to his teaching Job a few weeks later, he was feted as a hero. He had taken a realistic amount of time off; it would have looked suspicious if he had seemingly healed so quickly from such dreadful injuries as a human. The hero worship lasted easily for the rest of the term and he had admiring glances and obvious proposals from students and fellow teachers alike. Kagome told him that he was equally famous at university; where the gossip was rife and there were those who basked in his reflected glory, just because they had met him once or twice.

He and Kagome had had a heartfelt talk before she left once again for university. She had mentioned what she had asked of Sesshoumaru and he understood her reasons. The Daiyoukai had said that it was now for the young people to decide between them; Inuyasha was fully recovered and Kagome old enough to make decisions for herself. Mutually though they had come to the conclusion that it would be foolish to drop out so close to the end of her studies; Inuyasha didn't want her to have any regrets when she finally came to him as his mate.

They also decided against a mark of intent; it would cause them distress as they were so far away from each other a lot of the time and when they were together it might put them under too much pressure to indulge themselves. They didn't need it to keep true to one another; or to explain to other youkai that they were together, but not yet ready to mate. Inuyasha and Kagome trusted each other; they needed no outward symbol as deep as any mark. Kagome wore the ring on her engagement finger in any case, which warded off unwanted human interest to a certain extent and youkai could feel the power emanating from the ring and knew she was off limits for casual interest.

They were helped to this decision by something Jinenji said; he would welcome Kagome into work at the hospital if she honed her Miko powers and this would take some time. He could see great advantage in her strength and ability in the youkai hospital. Youkai were rarely ill or injured; but when they were, it was often because their youki was working against, instead of for them. Jinenji had the idea that if she could learn to concentrate her power through a surgical instrument, that a doctor had already positioned as if it were her arrows of the past, she could help isolate a problem and free the area of youki so they could work.

During their discussion on this Inuyasha remembered how Kagome had purified the poison in Kouga's arm from a false jewel shard without purifying the wolf. Then Jinenji said there were times too when sometimes in the past a hanyou had been born with so much strength from one parent and not enough from the other, that the youki inside the child fought with each other and sent the child mad in various degrees. Some youkai were advised strongly not to mate and produce offspring for this reason. If Kagome could purify the weaker youki in such a child, perhaps the prohibition need not take place.

She was not sure of the ethics of such a move in this case, and would wait for further discussions on the idea; but she was willing to see if she could help some of those already born. If she could help anyone regain their sanity she was willing to do so; it had never bothered her ethically to bring Inuyasha back to his in the past. Jinenji concurred, and he would see the panel of doctors to suggest this step forward and they would decide on someone who would be able and willing to try with her.

The idea of using her Miko powers to help youkai was exciting to Kagome, it was a ready made career where she could be most useful and the work could be varied. Sesshoumaru also suggested that she could perhaps be a tutor in the children's wards, where several long term patients could be stimulated with school work according to their age. Many of the children here ended up in the local children's home for youkai as some parents did not want to have them back home. These were children in a very sad position, those whose parents hadn't changed with the times or been able to accept their offspring's difficulties.

Those who would be treated as outcasts at home or deserted as Inuyasha had been in the past; they now found a loving home with others and Sesshoumaru made sure that they had all they needed. It was his pet project and now he introduced it as a future prospect for Kagome. It too delighted her and she agreed to both Jinenji and Sesshoumaru. There would not be enough for work in the youkai hospital alone so she could be on call, but she would find the rest of her working time filled in the children's wards and home.

Jinenji thought this would also be a fine idea, as a child in that situation was often scared and alone as Inuyasha could testify; if she could gain the trust and follow it through from hospital to the home, the child might settle easier. Inuyasha said he could help here, as he had often come into the hospital himself to talk to the children before they were placed in the home. Many he could identify with as they were hanyou of various sorts, some human some not; but some were single blooded youkai who's parents saw the illness as a weakness, but whatever the reason, the child was made to feel wanted and loved at the home.

Many of the 'Home Mothers' were youkai who had either got grown children or had never been mated and as they were so long lived, continuity was good for the children in care. Thankfully these children's situations were rare and there had only needed to be one home in the time it had been run; they'd had many adult successes and sometimes parents even claimed their offspring back. No child in need was turned away however old they were, even if nearly adult and some poor souls had a need to stay beyond childhood and all could help out with each other.

And so Kagome found out some of the things that Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru had been involved in up to the point of finding her again. Both Rin and Shippou too were regular visitors; as they too had been given a chance from being unwanted orphans to much beloved members of a family. So they proved that family didn't have to be actual blood relations; which was a good lesson for those members of the home.

Kagome then decided she would complete her last year and qualify for teaching; then come back home to train using her Miko power. They did however set the date for becoming mates before Kagome returned to university; it would be the day after she got her results, with a human ceremony a few days later on the Saturday. The day could not come soon enough for either of them; but Kagome was not going to waste her time daydreaming, not at this stage; so she threw herself into her study and found the time passed quickly.

Inuyasha spent his spare time researching in his brother's extensive library for information on the powers of Mikos. If there was anything relating on how to train her skills, it would be more than likely in the older sections of writings than in the more modern stuff. Kagome was a rare creature even in the days of the past, with her amount of power; and as time had advanced less and less people had shown the skills that set Mikos apart. Certainly there was no one training them these days. So he was now looking in the handwritten documents, or rather in the computer library of those documents; considering the originals were too fragile for handling.

If only whoever indexed or catalogued these documents had put anything in as obvious as Miko Training…page? No such luck and Sesshoumaru had a surprising number of codices and manuscripts from human writings, besides all the youkai ones. The youkai, who was Sesshoumaru's librarian as well as his museum keeper, had told Inuyasha that if there was any information to be found it would be in the files. Inuyasha wondered if Sesshoumaru knew what was in half of these human writings and he went to ask.

No, they had been collected on his behalf by various individuals under his instruction and collated by trusted youkai. Sesshoumaru was a prolific reader and had been all of his life; but human philosophies were not his preferred choice, although he had extensive knowledge of some of the best. So Inuyasha started at A and worked his way through; he could not afford to miss anything as in the days these manuscripts had been written, Mikos had been fairly common as priestesses; although not as gifted as Kikyou or Kagome and they were a part of many a village life.

When he found what he had been looking for after several months of his spare time had been wasted, Inuyasha laughed; he supposed it should have occurred to him to look here first. '_The_ _Memoirs of a Travelling Monk'_ by Miroku; Inuyasha ordered a copy of the book to take away to read privately and went to tell Sesshoumaru what he had found. The Daiyoukai was astonished that a book by Inuyasha's old friend was squirreled away in his library and called his librarian to him.

The youkai remembered the humans and knew that in his final years Miroku had written quite a bit, and then put all of them together in a binding. He had forgotten over the years that Inuyasha had known the monk at the time he had been writing about. Inuyasha grabbed the copy and took it to his room and opened it to read the first few words;

'_These writings are a faithful account of the group of friends who travelled together in the effort to purify the Shikon no Tama and who contributed to the downfall of the evil named Naraku; as seen by the Monk Miroku, who was once cursed by the evil one. Also it is hoped that they may come in useful to those who may survive me and who live in the future.'_

So Miroku had left a cryptic message for him and Kagome in the pages of his book; Inuyasha's eyes blurred for a moment as he remembered fondly both the friends along the way of their journey, and his Aunt and Uncle, Sango and Miroku. So he read and as he did so the words conjured up images of his friends as nothing else had done for years. It was as if Miroku were right there speaking to him, or telling him the stories he'd loved when he had been a small pup and curled up in Uncle Miroku's lap; while the monk stroked his ears making him sleepy for bed.

Miroku left out no detail and surprisingly recounted his own amorous adventures and shortcomings. His details of the Hanyou and the Miko's relationship was also very astute and made Inuyasha smile ruefully at the insights shed; he'd not realised at the time how obvious they were to the others. But Miroku had always had deep understanding; Inuyasha remembered how the monk would search him out sometimes when he had fought with Sesshoumaru. He would offer his silent, strong comfort and Inuyasha found he would be talking to Miroku before he realised it.

Miroku knew how Inuyasha always felt about Kagome, even though he could be a merciless tease along with Shippou; he knew of the jealousy the hanyou had over Rin and the bitterness he felt at his brother's ill treatment of him. He had written all about these things, but in a tender and sympathetic way; even painting his brother's treatment of him in a way that was not quite as hateful as they had always supposed it had been.

The words of his old friend made him smile and made him cry, depending on what he was reading; he had even treated Kikyou with more tenderness than Inuyasha realised Miroku had felt. Although he hadn't reached the point where Kikyou had saved Miroku at her own expense and Inuyasha was still not aware of that in any case. What was certain regardless was that Miroku was an outstanding observer with a fantastic memory for a human and a gift for writing and story telling. The words were accurate and not exaggerated but easy to follow and absorb.

Inuyasha could not finish it all, as he found that recorded incidents brought back his own memories of the time which although it could be a two edged sword sometimes, was no longer too painful. It evoked the time very clearly, but he was older now and could see how immature he had seemed to be then in action and word. Now he could smile tenderly at the picture Miroku painted of the brash child Inuyasha had been all those years ago.

When Sesshoumaru put his head round the door to Inuyasha's room to tell him that it really was time for bed, Inuyasha was surprised at how the time had gone by and he hadn't anywhere near finished the book. He sensed his brother's scrutiny and gave him a smile; Inuyasha was fine, the book was not causing him harm despite the fact he knew that Sesshoumaru had scented the saline drops he had shed. But in deference to his father's wishes, Inuyasha placed the book carefully by his bed and turned out the light.

Over the next couple of evenings Inuyasha read from the monk's writings and finally he found what he had been looking for. Miroku never indicated the truth as to where Kagome had come from, just that her land was a distance away, but he had left instructions;

'_I write down some exercises that many would do well to meditate upon, but especially those who have the power of a Miko. One of the problems for our companion Kagome was that she had nobody to train her in her strengths in her home, and because of this I have devised a programme that could perhaps help her if she ever comes across these writings in her homeland. I advise her to…'_

There followed teachings on how Kagome could focus her spiritual powers; to harness and control her special gifts so she could use them more specifically than she had been used to do. Once again Inuyasha marvelled at the foresight of Miroku; he had known that Kagome might have need of his teachings and worked out the way for her to receive them and for this many would be able to benefit from Kagome's gifts. Inuyasha only wished that there was some way that he could have thanked the monk and let him know that his plan would work.

He could almost picture Miroku's gentle half smirk as he informed Inuyasha that of course he knew it would work, his plans always worked; and once again Inuyasha felt the keen miss of his old friend and was caught up in nostalgia. He would have liked to see the original writing, but the librarian said it was impossible; the manuscript needed delicate handling and was under a controlled climate. Inuyasha was not surprised and he did have a copy of the text to show Kagome when she was home at the weekend.

The pair of them took a picnic down to their favoured spot in the gardens; the sheltered glade with the pond that sparkled like diamonds as it reflected the light from between the leaves of the overhanging trees. After they had eaten and were just leaning together on the blanket, Inuyasha showed her the book; he was not surprised when she too found tears on her cheeks from the familiar word pattern that Miroku had written. Inuyasha found he could enjoy just sitting and watching the emotions play across Kagome's face as she read the book and her wistful smiles that echoed his own when he had read the words.

Kagome was excited when Inuyasha told her that Miroku had left instructions for her but she wanted to read the whole book first and not skip about; so when she returned to university she took the copy with her. As soon as her evenings were free, she got out the book to read and was glad for Miroku's thorough approach and especially for the last couple of chapters which she knew he had written to reassure her personally.

'_As I write these last few chapters it is with a sense of sadness, as it covers the time since our fellowship parted company. I have also recently lost my beloved wife and her brother, who finally succumbed to their traumatic shared past and died within a day of each other; although I know both have lived fulfilled and happy lives with their loved ones.'_

So Miroku had outlived both Sango and Kohaku but she was pleased to know that they had been happy and Inuyasha had told her that they had all had many children between them.

'_The day we said goodbye to Kagome was the day that Midoriko turned our hanyou friend into an innocent child again. This was distressing for our Miko; but she had hopes to perhaps see him again one day. Inuyasha was adopted as a son of the Youkai Lord of the West, his half brother Sesshoumaru. He was to be given all the care and attention a small orphaned child could want or require and to be brought up to gain his rightful inheritance as the second son of the Inu no Taisho.'_

Kagome remembered that day clearly; distressing was a mild word for the intense feelings of loss she'd had; as Inuyasha's little warm body had left her arms to go to those of his beloved brother. The memory could still make her choke and bring tears.

'_Over the years we have been made most welcome in our young friend's home by his guardian and all who share the abode. It is strange that we and our own children have grown older; my beloved Sango and I have grandchildren and yet Inuyasha, Shippou and Rin look very little aged in that same time. They have been joined in the West by Lord Sesshoumaru's and Lord Kouga's own offspring and Inuyasha is accepted as an older sibling by them._

'_The boy does not yet know the real truth of the stories he hears and loves, I myself enjoy the telling of the tales to a sleepy Inuyasha; after all this time, some sixty years or more, the strangeness of his situation is no more and he is still only a young child who is beloved of my family as well as his own and that of the wolves. If I had one wish, it would be that I could reassure our dear friend and sister Kagome that Inuyasha is loving and truly happy in his new life and makes all around him love him too._

'_There are many tales to tell of this time to date and I will write a few of the more notable as examples for our dear friend, in the express hope that she one day can come to know of these things from an observer who also had our dear Inuyasha's best interests at heart.'_

Kagome kept on reading, smiling at some of the stories Miroku told and grateful for his generosity in writing all this down for her. The information about training to harness her true potential was of great value, but so were the little anecdotes he had left about his and Sango's lives and of course Inuyasha's. He obviously knew that she would have had her doubts about the veracity of anyone else's claims, but not his. He would not have been put under duress to write lies and besides she now knew for herself that Inuyasha had had his soul's wish with Sesshoumaru.

What a precious gift Inuyasha had found and that Miroku had left; for the rest of the time at university all her spare time was devoted to putting his suggestions for her to develop her Miko powers into practice. It was not as hard as she had used to think whenever she saw Kaede or Miroku meditate for hours at a time; Kagome supposed that all the studying she had done in recent years had helped her put important things into perspective. Concentration came far easier now than it had ever done before.

TBC


	33. Finale

Chapter 33 Finale

Time goes by quickly for those who, even though they wait for a momentous and exciting event, keep themselves busy and productive. Neither Inuyasha nor Kagome had any spare moments leading up to her finishing university and their long awaited day of mating and of the wedding. They had decided not to have two separate ceremonies; but to combine them. It was different for her mother who had been married before and for whom the civil ceremony was not as meaningful as her mating this time; but for Kagome there were relatives and friends for whom the wedding was an important occasion, and a mating feast would not be understood.

As it was, because of the timing of the wedding, a lot of the preparations were left to Amai and Rin; who was only too pleased to be helping. Kagome was still busy at university and every free day she got was spent now in being fitted for her wedding dress, and deciding what frills and furbelows were needed for her and her bridesmaids. The men folk wisely stayed as clear as possible while all this hive of activity was going on; not wishing to be drawn on preferences for colour or style.

However both Kagome and Inuyasha made time to visit the children's home so that she would not be a total stranger when she worked there more permanently. They also went to the hospital to get to know the children and Kagome knew she had found her vocation; the children needed her help; they already knew and loved Inuyasha and now they would come to care for her too. There had also been a breakthrough for some of the disturbed hanyou.

Kagome had with her knowledge so far, been able to heal two of the so called incurable adult hanyou. Like Inuyasha had sometimes suffered, one of the aspects of their heritage had been overwhelmed by the other; but in their cases it had caused such imbalance that they could not lead a completely normal life. Neither of the hanyou were dangerous and could communicate intelligently; but they were prone to exhausting fits lasting for days, and because of their strengths could cause damage to themselves and others.

They were willing for Kagome to try and help, and were grateful to her for the attempt, even if it did not work; but this time she was able to focus a lot more and her concentration paid off. She found she could manage to form a tiny but very strong barrier inside the brain of both and seal away half of the strongest youki; Kagome was not sure how long it would last or work for; but it was a start and several weeks later, the results were encouraging to everyone. If it did all they hoped, it might be possible to do the same thing for a baby before any permanent damage was done.

Now Kagome was eager and willing to start working; knowing that she was luckier than many of her fellow students, who may now have the job seeking rounds to do. She had a ready made occupation that she knew she would be able to fulfil and that would be worthwhile. Not only to herself, but those who had shown faith in her; that she would be able to carry on learning and who had helped her attain her goals. Soon too she would be mated to her hanyou and all her dreams up to this point would be complete and Kagome was very happy.

Eventually Kagome's last exam was taken and the last of the parties for leavers had been attended; phone numbers, addresses and email addresses exchanged and possessions cleared as the graduates left the little rooms that had been their homes away from home for the last few years. Inuyasha's youkai was very excited; soon he would claim his mate and the turmoil that had kept him stressed and anxious would dissipate; allowing the hanyou to mature and not be the sad pup he still sometimes felt himself to be.

The final month seemed to drag slowly however, even though there was so much to do; the young couple had to be apart a lot, as various things took their attention away from the other. But too there were things to discuss that required both of them, and they had to agree or decide before the wedding and mating day. One thing of importance was to inform Kagome of the inheritance; Sesshoumaru told them that although the income from the property and its responsibility wouldn't be Inuyasha's for a few more years, he had an investment put aside. Sesshoumaru had used the income for this purpose and had done for the last two hundred years when Inuyasha would have come into it properly, if he'd not become the child again.

Two weeks before the results were due, Inuyasha and Kagome followed Sesshoumaru to the enclosing wall of the Manor estate where he told Inuyasha to touch the wall. A bit bemused, the hanyou put out his hand and it went straight through the wall, dissolving an ancient barrier. Two pairs of eyes turned to the Daiyoukai wanting answers and before they went through the now obvious gateway Sesshoumaru smiled and explained.

"When Father deemed that his second son should have an estate, he provided this for Inuyasha. It still forms part of the Western Lands; it is not therefore autonomous, but you have the right to use it within reason as you see fit. You have been learning how to run it; now it is time to see the house that goes with the land."

"I didn't know there was a house as well, Sesshpapa."

"No; it has been behind the barrier that father had erected. You would only be able to have access when you needed a home of your own on the occasion of your being mated."

"What's it like, is it like the Manor?"

"I do not know Inuyasha, I too have never seen it; the barrier was tied to your youki and human blood alone, only you could break it."

"But suppose I…suppose we never reconciled…"

"The house would have remained untouched as Father left it, in that case pup."

"O.K. Let's go."

"You may wish to go alone at first; it will be your house." Sesshoumaru hung back, in truth he was eager to see the hidden house; but it was only right that the young couple his father had prepared it for were the first to see it. He had to smile at their faces though, as they both grabbed his hands and pulled him with them. They both knew how much it would mean to Sesshoumaru too, to see something his father had made. The path was lined with maple trees and fruiting cherry trees were to be seen in a field close by, making a charming orchard with other fruit trees.

As they turned a bend in the path, an ornamental lake with small stream was flanked by willows making a traditional and pleasing picture. The house itself stood proud on the brow of a small incline overlooking the lake and again was traditional; low, with covered verandas around. There was evidence of gardens laid out in the back; Kagome had grasped Inuyasha's hand and was overwhelmed. It was beautiful and because of the spell and barrier the whole place was as fresh and new as when it was built.

Sesshoumaru could imagine his father having just left and he too stared in awe at the beauty that had been hidden for so long on his property. Inuyasha was silent; he was unable to trust his voice or control for the time being, and so he just led the others to the front of the house. It was large but not huge and it was light and airy inside; simply but comfortably furnished and with ample opportunity to add to and make it their own. The furniture that was inside was tasteful and expensive; there were beds and bureaus, tables and chairs, mats and cushions. Everything looked brand new even though it was in fact hundreds of years old.

Kagome could feel a source of energy somewhere in the house and she went in search of it, followed by the brothers; she was certain it was the anchor for the barrier. The power led them to a smaller room almost central to the house; it was furnished as a study, but one whole wall had a huge tapestry hanging the length and breadth of it. Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha were stunned at the rendition in silks of their Father in Youkai form; he stood overlooking his lands and peoples and the words written down the side of the picture said; _'The Power to Protect'._

Both boys could see that he was looking at them as he stared benignly out of the picture; a small smile seemed to be on the huge jaws and a twinkle in his eyes. The energy had not dissipated with the breaking of the barrier and Kagome could tell that it never would, the father had left all he could as protection for his son's home. What she couldn't tell, but both boys could, was that the Inu no Taishou's scent was also impressed in the depiction of him and would also remain as part of the overall protection.

Sesshoumaru of course personally recognised the scent; Inuyasha didn't, but knew what it was and committed it straight to memory. Kagome stepped back for a while, leaving the two sons standing together with their father's image; both were silent for a long time. Sesshoumaru raised his hand as if he longed to touch the picture but he refrained, it was not his to do so; however Inuyasha took his hand and encouraged his brother to touch. He did, but pulled away as if scalded, the fur was not silk but real hair from his father's pelt; it was the reason for the power and the scent.

"I last saw him just this way; on his mission to save you and Izayoi…I let him down."

"Hey, don't start that again Sesshpapa. He smiles on us both can't you see?"

"Even so…"

"No, look, Father smiles at us both; if you hadn't looked after me properly he couldn't smile at me either, could he? I would never know this place existed if it weren't for you; he must have known you would be here with me so he smiles on us together. He knew it would work out for us Sess; he knew. As he wiped the tears that Sesshoumaru hadn't realised he'd shed from the Daiyoukai's face, Inuyasha felt he was not the pup; but the brother Sesshoumaru required right then. The name Sess came naturally and was different to the 'Sesshoumaru' of the past in Inuyasha's mind; although it was just for now while Sess needed him.

Sesshoumaru stared at Inuyasha in amazement although understanding him immediately, and pulled him into a firm hug; but this time he pushed his head under the younger brother's chin, wanting Inuyasha to comfort him in an unusual role reversal. The younger gently rocked the older, as Sesshoumaru found a strange sense of peace from allowing Inuyasha to take charge of him for a change and letting the pup be the strong one; even if only for a few moments. Sesshoumaru was aware that the years had softened him slightly, as had being a parent; and he recognised that sometimes showing his weaker emotion was ironically a strength, even if he made certain it was a rare occurrence.

"Sess, you are welcome to come here any time you want; this picture is more yours than mine." Inuyasha yelped as Sesshoumaru swatted him at this statement.

"This is your picture Inuyasha, he was your father as much as mine and he protected you in the same way he did me, in the best way he could."

"Yeah, he did; he gave me you when he couldn't be here; forget all that before Sess, this is what he wanted for us both. He'd be proud of how you've become my dad in his place. I can't imagine it anyway else now."

"Neither can I pup; nor do I wish to."

"Hah, you will when Kagome and I mate and move out of your Manor, you will be free at last of all my sometimes too human ways."

"You cannot mean that Inuyasha."

"Well, I dunno; I mean I know I am your clingiest pup even now, and I'm the oldest. I know I need your attention more than any of the others, it must grate on your nerves at times."

"Inuyasha, if Kagome weren't here I would take you over my knee right now for such a stupid idea…"

"Don't let _me_ stop you Sesshoumaru, he deserves it." Kagome was glaring at the hanyou who looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Whoa, I'm sorry alright; I didn't mean anything."

"Inuyasha, just because this is your house now, it does not mean I am dismissing you from the Manor; we are pack, you are my son and brother and we belong together. I am not giving you to Kagome; I am only lending you to her. You both belong to me and I am a jealous owner as you already should know. Besides, your mating will not excuse you from your responsibilities to the West; you are the one who will not escape me."

Inuyasha smiled at Sesshoumaru; it was important to him always, to be wanted by his brother and he needed to hear it more often than he realised. Reassured he took his brother's arm and they walked off after Kagome, who had already started to look over the rest of the property. It was worth the time Sesshoumaru had taken to see the faces of the young ones, as they slowly came to appreciate that this was to be their official home.

When they returned Sesshoumaru told them that they could ask for anything from the Manor that they wished, to add to their property by way of furnishing and that a staff had already been assembled who were happy and willing to serve at the Small House; as Inuyasha's property was already being called. They would become Inuyasha's responsibility and Sesshoumaru told him with unnecessary pleasure that once he reached his majority the wages of the staff would come from his own income and not his brother's.

So the time was very busy, at first both Inuyasha and Kagome were a bit wary of asking for anything and Sesshoumaru and Hanataba had to use their prior knowledge of the pair to know what they would like; before various items found their way to the Small House. But they soon were happy to see and ask, Sesshoumaru could always say no to a request and they found there were many things in store that they could have with no detriment to the Manor. So rugs and carpets, all with exquisite designs and colours were also laid on the floors; to fully accomplish their purpose too.

Inuyasha and Kagome too were touched to the heart at the mating gifts they received, many of which were to be put to their comfort and wealth at the Small house; in short they wanted for nothing by the time Kagome's results came through. She had done very well; not the top grades by quite a long way, but perfectly respectable for a girl who at one time had despaired of any sort of credibility from her school work.

Everything was ready, they had a home and jobs; all they needed to take the next step in their lives and finally put all things to rest from their previous journey, ready to start their next. Soon all those who were touched by the Shikon no Tama would have their soul's wishes complete; when these two became one. Bearing that in mind, Sesshoumaru had had one last and very special gift for them before the wedding.

This was a pair of leather bound books, soft leather with gold embossed tooling on the cover and the pages were vellum. The first was a facsimile copy of Miroku's journal; copied in every single detail from the original, right down to the leather binding. But this one they could hold and read without fear of it crumbling away, it was the best that Sesshoumaru could do for them and they were very grateful. The second book was something that Hanataba had suggested they might like as a companion to Miroku's book. It was another facsimile and bound to match the other.

This one though was of pictures, the ones that had been drawn by Shippou, Rin and little Inuyasha and given as childish gifts to parents and the various 'aunts and uncles.' Hanataba had kept all these offerings; making no secret at the time that she collected them and had been given many from the other recipients. These too had been preserved along with those of her and Sesshoumaru's pups and now all found their way into this new book which told the story of their lives and the people in them in the children's' own inimitable fashion.

Sesshoumaru had also asked Amai if she had any of Kagome and Souta's early art works and had included copies of these too. As he said, all pups liked looking at picture books and he was happy to give his future 'grandchildren' something to look at. These were gifts beyond compare to Inuyasha and Kagome; and Sesshoumaru found himself with both arms full of grateful, blushing and overwhelmed pups, as they both went to hug him at the same time. Soon the last minute things had been done and the last advice to the pair had been given and Kagome was taken home to the shrine for the last few days.

The night before the wedding, Sesshoumaru stayed with Inuyasha; he knew that there would be last minute nerves and probable lack of confidence and self worth. They did indeed speak a lot that night and once again confidences were shared; it was a time both would remember privately and would have no need to discuss with anyone else. Then in the morning Inuyasha was as ready as he was ever going to be, and the boys went down for breakfast; where Inuyasha faced everyone else, who had lots of jokes at his expense.

Eventually he was saved by Sesshoumaru who sent him away to get ready with Shippou; it had not been an easy choice who to have as his best man, the one to stand at his side at the human wedding. He had naturally wanted Sesshoumaru at first; but his brother said no, he was representing Inuyasha's father in the wedding party. It would have been impossible to choose between his siblings and besides after Sesshoumaru, Shippou had been the one to spring to mind. The Kitsune had waited just as long for this joining as Inuyasha; when at one time, his not so secret desire had been that Kagome and Inuyasha would become his adoptive parents.

Kagome had had no trouble, Inuyasha's four sisters, her own little sister and Rin's daughters and Kouga's youngest four daughters were all going to be her bridesmaids. She had the option of choosing only her sister or all of the others; and as Kietsu didn't want to be singled out from all her little cousins and friends, the choice was made for her. All the girls were going to look like jewels and when Kagome arrived at her wedding bedecked in traditional white surrounded by her little girls, she took Inuyasha's breath away.

Both he and Shippou were in danger of being overcome at the thought that so many hopes and dreams were about to become reality; and Sesshoumaru was worried for both boys that they may not be able to get through the ceremony without breaking down. He could see the overly shiny eyes of the pair but could not reach them to buck them up. It was Kouga who had the answer; in a whisper only youkai ears could hear he said,

"Inuyasha, don't you dare cry and ruin my woman's day before it starts; save it for later." Kouga smirked when he saw the old flash of anger in his 'nephew's' face; it worked though, the anger had dried Inuyasha's eyes and he took control once more, grinning sheepishly when he caught Shippou smirking too. And so it was that when Kagome reached him, he could fully appreciate her beauty and in the eyes of the humans the couple were married; a true fairy tale come to life. She wore his marriage band proudly and he took hers, and there was no one at all who could cynically doubt the love between them.

At the feast later, Kyouko stood up to make a small speech in the honoured place as Father of the Bride. Thankfully, none of the speakers who were all youkai saw the need for lengthy and irrelevant speeches; they were mercifully brief and sincere, even when they said things that had meaning for the young couple that only a few others would understand. Kyouko's words were heartfelt;

"It is with joy that I stand here before you; Kagome is not my blood daughter but I love her as if she were, her love for my nephew which we celebrate today not only is the fulfilment of their wishes, but it gave her lovely mother to me as wife. Amai and I, along with the rest of the family know that this young couple will be very happy. You have our best wishes and love always, Inuyasha and Kagome."

Then Sesshoumaru stood up to give his speech; as he did so, Inuyasha's heart jumped into his mouth knowing that he too would be expected to say at the very least a few words but now he listened to his father.

"Most of you know how close our family is and its unique structure. Inuyasha is technically my brother but he has been brought up as my son since the death of his mother. In _**all**_ the time I've known him he has shown great loyalty and devotion in every aspect of his life. He has always been a most special child and even though we have had our differences, he has never played false and was always trustworthy in what he has said and done. Kagome I have known since she was fifteen and first fell in love with Inuyasha; she too has more than proved her love for him even from such a tender age, and I can honestly say that I have _**always**_ known that she is the perfect match for him.

"Theirs is a long standing love and they have waited patiently; most of the time, for this day when they are legally joined. There have been many adjustments to be made on their journey, many opportunities to perhaps flout convention and parental wishes; but they have not done so, knowing how important it is for their families that they wed and bond formally. In our eyes this shows great maturity and concern for the happiness of others, and will go a long way in their dealings with each other to be happy and successful in their shared life.

"Inuyasha, you are indeed a gift to your mother and me; we have loved you all your life with us and much before. If it had not been for your own large heart, I would not have the family life I do and would certainly not have had the happiness that such life has given me. You are vital to our life and we do not give you up, instead we embrace Kagome as our daughter wholeheartedly, knowing that you two have a love that lasts forever."

Neither Inuyasha nor Kagome could stop the tears that Sesshoumaru's speech wrung from their hearts. He never lied; he had always known they were right for each other, even when he had tried to kill her back in the beginning of their relationship. Sesshoumaru had known that his brother was falling in love with Kagome back in his father's tomb and had sneered at them, but it had turned eventually into respect as she defended Inuyasha time and again from his brother. Then he came over to them smiling, he wiped their faces before kissing the pair; all the youkai present and some of the humans had understood the significance of his hidden words. Inuyasha eventually was able to stand to form his own reply;

"My life has sometimes been difficult; but many have helped me not only survive, but to attain my goal in being Kagome's husband. I am not very good with words and sometimes I've hurt people without really meaning too but Kagome has always understood and stayed close to me; she is my light and will always be so. But I would like to take this opportunity to say thank you to all of you who have helped me reach this point, especially my parents; they are my parents in all ways, even if Sesshpapa is my brother too. I cannot say all they mean to me…" Inuyasha sat down; he could say no more, but it was enough.

Later Inuyasha and Kagome slipped away to go on their honeymoon, but really to completely become mates in the youkai ceremony. They were not going far; the Small House had been readied for them. They had had the opportunity to go anywhere they wished, any honeymoon destination would have been given them; but Mama had had a word of advice for her daughter. They could travel later in the year whenever they wished; but for her first times with her mate, Kagome might find it better to be close to her familiar things.

Despite what everyone else might say, Kagome might become sore or uncomfortable and prefer to just potter about on her honeymoon; than feel forced to sightsee or waste her holiday opportunity. It would be better for them both to just take the time to get used to one another. So that was how they found each other, alone at last in their new home and about to start their future together. It seemed unreal to Inuyasha to at last be able to hold in his arms, the woman who had freed him to live all those years ago; many years to him although it was far fewer to Kagome.

He could not hold back his tears this time, nor could she but neither felt embarrassed or ashamed; they had come such a long way to be here at this point. Then when Inuyasha finally marked Kagome as his soul mate at the peak of their ecstasy and the final part of Midoriko's prediction came true; Kouga and Sesshoumaru shared looks of satisfaction with Kyouko and Shippou as the expenditure of youkai became apparent to them. Hanataba just put her thumb up at Amai and Rin, while Ayame grinned; thinking that it was just as well for all of them that Kagome didn't realise that everyone knew what had just happened, the girl still had a ferocious temper.

The mating of Inuyasha and Kagome just marked the end of their first journey together; but obviously it was the start of a second, where pups and families would be a prominent part; but so would being adults and useful in their communities. A whole wealth of new experiences lay in store for them, and everything had set off in the right way, with the love and support of their extended family.

THE END


End file.
